Life as I Know It (18 page)

It was a picture of the garden. The proportions seemed perfectly correct, with the patio, lawn, and scrub area all included. He’d used a pencil as well as the pens to shade and color the picture. It was incredible that a four-year-old had produced such a masterpiece of perspective and accuracy. I sat next to him and grinned.

“You are a talented boy, Teddy. I can see you are going to go far in this world.”

“What nonsense are you filling his head with?” Grant asked from the doorway.

I held the picture up so he could see it.

“Look what Teddy has done!” I exclaimed. “It’s brilliant.”

“I suppose it is quite good,” Grant agreed. “Did he copy it?”

I shook my head.

“I think it’s all his own work, just from what he’s observed.”

“He shouldn’t be drawing on the floor, though, he’ll get felt-tip on the carpet again.”

“The children should have a table in here where they can draw and paint and do messy things,” I countered.

Grant recoiled at the word
messy
and I rolled my eyes skyward in exasperation.

“What do they normally do all day, for heaven’s sake?”

“I told you, the nanny takes them out. In fact, it’s time we started interviewing for a new one. The children are obviously too much for you while you’re ill.”

“They’ll be back at school next week. Is it worth getting a nanny now?”

“How are you going to get up in time to take them to school,
Lauren?” he asked bluntly. “You haven’t managed to get up until after nine for the last two mornings. They have to be at school by a quarter to nine and you’re going to have to get up at seven o’clock to get them all ready.”

“We wouldn’t have a nanny in time for next week even if we advertised right now,” I pointed out. “Couldn’t you take them to school next week?”

“I’m afraid that’s not possible. My first appointment arrives at eight in the morning.”

“Didn’t you say something about my sister coming to stay?” I remembered suddenly. “Does she drive?”

“Good Lord, I’d forgotten Karen was coming. I telephoned her when you were first taken into the hospital. She said she could take time off work next week to come and help out.” He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “She might do the school run for a few days if we ask her nicely. Give you a bit longer to recover your senses.”

“What’s she like, my sister? Do we get along?”

Grant let out an exasperated sigh, and I knew he was still struggling with the enormity of the fact that I couldn’t remember anything.

The doorbell rang as we were contemplating each other, and I got to my feet, glad of an excuse to be out of his presence. I opened the door to find a plump woman standing on the porch. She had a very short, spiky haircut and large dangly earrings. But it was her clothes that made me stare rather rudely at her. She was wearing a pair of loose-fitting silk trousers under an enormous purple blouse, which stretched over her very ample bosom like a mini marquee.

“Hello, sister dear,” she said, offering me her cheek. “Grant
said you were at death’s door, but here you are alive and looking well. I thought I’d come and help out with the children while you were sick, but if you’d rather I went…”

“Karen?”

“That’s me, little sis. So you’re out of the hospital then?”

“This is really weird—we were just talking about you.” I looked at her speculatively and she returned my gaze as I nodded. “Yes, I came out the day before yesterday, and no, I don’t want you to go.”

“You look in remarkable health for someone who was dying a few days ago. Look, can I come in then? I’ve had a pig of a journey and I’m exhausted.”

“Of course, I’m sorry, Karen. Come on in. You’re in time for lunch if you don’t mind oven fries and ice cream.” She stared at me incredulously, as if I’d made a huge joke, but the smile faded as she looked into my eyes.

“You look… different,” she said, pushing past me while I closed the door. “There’s something about you… I can’t put my finger on it.”

I was saved from my sister realizing that my eye color was slightly different by Grant’s arrival behind me. He took one look at his sister-in-law standing there and hurried over to give her a perfunctory peck on the cheek.

“Well, speak of the devil! I thought you couldn’t get away until next week?”

“You made it sound bloody important,” Karen said, dumping an overnight bag in the middle of the hall. “When you rang from the hospital I thought Lauren was about to meet her maker. I requested compassionate leave, and here I am.”

I smiled at her, liking her already.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” I told her. “I don’t know if Grant
told you, but I’ve lost my memory. I can’t remember anything at all about who I am or what my life is like. I’m hoping you can fill me in.”

