Master of the Dance (48 page)

Kerra turned to face him, her expression a mixture of trepidation and defiance. "Blade, you must see the sense in this plan. We must strike now, while the Cotti presence in Contara is weakened, before my father sends another prince."

"Who has been filling your head with this rubbish? Tell me, so I can have him executed."

"It is my idea."

"To declare war on your father? Is this a yardstick of your intelligence? If it is, I am disappointed."

"I am not! Freeing Contara will benefit Jashimari."

Blade walked over to the table that held a tray with a bottle of wine and two cups, pouring himself a cup. "Starting another war will benefit no one but those fat lords who make their living from war, and your father will not allow you to do this. Are you a complete imbecile? He cannot let his daughter chase him out of a kingdom he conquered fifteen years ago. He would be a laughing stock.

"He would be forced to save face, and that would mean another war between Jashimari and Cotti. Which we would lose very quickly. All your mother's sacrifices would be for nothing, as would everything I have done to aid her. To say that I would find that annoying would be a gross understatement."

"My father would never seek to harm me or conquer Jashimari. Mother would not let him."

Blade sipped his wine, his soft words belying the rage that built within him. "Despite my efforts on behalf of Minna-Satu, Kerrion's power is not absolute. A Cotti King cannot afford to be accused of cowardice. He would be dethroned by one of his brothers, probably Dravis, and your mother and brothers would be executed."

Kerra paled, her eyes widening. "Impossible! He is the King."

Blade banged the goblet down, slopping wine, and strode towards her. Kerra shrank from him, raising her hands, and he gripped her wrist in a crushing grip and snarled, "Listen to me, you damned little fool! The Cotti are not like us. Their king rules not only because of his birth, but his popularity too.

"If he loses too much support, he will be deposed. He has a legion of brothers waiting in the wings to take over. You, on the other hand, will be Queen no matter how stupid you are. Luckily that will not happen for another ten years, by which time I hope I am dead."

He jerked her closer when she tried to pull away. "You showed some sense when we fled from Endor, but now that you are back in the lap of luxury, with idiots bowing and scraping all around you, you have turned back into a damned spoilt brat. Chiana should have put you over her knee a few times and walloped some sense into you, as your mother would have done, had she been here."

Her eyes glinted. "And where were you while I was growing up? Why were you not here to help raise me? To teach me? You left us! I hated you for what you did to Chiana."

Blade frowned at her. "That is my business."

"It is mine too, because it influenced me. I had to listen to Chiana talk about you, and see the pain you caused her. You were the coward who ran away!"

"I am not discussing this with you."

Kerra jerked free and moved out of his reach, although he made no effort to renew his hold. "Well, the other subject is closed. You have put an end to my plans. Although I should point out that one of the lords you imprisoned was opposed to it."

Blade picked up his wine cup with a shrug. "Then he will be released."

"I want to talk about your abominable treatment of Chiana. Since I returned, I have noticed her great sadness -"

"She lost her familiar, what do you expect?"

"Yes, and you have done nothing to help her. She needs you now more than ever, and not empty platitudes."

He drained the cup and refilled it. "I saved her life, then I left to kill Endor."

"She begged you not to go, and you left her in her time of need. She was terrified that you would be killed too. What kind of husband are you?"

"The kind who will not be dictated to by a little snit of a girl. You have no right to lecture me, and it is none of your business."

"I am your Queen! Everything is my business, especially you."

His eyes narrowed. "Why especially me?"

She swung away to avoid his probing gaze, making a vague gesture. "Because of who you are. And who you are married to. I care deeply for Chiana, and I will not have her mistreated. A gentleman would not behave as you do."

The assassin's lip curled as he raised the goblet again and gulped from it. Minna's daughter made him as thirsty as her mother had done. "That is because I am not a gentleman. Nor will I ever be, no matter how you pout and stamp your little jewelled foot. As soon as I am well enough, I shall leave."

She swung to face him, aghast. "No, you cannot! It would break her heart."

"You cannot stop me."

