Medea (4 page)

A sweet voice, saying, 'Daughter.' It vibrated through my bones and I shivered with fear and delight.

I slept then, and did not weep. I was the daughter of the great goddess, and the next day two black hound bitches were beside my bed when I woke, and Trioda said that I was to be taught the lesser mysteries of Hekate.

They did not, at first, seem to be very intriguing. We searched through the beech woods for a certain fungus, scrabbled through endless grasses for a certain dark-leafed herb, and plucked little purple berries from a tall, fronded, meadow plant. These three things, fungus, leaf and berry, Trioda gathered into a basket made of ferns, which had taken me a whole day and considerable damage to my fingers and patience to construct. We did all this in silence. I was scratched and bored.

'Mistress,' I ventured, following her erect back along the path toward the palace. 'Mistress, what are we doing?'

'Tell me, Medea, what do you see in that basket?' she asked, her voice quite even, but with a strange undercurrent which I could not identify.

'Berries, Mistress, a flat red mushroom and a handful of dark green leaves.'

'That is what you see, is it, acolyte?'

There was some trick to the question, and I considered the things again. I strained my eyes, hoping for another vision, but all I could see was a badly made fern basket - my next one would be much better - and some wilting herbage.

'That is all I can see, Mistress,' I said crossly.

She knelt down so that she could look into my eyes. I will never be tall. I saw inside the hood she always wears in daylight. Trioda with her pale boney face, her beaked nose, her bright eyes and a straggle of coarse white hair. She was almost smiling. She smiled very seldom.

'Medea,' she said softly, 'these are the mysteries of Hekate, queen of phantoms. What you cannot see in that basket, my daughter, is death. You hold death in your hands. With what you carry, you could kill twenty strong men, even if they be heroes in the first flush of their manhood and strength. What you cannot see in that basket, little Princess, is power.'

I stared. Her face was soft, like a woman looking down at a newborn against her breast.

'It is like this, little daughter.' She motioned me to sit down, and I folded into the beechmast, smelling the sharp scent, appreciating the springy softness. 'Men rule the world, as was not the case in the beginning, when Hekate was the Triple Goddess, maiden, mother and crone. Men stole her, fragmented her, bent her worship to their purposes. Have you never wondered why the pine grove is called "Sacrifice Wood"?'

I had wondered, among many other things, and nodded. She shoved her hair carelessly back from her face, letting the hood fall.

'Once, when Hekate ruled and men were recognised for what they are - mere providers of the seed, useful for a space, but of no value in the nurture and feeding of the world - the Summer King walked into that wood every autumn, and there he met… someone. There he died, and his blood drained into the fertile ground. There he was buried, and a new king was found for the next spring. For we do not need men, little daughter, except for one purpose and for a short time.'

I was a little taken aback. I had often played in the Sacrifice Wood with Melanion. He did not like it, saying the wood was too dark and cold. I had always found it cool and soothing.

Trioda spoke quickly, as though she had a lot to tell me in a short time. 'But then men conquered us, Medea.'

'They conquered the goddess?' I gasped.

'No, no, She Who Meets cannot be conquered by men. She who was a Titan before the Cronos-children came and there was war in heaven. Latecomer Zeus gives her all honour, and the ability to grant any wish, if she pleases. She is as powerful as ever, but we are not. Women were conquered here, by stronger arms, more brutal laws. Women belong to men, to dispose of as they please. They are our masters. They forbade the sacrifice of the summer king, took away Her worship, thinned our blood, bound our limbs. They break us, kill us, sell us like slaves. But this they cannot steal. They cannot take away our knowledge, Medea. This I will teach you, all that I learned from the priestess who was my mother. Which herbs will heal. Which herbs will kill.'

'But Mistress,' I caught at her sleeve, 'my father holds Colchis in right of Aerope, my mother, that is the Colchian succession. To be king, you must marry a woman who is next in line for the throne - that is, Chalkiope, when my father is dead.'

'And Chalkiope has no daughter,' said Trioda. 'Therefore if she is to confer the kingship, she must attempt conception again, with a stranger. She must bear a daughter, and that will be hard. She is old for child-bearing, and the penetration of the male will hurt her.'

