Moon White: Color Me Enchanted with Bonus Content (12 page)

I decide to go up and see if Augustine has taken over the attic, and to my surprise my little clearing in the back is still there. Surrounded by the walls of boxes that Mom helped me stack is a wonderful secret place. Even the old pole lamp is still there, and it works. This secluded spot feels perfect. Well, other than some dust bunnies and spider webs, which I take care of. It takes three trips to haul everything up there, and it’s not long until I have it all arranged and it looks really cool. Not only that, but it feels better. It
feels right. I’ve placed an old Oriental carpet on the floor under my toy chest, which I covered with the altar cloth. On top of that is my statue of Isis and some candles and several of my favorite fairy figurines and other things. I light some candles and incense and move an old rocking chair near the pole lamp. Then I sit down and read for a while. Then I write for a while. And slowly yet surely, things start to make sense again.

There is a definite reason they call this religion a craft or a practice. I can see that it requires time and skill and learning and discipline. Today I focus on the Rule of Three. It’s an ancient Wicca law that means whatever you do will be returned to you threefold. If you do good, you will receive three times as much good back. If you do evil, well, watch out! Of course, I’m trying to think of ways I can apply this principle to get Hudson back, since I’m fairly sure that I’m losing him. But other than making a new love potion, which I may or may not do, I have no ideas. And I have a feeling that the Rule of Three does not apply here. I think I need to put this guy out of my mind for the time being. I think the distraction is only stealing my good energy anyway. Still, it’s hard. Truth: I’m not sure how to overcome it.

Finally, I think I’ve had enough study, and it’s getting a little claustrophobic up here, so I decide to go to the WC for a Chai tea. I consider calling Liz, but I’m not entirely sure I want to see her. And when I check my cell phone on my way out to the car, I suppose I’m a little surprised that she hasn’t called me.

Town seems pretty quiet today, typical for a Sunday when tourist season is pretty much slowing down. I order my Chai and go sit down at a table. I’ve brought along my Book of Shadows as well as one of my other books. I’m just starting to read when I hear someone say my name.

It’s Sienna. She’s wearing a brown coat that reaches nearly to her ankles, but she is smiling at me. “Want any company?” she asks as she blows the steam from her coffee.

“Sure,” I tell her, although I’m not so sure that I want to be seen sitting here with her. Not that anyone is looking. Then I remind myself of the Rule of Three and figure I better be nice to her. Besides, those eyes of hers remind me of Mom again.

“That’s a good book,” she points out.

“Yeah, I like it.”

“So you really are taking it seriously then?” She sips her coffee.

“Sure,” I tell her. “Why wouldn’t I?”

“Well, for most girls your age, it starts out as a fad. Or maybe something that gets a reaction from their friends.”

“I don’t really care what my friends think,” I tell her. “Besides my ex-best friend, I’ve always been sort of a loner anyway. And she and I seem to be parting ways. She’s kind of a religious freak.”

“Some girls get into Wicca as a way to rebel against their parents.” She peers at me now as if she’s trying to see beneath my skin.

I sort of laugh at this. “You obviously don’t know much about
my
family.”

“Are you saying they’re okay with this?”

I shrug. “Yeah. In fact, my stepmom is very supportive, and my dad’s so wrapped in this big case that he doesn’t have time to notice.”

She nods. “So you’re doing it for yourself then?”

“Pretty much so.”

“Good for you.” She takes another slow sip, then studies me. “Mind if I ask what kind of big case it is that your father is involved in?”

I shrug again. “Everyone in town knows about it,” I say. “His firm
represents the opposition to the development of Yaquina Lake.”

Her brows lift as if she’s impressed. “Your dad is Vince Sinclair?”

I smile. “That’s him.”

“Of Sinclair, Lewis, and Dey?”

“Yep.”

“Well, my hat’s off to them for helping to save the lake.” She smiles. “I knew there was more than just one reason that I like you, Heather. I can sense these things. It’s obvious you come from good people.”

I’m not really sure how to respond, but I thank her.

“What about your stepmom, what does she do?”

So I tell her about Augustine’s art, and once again Sienna is impressed. “I’ve met Augustine,” she says with interest. “I went to one of her shows last summer. She’s really good.”

I nod. “Yeah, I know.”

“And your mother died?” she says in a somber tone.

“Yes.” I study her for a moment. “How did you know that?”

“I can feel the sadness around you, Heather.”

“Really?” I divert my gaze from her eyes.

“Yes. From the moment I met you, I sensed an aura of sorrow.” She sighs. “I’m sorry for your loss. How long has it been?”

So I tell her a little about my mom, how she was diagnosed with cancer when I was about nine and how she went through radiation and chemo and even some unconventional treatments but still died four years later.

“And when did your dad remarry?”

“Just a few months ago.”

“And you’re okay with Augustine? I mean, she seems like a good person to me.”

“Yes. I like her.”

“But you miss your mother?”

“Well of course.” I look away again.

“And you’ve been trying to contact her?”

I look back at her.

She pushes a strand of graying brown hair away from her face and then smiles. I think I can see kindness in her lined face, a softness in her eyes. Then I nod. “Yeah.”

“But you couldn’t get through to her?”

“No.”

“Do you want help?”

I consider this. I mean, a part of me desperately wants to reconnect with my mom, but another part of me doesn’t want to be disrespectful of her or even of her death. There’s no way I want to reduce the memory of my mom to a sideshow. “I’m not sure.”

“I understand,” says Sienna. “It’s not the kind of thing I would push on anyone. I just got a very strong sense one day during your ballet class. I felt you’d been trying to contact someone and failing. I didn’t know who, but the spiritual vibes were strong.”