"Chiana can! Once she is recovered, you will no longer be Regent, and she can order you to stay."

He shrugged. "She could, but she knows it would do no good."

"How can you be so cruel?"

"Cruel?" His brows rose, and a slight smile curled his lips. "It would be cruel if I stayed. What could be worse than being so close to the object of your affections, but unable to touch them?"

"Why do you not just say that you do not care? Could it be because you do? Is it you who wishes to avoid this predicament?"

He shook his head. "I merely do not wish to live in this den of lies and intrigue. And I do not intend discussing it further."

Blade put down his empty cup and headed for the door. After a moment's hesitation, Kerra hurried after him, imposing herself in his path. He stopped and eyed her with an irritated frown.

"What if I asked you to stay?" she demanded.

"It would make no difference."

She stared at him, speechless.

Blade smiled. "Did you really think it would?"

"Yes, actually I did. I thought we were friends."

"Well, we are not. I have no friends."

She raised her chin and glared into his eyes. "I would be a bad enemy, My Lord. One day I will be the true Queen, with unlimited powers."

"Tinsharon preserve us. But I do not care what you are. Do your damnedest. I will not be dictated to, not by you or my wife."

Kerra grabbed his arm as he started to step around her, halting him. "She will die without you."

"I doubt it."

"Do you care?"

"No."

"You should, because if she does, you will become Regent again. Was it not to avoid such a fate that you saved her life twice? I was with her while you were away. I know how she pined for you. You swore that you loved her, and that is the only thing she lives for now that Inka is dead. You swore you would not revoke your words, but if you leave, that is what you will be doing. You have trapped yourself with false promises. Your lies have finally caught up with you."

His frown deepened. "Did she tell you that she will take her life if I leave?"

"She did not have to."

"She will not do it."

"She has already tried."

"In a moment of despair."

Kerra nodded. "And what do you think she will feel when you ride away forever?"

"If she had any sense, relief."

Her expression grew sad, and she released his arm. "Do you count yourself as worthless? Is that what the Cotti did to you?"

A slight, wry smile tugged at his lips. "It is not how I feel, but to a wife, it is what I am."

"You are wrong. All she wants from you is affection."

"Of which I am incapable."

"Which you will not allow yourself to show, or feel, I daresay. You put your life in danger to save her, yet you will not allow your icy poise to thaw for the same end. That is even more foolish than declaring war on the Cotti occupation of Contara. Are you afraid people will not respect you? Or that they will lose their fear of you? That is what you enjoy, is it not? That is what you dislike about me, that I do not fear you."

He shook his head. "Nor does Chiana, but it does not bother me."

"She is not afraid of you, but she does fear you."

"How so?"

"Because you hold her heart in your hands, and if you leave, you will tear it apart."

Blade's brows drew together again, and he leant towards her. "Blackmailing me with that will not work."

"Because you do not care? I will wager you do."

"Enough of this!" He swung away, rubbing his brow as his headache redoubled. "What are you trying to do, drive me mad?"

"Caring for someone does not make you weak, My Lord. You are the only one who can make her happy. Does she not deserve it?"

"Enough, I said!" Blade swayed as a wave of dizziness overtook him. The wine had rushed to his head, and, combined with his weakness and spending too long on his feet, made his legs rubbery. He reeled to the table and leant on it, struggling against the darkness that lapped at his vision. Kerra's concerned voice was distant and muffled, then the table tipped and his knees buckled, sending him sliding to the floor with a shrill clatter of silver goblets.

Kerra fell to her knees beside the assassin and placed her hands on his chest, a pang of horror and terror stabbing her heart. The doors burst open to admit her guards and Insash, who hurried over to her as he ordered the guards to fetch Verdan. Kerra looked up at him, raw emotions that she did not care to name clogging her throat.

"What have I done? He just... fell."

"Do not worry, My Queen. I am certain you did not argue him to death. He is weak. He should have returned directly to his bed."

She looked down at Blade. "It is my fault. I should not have taxed him so, now I have made him more ill."

