Licence to Dream (22 page)

It was a good thing his injured ankle was giving them both a breathing space, she told herself firmly as she made her way to her own room. She’d be mad to rush into anything.

But as she put on her nightie, she suddenly realised that if Ben limped back along that corridor, she’d welcome him into her bed without hesitation.

Why hadn’t he even tried it?

She tried to settle to sleep and couldn’t. She kept thinking of him and finally faced the fact that
she
was the one keeping them apart.

Why?

Because she was afraid, that was why. She wasn’t usually a coward, didn’t like to think of herself that way.

* * * *

Along the corridor Ben was also finding it impossible to get to sleep. Meriel had made it plain she wasn’t ready for intimacy yet and he’d not tried to persuade her because he didn’t want their first time to be a fiasco with his ankle spoiling things. But it was hard on a man.

He punched the pillow into shape and tried once again to sleep, but in vain. Images of Meriel wearing that sexy nightdress continued to taunt him.

When he heard a door open at the other end of the house, he was suddenly alert. As footsteps moved slowly towards his room, hope raced like lava through his veins and he reached for the bedside lamp, switching it on, looking towards the door . . .

She stood there for a moment, her expression a mixture of bravado and nervousness. His breath caught in his throat, she was so lovely and yet so vulnerable.

‘We’re consenting adults,’ she declared, chin going up in that sassy way he loved so much. ‘We want one another and neither of us can get to sleep because of that. So why not . . . ?’ The words tailed away but her eyes said that she wanted him as much as he wanted her, that she’d come to terms with whatever had been stopping her.

She slid in beside him and he drew her gently into his arms but needed to make something clear first, so cradled her face in his hands and said, ‘It’s not just about sex, Meriel. It’s
you.’

For a moment her eyes searched his then she smiled. ‘I know. It’s the same with me. I need
you
, Ben.’

As they lay there afterwards, he pulled her to nestle against him, not wanting them to move apart. His ankle was throbbing in pain and though he tried to hide that, of course she guessed.

She pushed herself up on one elbow and asked, ‘Would a cold compress be any help to that foot, do you think?’

‘If you don’t mind.’

‘We should use my room, so that I can keep the compress cool and wet.’

He swung himself into a sitting position and stared at her, trying to work out how she really felt about that. ‘Am I staying there afterwards?’

‘Do you want to?’

‘Of course I do. But if you’d rather I didn’t . . . ’

‘You’re treading very carefully, aren’t you?’

He nodded. ‘It’s important to me not to mess things up. I’m in this for the long term.’

She stared at him, but didn’t say anything else, just gave a small nod then cuddled closer.

As sleep slid over him, he could feel happiness and hope murmuring through him as gently as a flowing stream. He loved her already, but it wasn’t time yet to say the words because she wasn’t ready for them.

But she would be, he was getting more and more hopeful about that. 

Ria had to drive near the block where they’d lived for several months, so made a short detour to look at it again.

To her surprise, the two men who’d been on the old Elless property were surveying that one now. Never one to hang back, she parked the car and went across to them. ‘Hi. I saw you working and wondered what’s going to happen to this place.’

He scowled. ‘None of your business. This is private property and I’d be grateful if you’d leave.’

She did as they’d asked, because it was no use banging her head against a brick wall. But after that, she couldn’t resist driving past whenever she was in the area. They were surveying one side of it only, working their way along by the fence. Out of curiosity she drove round the twisting backroads to confirm her guess about which property that backed on to. Yes, it was the Elless block.

She discussed it with Pete, who said he’d wander over that way on foot later for a recce.

Some time later she got back to the campsite from another appointment and found Big Jim sitting in the caravan with headphones on, looking depressed.

She signalled to him that she wanted to talk and he took them off. ‘Where are the kids?’

‘Pete’s on late shift at the hotel, so he’s free now. He took them out for a nature walk.’

‘They love it when he does that.’ She hesitated, then said, ‘It’s getting you down here, isn’t it?’