Karen stared at me, her eyes almost popping from her round, friendly face.

“Well, bugger me,” she said.

Grant took advantage of
Karen’s arrival to escape with somewhat indecent haste, saying he’d take his account books into the practice to work on them there. He kissed us both, collected his briefcase and vanished to the garage.

“No change there then,” Karen commented as she followed me into the kitchen. She stopped and sniffed the air. “Hmm, something smells good.”

I opened the oven to see how the fries were coming along, and realized they were almost ready.

“I’m going to call the children in for lunch,” I said, slipping on the ankle boots. “Teddy is in the playroom; you’ll never believe what he’s just drawn, Karen. He’s really talented.”

I was aware of my sister’s astonished gaze following me as I hurried out through the utility room to the garden. I realized Karen, as her sister, must know Lauren better than anyone. They had grown up together, they would know each other’s strengths and weaknesses. And I could tell she was an intelligent woman, not someone who could be easily hogwashed.

As I rounded the row of conifers, I stopped and caught my breath. The two girls were sitting opposite each other on the grass, their legs stretched out, feet meeting at the ankles to form a small diamond-shaped arena between their legs. In the middle, Blackie was hopping around nibbling here and there at the brown grass, and Ginny was trying to climb onto Nicole’s lap. Toby was making
brrmming
noises with his digger in the nearby sandbox, now filled with fine silver sand.

Nicole glanced up and saw me watching. “Mummy! Ginny knows her name! She makes little chatting noises when I call her, watch!”

I came and squatted down beside them while Nicole spoke to her new pet. The furry creature was trying to stick its head into her sweater.

“They’re both lovely, and very clever,” I agreed, stroking Ginny and smiling. “But I’ve got another surprise for you. Auntie Karen is here. She’s come to visit for a few days.”

Their eyes lit up and they both grabbed their pets and scrambled to their feet. I could tell from their reaction that Auntie Karen was a favorite relative. I checked that the hutch door was properly closed once the animals were inside, then called Toby and followed the girls up to the house.

Karen was sitting on a beanbag on the floor of the playroom, looking at Teddy’s picture. She struggled to her feet when she saw the other children and held out her arms, folding them into her with a bearlike embrace.

I decided to leave them to their reunion and hurried into the kitchen to check the fries, which were turning dark brown around the edges. After extracting clean forks from the drawer and plates from the cupboard, I peeled some carrots and chopped them into thin fingers. Locating the oven gloves where I’d
hurriedly stowed them the day before, I piled fries liberally onto the plates, then called the children in to lunch. “Don’t forget to wash your hands,” I reminded them.

The girls and Toby climbed onto stools at the central breakfast bar, while Karen followed holding Teddy by the hand.

“You’re right, Teddy is talented,” she commented as she helped him up onto a stool. “I can’t think how no one ever noticed before.”

“Mummy doesn’t usually let Teddy have the crayons,” Nicole said, spitting fries as she spoke with her mouth full. “He makes too much mess.”

Karen’s eyes met mine and I glanced away, embarrassed at Lauren’s shortsightedness.

“Well, he can have them whenever he wants from now on.” I went to the fridge and extracted a packet of ready-cooked chicken portions. “And we’re going to buy a board so we can display all your pictures, aren’t we, Sophie?”

Sophie nodded through a mouthful of carrot and fries. I was cutting pieces of chicken and handing them to the children, who grabbed them eagerly, stuffing them into their mouths.

“I’m sorry this is a bit of a thrown-together lunch,” I said to Karen, offering her a plate of cold chicken. “I’m all at sea after the accident. I can’t seem to get things flowing smoothly yet. It’s the lack of memories, I don’t know how the household ticks; I can’t remember how to cater for five or six and I can’t seem to wake up in the mornings to get going.”

“You appear to be getting the important things right,” she said, eyeing me with interest. “Sophie was just telling me you’ve bought them pets.”

“The children didn’t have anything to do,” I replied, chopping
salad and putting the bowl on the breakfast bar in front of her. “I’m not surprised the nanny found them a handful if she wasn’t allowed to play with them.”

