My Expectation (My Escort Series Book 3) (5 page)

I
readied myself as I did my hair and make-up. A part of me wished Cassidy could be here to do them for me. She always took such pride in doing it and we used it as an excuse to catch up. After a few more heartbreaks in Manhattan, she decided to do some soul searching and had now deserted the city for six weeks. I often received a photo of her and some beautiful scenery somewhere in the world. I don’t think she had any real plans, she was just venturing to wherever it took her.

              A part of her had shattered while searching for love. She was a hopeless romantic and after being jarred so many times, she gave up and there was a part of herself she didn’t recognize. She asked for the time off at her receptionist role in Candice and Clive Magazine, my former employer, but was declined. Much to my shock with no responsibilities other than her job, she left her apartment and deserted her furniture with friends and left. It was very different to the high maintenance Cassidy everyone knew. I was happy for her, she needed to do this to find herself again. She was still in her early twenties and the world very much could be hers. She just had to build the confidence and self-love. She had for too long depended and valued her worth on the opinion of men.

              I straightened the last of my curls, spraying lightly over it in hope that it will stay. I reassessed how tight the dress was, self-conscious that I might’ve gained a few pounds since buying it. I watched myself in the mirror as I did a small circle to make sure I was happy with my appearance. I flexed my shoulders back and forth, it felt tight across my chest and I considered that I was doing too many push-ups alongside my cardio.

              “You look beautiful,” Damon said as he came from behind me and wrapped his hands around my waist. He looked at me through the mirror and I felt red flood my cheeks. He also looked ravishing. It sometimes shocked me that I had such a good-looking man as my boyfriend. He rested his hands on my stomach firmly and pressed as he kissed my exposed shoulder. “I don’t want to go out now and share you with the rest of the world,” he charmed.

              “Well, you can just be in suspense all night. If you play your cards right I might end up taking you home,” I teased. A cocky grin spread over his face as he pressed another kiss down my shoulder blade. The prickle of his facial hair tickled me and gave my body tingles all over. I arched into him loving the sensitive touch. I leant back towards him and he took my lips cupping my jaw. His hand raised my dress slightly in a teasing manner. I bit down on his lip.

              “Don’t rile me up,” I said promiscuously. He responded with a cheeky smile, which I couldn’t help replicate.

              “But I’m already riled up,” he growled in my ear. His hand raised slightly higher and I wanted to buckle underneath him. My heat pounded with anticipation and my breasts felt extremely sensitive to the possibilities that could occur.

              I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck, leaning firmer against him. His chest was so firm against my back. His hand continued to creep higher, much to my surprise that he could shuffle the dress further up. There was a part of me right now that wanted to be filled by Damon. My body radiated with that need. Within seconds my composed nature had left me and I felt like a sex crazed animal.

              His warm hand slipped into my lace underwear and his fingers began to rub. I arched firmly into him exposing my neck as he kissed down it gently, moistly and sweetly. His fingers continued to swirl which was putting me in instant ecstasy. I could feel him firm behind me and that I wasn’t the only one egging for this to happen. His hard shaft only made me more passionate to make love to him.

              He nibbled at my ear as he whispered, “You’re right Clover, if you play your cards right, you might get to take
me
home,” he said cockily. His hand slipped out of my lace panties and he pressed a firm kiss on my cheek with a laugh. I stood there baffled and disappointed. “Check mate,” he said again with another smile before stepping away as I tried to hit him playfully.

              “Are you serious?” I said oh so disappointed. I was throbbing for him, my body ached to have him inside of me. “We can be a little late,” I said with a charming smile. I walked over to him tugging on his collar. I kissed him deeply, my tongue ravishing him passionately. He walked me back into the counter pressing me up against the basin. I cupped his face interlacing my tongue and love for him in that very devoted kiss.

              There was something different about this kiss and intimacy. It was raw and passionate. I was hungry for him, more than I had ever been before. I wanted to dig my claws into him and play rough. I wanted him to fill me at my very core. This was a very greedy and primal love. He pulled away for a moment looking at me with lustful eyes. I knew it wasn’t my heart which only pounded in surprise of this domineering passion.

              He leant back into me more forcefully lifting up the dress which so tightly clung to my hips. I scrambled for his buckle taking it off and unzipping his pants. I edged closer towards him on the basin, not wanting to wait. I couldn’t. I wanted it hard, rough and painfully fulfilling. I wasn’t wet yet but wanted to feel the friction, I wanted to feel that pain that his size could inflict on me.

              As if knowing, he slipped aside the lace and pulled my hips towards him tilting me slightly into him. With no warning he slammed into me hard. It was both excruciating and erotic. He thrusted back and forth slowly, until he pounded into me hard.

