Read Maggies Marriage (Cloverleaf #2) Online
Authors: Gloria Herrmann
Michael’s chocolate brown eyes flashed with confusion. She could tell he had no idea how she felt, no clue at all. As he left the room, Maggie felt the familiar sensation of tears building up in her eyes. Crying—one the perks of pregnancy hormones.
***
“You almost ready for bed?” Michael asked, leaning against the archway leading to their living room. Maggie sat the book she had been reading down in her lap. Seeing him stand there, still in his work clothes, his navy blue tie loose around the collar of his crisp dress shirt, his gray slacks hanging perfectly on his toned legs, caused Maggie to feel pent-up desire for her husband. She hated being upset with him.
“Almost,” Maggie answered.
“Well, I’m beat, I’m going to turn in.” Michael yawned. He did look exhausted, the tiny crinkles by his eyes were heavy.
“Michael, can we talk?”
“Sure, babe, what’s wrong?” Michael’s furrowed, showing concern, and he approached the couch quickly.
Maggie swallowed hard. “I know you’re working incredibly hard to make everything wonderful for us, but I just feel like you’re never home.”
“Maggie, we’ve been through this. This is the time when I need to sacrifice in order for our lives to be perfect later.”
“I know, but it’s so hard on Mel, she misses you so much. She needs her daddy.” Maggie’s voice grew rough as she tried to swallow back the pesky tears welling up in her eyes and choking her throat.
“I don’t understand why you are so upset.” Michael’s calm tone was changing.
“You don’t understand? Michael, you’re never home, literally, we see you for a couple of minutes here and there. This isn’t what I signed up for.” Maggie felt her stomach turn sick; the contents were like a small boat being tossed around a raging sea. She begged her body to keep calm, desperately trying to push away the wave of nausea.
“Oh, for Christ’s sake, Maggie, you think I like not being home, or that I like spending almost every waking hour working? Come on.”
“Of course, but Michael, Melanie is young and she misses you. I miss you. You need to be here more, it’s as simple as that.” Maggie could feel herself losing the battle.
Michael got up from the couch, Maggie could feel the emptiness as he turned and looked at her. “Everything I do is for us. It would be nice to have a little support, but instead every time we are alone you want to fight. As if I don’t already have enough pressure and stress in my life, I don’t need the added grief.”
Maggie removed herself from the couch, throwing back the plaid throw that had been covering her. “I do support you. It wouldn’t be a fight if you didn’t work so much. I don’t give a flying crap if you make partner. I want you to be my partner.” Maggie felt like a child throwing a tantrum. Her thin arms were straight against her sides, her hands knotted up into tight balls. She imagined all she had to do was start stomping her foot, and she would look like a full fledged brat.
She felt her emotions spinning out of control; she hated herself for feeling like a crazy person. Lately, she felt like she had no hold on anything. Her emotions were all over the place.
“Maggie, that’s enough. I’m not doing this with you right now. I’m worn out. I don’t have the energy to fight.” He turned away and went to their bedroom.
Maggie sank back on the couch feeling defeated and overwhelmed. What was she going to do? She knew one thing for sure; she couldn’t keep this up much longer.
***
Maggie sat in the small office. The walls were covered in a modern, calm shade of teal and beige wallpaper. It made her nervous being locked inside the sterile room. Nothing was serene and inviting about it, not even the bleached starfish that were mounted sporadically on the walls. Maggie’s mood lately hadn’t gotten much better; she found herself overly emotional and just plain worn out. Cranky, that was probably a better word to describe it. Everything was annoying her, the inner rage that consumed her made Maggie feel disgusted with herself, but she tried to reason that this wasn’t who she was. Then again, Maggie had lost sight of who she was a long time ago, and she wasn’t sure about a lot of things now.
She had been waiting to talk to the doctor for close to twenty minutes. She felt herself growing anxious and irritated when a soft knock echoed off the door.
“Mrs. Trembley?” A man in a stark white coat and an obnoxiously colorful tie peered from behind the door as he entered slowly.
Maggie managed a tight lipped smile and a curt nod.
Try and be nice
.
The doctor took a seat on a small stool that was near Maggie. He pulled up to a computer that was on a portable desk and started to log into it. His eyes looked huge behind the thick glasses that kept sliding down the bridge of his nose.