Karen helped herself to a large portion of salad, which she piled next to the chicken, and then she took a heap of fries from the remainder on the baking tray.

“I want to hear all about this accident of yours,” she said as she squeezed tomato ketchup all over the fries and stuck her fork in the resulting mountain of food. “And I want to hear exactly what the doctors had to say about it. I’m surprised they let you home so soon; you’re obviously not yourself at all.”

I told her about the burns to my shoulder and back, but added that they were healing remarkably quickly. “I’ve been given an appointment at the psychiatric clinic next week to help me come to terms with the memory loss, but I don’t really want to go,” I confessed. “Being here with the children is all the therapy I need.”

Karen stared at me as if weighing things up.

“You ought to take care of that burn, at least. I’ll take a look at it later.”

After lunch, I sat still while she peeled away a corner of the antibiotic dressing.

“It’s not bad at all,” she said, surprise in her voice. “I thought it would be much worse.”

“I told you, it’s healing really quickly.”

We cleared away the lunch things while the children vanished into the garden again.

“I thought we might go out this afternoon and pick up some bits and pieces for the children,” I said as I finished loading the dishwasher.

“As long as you feel up to it.”

“I’d rather be out of the house,” I told her. “It’s all so sterile and neat indoors.”

She stared at me again without speaking, and I hoped she had put my dislike of my own house down to the memory loss.

After lunch we all piled into the minivan and headed into town. The children fidgeted and fought over where they would sit, until I told them we wouldn’t go if they didn’t settle down.

“Don’t forget, we’re going in especially to buy a new playroom table, proper paints, and a board to put your paintings on. If you’d rather stay home and bicker while Auntie Karen and I drink coffee that’s fine by me.”

The sudden silence in the van was almost tangible, and Karen chuckled under her breath.

“Now,” she said, settling her not insubstantial bulk into the soft seat as I started the engine and nosed out into the road, “you’ve told me all the medical stuff but not what actually happened. Do you remember anything about it at all?”

I was shaking my head when Sophie piped up from the back seat.

“Mummy had to take us to the park, because Trudy left. She said we were horrible uncontr… ble—something, anyway—brats.”

“Your mother said that?” Karen exclaimed in horror.

Sophie giggled. “No, Trudy did. The nasty nanny.”

“I didn’t like her because she smacked Teddy all the time,” Nicole put in.

“She smacked me, too,” said Toby, not to be outdone.

“So what happened in the park?” Karen asked hastily, before the debate could turn into a full-blown argument.

“It started to rain,” Sophie said. “The sky went really black. Mummy said we must go back to the car, but Toby had thrown Teddy’s ball in the bushes when Mummy wasn’t looking and Teddy wouldn’t go.”

“Mummy shouted and went after him,” Nicole added. “And then the lightning came down, right on top of her, and her hair went up in the air and went all blue and crackly.”

Even though while I had been in the hospital I had heard something of the children’s account of how Lauren had looked when the lightning had hit her, my hand went automatically to the top of my head, where Lauren’s blond hair was still brittle and singed, and I gave a heartfelt shudder.

“Good grief,” Karen exclaimed. “What did you do then?”

“There was a man in the park, he’d been talking to Mummy, and he phoned up the hospital on Mummy’s mobile phone.” Sophie took up the story again. “The man waited until the ambulance came and took her away.”

“Yeah, he was crying, yuck,” Toby said from the back.

I stiffened in the driving seat, and felt Karen’s eyes upon me. Fortunately, we were on the edge of town and I had to concentrate on the traffic and where we were going to park.

The conversation was put on hold until much later, when we were home again and Karen and I were trying to work out the assembly instructions for the vinyl-topped table in the utility room while the children watched the late-afternoon children’s programs on TV.

“What does Grant make of all this?” Karen asked, holding a table leg in place while I applied glue.

“He seems to be very insecure about the whole thing. He actually asked me if I had really lost my memory.”

“And have you?”

I stared at Karen, nervous that she should ask such a thing. “I’d hardly make something like that up.”

She eyed me skeptically and I felt myself flush under her steady gaze. “You always did like to be the center of attention.”