‘Yeah. Too much noise, too many people. Does my head in. How about giving your friend Bill another nudge? Maybe there’s somewhere out of town that we can rent. We’re having to pay for staying here, after all.’

‘I’m still hoping Bill can find us something that’s free, so that we can save our money.’

‘I’m not contributing enough. I’m an old crock, not good for a young woman like you.’

She laid one hand on his arm. ‘You can’t help having that problem.’

‘It makes me damned useless as a man, though. And I’m nearly double your age.’

She smiled and reached across to hug him. ‘I don’t think you’re too old. We’re kindred spirits and that’s what counts most. And actually, I’ve not been this happy for a good long while.’ She judged she’d said enough and changed the subject by telling him about the men surveying their old block.

‘They want to bring more good old suburbia out here, I suppose. But if the owner demolished that house, he can’t be expecting to stay here, can he?’

‘No. Not our business, though.’ She started preparing tea. Pete and the kids were always hungry.

She’d hate to see the trees and vegetation on the Elless block razed. It was such a pretty place. They’d sneaked on it for walks a few times, with Pete making sure they did no damage. He was very careful about that sort of thing.

* * * *

The following morning Meriel got up before Ben woke. For all their intimacy she still felt wary and uncertain about how to manage the everyday details. She’d never lived with a guy before.

He had better skills in that direction and seemed to have an instinctive understanding of when to push her and when not to push, for which she was grateful.

‘I’ll start on the accounts today,’ he said, sighing.

‘Do you need any help?’

‘Not at this stage.’

Mid-morning she made him a cup of coffee and took it down to his office, stopping in shock in the doorway. He was holding the edge of the desk and pulling a piece of paper towards him along the floor with a ruler. She bent to pick it up for him and saw it was an unpaid bill, then turned to stare at the things on the desk. ‘What are you trying to do here, Elless?’

‘I told you. Sort out the accounts. I emptied the files in the office and brought the contents with me. I need to know where I stand before I go back to Brisbane next week.’

‘I can do that for you much more quickly.’

‘I didn’t want to take advantage.’

‘I thought I was going to be your paid factotum?’

‘Well, as long as you let me pay you for your help.’

She nodded. ‘You’re looking tired. You need a rest.’ He nodded and she knew he must be very weary to admit it.

When she’d got him settled on the sofa, Meriel went back to the room he was using as an office and groaned under her breath as she looked at the mess there. How could any reputable business base its finances on chaos like this? Didn’t they have a secretary, for goodness’ sake?

By lunch time she'd sorted through enough of the paper tangles to know that most of the documentation for the current project was missing. These papers were mainly small stuff, office expenses, car servicing costs, the occasional meal receipt. Where were the most recent bank statements, not to mention the taxation information?

Ben sat on the couch with his foot up, staring at the floor as she spoke crisply, listing the main items things that should have been there.

‘This goes beyond mere carelessness,’ she ended. ‘And the data should all have been entered on a computer. Did you check that?’

He nodded. ‘Phil had said a while back that Nareen was doing it, but there was nothing on the office computer that I could find. I downloaded everything there was on to a thumb drive.’

‘It’s my guess that someone's kept the other receipts away from you – and perhaps some of the money, too. What about Phil’s computer?’

‘I’ll check that next time.’ He stared at her unhappily. ‘I can’t believe Phil would – no, no, he wouldn’t
steal
from me on that scale, surely? He borrowed some money without asking before, but he paid it all back. He’s Sandy’s cousin, for heaven’s sake!’

‘You get rotten apples in the best of families.’ She’d seen enough to guess that this Phil was rotten or at best highly incompetent, which was bad enough. But that other sense had kicked in, the one that made her a good investigative accountant in such situations. She was beginning to feel more than a bit suspicious about this Phil Hantley.

Ben surprised her by saying, ‘I'd better fly back to Queensland on Friday then, instead of next week. I don’t want to leave it any longer to sort out the accounts if they’re as bad as you say. My ankle should be all right by then if I strap it up. And there’s another reason: the clients we’re just finishing a project for have emailed to say they want to see me about the final touches to their landscaping.’ He stared at the floor again, as he added, ‘There are quite a few discrepancies in the accounts, you say?’