              Moans had already begun to escape me as I arched back towards the mirror. It was painful and bliss. He kissed down my chest as I arched further loving the way that he filled me. I wanted more. I needed more. My nails dug into the side of the basin as I tried to gravitate myself to this earth.

              He thrusted into me hard again and a loud moan escaped me. His size filled me completely and I began to pool around him. I was on some sex crazed wildness as I let him completely dominate me and ruthlessly pound me. I wanted it more and harder. I was on a high for far too long, I don’t know how long I was riding the waves which came over me. My body shivered and flooded for him. I hadn’t realized how much of an itch I had to scratch until now.

              I was pressed hard against the mirror as the items which once surrounded me had rattled and fallen to the floor. That final wave of bliss began creeping closer and I took shallow breaths in anticipation before I climaxed.

              With one more thrust Damon was also in bliss, knowing that he was inside of me, satisfied and as hungry for me as I was him, was my undoing. I made a very feminine noise as I climaxed. We both pulsed together trying to calm our shaky breaths. I pressed my forehead to Damon with a smile. He kissed me gently with another smile.

              “I don’t know where that came from but I am certainly not complaining,” he said pressing another kiss to my lips. I tried to balm over my hair slightly in disbelief of the amazing sex that we had just had. The sex between Damon and me was always amazing. But everything was different tonight, more sensitive. He aided me in scooting off the basin and caught me as my knees buckled.

              “Did I hurt you?” He asked worried. I laughed as the room seemed to spin for a moment. My knees had utterly given way. I was stuck in that position for a moment before I could stand properly. My legs felt so weak.

              “No,” I laughed. Although I had to admit I was very sore. I looked around at the floor where my make-up and perfumes had smashed all over the place.

              “We better get going,” he said looking at his watch. We both locked eyes and there was still that glimmer of lust. We battled with the thought of staying in all night instead.

              “You’re right, we should go before we tear apart the entire apartment,” I smiled pulling him closer to me with a kiss. If I had the chance to claim him privately all night, I feared that we both had no chance of walking the next day.

T
he gallery was beautiful and I could appreciate both the wine and cheese just as much as the paintings. Damon walked around comfortably with his hand on my waist until he wandered off to greet sponsors. It intimidated me sometimes how well known he was and how great his network. He always introduced me to those he spoke too, but often let me wander on my own when at galleries. I simply found them entrancing as I looked at each piece, trying to decipher the concept.

              I stood in front of a large one that matched my own height. It was a woman naked on a horse with a spear, she led an army behind her. It was an array of only blacks, browns, greys and whites. The only non-neutral color was her blue, mystified eyes. I took a sip of my bitter red wine.

              The theme I had noted was forwarding feminism, something I felt very passionate about. As they say, we still lived in a man’s world and I challenged anyone who didn’t think women deserved equal rights. Someone stood beside me quietly admiring the painting.

              “It’s beautiful isn’t it,” the familiar voice said. It was Nae who wore a black simple dress and had plaited her hair. I didn’t realize how little and petite her frame was until now. She was very pretty in her own awkward way. She held a camera and a notepad under her arm.

              I looked back at the painting with admiration. “It is, do you like art?” I asked. We shuffled over to look at the second piece. Light music pooled around us with light chatter. The room was bright white with a few couches in the corners. It was a large circular room and in the center was the wine and cheese platters. It was a large space but because of the room’s roundness and odd architecture, it was seemingly squishy. I was grateful that Damon and I had arrived slightly late and most had stopped viewing the paintings and now networked. I looked over my shoulder where Damon was entertaining an older couple with his charming smile.

              “I do,” Nae said with awkward fondness. “I actually do sculptures myself. I am not as talented in painting and sketching, but give me some clay and I can make almost anything.”

              “Really? I would love to see them some time,” I said with a smile. She again shaded slightly red with a doting smile. I still wasn’t sure how old she was, but I had the sense that she looked up to me in an odd way. I was flattered by it.

              “You are Damon’s girlfriend aren’t you?” She asked. For someone who was so shy, she could be direct. I looked over my shoulder again at him and leant slightly towards her.

              “Only when he is being good,” I joked. She laughed with a very innocent glow.

              “Is it hard having a relationship with your boss?” She asked not reaching my eyes. I was a little shocked by her forwardness but continued to adapt to her personality.

              “He has only been my boss for the past six months. We stay professional and know our roles in the company. Just as long as he knows who the boss is at home,” I joked like some old housewife. She laughed again and was taking photos of the next canvas we walked to.

