More, Please (16 page)

“We live in the same world, Logan.”

“We don’t. Yours is full of a future. Mine
is still sinking in the past.”

“So stop it. It’s not what Torres would
want. Or Crosby.”

My eyes narrow on her and I can’t help
the anger I feel toward her optimism. “Save your dogs, Allie. Don’t try to save
me. I’m not worth it.” My tone is biting and I hope it’s enough to drive her
away. I don’t care right now if I hurt her feelings. I’ll hurt her more if I
drag her into the nightmare I live in each day.

Grabbing my neck, there’s a fire in her
eyes that I’ve never seen before as she pulls my face down to hers.

“Fuck what you say, Logan.
I
think
you are worth it,” she says, and then presses her lips to mine fiercely.

My body feels like it’s been torched as I
spin her around, pinning her against my counter. “What do you think you’re
doing?”

Her teeth scrape against my chin as she moves
her mouth downward. “Bringing you back to my world.” Her breasts are pressing
against my chest and I can feel her nipples harden against me. My fingers drop
the photograph and find their way up to her head, tunneling through her hair
and grasping the back of her neck like I’m holding onto her for dear life.

I start to protest, but she’s pulling off
her t-shirt and I’m seeing skin that I need desperately to taste. My lips drop
to her delicate collarbone as I cup her breasts with my hands.

I shouldn’t do this. I know I shouldn’t. But
I also know that I desperately need to sink myself into her just to feel human
again.

~ ALLIE ~

My breath is ragged as he slips his hands
beneath my bra, and I’m covered in goosebumps from the feeling of his calloused
fingers swiping against my taut nipples.

I know this is the wrong way to get what
I want from him, and I can already imagine the regret I’ll feel afterward. But
right now, I’ve never felt more powerful than when I saw that lost look in his
eyes replaced by desire.

Never have I felt more like a woman than at
that moment, and it’s got me in heady stupor, my veins coursing blood to my
hormone-soaked brain. I reach down to feel the throbbing beneath the zipper of
his jeans and he pulls my hand away. I’m struck by disappointment, till he
reaches beneath my legs to lift me up.

I savor the taste of him as he carries me
upstairs and lowers me onto the bed. Standing above me, his eyes are full of
heat, and I know not to expect a sweet, gentle bout of sex from him right now.
If I wanted that, I should have initiated it some other time, back in that
hotel room maybe. Not at a time when the demons of his past have filled him
with fury.

He pulls off his shirt and I nearly gasp
at the sight of him. I’ve seen his muscles before, but it’s an entirely
different experience knowing that I’ll get to touch them, feel them sliding
against me skin-to-skin. I pull off my shorts and toss them to the side of his
bed and he does the same with his jeans.

I reach for the erection that is tenting
out from his briefs and he lowers his mouth to mine while I touch him. Teeth graze
against my tongue and I hear a moan that is more like a growl when I slip my
hand beneath the thin fabric and feel the supple, tight skin throbbing over
such hardness.

His mouth is moving to my breast, leaving
a damp trail of kisses along my neck. Freeing himself from his briefs, I feel his
cock pressing against me, urging for entry. Arching my back, I ache for more pressure,
and he senses my needs as his hand moves to my panties. I should be embarrassed
by how wet he’s made me, but I can’t feel anything but pleasure as he slips two
fingers past the fabric and enters me.

I cry out from pleasure instantly, my
body bucking beneath him, urging him deeper, wanting more contact. My muscles
quiver as his fingers open slightly, spreading me more. I come hard and
completely, and my pelvis is still rocking as his mouth moves lower on my body and
I feel his hot breath above the thin cotton.

He peels me free of the cloth and his
voice is thick with command. “Open your legs.”

I can’t think to deny him. I’d do
anything at this point to keep these sensations going. His lips meet my clit
and my vision glazes over from the feel of his tongue circling around my center
as his fingers move inside of me. I feel myself climbing up again, soaring
toward a climax that is still just outside of my reach, till one of his fingers
delves deeper, arching just so that it hits my most sensitive depths and I come
hard against his mouth.

“More,” I say as he climbs off of me, and
I am relieved when I see him pull a condom from his nightstand drawer. I
honest-to-God might have forgotten, desperate as I am to feel him inside me. He
sheaths himself quickly and I take a long look at his form above me. “You’re
huge,” I utter softly, and feel the heat of embarrassment sting my cheeks realizing
I said it out loud. But it’s true, he’s long and thick and it seems in perfect proportion
to his body.

