Natasha's Awakening (41 page)

She impulsively hugged the older woman then ran upstairs to freshen up a bit before they went out in search of the men. Natasha did splash some water over her face, blotting her eyes to remove all traces of her tears. She quickly touched up her make up, sprayed some perfume at her neck and wrists and then made her way back downstairs to Maggie.

Before they stepped outside, Natasha turned to Maggie. “Thank you.” She said and Maggie smiled at her.

“Remember lass, this is our little secret. You do that test and see what’s happening and then you’ll know if you have something to fight for and if you need anything, you give me a call lass. Get your phone and put this number in it.” And once Natasha had pulled out her phone, Maggie gave her, her number. “You call me anytime if you need to lass,” and she squeezed Natasha’s hand again.

Together they walked out into the sun to go and find Eric and Thomas and although Natasha’s mind reeled from what Maggie had told her, for the first time, she felt a small spark of hope come to life inside her. Perhaps this could end happily ever after for her and Eric after all.

                                                                             Chapter 19.

Thomas and Eric were in the garage hunched over the engine of a ride on mower. Eric looked up when Natasha and Maggie stepped inside and he grinned at her. She smiled back, looking at him through new eyes now she knew what he’d endured as a child. She knew she was going to have to be very careful not to let anything show on her face or accidently say something to him. It was important that he not know that she knew things about him that he mustn’t have wanted to share with her, otherwise he would have already.

“Oh what are you boys fiddling around with now?” Maggie asked them.

Thomas snorted. “It’s not fiddling woman, we’re trying to locate the problem with the engine.”

“Oh and what’s Eric supposed to know about engines Tom? Leave the lad alone. He shouldn’t be wasting his holiday time on a ride on mower,” Maggie told him.

“It’s ok Maggie.” Eric reassured her. “If the damned thing’s had it, I’ll get a new one. No point nursing a tired old piece of machinery, trying to keep it going. I’m good for the money for a new one.” He joked.

“Listen to the lad Tom. Don’t bother him with this now. Let him enjoy the rest of his stay here with his lass.” Maggie said assertively and Thomas mumbled under his breath about bossy women. Natasha smiled, Maggie sure did wear the pants in their marriage.

“Tom if you want to repair the mower, that’s up to you, but I’ll leave you with enough money to buy a new one. I don’t want you wasting your time trying to keep this old thing going if it’s ready for retirement.”

“So mechanics aren’t your thing?” Natasha teased him. “I thought you could do anything Mr Rothman. After all, you’re not just a pretty face.” She grinned.

Eric managed to look slightly affronted. “I used to keep the old bombs going that I drove years ago baby. I can work on an engine enough to keep it going for a while but those days are gone. I don’t have the time or interest to do it anymore. It’s just easier to replace it baby.” Eric explained to her. “Why spend hours tearing engines apart, getting all dirty when I have the money to buy a new one?”

Maggie suddenly clapped her hands together. “Ok Tom, come on. Let’s leave these two to enjoy their time without us old fogies getting in their way.” She said.

“Yes dear.” Thomas said and Natasha had to turn her head so no one would see the grin on her face at how quickly Thomas folded and gave into his wife. As she struggled to keep her face straight, she met Eric’s eyes and saw amusement dancing in his blue gaze too.

They all left the garage and started walking back to the house. “I’ll get your cake tin.” Natasha said and Maggie told her she’d come too and together they walked inside, leaving the men out by Thomas and Maggie’s car. Once they got inside, Natasha removed the last cupcakes from the cake tin and put them on a plate. “You cover them over lass so they don’t dry out.” She told Natasha and she nodded, rummaging for glad wrap. She found some in one of the kitchen drawers and covered the cupcakes up. “So lass, what are you going to do about your man?” Maggie asked and Natasha sighed.

“I don’t know. I’m going to have to do that pregnancy test I suppose, but I’m so scared.” She whispered and Maggie patted her arm.

“I know you are lass, but if there’s a baby coming, it’s not just going to go away because you can’t face up to it. How late are you?”

Natasha thought for a moment, “Only about 2 days I think but I’ve never been very regular with my cycle.” She said.

