Men of Mayhem (40 page)

“Kinsey!” I shout and hurl my entire body against it repeatedly.

All of a sudden, I hear her piercing scream and a loud commotion.

“Kins!” Panic fills my veins with my need to protect her. With all my strength, I drive my shoulder against the door, breaking its hinges. 

I run inside to seize her father, who’s slapping her face while she’s lying on her back on the floor, and a red haze overtakes my vision.

She’s hurt
. An animalistic rage courses through me. No one hurts what’s mine. 

Kinsey is blocking her face with her forearms, struggling, when I throw him off her.

He grunts in pain as he sags against the wall. Then he lunges up and comes at me with all his force. His weight crushes the air from my lungs, and he punches me. In turn, I strike him in his nose with my fist.

“Cesare!” she shouts.

“Kins, run! Go!” I order frantically.

Instead, she jumps on her father, and he shoots to the side, flinging her off. Kins hits her head on the floor and cries in pain.

“Kinsey! No!”

She’s not moving when her father bends down and smiles maliciously, now flashing a knife in his hand. Then he jumps on me again, and we topple to the floor, everything after that happening fast. I fight him, trying to take the weapon, and groan when he knees me in the stomach. Then he lifts his hand, ready to stab me, but I catch his wrist, roll over, and with all my power, take the knife and plunge it into his stomach. 

“Motherfucker!” I bellow.

He bucks and spits blood, convulsing while I hurry to Kins.

“Kinsey!” I lift her onto my lap, cradling her head.

Her eyes open languidly as blood trails down her ear.

Anxiously, I ask, “Are you okay?”

“My heart hurts…that’s all.” Then she touches my cheek. “You?”

“I’m okay. But we need help,
piccolina
.”

She sits up and stares at the body of her father. 

“Oh, my god! Is he…?”

“I don’t know.” I rise to my feet and plow my hand through my hair.

Serenity returns to my system now that I know she’s okay, but we have a huge problem at the moment. And there’s only one person who can help me. 

Fishing my phone from my pocket, I make the call. “I need a clean-up crew.”

Unfortunately, the death of Kinsey’s father will tie me to the Syndicate forever—much earlier than initially planned. 

Half an hour later, I’m on the porch with a distraught Kinsey, who’s in shock, while members of the New York Syndicate clean the house and dispose of the body.

Luciano, my father and the Syndicate’s counselor and lawyer, arrives, scowling at me. But his face softens when he witnesses Kinsey’s sad state. 

“You involved the Syndicate in your business, son. You’ll go with me tomorrow to explain this to the boss. I didn’t want you to become part of this so soon, but it’s done now. Come. Let’s go. Your mother’s worried.”

With Kinsey in my arms, I head to my car to take us home.

In the vehicle, Kinsey calms my soul. “I love you, Cesare.”

She loves a killer? I’m a killer, about to become a soldier for the NYS, and within years, I’ll be a
made man
. She doesn’t realize how dramatically this will change our lives.

Still, I seek to give her peace, so I kiss the back of her hand. “I love you too,
piccolina
. Everything will be okay.
Mi prenderò cura di te adesso.
I’ll take care of you now.”

Regrettably, little do I know that my promise will be impossible to uphold.

Right before I go off to college, my parents reveal their objections to our relationship for the first time. My father especially doesn’t like it because he can sense that she’s pulling me away from the mafia life I’m supposed to initiate into after Princeton. But for now, I don’t think about that. I’m happy with Kins, and we’ll make it.

Tonight, my father awaits me in my room. “Cesare, we need to talk.”

Uh-oh, that’s never good.
I hurl my keys onto the desk. “About what, father?”

“You and Kinsey.”

“Why?”

“I think you and she are very close and much too young to practically be shacking up together in your room.”

“She’s my girlfriend, and she doesn’t have anyone else. You know that.”

“I do. And I applaud you for taking care of her, but that’s not your responsibility. Don’t forget that you and she come from different worlds. You need to enjoy your teenage years, son. And after college, you will initiate. Does she know that?”

“No, but she’ll follow me anywhere. Don’t worry about her.”

“I don’t worry about her. I worry about you two together. Cesare, when she’s here, you neglect your friends and you’re always obsessed with being with her. I’m warning you, don’t let her become your weakness.”

My father’s concerned tone upsets me. I know he means well, and we’ve never argued, but Kinsey’s a topic that’s non-negotiable to me.

“She won’t,” I manage to grind out, which belies my statement entirely.

My father studies me, but lets it go and calmly leaves my room.

Nine Years Ago ~ Age Eighteen

Kinsey

Time passes quickly. After my father’s death, I feel liberated, and Cesare and I are madly in love in the months before I leave. Nevertheless, there’s always a feeling of desperation in our relationship because of our impending separation.

Cesare and I share a joyless goodbye when I leave for college. We have high hopes that we can make a long distance relationship work, but sometimes good intentions aren’t enough. 

I’ve missed him terribly, but as life continues, he’s become less approachable. His Syndicate life and college are eating up all his time. We’ve drifted apart in physical distance and spiritual distance as well. It’s taken five months for him to even come to visit me.

In my scant room on campus, we can’t take it slow.

“Kins, I’ve missed you. My cock needs to be inside you.” Cesare kisses me roughly and slams me back against the wall.

My skirt is bunched up while I unfasten his slacks and pump his erection. He swells rapidly in my hands. No time to undress, I want to feel him in me.

He spins me around, his chest against my back, nudges my panties aside, and drives into me. I gasp, and Cesare grips my hips, fucking me from behind as I arch my back to take him in deep. Whimpering, I push back against him while he ruthlessly possesses me and groans into my ear. His hand drifts to my center and rubs me as he pistons inside. And I explode, riding the tide of pleasure in irresistible waves. He growls while slowing his punishing pace and drops his forehead on my shoulder.

After our breathing has calmed, we move to lie on my bed, and I notice his tousled state. He has dark circles around his eyes and looks like he hasn’t shaved in weeks. 

“Cesare, you look…”

“Tired? I am tired.” He pulls me into his embrace and kisses my head. “But I’m better now that we’re together.” 

I didn’t want to say
tired
. No, he looks different. Hardened, perhaps? 

However, we have the next few days to be together, and when we’re together, everything’s perfect.

After that, we continued to see each other every couple of months. Still, as the years passed, Cesare changed more, and so did I, and when we were apart, we were a mess.

Six Years Ago ~ Age Twenty-One

Cesare

My third year in college, the fifth year into my relationship with Kinsey, I realize that our bond has been tainted by our miles apart. 

My life has become one of drugs and murder. I’m getting more and more immersed in the mayhem of the underworld. And my calmness, my home, has been living so far away for years. I’m starting to resent Kinsey and my love for her. I miss her so much that I ache and find solace in cocaine. We fight when we’re apart, and we love obsessively during the few days every couple of months we see one another.

We rarely make love anymore. No, we fuck. During this time, we have rough and hard sex when we meet. Maybe it’s due to the pent-up frustration of being away from each other, especially since we know that if we were together, we’d be happy. The distance is killing us, and that same distance, combined with being a prospect in the Syndicate, makes me lonely. And choices made out of loneliness usually lead to the biggest mistakes. Moreover, drugs combined with loneliness can be lethal. And my solitude, and all the toxic things that came with it, was the catalyst for my creating the first cracks in our love.