So I tell her about the time I went outside at night and did everything that I’d read to try to reach my mom. I explain how the writer compared making a connection to using your cell phone, and the steps I’d taken. “But it didn’t work,” I finally say. “Maybe she just didn’t want to talk to me.”

“Or maybe you needed operator assistance.”

“Huh?”

Sienna smiles. “Sometimes your connection isn’t going through because you need some outside help. You might need someone with more experience, someone with objectivity and the ability to pick up on things you might miss. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

“But I’m not pressuring you, Heather. I just like you and want to make myself available to you. It’s hard being new in town, and I don’t exactly make friends easily.”

I remember the Rule of Three now and stick my hand out to Sienna. “Well, consider me your friend then, okay?”

She shakes my hand. “Thanks, Heather. I appreciate it.”

Then I’m not sure what gets into me, but I open up and I pour out the story of last night and bowling and how my special potion seemed to backfire. And to my surprise, Sienna begins to laugh. I’m sure I look slightly stunned by her reaction, especially after I trusted her with something so personal.

“I’m sorry,” she says, wiping her eyes with a napkin. “I’m not laughing at you, really, Heather. I just relate to your story. I remember doing something so similar to that once. Only I really made a total fool of myself.”

“Oh.” I guess that makes me feel just the slightest bit better.

She takes in a deep breath and seems to center herself. “And I’ve learned a lot since then. For instance, using any kind of love potion is usually unwise.”

“Why?”

“Because you want someone to love you for who you are, Heather. It’s not worth much if you charm them into it. Plus it can come back and bite you.”

“Yeah, I sort of thought of that. I guess I just felt desperate. I so wanted him to like me.”

“Well, I’m certainly no expert in the area of love and romance, but I suspect it’s easier to attract someone when you don’t appear to be trying too hard.”

“I know, I know.” I feel miserable. “I guess I just got caught up
in the idea of having some power over things.”

“Mostly you need to exercise the power over yourself, Heather.”

“I know that too.”

She nods. “Yes, we often know things in our heads, but our spirits are still learning.”

“I guess.”

“I’m sorry,” says Sienna suddenly. “I didn’t mean to lecture you.”

“No, that’s okay.”

“Well, before I go, I should tell you about a gathering that might interest you.”

“What’s that?”

“Some of us are getting together at Yaquina Lake this evening at sunset. We want to perform a ritual to help preserve the lake, to save it from development.”

“Who are
we
?”

“Just a handful of local people who understand the spiritual significance of this lake. Some environmentalists, some free spirits, and a handful of local Native Americans. It’s a very diverse gathering, but you’d be most welcome. We plan to meet at the dock at around six. The ceremony won’t be long, but hopefully it will help things. We’re all very concerned about losing this lake.”

I nod. “Yes. So am I. I’ll try to make it.”

“I’ve noticed that you’ve befriended the Daniels girl at ballet.” She gets a curious expression now. “How’s that going?”

I just shrug. “I’m not too sure.”

“Well, be careful, Heather. Bad connections can drain your spiritual energy.”

“What do you mean?” I study her dark eyes and wait.

“I mean, the wrong friends can bring the wrong energy. Sometimes you have to protect yourself.” She unexpectedly puts her hand on mine for a brief moment, and I stop myself from pulling away. But this gesture seems almost motherly. Then she stands and leaves. I stay a bit longer, pondering some of the things she said. I have to admit this strange woman is growing on me.

When I get home there’s a phone message from Dad and Augustine saying that they kept driving down the coast, “chasing whales” says Augustine. Consequently, they won’t be back until late. I take this as a sign that I should go to Yaquina Lake tonight. Perhaps this is another chance for me to practice the Rule of Three by giving of myself. Hopefully these little steps will improve my karma. No doubt I can use all the help I can get.

There are about a dozen or so people at Yaquina Lake and I’m definitely the youngest of the bunch, but Sienna greets me and invites me to stand by her. To my surprise, it seems she’s the one in charge. Her long, usually wild hair is twisted up in a bun, and she has a colorful scarf draped over the shoulders of her long brown coat. She actually looks fairly classy. As the sun sinks into the sky, we gather in a circle around a small fire. We burn candles and sage, and everyone takes turns blessing the lake, ending with some drumming music. One of the older Native American guys holds up his hands and speaks in what I’m guessing is his native tongue. And the whole thing is actually sort of cool and impressive, and I feel special to have been included. I just hope that this little event will help to preserve this lake. It really is a special place.

It’s getting dusky as we walk back to the parking lot. Sienna walks with me, thanking me for coming.

“Thanks for inviting me,” I tell her. “I’m really glad I got to come. I think my dad and stepmom would’ve liked it too, but they
drove down the coast to whale watch today.”

“Well, maybe we’ll do this again,” she says. “And hopefully with more people. But if we want our efforts to really have an effect, we must be careful to invite only those with a deep spirituality.”

I nod and pull my car keys from my pocket. “Yes. I can understand that.”

She pauses by my car. “Heather, I was thinking — after talking to you — and it occurred to me that you really need a guide or mentor. Perhaps you already have someone in mind, but I wanted to offer my services to you. I see such potential in you. Don’t answer me now, though. Spend some time thinking about it. And please, know that I won’t be offended if you choose another direction.” Then she reaches over and pats me on the shoulder. “Take care.”

I consider her offer as I go home. Maybe this is the path I’m supposed to take. I’ve certainly been frustrated and not exactly handling everything perfectly. Maybe Sienna really is my answer. Still, I won’t decide until I’m home, back in my attic corner, where I can really weigh this and think.

“S
OMETHING HAPPENED
,” L
IZ TELLS ME
M
ONDAY MORNING
. “I’
M NOT QUITE
sure how to explain it.”

“What?” I ask, distracted by my locker, which is refusing to open.