'It will hurt?' I gasped.

'Men are stronger, harder, cruel. She will accept it in hopes of bearing an heir, as all women do. Except the virgin acolytes of the goddess, most favoured of women, who need not endure the weight and the intrusion and the pain. You will never suffer it, Medea. Be joyful, and remember what I have told you.

'Now, this is called hemlock,' she touched the green leaves. 'It is deadly if it is made into an infusion - we will consider how such a death may be delivered. Mixed with wine it needs a lot of honey to disguise the taste. This is the red fungus,

Mycis Kokkinos.
Grind it to powder when it is dried, and sprinkle it over food. It numbs the mouth on contact, so you must serve it in a savoury sauce. This is nightshade. The whole plant is dangerous, but the berries are most poisonous. Mix them with bramble and other berries and they will not be noticed. Do you understand?' she asked in her usual voice.

I said, 'I understand.' I didn't, of course; but I resolved that I should.

 

The palace of Aetes, my father, was spacious, made of white stone figured with frescoes and inlaid with tesserae. I lived in a small room off Chalkiope's chamber.

I had a fresco. It was of strange trees and brightly coloured flowers such as I had never seen, and in the centre coiled a golden serpent, bigger than life size, with green stones for eyes. I flung myself down on my bed and heard the leather straps squeak as they took my weight. It was tending towards autumn and the nights were cold.

Chalkiope called from her room, 'Is that you, Medea?'

I muttered something, and she appeared, wrapped in a fleecy cloak, her hair unbound and falling to her shoulders.

'What's the matter, Medea?' she asked.

'Trioda says…' I began, then stuck. I could not repeat to my sister, who was not a virgin, what the priestess had confided to me.

'What says Trioda?' asked Chalkiope, sitting down beside me. 'Come into my cloak, you're shivering.'

I was, I noticed. I allowed her to wrap the cloak around both of us and leaned my head against her shoulder.

'When Phrixos…' I felt my way towards a question, not knowing how she would react. She smelt lovely, of skin and sleep and perfumed oil. I sniffed appreciatively and she stroked my hair.

'When Phrixos?' she repeated.

'Did he hurt you? When you lost you maidenhead?'

'Hurt me? Of course, at first.' She felt me nod, and added, 'Only at first. I submitted to his desire, which is proper. And lying with a man is the only way to conceive, Medea.'

'I will never do that, never,' I said into her shoulder.

'Not if you follow the goddess,' she agreed. 'But you are too young to decide such matters, little sister. You are only nine. There is time for the Maiden and the Mother as well, you know.'

'No, there isn't,' I argued sleepily. 'Once virginity is lost, it is lost forever. So says my mistress.'

'And she is correct,' she laid me down in my bed and covered me with the luxuriant fleece. 'But we are women, sister. We have no voice in our own fate.'

'It's not fair,' I heard my voice trail away, lapped in warmth.

'No,' she said softly, taking the light away. 'But it is the way of the world.'

 

I was twelve and a man, according to the centaur method of counting. Jason had grown, all of a sudden, it seemed. He was tall, fair and beautiful. His hair curled golden down his back and his eyes were a light, strange colour, almost green, almost blue. Such eyes had not been seen among the centaurs. I remember when I was brought to Cheiron as a small child, staggering with weariness up the steep path from my father's house, he had asked me whether the son of Aison was blind. But Jason saw well from those liquid eyes. We ran every day, chasing the centaur's goats up and down the steep hills. Jason could run down a goat and pin it as I came panting behind with the rope to tie around the truant's neck.

I was never going to be as tall. I was stocky, even as a child, and young manhood had not given me more than a few spans' height on the centaurs. My hair, unlike the hero's, was black, neither curly nor straight and mostly tangled with burrs. I used to spend patient hours teasing them out of Jason's hair. They always came out with an ouch and a little knot of gold.

We saw a glint of light once in a tree by Cheiron's camp and climbed to trace it. I heard Jason laughing as wings beat around my head. 'What is it?' I panted. He waved an arm to frighten off a frantic mother bird, and pointed. A magpie had woven bright strands of Jason's hair into her nest. The squabs sat squawking in gold thread.

