Lovely (15 page)

“Oh,” she says with a surprised gleam. “Hmmm … okay.” She glances over at me, then lifts her eyes and looks out into the distance.

“The sunlight shone on his face and the leafy tree shadowed it

Yet in that moment, there was no darkness, there was only light

A light that tugged at my soul, pulling me towards it, drawing me in

Until there was no turning back

The light surrounded me and I couldn’t escape

And for the first time

I didn’t want to

I wanted the light”

I gaze up at the sky and close my eyes. Listening to her voice is like listening to an angel. The words roll off her tongue and linger in the air like a melody.

“So, what did you think?” she asks, curling her lip and waiting for my answer.

I shift my eyes away from the brightness of the sun to the light of her face. “That was beautiful.”

A laugh skips across her lips. “Thank you.”

“I’m kind of having a moment here, Cara. I feel a bit like I’m in one of those nineteenth century romance novels that you like to read.”

“How so?” she inquires, her hair swinging gently with the wind.

“It’s a pretty spring day and a beautiful girl is reading me romantic poetry under an old oak tree.”
It’s perfect
.

A patch of red sweeps over her cheeks and she turns away.

“Why do you do that?” I ask with sincerity, running my hand through my hair in quiet frustration.

Cara fans her dress out in front of her, nervously flipping through pages of the book. “Do what?”

“Turn away like that. You have no idea how beautiful you are, do you?”

She shakes her head and lowers her gaze to the grass. Edging closer to her, I gently lift her chin so she can see in my eyes the meaning behind my words.

“You. Are. Beautiful.” I say it slowly, emphasizing each syllable.

A sigh falls out of her mouth like a soft breeze and I capture it between my lips. I can almost taste her … almost. I fight the urge to draw her bottom lip into my mouth. I can feel her breath teasing me, her fresh scent underneath my nose. Her mouth commands my attention but I manage to land back on her eyes.

“Thank you,” she whispers.

I pull back and resume my spot under the sunshine. “You don’t have to thank me, Cara, I only speak the truth.”

We’re both quiet for a few minutes as we take some time to enjoy the sun. Cara picks up one of the buttercups buried in the grass and twirls it around with her fingers. “I love buttercups.”

I marvel at the tiny flower. “My sister used to chase me around to do that buttercup thing when we were kids. You know, where you put the buttercup under your chin and if it turns yellow, then you like butter. Did you ever do that?”

“Yes.” Her eyes crinkle at the corners. “But I think everyone always ended up liking butter.”

Maybe we’re not that different after all
. I scoot over to her on the grass and snag the buttercup. “Let me see.” I take the buttercup between my fingers and place it underneath her chin.

“Well?” She seems anxious as she waits for me to answer.

“Yup,” I say, “you’re a butter lover. In fact, you’re head over heels in love with butter.”

“My turn.” She pulls the flower from my hand and sticks it under my chin. I feel the buttercup tickling the top of my neck. That and her proximity cause me to shiver.

“What’s the verdict?” I ask, hoping to drag out this moment as long as possible. “Did I turn yellow?”

“Nope.” I see her checking out the stubble along my jaw, trying not to meet my eyes.

“Well, that sucks.” I say, disappointed when she backs away and the moment’s gone. “Oh, by the way, I completely forgot to tell you. I met your sister.”

“I know,” she mumbles.

“You do?”

“Yeah. She told me the next morning when she got home from her shift.”

“Oh. She’s really nice and she helped Colt and me feel at ease. You two resemble one another a lot; well, except for the hair.”

“Yeah,” she giggles. “When we were younger people used to think we were twins.”

My cell phone rings, interrupting our time together. It’s Mom. My stomach lurches and my heart starts to race. “Hey, Mom.”

Cara hears me say her name and grabs my hand.

“Ash, the nurse called and Colt and I are on the way to the hospital to go over the test results.” Her voice is jittery. “Can you get home soon?”

“Absolutely. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

The relief in her voice is evident. “Great, thanks, hon.”

I hang up the phone, take a deep breath, and look over at Cara.

“What is it?” She gives my hand a sympathetic squeeze.

“Colt’s test results are back, and he’s on the way to the doctor. I’ve got to get going.”

“Of course.”

We walk over the hill and back down to the parking lot. Stopping just before we reach Cara’s Honda, I turn to her. “Thank you. You really helped to … I don’t know, just think about something else for a while.”

Her fingers graze my arm and a tingling sensation courses through me. “I’m glad. Listen, just keep the faith, okay. I’m sure your brother’s going to be fine. If you wouldn’t mind, just do me a favor and let me know, okay?”

“Definitely.”

She walks toward her car, waving back. “See you, Ash.”

“Cara!” I call out.

“Yeah?” She whirls around like a ballerina.

I jog over to her and hand her a buttercup I picked from the grass. “For you.”

She inspects the tiny flower and raises her face to mine, her eyes twinkling. “Thank you,” she says, and prances away.

“Goodbye, lovely girl,” I whisper.

Delilah’s the only one home when I get there. She’s sitting on the couch with her legs dangling over the edge, plunging her spoon into a giant bowl of ice cream.

“Hi, baby girl.”

“Hey, Ash.”

I drop my backpack and flop down next to her. “Geez, are you eating your troubles away? That bowl could feed ten people.”

She lets the spoon drop, her eyes filling with tears. “I’m so nervous, Ash. What if Colt’s really sick?”

I pry the bowl from her hands and place it on the coffee table, then rest against her. “Listen to me, Delilah. I’m worried, too, but someone wise told me that we have to keep the faith, so that’s exactly what we’re going to do. Whatever we find out today, we’ll all get through it … together.”

