Night Fires (4 page)

“Do what?” My voice became higher as images from the news channels tormented my mind.

“Well, it’s not too bad.” Bray sighed but shivered. “Although, it took me months to get the blood off my skin. It’s a right royal pain in the ass, lamb’s blood. Proper gooey and stinks like mouldy liver.”

My stomach twisted. “WHAT?”

Janie laughed loudly as Bray nudged me in the ribs. “Bloody hell. Hook, line, and sinker.”

Shaking my head but sighing in relief, I couldn’t help but smile at the pair. “You’re mean.”

“Give us a break.” Bray chuckled. “We need some excitement in this retirement village.”

Janie nodded. “It’s nice to welcome someone our age.”

“Yeah.” I nodded, taking a sip of my drink and smiling gratefully at the barmaid. “I had noticed the under thirties are a pretty rare species.”

“Pfft,” Janie said. “With you, there’s six of us.”

My jaw dropped and I stared at her in disbelief. “You’re joking!”

“Nope.” Bray gulped at his own pint. “When Elizabeth died, we were actually down to five, but David moved into Carter’s old place after Christmas, and now you’ve joined us.”

“Well that would make seven of us.”

When they both tensed and clammed up, I decided to change the direction of conversation. “Wow. So what do we do for nights out?”

“We have to go to Penzance for a lively night. We usually have a blow out once a month and stay over in Newquay,” Janie told me.

I nodded, scanning the area for a certain man now his name had been mentioned. “So, Carter not joined you?” Bray and Janie lifted their brows, shock on their faces. “What did I say?”

“Carter would get the wrath of the full room if he walked in here,” Bray said quietly.

“Surely he can’t be that unpopular?”

“Unpopular?” He shook his head. “No, just with it being a pub and all.”

I frowned and shook my head, puzzled. “And?”

“Ahh.” Bray sighed and smiled softly at me. “That’s what the brandy conversation was about. Carter’s a recovering alcoholic.”

“Oh shit.” I now understood his reaction the previous night. “I didn’t know. I put brandy in his coffee!”

“It’s okay. I gathered.” Bray squeezed my shoulder. “He’s had a rough ride the past couple of years. Lost track of who he was for a while. But he’s pulled it back.”

I nodded, unsure of what to say. We’d all been there. Well, I had, anyway. I doubted the few people that filled Mousehole would be considerate of my reckless ways either, and once again I found myself sympathising with Carter.

“Well, that killed the conversation.” Janie laughed. Then, banging on the bar, she called the barmaid over. “Same again, and three whisky chasers.”

I stared wide-eyed at her. “What happened to not keeping me out late?”

She winked. “Oh, come on. You need initiating.”

I rolled my eyes but grinned. “Well, so long as there’s no blood.”

“No blood.” Bray tapped his temple with two fingers and lifted his shot. “To getting two girls wrecked enough to take me home and play strip twister,” he toasted with a cheeky wink.

Scoffing, Janie and I toasted back. “In your dreams.”

Blowing out a disappointed sigh, Bray smirked. “Blown out again. Anyone would think I’d got herpes!”

“We’ve all seen your medical records, Bray. Don’t try and laugh it off!” Janie smirked.

“You cheeky mare!” Bray dug a finger into Janie’s side. It was hard not to see the crackle of chemistry between the pair and I smiled to myself, remembering the feeling so well.

“Everything okay?” Janie asked when she looked at me curiously, my pain evidently exposed too clearly.

Forcing a smile, I nodded. “Yep.” Shouting the barmaid over again, I ordered another three shots. “Let’s get drunk!”

“Finally!” Bray exclaimed. “A girl after my own heart!”

I nodded. However, I wasn’t after his heart. I didn’t ever want to own another one, but desperate to forget, I downed another whisky and joined my new friends on the road to much needed oblivion.

Bray and Janie shouted out of the taxi window when I meandered up the steps then went down face first as the brambles wrapped themselves around my ankles again. “Shit, Alice! Are you okay?”

I raised a hand in the air and stuck my thumb up, my drunken giggles stopping me from actually standing to answer them.

“Yay!” Janie shouted. “See you tomorrow.” And with that the taxi pulled off and my new friends left me to sleep on the garden path.

“For fuck’s sake.” His gruff voice beat through the drums in my head, the contents of my stomach fighting with the way my throat restricted its plea for freedom.

“Mmm?”

Opening my eyes when my body was lifted, I stared through the blurry haze into an angry pair of steel grey eyes. His gaze snapped forwards as he expertly avoided the weeds and brought me to my front door.

“How did you find me underneath the bushes?”

He quirked a brow but other than that he showed no facial reaction to my question. “You broke wind.”