'A royal nurturing,' I said, and we climbed down.

And Jason never forgot his fate and his lineage, although the memories of my parents had faded so that I might not have known them across a market-place. He knew of the prophecy which said that a one-sandalled man would come to depose Pelias from his fraudulent lordship. He whispered to me, as we lay clasped under the goatskins, that he prayed to Hera the Mother that he might be her agent; that he might limp into Iolkos and reclaim his father's kingdom.

We were twelve and then we were thirteen, and the centaurs' festival of Carnaiea had begun. Once a year, under a certain moon, the mares all come into season. It may be that there are magical ceremonies which bring this about, of course - I would not dare enquire into such mysteries. One of the things which precedes it is a boar hunt, for at this time the centaur men have connection with the centaur women, after a feast of boar flesh.

Previously we had been excluded from this hunt and Jason had chafed, wondering if it was because we were human children, not of the race of the small horsemen. 'Can we hunt with you for Carnaiea, Master?' he asked.

The dark eyes surveyed us. We were naked, as he was, and Cheiron handled us as though we were horses. A hard hand ran down to my loins, cupped my genitals, tested my pubic hair and the hair under my arms, tugging. Then a thumb ran across my chin where down was sprouting. He grunted, then treated Jason alike. Then he nodded toward the boar spears, and ran to get one each.

'At last!' said Jason with satisfaction, choosing the longest spear and feeling the edge. I nodded, taking a shorter but thicker spear, and tried not to remember the terrible strength of the boar, the filthy tusks dripping with poisonous saliva, and the death of the centaur boy the year before - exactly a year. They had brought him into the camp, limp and dying, and as they laid him down beside Cheiron's house his guts had spilled onto the earth, a flash of curving blue and red intestines, uncoiling, and he had so died. I hoped I could die silently, as he had. I did not think it likely.

The centaurs did not approve of idle speech, considering it a valuable commodity to be used sparingly and for effect, so that every word was treasured and remembered. Jason and I, said our master, talked far too much, wasting precious words.

'A man has a measure of words, as he has a measure of semen,' Cheiron said. 'More will not be made if he has wasted his substance. Keep silent, humans, on this hunt at least. The boar can hear a hunter's footfall across the mountain forest. He can smell us from a hundred paces. No words, young men.'

We nodded, overwhelmed by the honour of graduating from children to young men. There would be no manhood ritual for us. The eldest priest cut the foreskins of the centaur boys, wounding their breasts with a bronze pin dipped in soot and rolling them in the skin of the sacrifice; the only horse ever killed by the horse-people.

We would not mate as our first gift of seed with a young mare in her first season. She who receives all of the brotherhood into her body, symbolising their kinship with the goddess of horses, whom we Achaeans do not know. Then the queen-mare is garlanded with flowers and led to the sacrifice, and all of her lovers eat of her flesh and drink of her blood, and thereafter are centaurs.

Jason and I were fosterlings, not centaurs. The boys our age had gone from us, joined the clan of men, and we were left with the children, unable to join our friends, cut off from the ones we had known. We had been feeling lonely, but now, it seemed, we were to be admitted to the life of the tribe, to be young men.

Jason and I had lain together since we were children. When we grew newly sensitive flesh, we had touched and caressed, fascinated with the gush of seed, the strange scent, the jolt of pleasure. Cheiron had caught us, beaten us and forbidden us to lie under the same covering, saying that we would waste our strength.

I did not believe it. It might have been so for the centaurs, but not for a human. The earth soaked up my seed every night in silence, and I muttered the only prayer I remembered from my mother's teaching. It was a prayer to Aphrodite, goddess of love, and my mother had told me to say it to my lover, the first woman I lay with:

Lady of Cyprus, delight your supplicant.

Lady of Doves, receive my offering.

Foam born, teach me thy mystery.

 

I began not to burn, as the stories of lovers told grudgingly by Cheiron described - he did not approve of the Achaean fascination with love - but to thirst, as though there was something inside me parching for lack of water. I could not imagine where I would find a human woman to lie with me. Jason, doubtless, would be provided with a bride after he had achieved his destiny. Perhaps she might have a slave or a maiden sent with her who would be given to me.