Insash glanced at the fallen goblets and bottle. "More likely it was the inadvisable amount of wine he drank on an empty stomach."

Kerra shot him a hard look. "Do not be so quick to put the blame on Lord Conash, Advisor Insash. Had you not roused him from his sick bed, he would not be in this state."

"No, My Queen. And we would be at war. He chose to leave his bed to stop you. I trust you will not try to instigate the lords again."

"Certainly not. It would be futile in any case. Now that the Regent has ruled on the matter, there is nothing I can do."

Insash nodded. "Indeed."

Kerra glanced around as Verdan trotted in, supported by two guards, his face red with exertion. His eyes flicked over his patient, then settled upon Kerra.

"My Queen," he wheezed, lowering himself to the floor beside his patient, the soldiers aiding him. He placed his fingers against Blade's neck, then lifted the lid of one eye and peered into it. With a soft snort, he stood up and shook his head, frowning, then turned to the two assistants who had followed him in, one of whom clutched a bag.

"Fetch a litter and take him back to his rooms. Give him the potion for pain, and let him sleep."

Kerra rose to her feet. "What is wrong with him?"

"A great many things, My Queen. But apart from his injuries and exhaustion, he is drunk."

Chapter Thirty Two

Chiana woke two days later, weak and feverish. Her maids rushed about, bringing her hot soup and mulled wine. Verdan was summoned and the Queen informed. The old healer arrived at a more sedate pace, and under his own steam, trailed, as usual, by his apprentices. After examining the Regent, he sank into the chair beside her bed and bestowed a fatherly smile upon her.

"So, your husband was right. You will recover."

"Where is he? Is he well?"

Verdan nodded. "He is well enough, and in his rooms."

"What happened? Did he kill them both?"

"Yes."

"But he was wounded?"

Verdan nodded again. "Yes. But do not worry; he will make a full recovery too."

Chiana relaxed and forced a wan smile. "I thought they were going to kill him. Two against one, and assassins both."

"Ah, Chiana, I think your husband is as indestructible as those great frozen mountains to the north, and as cold. Of course, his temper is foul, so I have kept him asleep for the most part. I would not advise a visit until he is feeling better."

Chiana's eyes filled with tears, which spilt down her cheeks in glittering trails. He leant forward and placed a comforting hand on her arm, his florid face filled with concern. "My dear lady, he will be all right. There is no need for you to worry, I assure you. His wounds are not life threatening."

She shook her head. "It is not that. I am sure he will be all right. It is just... he saved my life again."

"Ah." Verdan nodded gravely. "Yes, he does seem to make a habit of that, does he not? How many times is it now?"

"Three." She gulped. "But this is the first time he has risked his own."

"He nearly went over that balcony with you."

"Yes, but that was a spontaneous reaction. I am sure he did not intend to endanger himself."

"I am not so sure of that. Lord Conash does not strike me as the sort of man who does not weigh the consequences of his actions before he does things. I am pretty sure he knew the risk."

"And all because he does not wish to be Regent?"

Verdan sighed and patted her wrist. "So he would have us believe."

"What do you believe?"

The old healer sat back and folded his hands. "I would not presume to guess the thoughts of a man such as Lord Conash. But it does seem extreme."

"I will not see him again."

Verdan frowned. "What are you saying?"

"It will be better for both of us. I can bear it no longer, to be near him, yet so... alone. He has made it abundantly clear that he does not want my company. He will leave in any case, when he is well. I will not make him feel guilty for doing it."

Verdan gazed at her. "If he is as cold as he seems, he will not feel guilty, My Lady. And if he is not, if his aloofness is an act, then your rejection will hurt him."

"If he truly wishes to see me, my guards will not be able to prevent him. My love and devotion evoke nothing but scorn. I want to see what my rejection brings forth."

"Ah. A test." Verdan nodded and studied the Regent, noting the new lines of strength and determination on her face. Her recent ordeals, and the loss of her familiar, had tempered her. Since Inka's death, her gentleness had waned, giving way to a more assertive, assured woman.