“So, Maggie, can you tell me why you are here today?”
“I’m here today to confirm my pregnancy.” Maggie groaned inside.
Wasn’t it obvious when I peed in the cup today?
“I see, yes, it says right here that we did send off a urine sample. Let me just check and see your results.”
The doctor was an older man, his hair was primarily white and his face was lined with soft wrinkles. His voice was gentle, and that only seem to grate on Maggie’s nerves more. Under normal circumstances, Maggie doubted she would feel such animosity toward him, or anyone for that matter. With the argument with Michael, Melanie’s busy schedule, and now the pregnancy, Maggie felt overwhelmed and had a hard time just being polite.
The doctor cleared his throat, “Yes, here it is. Well, congratulations, Mrs. Trembley, it appears you are indeed pregnant.”
Whoopie!
Maggie imagined confetti falling from the ceiling.
Interrupting her thoughts, the doctor announced, “We will want to schedule you for an ultrasound to get an idea about how far along you might be. Do you recall the date of your last period?” He held up a small paper wheel that contained a series of numbers and months; he was spinning it slowly to figure out her approximate due date.
Maggie rattled off the dates as close as she could remember them. Satisfied with her response, he explained that her due date was around the start of fall. The doctor wrote a prescription for prenatal vitamins and asked her to schedule the ultrasound with the receptionist.
Well, it was confirmed. Maggie knew eventually she would have to tell Michael. He would be thrilled, of course, he had been pestering her for awhile about having another child. She had been putting it off for as long as possible, not that she didn’t want another child, but to throw a baby into the mix now, when things were so difficult, wasn’t something she had been interested in doing. She had hoped to add to their family once Michael got his priorities straight, once things settled down. Now it didn’t matter what she was interested in doing or what Michael’s priorities were, they were going to have a baby.
The wind was starting to pick up as the sun strained against the cold day in Seattle, letting everyone know that winter was hanging around for a little longer. Maggie could feel the chill as she waited for Melanie to exit the school. Swarms of children came pouring out of the building as a loud bell sounded. Skipping and grinning around a mouth of missing teeth, Melanie’s short red hair bounced happily as she saw Maggie.
“Hi, sweetheart, how was school today?” Maggie asked with heightened enthusiasm.
“It was great, we are going to have our spring concert on Friday. I’m so excited, Mom.”
Maggie could see her daughter was thrilled about the idea of performing. She was the complete opposite of her mother. Melanie was so much like Michael, confident and almost showy. They loved attention, and jumped at any chance to capture it. Maggie, on the other hand, liked to keep under the radar and not draw too much focus to herself. Coming from a large family with three older brothers, it was fairly easy to get lost in the shuffle, but her mother, Mary O’Brien, made sure she kept a close eye on all her children. Her mother also respected that Maggie, her only daughter, was of the more quiet variety and liked her alone time.
Maggie had been attracted to Michael’s confident manner. He wasted no time playing games, and when he saw something he wanted, he went after it. He was the polar opposite and they complemented each other well, at first. Over the last several years, after Melanie was born and Michael grew more insistent about his pursuit of success, Maggie felt herself again getting lost the shuffle of her own life. She had a hard time remembering who she was; she was known to everyone as either Michael’s wife or Melanie’s mother. There was no one who knew her as just Maggie.
She felt a tug on her sleeve, and looked down to see the concerned face of Melanie staring back up at her. Maggie’s thoughts had sent her far away.
“Mom, I’m hungry.”
“Let’s head home, sweetie.” Maggie steered her daughter toward her parked car.
***
“Daddy, I’m so glad you aren’t at work right now,” Melanie’s voice chimed as she fiddled with her kid-sized chopsticks.
They were seated around their dining room table together, which was rare these days. Various large white paper cartons filled with Chinese food surrounded them.
Michael was serving himself some more beef and broccoli when he bent toward his daughter and gave her a kiss on her head. It warmed Maggie’s heart to see him act so tender and sweet to Melanie. It was moments like these that made her fall in love with him all over again. These moments were fleeting, and she wanted Michael to see that.
“Mel, you want some more?” Maggie offered as she lifted a container filled with fried rice.
“No, I want to save room for my fortune cookie,” Melanie answered as she struggled to grip her chopsticks.