My words seem to arouse him more, as he
plunders my mouth again so thoroughly my lips feel bruised.

There’s emotion in his eyes, and I don’t
know how to define it. Harsher than lust, fiercer than need—almost an
urgency steeped in anger. It scares me, and has my heart picking up speed as he
spreads my legs, but also makes me moist with desire.

“Say you want this, Allie.”

I feel a spike of terror flare through me
that he’s become just rational enough to stop. And I don’t want him to. I need
him inside me like I need my next breath.

“I want this. I want this.” I repeat it
over and over, even as he slides himself inside of me. He’s barely nudging into
me at first, and it’s not what I need. My fingers rake against his back, and I
pinch them into his skin as I pull him closer, urging him deeper.

His head gives a single shake as he
resists. “I could hurt you,” he says, and I know his words have more meaning
than just this one joining of our bodies, but I don’t care.

“Hurt me,” I say, grabbing his ass and
pulling him closer. He responds by entering me with a single thrust, so deep
that it does hurt, a spellbinding pain that I want to feel again even as he
slowly pulls out. My body yields to him as he thrusts again, pounding into me,
jarring against my womb and rocking my body against the sheets that are slick
with my sweat.

I’ve never felt a man this deep inside me
and it’s shattering me. My breathing is staggered and I’m certain my heart is
skipping a beat or two, trying to recover from the shock of his entry. My channel
spasms around him as I soar through a climax that has me seeing stars in the
back of my skull. I cry out his name and I feel my eyes tearing up, moist like
the rest of me.

“Are you okay, baby?” He’s staring at me
and I can tell the rage is subsiding, before I’m ready to see it go.

“I’m okay. It feels good, Logan. Don’t
stop. Please, don’t stop.”

He brushes a lock of hair off my face,
and I see a trace of tenderness in his eyes. Then more, as he kisses my jaw up
to my ear and whispers, “You’re so gorgeous when you come.”

I feel his tongue tracing along the outer
edge of my ear as he starts to move inside me again, slower this time, but just
as deep. His hand moves down my leg and he slides my thigh higher on his hip. My
other thigh follows, till my ass is arching upward with my legs wrapped around
him. The angle is a little different now, and I can feel his cock touch my G
spot on his next thrust. My eyes widen, and he smiles in response. “That’s it,
baby.” His words coax me up a spiral again, chasing pleasure, as I feel another
orgasm in my reach. I’ve never had sex like this and every cell in my body
seems overly receptive to his touch. I’m exhausted, and feel like there’s no
way I can have another, but the need is so great.

My eyes lower from his face to his abs,
to the tight V of muscles that leads to where we are joined together and the
sight of him inside me just about pushes me over the edge. One of my hands
moves from his back to his rippled chest and I feel the muscles moving
underneath his skin and he slides in and out of me. I rest my hand at his heart
and can feel its rapid beat beneath my fingers. The rhythm of it soothes me,
even as the feel of him pressing inside me has every muscle in my body tingling
and contracting.

His eyes are locked on mine as his
muscled arms hold him up from my body so that I’m not crushed, allowing me to
take in the sight of his remarkable form joined with mine.

I want to feel him shatter the same way I
did. I need to feel that—to know that the power I briefly possessed when
I tempted him into this is still mine. “Let me feel it,” I urge him. “I want to
feel you come, Logan. Now.” I try to make my voice demanding, but it’s not as
powerful as his was. But from the flare of passion I see in his eyes, I’m thinking
I might have won. He pulls one of my legs upward so that my calf is over his
shoulder. Then the other. I’m totally vulnerable to him now, my body so open to
his length that when he thrusts inside of me I cry out intensely. His body
stills at the sound of my gasps.

 “Don’t stop,” I demand, and revel in
the look of desire in his eyes as he takes me. I’m drunk off the sight of him
pounding into me. I know I shouldn’t get such a thrill from the look of his
body, but I can’t help it. I’ve never had this before, and I might never have
it again, and even that doesn’t dampen this feeling of wantonness that grips me
as he thrusts inside of me. His body glistens from sweat, accentuating the
shape of him and driving me upwards again into the heavens as a burning heat
pools at my center, building, building…

My body aches beneath him, muscles I
didn’t even know I had cry out, yet still the fire builds inside me with every
thrust. Till I finally feel myself come again, screaming out his name
shamelessly, my entry gripping him tighter with each spasm, till he joins me in
release with a final thrust.