              “What about you, do you have a boyfriend?” I asked making light of the conversation.

              “No, I don’t have time. I want to only focus on my career. I think trying to find love is a waste of time,” she said openly. I smiled at her response.

              “I used to think the same,” I laughed finding it ironic.

              “So have you and Damon been dating publicly for a while?” She asked. I was aware of her interest in mine and Damon’s relationship and hesitated before I spoke.

              “We have, may I ask what all the questions are for?” I asked trying not to sound too guarded.

              Nae paused from taking the photos and looked at me as if realizing she had come off evasive. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to sound so direct. I am just intrigued, I mean the Brogardt family are well known and your relationship with him was somewhat big news that reached us in L.A., but I saw an article on him a few weeks ago which suggested he was a bachelor and still actively sought after. I was just wondering if it was like a celebrity gossip thing or if your relationship was sort of in the down low, or maybe you were friends and those who thought you were together misinterpreted.”

              I hesitated looking her way, because I knew I would’ve looked stunned. I took a large mouthful of my wine swirling it in my mouth slightly as I considered how to respond. The prickle of ill thoughts and accusations began to rise in my throat as I tried to push them down.

              “I try not to look into the gossip side of things. There’s been a few posts and articles about our relationship but I don’t read into them.”

              “That’s good,” Nae encouraged oblivious of the effect her words had on me. “I know heaps of people who couldn’t handle that or are misinterpreted for chasing money and career boosts only.” Her words were like daggers to my recent insecurities. “You are a really nice woman Clover, I am really happy to be under your care while I am in Manhattan. Thank you,” she smiled boldly. “I am going to go interview the artist, so I will talk to you later.”

              I waved her goodbye and fumed as I stared at the painting. I was more infuriated that these vile feelings so easily caught in my throat. I wanted to cry and scream at my own emotional roller coaster. I couldn’t even keep up with myself. I began fanning myself with the brochure I held. It suddenly felt extremely hot in the room.

              Damon’s hands wrapped around my waist as he kissed my head admiring the same painting that I did. “What are your thoughts?” he asked on the painting. Before I could respond the cameraman appeared.

              “Hey Mr. Brogardt can I get a photo of you and your beautiful fiancée,” he said indicating for us to get closer.

              “She’s not my fiancée,” Damon casually brushed off as he charmed a smile. Those four words felt like daggers to my heart. I forced a smile before the cameraman left. The room felt as if it were swirling around me as those insecure feelings rose again. He openly said that. Was I not good enough for him? Did he hate the sound of it?

              “Hey what’s wrong?” he asked me noticing I was evidently upset. I tried to push it away, but I couldn’t. I was so
angry
at him. Everyone’s words within the last few minutes piled on me and all of it mixed and created doubt. “Are you okay? You look hot.”

              “Is the thought of people assuming I’m your fiancée really that bad?” I blurted. We were both caught off guard. I hesitated to take it back and apologize. I had already said it and I was fuming.

              “What?” He asked baffled. “Clover, are you really upset by that?” He looked around to see if anyone else was noticing my quiet outburst. “I never meant it like that, I just don’t want you feeling like you are pressured or anything of the sort.” He went to cup my face, but I felt repulsed by the action. I just wanted to be alone. I stepped away from his hand. I just wanted to cry and scream at him. I wanted to do the same to myself. Why was I reacting like this? I hated myself for it.

              “I’m going,” I said, definite in my decision. I just wanted to be alone.

              “Are you serious, Clover?” Damon tried to reach out to me again but I pulled away and headed for the door. I emptied my wine glass before leaving the room. I still smiled and said goodbye to a few of the people I was familiar with. Well, who were familiar with Damon. I kept myself composed as I walked out and called for a cab. I had mixed emotions. I wanted to be alone and away from Damon who I felt I was most hurt by, but I also wanted to be chased.

              A thick lump rose in my throat as I got into the back of the cab. I hated these irrational thoughts and the pointless distance I had created between us, but something just didn’t feel right. I hated myself. As soon as we were a block away from the gallery and on the way towards home my eyes began to burn. Tears spilled over my cheeks as I looked out to the pedestrians walking on the sidewalk. I tried to distract myself with the bright lights of Manhattan. My quivering lip gave me away.

              I noticed the cab driver look at his rear view mirror once. I wiped my tears vigorously and gave him a direct look. I was so
angry.
I wanted to chuck a tantrum like a child. I was just so angry and I hated myself for feeling this way. What was wrong with me and why did I even choose a stupid fight with Damon? And yet I felt like I had a point to make or that I would only be reacting like this in case something truly was wrong. What was Damon keeping from me that just didn’t sit right?