Mia's Spanking Diary (9 page)

“One more.”

As I released the last breath, he shoved his cock into my
virgin ass. The pain returned. His cock was larger than the vibrator by a lot.
I clenched my jaw tight, and my hands curled into fists.

Lex didn’t move another inch, but kept his dick deeply
seated inside my ass. “Hang on, baby. Breathe.”

Again, I obeyed him. It seemed that he knew my body better
than I did because after inhaling and exhaling a few times, I was aroused
beyond belief.

“There you go, little sub. You’re there, aren’t you?”

“Y-Yes, Sir.” I panted.

Then he plunged in and out of me with abandon. I was his.

“Take me, Lex!” I screamed, as my nerve-endings blistered
through me.

And for the first time, he seemed out of control, lost to
his own passion. I’ve never been more lost and thrilled to be with someone than
that moment with Lex.

“Fucking your ass, Mia. Your virgin ass. So fucking tight.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.”

Each syllable matched his strokes. In and out. Faster and
faster. The drums still played from the hidden speakers, adding to the
intensity of him fucking my ass.

His pounding continued, but I knew he was close, thankfully,
as my own orgasm was about to turn me into a complete and utter livewire.

I clenched my ass as tight as I could around his dick.

“
Fuck
!” He yelled. I could feel his dick shoot its
hot liquid.

He reached around me, applying pressure to my throbbing clit
with his fingers. I’d been on the edge, but his stimulation on my bud of nerves
worked to plummet me over the cliff.

“Yesssss...God...Oh...God...Yes. Yes. Yes.”

I banged on the desk with my bound fists as a flood of
sensations drowned me, and my womb convulsed again and again. Tears streamed
down my face and my heart raced in my chest.

“That’s my baby. Ride that orgasm.” He began stroking my
back, which fired off more tingles inside me.

We stayed in that very position, his dick in my ass and me
bent over the desk, for what seemed an eternity until my climax slipped into a
delicious hum.

Lex undid the belt around my ankles, and took off the tie
from my wrists. Then he removed the scarf from my eyes. He flipped me around to
face him, and I stared into the most beautiful blue eyes in the world.

“Mia, you get an A. You’ve passed the course.”

“I did?” The words came out of my mouth in a languid stream.
I felt so good. Complete.

Lex leaned in and kissed me deeply, passionately, sending his
tongue past my lips and into my mouth.

More tears than I thought possible fell from my eyes. This
man had taken me to places inside myself that I’d never known existed. He’d
agreed to let me, the little grad student at the lecture, come to his club for
a test. I’d passed. What now? Was this our last time together? Was this
goodbye?

My heart was breaking in two as he ended our kiss.

“What’s the matter, sweetheart?”

I couldn’t find the courage to tell him my fears. The truth
would kill me. “Lex, you say I passed. Will you let me interview you now?”

His eyebrows shot up. “That’s all that’s troubling you?”

“Yes,” I lied. “What do you say?” If he agreed to an
interview, then maybe there was still hope for me to be with him after all.
Maybe.

“I don’t like lying, Mia.” By his tone, I knew he was not
happy with me.

“Please, Lex. Ask Dr. Vickers. I need to work on my thesis.”

“Okay. You’ll get your interview. Tomorrow night. I have
something I want to discuss with you, too.”

****

I just closed my laptop. All the questions for Lex are
ready. But there’s so much more I want to ask him.

I just can’t let myself think tomorrow might be the end of
my time with Lex. I’m in too deep. What a mess.

I love him. It’s true.

My heart will never survive.

Diary, I’m still reeling about what happened during the
interview with Lex. Let me start at the beginning.

As before, I was driven to the club in a limo. It was noon,
so the place was closed. We were all alone at The Cell. He escorted me to his
private office. The decor was quite sparse, with a modern edge. There was a
desk, a table and chairs, open shelving, and a large whiteboard at the back
wall.

“Sit there.” He pointed to one of the chairs next to the
table.

I nodded, and took a seat. Then I took out my laptop from my
satchel and fired it up. I clicked on the interview doc I’d created for this
moment.

Lex sat in the chair opposite mine. “You about ready to get
this underway, Mia?”

“One more second, please.” I finished entering the information
about date, time, place, and Lex’s full name. Then I looked up from my laptop
and found him gazing at me with his lips curled up ever so slightly.

