Merrick (15 page)

Old Jackman raised
his bushy eyebrows when I entered the dusty shop.

“William Lacy,” he
drawled in his creaky voice. “I thought they had thrown you back in stocks.”

“I was never in
stocks, sir.” I approached his counter and leaned upon it. “What have you got?”

He grunted,
turning to the stacks behind him, and brought three volumes to set on the
counter before me. He fetched three more, and another three, before settling
back into his chair.

I felt a smile
grow on my face. I breathed in the scent: the leather of the books, the dusty
pages and the musty wood of the shelves. Then I set to inspecting the volumes.

I left with two
carefully wrapped tomes in my satchel.

“Lacy!”

I turned at the
shout. Jeremy was stopped across the street, a startled look on his face. He
jogged my way, dodging a carriage and a large group of ladies at lunch.

“Good morning,” I
greeted him. I was glad to see him, but unsure of what he’d think. I had
disappeared so abruptly that month before.

“Shit, Lacy!”
Jeremy looked me over, bewildered. “Quite the vagabond you’ve become!”

“Yes,” I admitted.
“Been a strange couple of months.”

“Back for good, or
no?”

“Back for now.”

“Shit,” he said
again.

I frowned. He seemed
troubled. “I’m back in one piece, my friend.”

Jeremy nodded
slowly, but he didn’t seem convinced. “Right. Well. That’s good.”

“What’s the
matter?” I demanded.

“It’s just…”
Jeremy ran a hand over his mess of brown hair. “Seemed strange, is all. There
was strange talk.”

“What strange
talk?” I asked, nervous. “Come, let’s have a drink.”

“I’m empty.”

“My treat.”

“If you insist.”
Jeremy smiled, but then he looked worried again.

In the tavern, we
raised our mugs and had a bit of small talk before Jeremy began to explain.

“There was this
boy hanging around those last few days before you disappeared. Strange chap.
Funny shade of hair, kind of a red, kind of a red coffee color. And fancy.”

“Is that right?” I
suppressed a cringe. Could Theo be more conspicuous?

“Strangest eyes,”
Jeremy said, his own eyes going distant at the memory. “Never seen such a shade
of blue. It was like they glowed. I don’t know. somethin’ about him gave me a
chill. Anyway, after you dropped off the earth, I went to see your poor mum.
She was keepin’ calm, lovely woman she is. Lovely, lovely woman she is....”

“Shut your hole.”

Jeremy smiled a
little. He’d always had a crush on my mum. “Well,” he continued. “Funny thing
was, she thought you’d been missin’ since about a day before I last saw you.
‘Fore I could figure it out, she mentioned another friend of yours had been by
out of worry, askin’ where you were,. Which friend, I says. She didn’t get his
name, she says, but he was the one with the dark red hair and the beautiful
blue eyes.”

I was going to
kill the rat bastard. My fingers were tight on my mug.

“About a week
after that, Billy Bogle stopped by the tavern. He said he saw a guy who looked
just like you gettin’ mugged and tossed into a coach. Said there was a guy
there who looked real rich, real fancy, with dark red hair.” Jeremy paused.
“Next thing I know, your mum sends word you’ve gone back to that old man’s
cottage on some kind of whim, and you’re safe and sound. A couple weeks later,
here you are.” He squinted at me. “So what the bloody hell happened?”

I wasn’t,
unfortunately, ready with an explanation, and I could hardly come up with one
on the spot with the war drums pounding in my ears. “It’s complicated,” I said
dumbly.

“Do you know the
guy?”

“No,” I lied
impulsively. It seemed the proper thing to do. And Theo was going to wish I
didn’t know him, once I got my hands on his pretty hair and ripped it out of
his head. The thought of him on my mum’s doorstep! Filthy, blood-sucking…

“Did you get
mugged and thrown in a coach?”

I shook my head,
setting thoughts of Theo aside for the moment. “No.”

Jeremy leaned
back, frowning thoughtfully at his mug. “Huh,” he concluded. “Well, good.” He
lifted his mug for a long swallow.

Would I still be
friends with Jeremy, once I turned into a vampire? I sneaked looks at his
intelligent face, his large green eyes and slightly hawkish nose. In the past
few months I’d often puzzled over the fact that I’d fallen so hard and fast for
Merrick, but I’d never had such a thought about Jeremy. Love was funny.

