L.A. Fire (33 page)

 
I glared at him through my tears, and pointed an accusing finger at him. “How
could you do that to me?” I yelled. “I trusted you. I trusted you to keep me
safe. To not humiliate me. But you practically sent me over the edge in there,
Julian. When I watched you talking to that girl, it was like being stabbed with
a knife in my gut.”

 
Julian’s eyes glinted with that same emotion I couldn’t quite place earlier.
Then I realized what it was. Pain mingled with triumph. I looked at him with
suspicion. “You look happy,” I said, my tone incredulous. “What are you, a
sadist? You’re actually enjoying this?” I screamed.

 
Julian shook his head and slid his arms around my waist. “You’ve been pulling
away, Sarah. Something happened between now and the last time I saw you. You’ve
been distant all day. I feel like I’m losing you. Like you’re slipping away
from me.” He took a deep breath, then cupped my cheeks between his hands. “I’m
sorry about what I did in there. I was acting up. I needed proof that you still
cared, so I flirted with those girls, hoping to make you jealous.”

 
I gave him a hard stare and pulled out of his grasp. “You messed with my
emotions on purpose?” I yelled.

 
“I needed to know you still cared,” he said, his eyes ardent and intense.

 
He looked so sincere, but what Megan had said to me had gotten under my skin. I
still had a strong doubt that I couldn’t shake. “Megan came over to talk to
me,” I said, closely watching a weary expression creep into his face.

 
“What did she have to say?” he asked, his eyes getting cautious and watchful.

 
“She said you’re the one who wouldn’t open up. That you wouldn’t let her close.
That you discarded her because she kept trying to get you to reveal yourself
until it became tiresome.”

 
Julian chuckled darkly. “I’d have to say she has our roles reversed. In any
event, what does this have to do with anything?”

 
I felt dumbstruck. “Are you serious? To me it explains everything. I tried to
get you to open up tonight, and you shut down. Then the next thing I know,
you’re flirting with other women. Maybe you weren’t trying to make me jealous.
Maybe you’ve just gotten sick of my prying, and are now looking for easier
options.”

 
Julian’s eyes became stormy. “I’m
not
trying to get rid of you, Sarah.
Quite the opposite. I’m trying to bring you closer. I want to know everything
about you. What you love. What you hate. What makes you tick. I’m crazy about
you. I’m sorry I tested your trust tonight, but I needed to know the truth.”

 
I looked at him in hurt and confusion. “I would have told you the truth if
you’d asked.”

 
He shook his head. “The real truth is in our emotional responses. I needed
proof that you still cared.”

 
I felt another surge of anger. “So to get your emotional truth you were ready
to leave me totally vulnerable in a very public situation?”

 
Julian grabbed my wrists, and pulled me closer, so that my face was inches from
his. “I would never have let you lose control publicly, Sarah. I would have
caught you and shielded you before that ever happened.”

 
I looked at him in frustration. “You don’t know that, Julian. You can’t predict
the timing of my emotional reactions. It’s not in your control.”

 
His face became grave, and then he nodded slightly. “I’m sorry,” he said, and
gently brushed my lips with his. Something in me melted a bit in response to
his touch, but I was still feeling guarded and hesitant. I pulled back from him
and looked him squarely in the eye. “Tell me to my face that what Megan said is
a lie. That you are in fact willing to open up to me emotionally.”

 
Julian sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “I’m willing,” he said. “And
able.” He stroked my lower lip with his finger, and his soft, seductive touch
gave me goosebumps. “Come to my beach house this weekend,” he said. “We’ll turn
off our cellphones. Go sailing on my yacht. Spend a whole weekend totally and
completely wrapped up in each other, with no distractions.”

 
I bit down on my lip, and considered for a moment. Julian was right. We needed
some alone time. Time away from the drama of our exes. Time away from the
gossip about us at work. If this thing between us had any chance of working,
we’d need to find some solid time to unwind together, and then open up about
ours pasts, our feelings. Julian was studying me closely, waiting for my
response. I squeezed his fingers and said, “Okay. Let’s do it.”

 
All of the tension left Julian’s face. He pulled me closer, then lifted me onto
his lap. “I’m absolutely crazy about you, Sarah. There is no one else,” he
said, looking at me with heated eyes, and stroking my hair. Then his expression
darkened. “Is there anyone else for you?”

 
He must have seen the hesitation in my face, because I saw jealousy and anger
flicker in his eye. He tightened his grip around my waist, and tilted up my
chin so that I was looking directly into his eyes. “Answer me,” he said, his
tone rough. “Is there someone else?”

 
I hesitated again before answering. “No one else comes close to you, Julian,” I
said. And it was true. Julian was incredible. He was caring. Charismatic.
Perceptive. He’d totally swept me off my feet, and opened me up sexually in
ways no one else had been able to. But I couldn’t deny that I wasn’t completely
over Rob. My response to him at
The Bohemian
proved that.

 
Julian’s gaze was fierce as he studied every inch of my face. “That doesn’t
answer my question, Sarah.”

 
I took a deep breath. “I ran into my ex, Rob this weekend,” I said. “And I
realized I still have feelings for him.”

 
Julian’s eyes filled with pain. “Do you want him back?” he asked.

 
“No,” I said, this time without the slightest trace of hesitation. “I want you,
Julian. I want you more than anything,” I said earnestly, and he looked pleased
by my tone. “It’s just my past is still pulling me in the wrong direction, and
I don’t yet know how to fix that.”