Clearly, he was amused by my nervousness, which instantly
set me on edge.

Lex had told me last night that he wanted to talk to me
about something immediately after my interview with him. I hadn’t slept fearing
what he wanted to discuss since leaving him last night. I knew from Viv and Dr.
Vickers that he’d steamrolled through many women. Why in the hell did I think
he would see me any differently? Feeling the hot blood in my face, I looked
back at my screen with the questions I’d prepared for him. But these weren’t
the real questions I wanted to ask.

I took a deep breath. “Let’s get started.”

He looked utterly comfortable, and I was a wreck. “I’m
ready. Give me your best shot.”

“How old are you?” I sounded so idiotic.

“Going for the jugular, Mia?” He chuckled. “Thirty-two. My
birthday is March twenty-ninth, if you want to give me a card or a present. I
have something in mind I’d really enjoy from you.”

My anxiety grew as my heart was ripping apart. “Are you
going to take this seriously or not, Lex? You promised you would.”

He smiled. “Go on.”

Was this it? Were these my last moments with him? No more lessons.
No more spankings. No more kisses. I tried to clear my thoughts but couldn’t.
He’d agreed to my interview. He wanted to hear logical questions from me. I
recalled my blubbering performance on the day I’d met him in the lecture hall.
If I wasn’t going to see him again, I would at least like to think he would
remember me as having a brain in my head.

I forced myself to speak calmly. “How long have you been
practicing BDSM?”

His eyebrows shot up. Was he seeing into me? Reading my mind
once again?

Lex moved his gaze to my fingers, which were trembling. “Ten
years.”

I placed my hands in my lap and stared back at my screen. I
was having so much trouble thinking clearly. “So, you were twenty-two?”

“That’s right.”

I tried to imagine him at that age. He must’ve been quite
the knockout on campus. But I wasn’t sure if he’d gone to college. I felt
completely muddled. Why couldn’t I find the courage to ask him what I really
wanted to know? But did I even know how to ask? I didn’t. So instead I
continued with the questions I’d prepared. “What’s the highest level of
education you’ve completed, Lex?”

“I have my MBA. Does that surprise you?”

“Not really. You own a successful business and run it quite
well from what I’ve seen.”

His eyes narrowed. “You haven’t seen everything, Mia.”

No, of course not. I wasn’t sure I had the courage to ask
him to show me, no matter how badly I wanted it. I was on uneven ground with
him.

Lex had all the advantages. “You have another question, or
is the interview over?”

“Yes.” I read off the next question from the survey on my
laptop. “Are you single, married, divorced, or...um...in a committed
relationship?”

I glanced back at him and found his stare fixed on me.
Immediately, I looked back to my screen. Was there a woman in his past that had
heard this all before? Jealousy sank its claws into my neck as I realized he
might even have someone in his life right now. I might’ve just been a little
plaything, the latest distraction for him. But trying to pry information out of
such a man wasn’t something I could risk.

“Umm. Let’s table that one for now.” My thoughts were
jumbling up.

Lex’s face darkened. “You really want to table that
question, Mia?”

The hurt I felt was like a weight on my heart. Once we were
done here, would I lose him for good? Probably. Tears stung the back of my
eyes. I screamed inside my head to tell him how I felt, what I feared. But my
screams went unheeded. I couldn’t find my voice to tell him everything—or
anything. Plus, I was afraid of what he might answer. Once again I looked at
Lex, the man who had shown me so much and captured all of my heart.

My eyes brimmed with tears, but thankfully my voice remained
steady. “Yes. Your personal life isn’t important for my thesis.”

His fists came down on the desk with a bang, taking me
aback. “You’re pissing me off.”

“What? Why?” What had I done to get him so angry? I was
angry, too. At least a part of me felt that way. I was also devastated and
brokenhearted. And more. But that wasn’t what he wanted to hear from me. I closed
my laptop, hoping that would please him. “This better?”

“That’s enough!” He came around the table and grabbed me by
the shoulders. “I’m not putting up with this crap from you, sub. Do you
understand?”

“N-Noo, Sir. I-I don’t understand.” Logic failed me. I’d
done something wrong, but what? What could I say that he wanted to hear? “You
don’t want to do the interview? Then we won’t do it, Lex.”