My eyes widened then I blew out a breath and nodded knowingly. “It’s Guinness. Always does that to me.”

“Keys?” Carter barked, making me blink vacantly. “Keys, Alice. Where are your keys?”

“Uhh, my bag?”

He huffed and shifted me into one arm as he snatched my bag and rummaged inside with his free hand. I gawped at him, amazed he was able to lift me in one arm. I wasn’t overweight but my hips held a layer of flesh that really shouldn’t be there, and my stomach was far from flat.

He swung the door open and kicked it shut behind him then carried me up the stairs and into my bedroom. “Carter,” I mumbled, astonished that I had the capacity to say his name correctly, never mind remember it. “Carter…”

“What?”

“I’m going to puke.”

His eyes rolled at the same time as a furious growl rumbled in his chest. Turning around quickly, he rushed to the bathroom and rather inelegantly dropped me beside the toilet, the fat on my arse providing little in the way of cushioning.

He stood by me as I vomited into the bowl, my groans as loud as my retches. The room filled with the smell of whisky and I grimaced. “You should go,” I managed through my heaves.

He remained stoic as he continued to watch me spew. I was positive he was enjoying my suffering.

“Finished?” he asked when I leaned back. I nodded glumly.

He filled a cup with water and handed it to me along with my toothbrush, loaded and equipped with paste. Again, he watched me, studying me as I brushed my teeth, my cheeks heating with shame as he glared at me.

When I’d finished, he scooped me up and walked back into the bedroom. This time, instead of just dropping me, he held onto me as he pulled back the duvet then slipped me gently under it and pulled off my pumps.

“Do you need a bucket?”

I shook my head slowly, still mortified by my behaviour and his care. He nodded then turned and opened the door.

“Carter,” I whispered making him stop and turn back. “What time is it?”

“Two.”

“In the morning?”

He nodded again. I nodded back. As he tried to leave, again, I called his name once more. “Did your fire go out?”

He swallowed but answered me with a firm nod.

I nodded back. “Did she come?”

The air around me seemed to disappear when he froze. His eyes narrowed on me as his Adam’s apple bobbed in distress. He appeared to grow in size. However, I was drunk, my tact now in the drain with my stomach. “Did she? Did she come back for you, Carter?”

Just when I thought he was either going to beat me up or combust on the spot, he slowly shook his head. Securing my gaze, his clear eyes fixing on my bloodshot ones, his lips parted and he sighed. “No, Alice. She did not.”

I nodded sadly. “They never come for me either.” Then I turned over and drifted off to sleep.

Morning, Billy.

Good Lord, my damn head is pounding. Too much alcohol. You should be grateful you never found the temptation of oblivion . . . I’m talking about whiskey and Guinness, BTW. Do you have Guinness up there? If you do, don’t touch the stuff!! It’s evil!!

I’ve made some great friends already and everyone has welcomed me. Well, apart from one guy. I feel for him though. I can’t help comparing him to myself. He lost his wife last year and she was pregnant with their child.

It just makes me wonder. Mum always used to tell us that there was a God, and that he was looking down on us. Yet, lately, I struggle to accept that. What kind of superior being would allow his ‘children’ to suffer like this?

I miss you so much, kid. All of you. Something I’ve wanted to ask you for a while …. Do you watch me? I know, stupid question. Yet, sometimes, especially on my beach, I look up and I swear I can feel you, smell you even. I can hear the whisper of Josh’s laughter and the scent of Mum’s perfume. I know. It’s just my imagination keeping me sane, but sadly, I like that it does. It holds you near.

Anyway, I have to get to work. Give everyone big squeezes, and I love you all. Forever.

Swilling down the rest of my coffee, I grumbled at the pounding in my head as I pulled on my pumps. I mentally made a note to chastise Janie. It was all her fault.

Locking the door behind me, I made my way down the rickety stone steps. Reaching the bottom, I stopped and frowned as I turned back. “Eh?”

The path was clear. All the weeds and brambles had been uprooted, the way through now completely clear. In fact, the whole front of the house had been tidied, the ivy remaining but cut back so the small pink buds still adorned the white walls.

Scratching my head I wondered if Carlos had been round, but it had only been four hours since I’d fallen into bed, and I doubted he would have worked through the night. Trying to figure it out, I gave up by the time I reached the café, my brain way too delicate to cope with my rambling mind.

“Good morning,” Janie said brightly when I walked in. She grinned at me as she slipped my sunglasses up my face and perched them on the top of my head. The light burned my retinas and tortured my poorly head.

“How come you’re so bloody perky?”

She winked and walked out into the dining area with two plates of bacon and eggs, the smell wafting into my nostrils and causing my stomach to gurgle in revulsion.