His chest heaving, he gently moves my
legs back down to the bed. My body seems to protest as he pulls himself from me.

“Did I hurt you?”’

I want to lie and tell him he didn’t. But
I remember he said he never lies, and I want to honor that. “In the most
extraordinary way.” I smile as I say it, and I hope he takes my meaning.

His lips brush against my face—my
cheek first, then my nose, then my lips, resting there for a moment or two
before he slips from the bed. “I’ll be right back.”

The bed is damp and cold without him and
I long to beg him to come back. But I can’t assume that he wants more of me. I
offered myself to him as a distraction from his pain. And if the pain is gone,
I might not be what he needs anymore. The thought of that terrifies me.

I hear him in the bathroom, moving
around. The sound of water running. He might be showering, wiping himself clean
of the mistake he just made with me.

Oh, God, I hope it wasn’t a mistake. It
would devastate me. Even if I never get to have sex with him again, it hurts
even more to think he might not want to be my friend anymore.

I’m wallowing in my own thoughts,
negativity spiraling out of control as it always does with me in unfamiliar
situations. And this is completely unfamiliar. I feel tears dampen my eyes,
maybe from fear or shame or just an overwhelming feeling of loneliness at the
thought of losing him, when he comes back to the bed.

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

Damn, he notices everything.

“Nothing, I—” I want to tell him
that I’m not used to these situations and it scares me. I want to tell him… but
I can’t.

“You don’t have regrets, do you?” He lies
down next to me, pulling me to my side and resting his hand on my waist. His
touch is so tender, it slays me inside, letting him deeper into my soul.

“No. No, definitely not. I—I’m not
really…” My voice wavers. “I’ve only had one sex partner in my life. I’m not
really good at these things.”

There’s shock in his eyes, and there’s no
denying it. I know my average is damn low since my friends tease me about it
regularly. And I remind myself that just because I haven’t had a lot of sex in
my life, doesn’t change the act itself. It’s still just sex, and I shouldn’t
act like it’s a big deal.

But it
feels
like a big deal right
now, with nesting hormones surging through my veins uncontrollably and me just inexperienced
enough to not be able to control it. I don’t remember feeling quite this way
with Devin, even my first time. And that means that in the span of just a few
weeks, this man has crept closer to my soul than someone I supposedly loved for
over a year before he dumped me on my ass.

I can still remember the pain of that
rejection at a time when I needed him most. And if Logan means more to me than
Devin did, then I’m even more vulnerable.

I feel the fear inside me, making me
shiver as he pulls my naked body closer to his. He takes my hand and gives a
playful tug.

“Come on,” he urges as he stands, his hand
still joined to mine. “I thought a hot bath might be in order.”

My heart does a little happy dance as he
takes me into the bathroom and I see the steam rising from the soaker tub. I
remember the first time I saw this tub, and the thought of him in it with me has
fueled my fantasies on more than a few occasions. So the prospect of actually
fulfilling the fantasy has me just about passed out on the floor.

“You like baths, right?” he asks, dipping
his foot into the tub and leading me to join him.

“I love them. My condo only had a
stand-up shower.”

He tsk-tsks a little with a laugh. “That’s
a sin.” He slides down the back of the tub and moves me so that I am sitting facing
away from him, cradled between his legs. They are powerful, like the rest of
him. His calves are as thick as my thighs—and I’m no toothpick—and
corded with muscles that make me suspect he’s run a few marathons in his life.

Reaching for the bar of soap, he touches
his lips to my neck. I feel his erection coming to life behind me and it sends
my heart racing again. Sliding the soap across my chest, my nipples pucker at
the sensation. Then he rubs the soap in between his hands to a nice lather and
sets the bar to the side. His hands caress me, up my arms to my neck, down my
back, and again to my breasts. I inhale sharply as his touch journeys down my
belly, and one hand toys with my soft curls while the other softly slides along
my opening. I part my legs more, aching to have the feel of his flesh inside me
again, but he whispers, “Not now, beautiful. Rest now. I worked you too hard.” I
can feel his low chuckle vibrate against my back.

His fingers continue their sultry
massage, circling and teasing, but never penetrating my folds. “Please,” I beg,
unable to hold back.