She leans her head on my shoulder as we both watch the giant bowl of ice cream melt into oblivion.

“That would make a really big bowl of soup,” I joke, and she laughs.

After several minutes of watching dust particles fly around the room, the door opens and in walks Colt and Mom. They’re both smiling, so I can only assume good news. Delilah and I immediately stand up.

“So, what did the doctor say?” I hold my breath as I wait for him to answer.

Colt smiles, his mouth relaxed. “Everything’s okay, bro.”

A huge wave of relief swallows up the entire room, taking us along with it. I run over to Colt and hug him tightly to me. “God, Colt, I’m so relieved.” I slap him on the back. “I knew it, though.”

“Okay!” Mom claps her hands with excitement. “Who wants chocolate cake for dinner to celebrate?”

All of us pile in the kitchen at once, talking and laughing and enjoying the relief that the burden of worry has been lifted.

After we’re entirely full of cake, I decide I’m going to see Cara in person to tell her the news, so I send her a quick text.

Me: Hey, can I come by?

Cara: Sure, everything okay?

Me: Yes!

Cara: K. See u soon

Mom’s finishing up the dishes in the sink and I help her load the dishwasher. “I’m going over to Cara’s. Can I take a piece of cake for her?”

“Sure, honey.” She dries the knife on a towel and cuts a piece of cake, placing it in a sealed container.

Delilah and Colt speak at the same time. “Cara?”

Colt sticks two fingers in his mouth and whistles and Delilah does an obnoxious fake faint.

“Yes, Cara. Now go back to stuffing your faces.” I walk across the kitchen to Colt and grab him hard. “I’m so glad you’re okay, bro. I love you.”

“I love you, too, Ash.”

I breathe deeply and finally feel the weight of dread being lifted off my back. I can’t wait to tell Cara the good news. I don’t remember the last time I wanted to share myself with someone like this, unless it involved my dick and clothes flying off. I pull in her driveway and retrieve the cake from the floor of the front seat. Cara must’ve heard me pull in because the knob turns just as I’m about to knock.

Without thinking, I instantly encircle my arms around her and whisper, “Colt’s fine.” I close my eyes tight to prevent the tears that threaten to fall.

She hugs me back and holds on to me until my limbs start to relax and I slowly feel the tension leave my body.

She makes it okay
.

Cara pulls back and studies my eyes. “You alright?”

I reluctantly drop my arms to my sides. “Yeah, I just … I guess I didn’t realize how scared I was until just now.”

She takes my hand and leads me inside. “Come on, come sit.”

I give her the sealed container and her eyes light up when she sees what’s inside.

“Homemade chocolate cake. We had it for dinner to celebrate.”

She grins. “I never pass up an opportunity to have chocolate. Thanks.”

She brings the cake in the kitchen then comes back and sits down next to me on the couch, leaning her elbow on the back, facing me. “So, how’s Colt?” she finally asks. “He must be so relieved.”

“Yeah, he is. We all are. I don’t know if I could’ve gone through that all over again. The memories of my dad being sick are so painful, you know? But …” I sigh, “I would’ve done it though, been strong for everyone. It’s just what I do.”

She casually flips her hair around her finger. “That’s got to be tiring,” she comments. “Being everything to everyone.”

“Yeah, sometimes. But when my dad died, I just kind of took over. I had to … my mom needed me, and so did Colt and Delilah. I had to be the one to hold it all together.”

“But who held it together for you?” she asks, empathy filling the space between us.

I just shrug my shoulders in response, prompting her to reach over and place her hand in mine. I weave my fingers through hers and take a deep breath. Her touch is like a soothing balm, lulling me into a sense of peace. Until, of course, she sees my eyes glued to our tangled fingers and casually pulls away.

I motion toward the hallway. “So where’s Nadine?”

“She’s working. She always works early evening to early morning shift. I typically see her before I leave for school.”

That sounds so lonely to me. “You don’t mind being alone that much?”

“No, I’m used to it,” she says, picking at the fabric on the couch.

I can’t even fathom that. We try to eat dinner together almost every night and it’s a time for us to share details about our days and, of course, horse around. “So you eat dinner alone every night?”

“Yeah,” she replies, chewing on her lip, and I can’t tell if she’s actually okay with it or just putting on a show for my benefit.

I want to fling my arm over her shoulder in a friendly gesture, of course, but hold back. “Well, maybe one of these nights you can come over for dinner. My mom wants to meet you.”

She tucks her hands under her legs and quickly changes the subject. “So, do you want to watch a movie or something?”

“Gee, first a tree, and now a movie … I don’t know,” I tease, “we’re just getting to know each other.”

She throws a pillow at me, but I catch it deftly (because I’m good at that) and lob it right back.

I must have fallen asleep sometime during
White House Down
(apparently she’s a big Channing Tatum fan). I hear Cara’s voice in my dreams and smile.

“Ash,” she whispers. “Ash, wake up.”

My eyelids flicker open and I rub them. “Oh, sorry. I didn’t realize how tired I was.” Standing up from the couch, I stretch my arms and yawn. “I should really get going. Thank you, Cara … for everything.”

“Anytime. I’m really glad Colt’s going to be okay.”

She walks me outside and my eyes are immediately drawn to the sky. It’s filled with the twinkle of hundreds of stars.

She looks up at the same time. “Wow, check out all those stars … so beautiful.”

I turn my head to steal a glance at her. “I’ve never seen anything
more
beautiful.”