Lost Soul (16 page)

“Not that you don’t make a great waitress,” Michael replied.
 
“In fact, you’re so good you make me want to buy drinks I don’t even like just because you suggested them.” He winked.

Jessica chuckled and took another pull from her margarita.

“So what about you, Michael?”
 
Are you living your dream?” Jessica asked, peeking at him from underneath her long lashes.

“Not even close,” he answered unequivocally.
 
“I made a lot of stupid choices and screwed everything up, and now I have to deal with the consequences,” Michael explained darkly, his eyes clouding up as he dropped his gaze to the table.

Jessica was impressed by his honesty.
 
Most people, guys especially, were too proud to admit that their problems were their own fault.
 
“So I guess we have that in common,” Jessica responded softly, placing her hand on his arm.
 
She felt a connection to him she couldn’t explain, and she felt the need to comfort him.

Michael looked up to find her smiling kindly at him and his heart expanded.
 
He gulped as he stared into her eyes, his mind a confusing whirlwind of devotion and desire.

“How long are you in town?” Jessica asked, not breaking their stare, and Michael sensed another question hidden in her words.

“Just for tonight,” he answered longingly, glancing at Maxwell celebrating on the other side of the room.
 
He knew tomorrow would take them to another business in another town, where Maxwell could try out his new sales pitch in hopes of a second score.

“Are you staying at the motel up the road?” Jessica asked.

Michael hesitated, his desire to stay with her warring with his commitment to Maxwell.
 
“No, they didn’t have any vacancies.
 
I think I’m gonna just drive through the night.”

“Where are you from?” Jessica asked.

“New York,” Michael answered.
 
That’s where Maxwell lived anyway.

“Any chance you’ll ever come back this way again?” she asked, hopeful.

“I’ll make sure of it,” Michael replied with a smile.

“That’s a really long drive to make in one night, don’t you think?
 
Wouldn’t you prefer to get a good night’s sleep first, and start fresh in the morning?”

“Yeah, maybe I’ll find another motel up the road aways,” Michael replied, touched by her concern.

“You could stay at my place tonight, if you wanted,” Jessica offered, her voice practically a whisper.

Michael turned to look at her and was caught up in the emotions flashing across her eyes — pain and loneliness and longing all wrapped up in a thick layer of desire.
 
He wondered if she could see the same feelings churning in his.

“I get a little lonely sometimes, too,” she admitted, and Michael’s willpower crumbled.

He knew Maxwell would stay at the bar for a few more hours then crash in the same hotel room as the night before.
 
How much trouble could he get into in just one night?

Michael gulped as he nodded at Jessica, his reasoning lost in the depths of his desire.
 
Jessica’s smile widened in response.
 
“Let me get my things and I’ll be back in a minute,” she replied and Michael pulled some cash out of his pocket to pay his bill.

Fall took the opportunity to confront him.
 
“Michael, what are you doing here?
 
Don’t you have someone to guard?
 
Are you really going to abandon him here?”

Michael whispered a response below his breath, hoping no one would notice.
 
“Don’t talk to me about how to guard, Falla!
 
If you had done your job in the first place I never would’ve met Jessica!”

“I might not have been giving Jessica my full attention that day, but I would never have abandoned her!”

“Really, because if I recall, she was about to die when I stepped in!” Michael replied.

Before the argument could go any farther, Jessica was back with a jacket covering her exposed skin and a purse slung over her shoulder.
 
Car keys dangled from her hand.
 
“Do you want to just follow me?
 
I’m not sure it’s safe to leave a car in the parking lot all night.”

Michael’s eyes widened.
 
She assumed he had a car!
 
He quickly conjured up a vehicle before they exited the building and he prayed no one outside had witnessed its appearance.
 
Now he had to figure out how to drive the thing.
 
He hoped she wouldn’t notice his inexperience.
 
Heck, he hoped he could figure out how to make it go!
 
Fortunately, Jessica’s home was less than a mile from her workplace and the weekday evening streets were relatively empty, so Michael managed to operate the vehicle with no negative effects.
 
It was also too short of a trip for him to second guess himself.

His heart seized when they arrived at their destination: a seedy apartment complex that made the Night Out seem classy by comparison.
 
Why was she living here? He wondered.
 
She was only 20 years old.
 
Why had she left her home and family for this dump?
 
Michael parked next to Jessica and quickly rushed to her side to escort her in.
 
It didn’t seem like a safe place for a beautiful young woman to be alone.

“It’s not exactly the Ritz,” Jessica apologized as she led the way to her apartment, “but it’s not as bad as it looks from the outside.
 
The people here are actually pretty nice.
 
Most of them are seniors who’ve been here for years.
 
Rent control, you know?”

Michael nodded, but his head still swiveled around on the lookout for danger.
 
Only once her key was in her door did he finally relax.

“Don’t you have a bag?” Jessica asked, glancing at his empty hands as she ushered him into her home.

Michael cringed at his mistake.
 
You’d think after all those years of living with humans he’d be better at pretending to be one.

“Oh, yeah, I left it in the car,” he explained.
 
It was a good thing he could conjure up whatever he needed.
 
“Let me run back and get it.”

A moment later he was back at her door, a small suitcase in hand.
 
He rapped on the door lightly before letting himself in.
 
The one bedroom apartment was worn but clean.
 
A crocheted blanket and matching throw pillows made the old couch seem inviting.
 