 
Julian grabbed me by the hips, his grip strong and possessive. “I do,” he said
hoarsely, then pulled my leg up and around his waist so that I was straddling
him. He fisted my hair in his hand, and pulled back my head. His lips traveled
up the exposed curve of my neck, his soft touch making me whimper. I felt his
lips smile against my skin. “I’m going to remind you again and again of how
right we are for each other.” Then his lips slid softly, leisurely along my jaw
line to my mouth. For a brief moment, his breathing was heavy and predatory,
gusting between my parted lips.  Then he pressed his mouth hard against
mine, urging my lips open with his tongue.

 
I curled my fingers into his hair, and pulled his face closer, wanting to melt
into him completely. I started squirming in his lap, and felt his cock get hard
against me in response. Julian grunted, then slid his hand up my exposed thigh
and under the folds of my dress. He toyed with the lace edge of my panties,
stroking his finger against the skin beneath it. I felt my sex clench in
response. Then he slid off my panties, and started stroking my clit.

 
“You’re so wet,” he said, and I moaned in response. Then he slid his finger
inside me, hard and deep. With his other hand, he tilted my head so my eyes met
his. “This is where I want to be, all the time,” he said in a gruff voice.
Then, his eyes blazing, he added “And I want no one else here. I want this to
belong to me, and only me.” He held my gaze, his eyes fierce and ravenous. “Are
you mine, Sarah? Mine, and only mine?”

 
My sex clenched hard around his finger, and a low murmur escaped from the back
of my throat. I was so turned on, I felt like I was going to explode. Julian
held my gaze firmly, his finger still lodged deep inside me. “Answer me,
Sarah,” he said, stroking my insides.

 
There was only one answer. “Yes,” I said, without hesitation.

 
“Yes, what?” he said, fingering the ridges deep inside me.

 
“Yes, I’m yours,” I said, my voice needy and trembling.

 
He flashed me a victorious smile, then started sliding his finger faster, in
and out, his eyes still on me, telling me he was in control. The eye contact,
his heated gaze, his finger possessing me, was all too much. My sex started
clenching hard, and my breathing became fast and shallow. A delirious pleasure
was coiling tight deep inside me, so tight I felt ready to burst. Julian kept
stroking me hard, spurring on my pleasure, my desire, with his deft finger.
Then he pulled his finger out, and found my clit, rubbing it, stroking it,
making my hunger build even more. I writhed in Julian’s lap, shamelessly
enjoying the pleasure he was giving me. I finally climaxed, crying out, my back
arched, my hips slamming against the bulge between his legs.

 
After the last surge of pleasure had finished pulsing through me, Julian pulled
me against his chest, and drew soft circles on my back. “I’m so glad you’re
mine,” he said. I moaned in response and buried my head into the crook of his
neck. My hands slowly found their way to his belt. I started unbuckling it, but
he stilled my hands. “Not here,” he said. “Let’s wait til we get to your place.
I want you in your bed, spread out before me, completely naked.”

 
The limo driver dropped us off, and we quickly made our way up to my apartment.
As soon as I finished opening the lock to my condo, Julian swept my into his
arms, and closed the door behind us. He carried me into my room, then flicked
on the light switch. Julian’s eyes scanned his surroundings, then his eyes
fixed on a piece of art hanging above my bed.  “Wangechi Mutu,” he said,
sounding pleased. “I see you enjoy surrealism as much as I do.”

 
“I love that piece,” I said. “It’s like an Alice in Wonderland fantasy, and it
gives me crazy dreams.”

 
Julian looked at me warmly, and brushed my cheek with his lips. Then his eyes
became sultry and intense, and he carried me to the bed, laying me down
gingerly on my duvet. “I’m going to undress you,” he said, his passionate eyes
riveted to mine. He slowly peeled off my dress, his hands caressing my curves
as he pulled it over my head. I wasn’t wearing a bra, so once the dress was
off, I was left completely naked, aside from the stilettos on my feet. He
pulled himself back to a standing position and claimed my body with his eyes.

 
His desire was so intense, and it gave me such a thrill to see how much this powerful,
stunning man wanted me. He started taking off his suit jacket, his dress shirt,
and finally his pants, never taking his eyes off me. His movements were slow
and controlled, but I could tell from the look in his eye that it was taking
everything in him not to lunge at me. Once his boxers were off, he stood still
in front of me, and I watched his big, thick cock rise and get rock hard. “Do
you see what you do to me?” he said. “Just the sight of you gets me so turned
on I can’t stand it,” he added, his voice low and gruff.

 
“Spread your legs, Sarah,” he said. “I want to see you.”

 
I did as I was told. He stared down at my exposed pussy, and I heard his breath
hitch. Hunger flared in his eyes. Then he growled, and charged toward me. All
at once, I felt his deliciously hard chest pressed against mine, and he was
kissing me madly, ravenously. His musky cologne and the smell of his skin
invaded my nostrils, intoxicating me. With his lips pressed against mine, I
felt the vibration of his groan in my mouth.

 
We were both in a frenzy, madly devouring each other, unable to get close
enough. “Fuck me, Julian,” I cried out. I didn’t have to ask twice. His cock
pressed against my pussy, and then I felt his heavenly hardness fill me. He
stretched me wide, and went as deep as he could. The sensation of him plunging
into me cry out; my sex clenched eagerly around him, and I dug my nails into
his back.

 
He grunted and said, “harder, baby. Dig harder.” Then he started pumping in and
out of me, his pace hard, fast, and furious. My hips rose to meet each of his
thrusts, while his fingers sunk into my ass and pulled me into him. My gaze was
locked to his. We were fully focused on each other, getting turned on by the
wild need we saw in each other’s eyes. My breathing became ragged. I gasped at
the pleasurable shock of his hard thrusts, and felt my orgasm start to build.
“I’m almost there, baby,” he grunted.