After a long and
wonderful afternoon conversing with my old friend, we parted with warm goodbyes
and I set off for uptown.

As I walked, I
thought of all the things I wished I could ask Merrick, but was too afraid to.

Foremost in my
mind was whether I’d have to leave my mum behind when I became a vampire. As
far as I could tell, my appearance wouldn’t change much. I supposed my eyes
would turn strange, like Merrick’s and Theo’s. And my skin might get prettier.
That was all right. Mum wouldn’t mind all that, would she? I was thinking I
could come up with some excuse for the eyes, maybe blame it on a medical
condition.

Then there was the
killing. That was worrying me a fair amount. How often would I have to kill?
Was it absolutely necessary? Could I not drink from cows, or sheep? If not, I
supposed I would have to get used to it – but I dreaded it. I wanted to ask
what it was like to take a life, if one got used to it, or if it felt natural
once it was a matter of survival, perhaps.

Sometimes when I
thought about the whole thing too much, it stopped feeling real. For, truly, it
was all a bit hard to swallow! I was to become an immortal? I was to live for
centuries? I was to become like Merrick and Theo, those powerful, beautiful,
otherworldly creatures who wandered the world drinking the blood of thousands
upon thousands upon thousands?

And one day, like
Merrick, I was to fall into a deep despair and be compelled to choose a human
to transform into a creature like me?

How absurd it all
was.

But I could not
simply share my worries with Merrick. I knew he was against the whole thing,
and I was worried if I revealed my anxieties he would somehow find a way to
skirt the deal we’d trapped him in, in some overblown effort to save my human
life.

Well, at least
Theo and I had him under control for now.

Theo. My blood
began to boil. My mother’s house! That evil, vile snake. What if he had been
hungry? I clenched my fists at the thought.

But when I reached
the door of the handsome wooden house, knowing Merrick was most likely inside,
my anger faded into the background. It was always like that. Nothing brought a
smile to my face like the thought of seeing Merrick.

Most of the house
was kept dark with heavy velvet drapes, but Merrick insisted upon keeping a few
rooms on the North side light and airy for me to relax in. There was nothing
ostentatious about the house, but it was fine and comfortable, and far enough
removed from my own humble roots that I was still moved by the fine polished
floors and the elegant upholstered furniture.

I found Merrick in
the upstairs study, writing at his desk. “Hello, William,” he said warmly,
without turning.

I crossed the room
and took a seat in the chair near the window some feet from him, where I could
see his face. The drapes were parted slightly to let in a sliver of the soft
afternoon light. I peeked through the gap, looking down at the streets below.
This far north, Manhattan was green and peaceful. Nothing like our neighborhood
on the lower east end of the city, where the clamor of wheels and voices never
stopped.

Merrick caught my
eyes and smiled before looking back at his page. “Have you eaten?”

“Not yet.” I
watched his hand move swiftly back and forth across the paper, enjoying the
soft scratching of the quill.

He nodded. “Lidiya
will prepare something for you. How is your mother’s cooking, William?”

“It’s heavenly.”

He smiled again.
At last he finished his letter and set his quill aside. He turned in his chair
and leaned forward with his elbows on his knees. “What did you pick up today?”

I lifted my
satchel and withdrew the two wrapped books, holding them out to him.

He raised his
eyebrows, taking them. “May I?” At my nod, he set them upon the desk and untied
the twine from one. Once he’d lifted it from the wrapping paper and taken in
the cover, he looked at me. “Why did you choose this one?”

I blinked at him
for a moment before I realized he was not questioning my judgment, but asking
out of interest. Surprised, I stood up and went to his side, putting my arm on
the back of his chair and leaning over him to point out the special details of
the book. “This is a first edition,” I said. “See? It’s very rare, because the
first copies caused uproar and publication was stopped. Some of these rhymes
were deemed unfit for children…”

He listened and
asked questions, letting me explain all the details I’d considered in acquiring
the volume and how I’d negotiated the price. It warmed my heart with pride to
hear his interest and to share with him something I knew well.