A plastic milk crate served as an end table and another one propped up a small TV/VCR combo.
 
There were a handful of VHS tapes stacked on top and Michael was curious what kind of movies she liked.

Jessica dropped her head in embarrassment as Michael glanced around the tiny room.
 
“I’ve only been here a few weeks.
 
I haven’t really done much with it yet,” she explained.

“Where’d you live before?” Michael asked.
 

“On campus.
 
I was going to school at Grand Valley State University.”

“Why’d you stop?” Michael asked, gazing into her sad eyes.
 
He knew the question was probably a little too personal, but he couldn’t help it.
 
He desperately wanted to know every detail he had missed of the last 15 years of her life.

Jessica dropped her head in shame, but she still answered him.
 
“I got kicked out.
 
I got arrested for possession and got expelled,” Jessica admitted, a wry smile on her face.

Michael’s eyes popped and his mouth fell open in surprise.

“Yeah, I had a problem for a while there.
 
I don’t know what got into me.
 
I never did any of that stuff before college.
 
But I met some people that liked to party and I guess I just thought it would be exciting.
 
It was….really stupid.
 
I got clean shortly after that, but the damage was already done.”

“Couldn’t you have gone to another college then?
 
Once you were straightened out?” Michael asked, moving closer.
 
He longed to take her in his arms and comfort her.

Jessica brushed her hair off her shoulder and sniffed and Michael thought he saw her blink away a tear.
 
“I didn't have the money.
 
My parents kicked me out when they found out I was doing drugs.
 
Tough love, they called it.
 
They were paying for everything before.
 
Now I can barely afford this apartment, let alone tuition.
 
My friends offered me a place to crash, but I can’t be around them if I’m going to stay clean.”
 
Jessica’s smile was sad but hopeful.

“So, I found this place and got a job and now I’m just trying to keep my head above water, you know?”

Michael nodded and dared to trace her cheek with his hand.
 
“You’re gonna be okay, Jessica.
 
You’re smart, and kind, and hard-working, and beautiful.
 
You’ll climb out of this hole soon enough.”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” Jessica replied, leaning into him.

Michael lifted his hand to her waist and pulled her closer, staring deeply into her amber eyes.
 
He had a million other questions but her nearness distracted him and all he could think about was the smell of her perfume and the warmth of her skin touching his.
 
His other hand traced the length of her arm and she shivered in response.

“Are you cold?” Michael asked, glancing at her thin tank top and bare legs.
 
Spring in Michigan was way too chilly for that little clothing.
 
Jessica nodded and Michael quickly led her over to the couch and draped the afghan around her.

Jessica grinned.
 
Most guys would’ve given her some corny line about how they could warm her up, but Michael was a gentleman.
 
It made her want him even more.
 
She tucked her legs up under her body and curled up next to his.

“What about you, Michael?
 
What’s your story?”

Michael gulped.
 
He knew this was coming; why hadn’t he thought up a story?
 
He decided to stick as close to the truth as possible.

“I was, I guess you could call it a body guard.
 
But I screwed up and something bad happened.
   
The child I was guarding choked and died.
 
I got….transferred.
 
Now I’m in sales.
 
I travel all over the country, so it’s hard to grow any roots.
 
It gets kind of lonely.”

“That must have been devastating,” Jessica sympathized.

“Yeah, it broke my heart.
 
And I felt like such a failure.
 
I should’ve been paying more attention — I could’ve prevented it.”
 
A lone tear beaded up on Michael’s eye and his throat caught in surprise as Jessica leaned in and wiped it away with her thumb.

Her face was only inches from his, her warm breath soft on his cheeks, her normally wide eyes hooded with lust and sympathy.
 
Her lips parted as if to say something, but her breath caught as Michael’s lips opened in response.
 
His eyes lifted to hers, both sparkling with unshed tears, and he cradled her head in his hands as she brought her lips to his.
 
A rush of sensation flooded Michael’s body as their lips met and he gasped as every inch of him tingled with warmth and electricity.
 
Desire swelled in the pit of his stomach and he grasped her closer, longing to feel her body touching his.
 
The pleasure was unlike any he had ever known.

He had always envied humans, always longed to live life the way they did.
 
He wanted to be free to see the world and enjoy every experience it had to offer.
 
He wanted to be able to communicate with others they way they did, to have one on one relationships.
 
He wanted a family and a home, but most of all he wanted to love like they loved — deeply and intensely, senselessly sometimes, and occasionally even selfishly, but whole-heartedly.
 
He wanted to give all of himself to someone — heart, body, and soul — and get the same in exchange.

He was tired of the one-way relationships his kind was meant to have.
 
Always giving his heart away and getting nothing in return.
 
One touch from Jessica was enough to make him realize just how much he had been missing.
 
His flesh vibrated with longing for her touch and she responded by trailing her fingers down his neck and into the collar of his shirt.

Michael’s hands slid down her side and wrapped around her waist as Jessica unbuttoned his shirt and ran her hands admiringly over his well-defined chest.
 
He was immediately grateful that the body he had chosen was appealing to her.
 
His skin sizzled in the wake of each fingertip and he wondered if the burn was leaving a mark.
 
He couldn’t tear his eyes away from hers to look.
 
He could feel his heart pounding under her touch and he wondered if she could hear it.
 
His own fingers crept under the hem of her tank and gently caressed her back, marveling at the creamy soft skin.