“Daddy, are you excited about my concert on Friday?” Melanie gazed up at her father with the admiration that only a child can possess.
Michael looked at Maggie. “I can’t wait to see you on that stage singing your little heart out.”
Maggie said a silent prayer that Michael would live up to his promise of showing up to the concert, knowing how much it meant to their daughter. She couldn’t bear the thought of how hurt Melanie would be if he didn’t attend.
“Maggie, what time is the concert?” Michael asked from across the table.
“It starts a little after five.” Suddenly the chow mein no longer agreed with Maggie as she fought a crashing wave of nausea.
“You okay, hun? You look a little green around the gills,” Michael commented, concern present in his eyes as he narrowed them and watched her.
“Yeah, just getting over a little stomach bug,” Maggie replied quickly as she bounded up from the table as gracefully as she could, given she felt like she was about to lose all their dinner.
Maggie heard Michael whispering in a soft, soothing tone to their daughter, “Mommy will be okay, sweetie. Let’s clean up the table for her.”
***
Michael was sitting at the table with his laptop out and open, a stack of files neatly stacked next to it. Maggie watched him as he hunched over the blue glint of the monitor and typed insanely fast, only to pause to rub at his eyes. The man was always working.
The house was quiet, except for Michael’s rapid typing. He suddenly stopped. He must have sensed her presence.
“Feeling any better?” Michael asked softly.
Maggie shook her head, “A little. Did you put the food away? Where’s Mel?”
“It has all been taken care of. Mel’s in bed.” Michael slowly stretched his long arms above his head and rose off the dining room chair.
He approached her slowly, with a great deal of caution. She inhaled the clean smell of his expensive aftershave. She wanted to smother her face in his chest and drown in his scent. She felt her body stir; she missed her husband.
Michael’s arms encircled around her slender body as he pulled her closer to him, removing any space between them. “I’m sorry about the other night,” he apologized in her ear as he left a trail of quiet kisses along her neck.
“Me too,” Maggie answered, allowing herself to be swept away in desire, swayed by the undertow of passion as Michael’s hands roamed her tender body.
A nagging thought poked Maggie’s brain, but her body quickly shoved it away. She desperately needed him. She brought his solid body to hers, and she hushed her thoughts, quieting them as she deepened the kiss.
Before she knew it, she was laying in the warm afterglow of some of the most passionate love making she had ever experienced. Maggie gazed at Michael. His eyes were closed, his sculpted, naked chest steadily rising and falling, almost hypnotizing her. His dark hair strayed from its usual combed style, lay messy on his head. This gorgeous man made Maggie feel almost maternal towards him. She could see bits of gray hair and tiny smooth lines on his face that weren’t there a year ago. Her heart squeezed with love. Maggie laid her hand gently on his stomach and felt her eyes grow heavy. She said a silent prayer that they could figure things out.
***
Maggie kept looking at her cell phone. The auditorium was packed tight with families there to watch their children perform. Maggie had managed to snag a seat close to the stage, and she placed her purse on a vacant seat next to her to save for Michael. She had received several dirty looks for saving the seat.
Where was he?
The performance was going to start soon, and Maggie kept turning around in her chair to see if she could spot Michael. She had already sent him several text messages and hadn’t heard back yet. She felt gnawing frustration biting at her when the lights in the large auditorium grew dim, and a group of children walked quietly onto the stage. Maggie spotted Melanie in her lavender dress, her red hair shiny against the stage lights. She smiled and forgot about Michael as she saw how lovely her daughter looked amongst her classmates. Music started playing, and the angelic voices of the first grade class filled the room.
Standing up along with the other overzealous, proud parents and relatives, Maggie clapped her hands as Melanie exited the stage after a beautiful display of singing and dancing. Maggie felt herself burning with anger at Michael. That rage became more inflamed as she saw the sad and confused look on Melanie’s young face.
“Where’s Daddy?”
“I’m not too sure, sweetheart.” Maggie didn’t want to have to make an excuse for Michael.
She was fed up with his failure to be there for important moments like this one. She did everything she could do to remind him; she texted him, left a voicemail, several in fact, and she slipped a Post-it note into his briefcase that morning. What more could she do, besides going deep into Seattle’s downtown business district and kidnapping the man?
