Miriam's Secret (12 page)

“You must not say such things!” Miriam squeezed
Daett
's hand even tighter. “I love you,
Daett.
”

“I will say them.”
Daett
squared his shoulders. “They are the truth. And I did need a humbling. Come, let us tell
Mamm
. This will be a great load off her shoulders. I know the burden of the coming little one has lain heavy on her heart, and she will be pleased that we've settled this problem. And having a bit more wealth won't hurt us, I guess.”

Miriam followed
Daett
out of the barn and across the lawn. He gave her a smile as he opened and held the front door for her.

Chapter Eleven

S
hirley sat on the couch with a serious look on her face as she listened to her family discussing Mr. Bland's gift to Miriam. She was glad for Miriam, Shirley told herself. She really was, but what a shocking surprise. And
Daett'
s acceptance of the gift was the biggest surprise.
Yah
, he claimed repeatedly the farm would be Miriam's once she married, but in the meantime he planned to farm Mr. Bland's old place. Well, at least the family wouldn't be so poverty stricken now. She was glad for that.

In the meantime, her fresh resolutions since Monday night not to call Jonas again had drifted ever further away. This news didn't help. If Miriam had a farm she could move on to once she married, where would that leave Shirley and the rest of the family? In the same place there were right now—poor! She didn't need that reminder at this crucial moment of temptation. Yet there it was. Poverty was still staring her in the face.

She shouldn't be bitter, Shirley chided herself. And she didn't
want to be. But then she needed to look after her own interest too, which just might include Jonas Beachy. She would call him and see if he would pick her up from home sometime soon. Shirley's heart beat faster at the thought.
Yah
, she felt a lot less guilty about calling him now.
Daett
certainly wouldn't think her logic made any sense at all, but then he wasn't a girl who had to look forward to living life on a shoestring all alone. A better life might lie out there beyond the horizon. Not necessarily with Jonas, of course, but finding more for her life was the thought that counted at the moment.

Shirley got up and slipped into the kitchen. No one noticed as the chatter continued. Lee and Mark could hardly control their excitement as they talked of how they would start work on Mr. Bland's place. Even
Daett
seemed caught up in the joy, although a look of sorrow had crossed his face briefly as she walked past.
Daett
would struggle mightily with this change in the family fortune, Shirley knew.

“This is the will of the Lord as He humbles me,”
Daett
had told them as he explained his decision. “I have taken great pride in my ability to make it on my own, so I now must accept what He has given to Miriam through Mr. Bland.”

After a few minutes in the kitchen, Shirley continued on to the washroom. She opened the door and stepped outside. If she went past the living room window, her family would see her. They'd wonder what she was up to…and notice her going down the road. Then they'd call after her. So, she would go to the barn first and then to the phone shack from there.
Yah
, that was sneaking around, but she couldn't help herself.

Shirley hurried toward the barn. Would Jonas agree to pick her up? She wouldn't dare ask him outright, but perhaps he would offer again. Maybe she could drop a hint. If not, then no
one needed to know she'd called him. If she hurried she could be back before her family missed her.

Shirley entered the barn and went out through the barnyard door. From there it was a short jaunt across the pasture to the road. Several minutes later she arrived out of breath at the phone shack. She dialed the number and held the receiver to her ear as she waited. The last thing she needed was for Jonas to think she was overly eager. She quickly cleared her voice before Jonas answered.

Jonas's voice was cheerful enough. “Shirley, I was hoping you'd call.”

“How did you know it was me?” Her voice trembled.

Jonas chuckled. “Modern technology. Caller ID. The number shows up on my phone. I figured it had to be you unless your father was calling…to chew me out.” Jonas's chuckle wasn't quite as hearty this time.

“Oh, no!” Shirley gasped. “I'd never give
Daett
your number. And
Mamm
knows I talked with you on Monday night.”

“Then all's aboveboard.” His voice brightened. “So what's up?”

What should she say? She had to guide him toward asking her out, but how? “Well, there was also a surprise at our house this week. The old man that Miriam used to work for—Mr. Bland—well, he died and left her his farm.”

“That's interesting,” he said.

He didn't sound too impressed, Shirley thought. But then a “little” farm probably wasn't much in his world. Shirley went on, “It's complicated and the family is all talking about it. I slipped out to call you.”

Jonas didn't hesitate. “I'm glad you did, but we have to develop a better communication system. In the first place, I'm the one who should be calling you.”

Shirley heard the pleasure in his voice and forced herself to breathe. “There's only this phone to call you with. And I can't stay here very long…much less wait here. In fact, I should already be going back.”

“Maybe we can use carrier pigeons?” he teased.

Shirley laughed. “We don't have carrier pigeons. I'm just an Amish girl, you know. Difficult communication is how we live.”

“I was joking,” Jonas said. “You know my parents used to be Amish way back when, even before I was born. I wouldn't say I'd want to live like that, but you obviously like it.”

Shirley tried to calm the racing of her heart. She didn't know what to say so she settled for “It's okay, I guess—if I can call you once in a while.”

Jonas laughed. “I have no problem with that. I enjoy your calls. Probably more than you do!”