“That won’t matter lass. These tests can give you an answer the moment you think you’re late. You can’t put it off. Give it another day if that makes you feel better but if you don’t get your period tomorrow, I’d do the test. You be sure to give me a call when you have an answer either way.” Maggie took her hands and gave them a squeeze and Natasha felt tears gathering at the back of her eyes again. She blinked rapidly to get herself under control.

“I will Maggie and thank you.” She reached out to hug the older woman again.

They went back outside to join Eric and Thomas again and after a round of hugs and good byes, Thomas and Maggie got back in their car and drove off. Natasha and Eric waved to them until their car had disappeared from view.

Eric turned to her once they were alone again. “You and Maggie seemed to hit it off ok.”

Natasha nodded. “She’s really nice Eric, so is Thomas, but Maggie’s just one of those ladies whose like everyone’s Mum.” She said.

“Yeah baby, I know what you mean. She’s been really good to me since I bought this place. Always making food for me. I think she’s convinced I’d starve if I didn’t have her making meals for me. Well, you can see that for yourself. All the food she made, not to mention stocking the fridges and pantry like she’s expecting us to be holed up here for the next 6 months or something.” Natasha couldn’t help but notice that Eric was still keeping the truth of his relationship with Maggie from her, but she said nothing. She’d promised Maggie she wouldn’t.

“So, what are we going to do for the rest of the day?” Natasha asked and Eric shrugged.

“How about we finally get you out and you can buy some warmer clothes.” He suggested.

“We’re going to be here long enough for that?” She asked. “You’re not getting restless for work yet?”

“No baby, I’m not. I know we’re going to have to get back eventually, but I’m happy to stay here a few more days.” Suddenly his expression became serious. “I’m hoping to have an answer as to whether you’re pregnant before we go home. I need to know so we can work out what to do to take care of the situation.” He said and Natasha tensed. She knew what Eric meant when he said ‘take care’ of the situation and she felt her blood freeze in her veins. Despite what Maggie had told her she wasn’t so confident Eric would come around and warm to the idea of Fatherhood. He wasn’t even open to discussing the possibility. “You’re late aren’t you?” He asked and Natasha shook her head.

“No Eric. I don’t think so. I don’t know. I’ve never been very regular with my cycle.” She told him.

“Well while we’re out today, I suggest you get a pregnancy test kit.”

Natasha felt colour heat her face. “I already have one.” She said quietly. “I bought it when I went to the Chemist in Sheffield. I just didn’t tell you.”

“Why the hell not?” Eric’s voice hardened. “You were going to keep something like that from me? The outcome affects me too you know. I can’t be a father Natasha, I just can’t. You won’t trap me with a child I don’t want.” He ground out. Natasha had trouble containing her shock at how quickly his anger had flared up. A possible pregnancy really was a touchy subject with him and any kind of rational discussion was out of the question as far as he was concerned.

Natasha watched him, the anger in his expression, the way he raked his hands through his hair repeatedly and her heart sank. Maggie was wrong. He didn’t love her and in her opinion hell would freeze over before Eric ever accepted any child of his. “It’s just a test kit Eric. I haven’t taken the family silver.” She snapped.

“I want you to do that test Natasha, and I want you to do it now.” He said and Natasha bristled at the way he was speaking to her.

“Don’t order me around Eric. I’ll do the test because I want to do the damned test, not because you’re telling me to do it.” Her voice shook. She could feel tears threatening again and she fought hard to hold them at bay, determined she wasn’t going to fall apart in front of him. There would be plenty of time for that later, once they returned to the mainland. “Why are you getting so angry Eric?” Natasha couldn’t help asking. “If I’m pregnant, I’m not trying to trap you, I’m not asking for a damned thing from you. I..don’t…need…you!” She spat out punctuating each word so he would get the message.

Something flashed at the back of Eric’s eyes, some emotion Natasha couldn’t read before he turned on her. “That’s fine Natasha because I don’t need or want to be a father and I don’t fucking well need you either.” He yelled and stormed off into the house.

Natasha stood there for a while, shock setting in at how rapidly the bubble had burst. Eric had just confirmed her worst fears, he didn’t want her or need her. There was no point her staying in Tasmania any longer, she might as well go home.