***
As Maggie sat in the heavy traffic, Melanie humming the songs she had just performed quietly in the back of the car, she thought about how to handle Michael’s latest failure to choose his family over work. She was fuming by the time she was able to pull into the parking garage of their condo. The smell of rain mixed with car fumes turned her stomach as she got out and went to open Melanie’s door. Melanie remained fairly silent. Maggie could sense her daughter’s disappointment, and it only spurred her own anger further.
Once inside, Maggie made a plan, and it wasn’t the most rational. Grabbing a small suitcase from the hall closet, she began to fill it with various clothing. Melanie sat on the couch and fiddled with her handheld game.
“Mel, how do you feel about seeing Uncle Liam?” Maggie asked.
The little girl’s face beamed with a happy light. “Yay! I would love to see him. Can we see Grams too?”
“I think we might be able to arrange that,” Maggie replied softly as she started to pack some of Melanie’s clothing.
This impromptu trip was just what she needed. She felt herself ready to explode from all of the week’s tension, and right now she needed to go home. Granted, no one had any idea she was coming to Birch Valley, but she figured she would make the five hour drive to her brother Liam’s cabin. She could always talk to him, and he might be able to help her sort out things. She felt lost, and knew that if she were to see Michael right now she would be engaging in an all-out war with him. Maggie had hit her limits, and she needed some space to clear her head. There was no place better than her quiet hometown.
***
The highway leading Maggie to Birch Valley was quiet, even with the weekend travelers on the main stretch. Maggie already started to feel herself relax as she put the car in cruise control and sped along the main route back home. Melanie had fallen asleep; she’d been fairly quiet all evening, even with the excitement of going to see her uncles and grandparents. Maggie knew very well how upset her daughter was, and that only made her that much more angry with Michael, who still hadn’t returned her texts or calls.
Thoughts about how she was going to deal with her husband when she got back plagued her. She hadn’t told him about the pregnancy yet, and guilt was starting to set in. Maybe if she had told him he would have made more of an effort. At the same time, he should have been there for Melanie, regardless. Maggie knew that Michael deserved to know that they were expecting another baby, but for some reason she was reluctant to share the news. She had let her secret well up inside her, and now she was bursting to tell someone.
Driving through the dark mountain passes and keeping a careful eye out for deer, Maggie began to enter the rural town of Birch Valley. The main street was lined with lamp posts, and the ancient storefronts stood like quiet giants in the darkness. No other cars were driving on the roads. Everyone was tucked away, cozy in their little homes. Maggie continued to drive through town and continued on the highway toward her brother’s cabin. He only lived about five miles away from the heart of the community where her parents and other brothers lived. Right now, she knew Liam was the one she wanted to see. She would go and deal with the rest of the family later. Maggie was close to Liam and knew that he’d welcome her no questions asked, no probing for information. He’d just be happy to see her. Liam was easygoing and liked to stay as far away from drama as possible. Maggie felt a twinge of guilt and regret showing up at his home this late. It was a little after one in the morning, she figured he would probably be asleep. Maybe leaving Seattle without calling ahead wasn’t the best option, but she had to get away.
As her car handled the hairpin turn with complete ease, she pulled into Liam’s gravel driveway. In the shadowy darkness she could make out the outline of the cabin nestled in the tall pine trees. There was a sting of cold in the air when she climbed out of her car. Melanie was still sleeping but started to stir now that the car had stopped.
“Sweetie, we’re here.” Maggie had opened Melanie’s door and was unbuckling her daughter’s seat belt.
The only light besides the moon that reflected off the small lake behind the cabin was a dim porch lamp. The yellow light guided Maggie up the walkway as she carried a groggy Melanie. She knocked softly on the door, readjusting the weight of her daughter on her hips. She waited patiently for her brother to open the door. She could hear the weight of his footsteps as he approached and opened the solid wood door.
“Maggie?” said a sleepy-eyed, confused Liam.
“Surprise!” Maggie announced.
Liam moved to aside to let Maggie in. “Yeah, it is.”
Maggie worked her way to Liam’s living room and deposited her sleeping child on the overly large, plaid couch that sat across from an enormous river rock lined fireplace. The comfortable, warm feel of Liam’s home instantly made Maggie feel at ease.
“Want me to start some coffee, or maybe some tea?” Liam offered, rubbing the sleep from his face.
“That would be great.” Maggie followed her brother into the kitchen.