On that you're very wrong
, Shirley almost said, but that would be inappropriate. She replied instead, “You're very kind. Thank you.”

She could almost feel his smile over the phone.

“You don't have to flatter me, Shirley, but you're welcome. So tell me, what are you doing tonight?”

Shirley's mind whirled. At the Yoder house, Saturday night was a time to wind down for the week, clean up, read a book perhaps, and go to bed early. Except when one was on
rumspringa
, as she was. Was this the opening she was hoping for…to see if he'd come and get her? Shirley gathered her courage. “Not much, really. What are your plans?”

“I have a movie I should watch.” There was a long pause.

Shirley clutched the receiver. “That's nice.”

“You should come watch it with me.”

Shirley tried to speak but nothing came out.

“Of course, I understand if you won't. Just sayin'.” His laugh was nervous. “I know you don't watch movies.”

“I…” Shirley managed. “I'd love to, but…” Here was her chance! Should she accept? Not really—yet, she must! How else would she get to see more of him?

“Maybe some other time?” He sounded hopeful.

“No!” The word came out a shriek, but Shirley rushed on. “If you'll pick me up, I'll come today! I'd love to come.”

“Really?” He sounded skeptical.

Had she said too much? Her fingers were numb from clinging to the receiver so hard. If Jonas ran fast in the other direction, she wouldn't blame him in the least. He didn't need Amish girls who clung to his every word.

Her silence didn't seem to bother him. “What if your father chases me off?”

So that's what he was worried about. Shirley almost smiled. She managed to answer in a calm voice. “I'll tell my parents you're coming, and I'll meet you at the end of the lane. There won't be any trouble. I am on
rumspringa
, after all.” That wasn't all true, but it was true in part.
Mamm
and
Daett
would have to accept her decision, just like they had to accept Miriam's decision to give them Mr. Bland's farm.

“See you at seven then.” His voice sent a thrill through her.

“I have to go now.” Shirley hung up the receiver and turned to race down the road and across the field again. By this time someone would have missed her, and they'd be on the lookout. She'd have to break the news of her plans at once. Tonight she would not only ride with Jonas in his fancy convertible, but she would spend significant time with him. It was almost more than her heart could handle. Who would have thought such a thing would ever come to pass? A stab of guilt ran through
her. What about her many resolutions and promises? Had they meant nothing? Shirley slowed down to catch her breath. She had to think of some answer because
Daett
would ask the same question.

Shirley pushed open the back barn door to find Lee and Mark just beginning their chores.

They stopped to stare at her. “So that's where you vanished to,” Lee said, more statement than question. “Who did you call?”

Shirley plunged into her explanation. “I'm going out with Jonas Beachy tonight.” She couldn't keep the chirp out of her voice. “We're watching a movie at his house.”

“Now I've heard everything!” Mark made an exaggerated gesture as he pretended to drop his pitchfork on the concrete floor. “This even tops Miriam's exploits. Maybe you and I are falling behind, Lee.”

“That's what I'm thinking.” Lee glared at Shirley.

“It's what I've wanted to do for a while.” Shirley met their disapproving looks straight on. “Don't worry, I'll behave myself.”

“Still making useless promises to yourself, I see,” Lee told her.

Shirley lowered her head and fled out the front barn door. Lee spoke the truth. She couldn't keep her promises. But she would somehow keep this one. She and Jonas wouldn't do anything wrong. Jonas was a decent man, after all, despite what her family thought. She took a deep breath as she slipped into the house. At the moment she had no desire for another face-down with anyone. If Lee could handle her so effectively, then how would she survive
Daett
's rebuke? Shirley's heart pounded as she entered the living room.
Mamm
was still sitting on the couch with Miriam beside her.
Daett
wasn't around, and hope rose inside of Shirley. She could tell
Mamm
without
Daett
here. But just as Shirley opened her mouth to spill the news,
Daett
came out of the bedroom.

He regarded her for a moment. “Where have you been, Shirley?”

There was only one answer she could give. To lie wasn't an option. “I called Jonas Beachy. He's picking me up tonight at seven. We're going to watch a movie.”

Mamm
let out a little gasp, and
Daett
seemed to grow a shade paler. He didn't say anything for a long moment. “Has this anything to do with the news earlier in the day?”

What was she to say? She didn't want to blame Miriam or dash cold water on the family's climb out of poverty.

Her silence was answer enough, and
Daett
's face grew even more serious. He raised his eyes and sighed before praying, “Dear Lord, help us. These are troubled waters that I can never travel alone.”

She wanted to throw her arms around
Daett
and promise she'd never see or speak with Jonas again, but she knew that wouldn't help because she wouldn't follow through. She was still going out with Jonas tonight, no matter what. “I'm sorry,
Daett
,” she managed.

He didn't say anything. He turned and left the house without a backward glance.

At least the door didn't slam behind him, Shirley comforted herself. Oh, if this wasn't the right thing to do, what sorrow she was bringing on her family. While
Mamm
and Miriam sat in silence, Shirley breathed her own silent prayer.
Help me, dear Lord! Please help me.