Reluctantly she walked in the house, tensing over another possible fight with Eric, but he wasn’t around. She looked downstairs for him because he couldn’t have gone anywhere but she didn’t see him so with her stomach filled with butterflies, she climbed the stairs to the bedroom. Surprisingly he wasn’t upstairs either and Natasha breathed a sigh of relief for a moment before confusion set in. Where the hell was he?

While she was standing in the middle of the bedroom wondering where the hell he could have gone, she heard the rumble of an engine starting and the Ferrari shot out of the garage and took off down the driveway. Eric was gone. She knew he would have to come back sooner or later, all his things were in the house, but she felt a moment’s panic that he’d gone off and left her. No word about where he was going, when he’d be back and very obviously upset going by the way he’d driven the Ferrari out of the yard. Despite how much her heart was splintering in her chest right now, she couldn’t bare it if he had an accident because he was upset.

She still couldn’t understand why he had become so upset. An unexpected pregnancy wasn’t the end of the world and that was how Eric was treating it. He went so crazy over the idea of it, acting like a caged animal but Natasha had no intention of asking him for anything and she sure as hell didn’t need him to be in the picture. To be a part of his child’s life, if there was a child at all.

“Just do the damned test Natasha and then you’ll know for sure.” She told herself, going to dig around in her bag to find the pregnancy test kit before she lost her nerve. She read the instructions and once she knew what she had to do, she gathered up the test kit and went into the bathroom.

A few minutes later and her world came crashing down around her ears. She was pregnant. She stared at the two lines on the pregnancy test strip which meant a positive reading and she felt sick. It was over. There was no coming back from this now. Eric would never accept her being pregnant. He’d never accept becoming a Father. Their time together was finished. Her job, everything was over. She had to get away from this place and she had to do it now.

Natasha started throwing her clothes into her bag as quickly as she could, worried that Eric might come back at any time. She gathered up her toiletries in the bathroom then carried her bag downstairs to go through picking up anything of hers that was lying around. She worked steadily and quickly refusing to give too much thought to what she was doing because she knew if she did, she would break down and cry and probably not be able to stop.

Once she was ready, she called Launceston Airport and was lucky enough to get a seat on the flight that left for Sydney in four hours. Now all she had to do was get there and without a car, that wasn’t going to be easy.

Natasha thought about taking one of the other vehicles in the garage but she wasn’t sure about that. Taking Eric’s car, driving in a State she wasn’t familiar with, could all go horribly wrong and she’d miss her flight. She would call Maggie. It was a lot to ask of her, asking her to not only drive her to the airport but to do something that would very likely anger Eric. Still Natasha had no choice, she was running out of time.

She pulled out her phone and dialed the number Maggie had given her and waited impatiently for the older woman to answer, suddenly panicking that she might not even answer the phone. “Hello.” Maggie’s Scottish accent came down the line and Natasha breathed a sigh of relief.

“Maggie? It’s Natasha.” She said.

“Oh lassie, what can I do for you?” At the sound of her cheerful greeting over the line, Natasha burst into tears.

“Oh lass, what’s wrong? What’s that lad done to you? Stay put, I’m coming over right now.” The phone went dead in Natasha’s ear.

She sat down on the lounge, dropping her head into her hands and sobbed. She cried for what could never be, for not being enough for Eric to love her, tears for her unborn child who would never know his or her Father. She just couldn’t stop the tears streaming down her face and as a result she never heard the car pull up in the yard until she felt Maggie’s arms come around her as she continued sobbing, her heart breaking. It felt like it was splintering in her chest, the pain of her loss almost crippling.

Maggie rubbed her back, talking constantly to her until finally Natasha managed to get her emotions under control enough to sit up and face the woman. “Oh poor sweet lass, what’s wrong?” Maggie asked, her tone gentle as she pulled a few tissues from her bag and handed them to Natasha.

“Eric and I had a fight.” She told her. “He was so angry because I hadn’t told him I’d already bought a pregnancy test kit. He demanded I do it and he made it perfectly clear he won’t accept me pregnant. He told me he doesn’t want a baby or me. He just took off in his car and I don’t know where he’s gone but he was so angry.” Natasha’s voice broke and fresh tears chorused down her face.