He lifted me off the chair. He sat and pulled me over his
lap. It took him less than a second to jerk my slacks down. “Fucking panties.
Did I not text you today and tell you that you’re not allowed to wear panties?”

I’d ignored his instructions, thinking there was no lesson
or scene tonight with him. “Y-Yes, but—”

“Quiet.” Lex didn’t pull my panties down but instead ripped
them to shreds with his bare hands. “You told me you trusted me, sub. Was that
a lie?”

I’d never seen him so angry, and it frightened me. “I’m
mixed up, Sir. I-I...things aren’t...”

Whack! Whack! Whack!

The strike of his hand to my ass stung more than ever
before. Unlike his previous spankings, this was real punishment.

“Did. You. Lie. To. Me?” Lex’s indignant tone made me
tremble.

My voice seemed to be paralyzed. The pain of his hand to my
ass was unpleasant, but not even close to the pain I felt for displeasing him.

What could I say that would make him okay with me? I meant
it when I said before that I trusted him, but now, I wasn’t so sure. I wanted
to, but this was clearly the final goodbye. That would leave me destroyed and
lost. So I remained silent.

Whack! Whack! Whack! Whack! Whack!

Each smack brought my shame to the forefront of my mind.
Tears streaked down my face. I wouldn’t be able to sit comfortably for some
time after this, but I didn’t care. I deserved his wrath, all of it. He’d done nothing
wrong. I was the one who’d led with my heart into our scenes together, not him.
There’d been no promises from Lex. I’d let myself fall when he’d only done what
he’d promised. He’d been my teacher, opening me up to my true self. Nothing
more.

Whack! Whack! Whack!

He stopped spanking me and changed my punishment to painful
pinches to my ass. I sobbed and sobbed. The truth...he deserved to hear all of
it, no matter if he hated me for it.

The torture stopped abruptly.

Lex stood up, hoisting me to my feet. My slacks pooled
around my ankles as I covered my face with my hands, unable to bear looking at
him.

“Look at me, little sub.” His voice was softer than earlier.

I obeyed, lowering my hands even though I knew my eyes were
swollen and puffy.

He glared at me. “Answer me, not with what you want me to
hear, but the actual truth. Now.”

“Y-Yes, Sir.” As more tears fell from my own eyes, I was
finally clear about how I really felt about him, and I found the courage to say
it. “I-I do trust you, Lex. I really do. But I was afraid to be open and honest
with you today.” Each syllable I uttered tore my heart apart, but holding back
from him wasn’t possible. Not now. Not after all he’d done for me. “You’ve
helped me discover so much, and not just about my paper, but about me. I know I
shouldn’t want more from you, but God help me, I do. It’s not fair to you. You
made no promises to me. And it’s my mistake that I’ve surrendered not just my
body but also my mind, my dreams...m-my...very life. I-I’m...to blame...for...”

I couldn’t go on and once again placed my face in my hands.

Lex lifted me up in his arms and squeezed me against his
chest. I whimpered until no more tears fell.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. I’m here.”

I rubbed his chest and looked into his eyes, “For how long?”

“That’s my girl.” He pressed his forehead against mine and
stared directly into my eyes. “Don’t ever hold back from me again.” He kissed
me, and I gasped a little moan of surrender into his mouth. “You can always
tell me what you’re most afraid of. But hold back again and I’ll have to punish
you. Neither one of us wants that. Right?”

I shook my head.

“Now, let me tell you my truth. I went to my first club with
some buddies my senior year in college. We all had a blast, but I found a life.
It was like the blinders were off, and I knew myself for the first time.”

“Lex, I—”

“Shh. Let me finish. I’ve been looking for you ever since
that first night all those years ago. The moment I saw you at the lecture hall I
felt the connection. Hell, more than that. Sure, I’m an experienced Dom and
have trained my share of subs, but none of them are like you. This isn’t some
pain-trip for you like so many who use the life to repair some hurt from the
past. Not a bad thing, I suppose, but not the kind of sub I want by my side.
You’re what I need, baby. I get you. Your very nature is to please and to
surrender. Mine is to control. I can’t deny that. And I fucking crave your
total trust.” He kissed me again, and my toes curled.