‘Yes.’ It was her turn to hesitate. She waited a little longer to hear him say it, but he didn't, so she said it for him. ‘If I’m to be your accountant, perhaps I should come with you?’

He shook his head immediately. ‘Not this time.’

‘Why not? You need someone who understands accounts.
You
certainly don't.’ She was amazed at how much of the financial stuff he’d left to others.

‘You'd distract me.’ His attempt at a leer was unsuccessful then he fell silent again.

She had to shake his arm to get his attention. ‘Don't try to fob me off, Elless. What's the real reason you don't want me to come?’

‘This is something I should sort out on my own. It’s Sandy’s family, so I don’t want to – well, hurt those who aren’t guilty. Phil’s father has cancer, you see. I’m very fond of my uncle.’

He stood up. ‘I’ll get on the Internet and book a flight. Good thing there’s a phone line in my office here, eh?’

After that he changed the subject and didn’t discuss his trip again.

She let that go and got him talking about his plans for landscaping his uncle’s block, because she needed to know more about it if she was to invest in his project.

She was relieved by what he said. He might be inefficient when it came to business details – no, not
might be
, definitely
was
inefficient – but he was inspiring when he talked about the land and by the time he’d finished, she could almost see how it would look when finished.

* * * *

By Thursday, Ben’s foot was much better. ‘I suppose I'd better go and pack. I won’t take much and I’ll bring some more of my clothes and stuff back with me, if that’s all right with you.’

She followed him into the bedroom, feeling shut out and annoyed.

He glanced at her, hesitated, then said, ‘Meriel, you will be careful, won’t you? Perhaps you should go and stay in town at night, just to be sure?’

‘No way. Forewarned is forearmed. I’ll take care, I promise you, and I have my mobile set for instant dial to the police.’

She watched him pile some clothes into the suitcase any old how and clicked her tongue in annoyance. ‘Get out of the way, Elless, and let me do that.’ Scooping the clothes out again, she began folding and rolling them neatly. ‘Are you taking any shoes with you? They'll need to go in first. Something smarter, more businesslike, perhaps?’

He looked down at his sandals and the ankle that still needed a support bandage. ‘I don't think I could get into my business shoes yet. I hate wearing the damned things, anyway. I’m more the casual sort. Phil’s the fancy dresser because he’s the front man.’

‘What about your toiletries?’

‘Hell, yes. I’d forgotten them.’ He limped along to the bathroom and returned clutching a bag.

She took it out of his hands, checking that he’d got everything. ‘Toothpaste? You can borrow mine till you go. Sit down. I’ll fetch your toothpaste.’

‘I'd better get the stuff from the office and put that in, too.’

She followed him, pushing his hands away as he made to scrape up the papers into one pile. ‘Don't you dare! I've just spent hours sorting those out.’ She got some manila folders from her own office and a big marking pen, putting each pile of papers into its own folder, neatly labelled.

He said so little while she was doing this that she peeped at him sideways. He was staring into space again and whatever he was thinking about wasn't making him happy. ‘There you are.’

‘Thanks.’ He looked at his watch. ‘Since the plane leaves at six am, I think I'll drive down to Perth tonight and take a room at one of those hotels near the airport. I'll get a better night's sleep than if I leave here at three am.’

‘You shouldn’t be driving at all with that foot.’

‘It’s an automatic car. I can manage without using my bad foot.’

She stopped trying to persuade him to do anything. She felt cheated and left out after their closeness of the last few days. ‘As you please.’

He pulled her into his arms. ‘Look, I'm sorry. It's just – ’ Again he clamped his lips shut on a confidence, sighed and murmured, ‘Trust me with this. It all started before we met, and I need to deal with it myself. What we do together will be truly shared, I promise you. OK?’

She hugged him. ‘You I trust, though not your capacity to deal with accounts. But your partner, I don't trust at all and I’m worried he’ll pull the wool over your eyes financially.’

‘I won’t let him do that, I promise.’