When I had wrapped
the book back up, he pulled me down and softly kissed my lips. “Are you pleased
to be back in the city?” he murmured.

“I’m pleased you
are with me,” I replied. I gazed upon his handsome face for a moment. “Are you
well, sir?”

He smiled
slightly, as he always did when I called him that. It had proved so difficult
to break the habit that I had given up and told him to take it as a nickname.
“Yes,” he said. “It is easier here.”

I nodded. It was
impossible for me to understand the temptation he struggled with, particularly
since I could not quite imagine that my blood was
quite
so tempting. But
I had put a few things together regarding the move to the city. Most telling
was the fact that his eyes seemed brighter than ever, and his face held more
color. I could only assume he was drinking much more often than he had ever
been able to in that forest cottage, and I imagined it contributed to how
comparatively relaxed he seemed now with me. I tried not to imagine who he was
killing.

After dinner,
Merrick went out for a spell. I lingered in the house for awhile, reading, and
then left for a walk.

“You’ve certainly
lasted longer than I expected.”

My lips curled as
I turned to face Theo.

“Stubborn bastard,
isn’t he – whoa!” Theo threw his hands up in surrender as I stormed over to him
and grabbed him by the lapels, shoving him against the wall.

“I should break
your neck!” I hissed.

He laughed,
incredulous. “What have I done?”

“Did you go to my
mother’s house?”

“
Oui?
Why
do you ask?”

I slammed him
against the wall. “Stay away from her!”

He glanced over
his shoulder, grimacing faintly. “How clean is this wall?”

“Hey!”

“Yes!
Merde,
I didn’t even sniff her neck. Wished I had, later. Lovely woman, your
mother...” He held up his hands again at my growl. “All right, all right! No
paying visits to the boy-thing’s mother, I get it!”

I let him go,
fuming, though it seemed he was getting off easy. I wished I were a more
violent sort. And, of course, that Theo didn’t outmatch me by laughable degrees
by virtue of his damned immortal strength.

Theo turned. “Is
there dust on my back?”

“Just bird shit.”

He peeled off the
jacket as quickly as he could, horrified. “Ass,” he sniffed when he found I was
lying, and slung the jacket over his shoulder. “So? How’s the master of the
house? Still fighting back his urges, I see?”

“I suppose so.”

“Well, it is
easier to calm the appetite here.” Theo lifted his head, breathing in the cool
late summer breeze. “New York. It’s not so bad. So, where are we off to?”

“You’re mad.”

“Oh, don’t play
games. I know you’re dying to talk to me.”

“You’re truly
mad.”

“Not so, young
morsel. I’m much more intuitive than you think, as you’ll learn well when the
time comes.” He put his arm lightly around my shoulders and gently led me
toward the street. “Let’s walk, shall we?”

I gingerly removed
his arm, sighing, but followed along. He was right. I was much too curious to
pass up a chance to converse with Theo, no matter how much he irritated me.

“Are you afraid?”
Theo asked.

“Of what?”

“Becoming a
creature of the night, silly boy.”

“No.”

“Come, now.”

“Were you afraid?”

“Me?” Theo
laughed. “No! I begged for it.”

“Why?”

“Because I wanted
to live forever.”

I thought about
that one. “Did you ever regret it?”

“Regret can kill
you. And what’s to regret? I’m living forever.”

“And what about
killing, you never regret that?”

“Ah, well.” Theo
brushed something from his shoulder. Then he grinned at me. “You see? I knew
you wanted to talk to me.”

“So? What about
killing?”

“Why don’t you ask
Merrick?” Theo’s grin widened, and then he shook his head. “I jest. You poor
thing, you are lucky to have me around.”

“How on earth do
you figure that?”

“Because Merrick
will be a lousy teacher. He’s too ashamed of us.”

“Ashamed of who?”

“Vampires!” Theo
said impatiently. “
Merde,
I thought you were supposed to be smart.”

I pressed my lips
together, wanting to sock him. Oh, well. “Why is he ashamed of vampires?”

“There’s not a
thing about it that doesn’t shame him. He’s ashamed of the killing, ashamed of
the blood he takes to feed his own, ashamed of the pleasure it gives him,
ashamed of his own beauty.”