No Limits (3 page)

“And I never have to use it. Ironic, isn't it?”

“Life is complicated,” he said. “Way more so than we ever could have guessed in high school.”

“True. So you don't want to talk about your health and I can respect that, but I need to know if you are in danger. We're a good forty-five minutes from the nearest hospital.”

“I'm okay,” he said. “It's not anything that's going to kill me while I'm here.”

Health concerns
.

He'd said it like that because he didn't want to talk about it and make it seem more real. Giving it a name would mean he was fighting something serious. Instead of, say, a cold or a muscle strain. Those were things anyone could beat. This? He wasn't sure. But being purposely vague would just make it seem more mysterious to her and he doubted she'd leave it alone.

“I have some symptoms of spaceflight osteopenia.”

“I don't know what that is,” Molly said. “But it sounds like osteoporosis. Does it have something to do with your bones?”

“Yes. In microgravity, astronauts don't put weight on our back or leg muscles, and the longer we're up there the more they start to weaken and get smaller.”

“Have you lost height?” she asked.

He shrugged. “When I first returned to Earth I was a bit taller, but now I'm back to normal. They are more concerned with my raised calcium levels and loss of bone density.”

“What can you do?” she asked.

“I'm doing it—or I will be, at least. Working on the ranch, lifting, putting my body to good use, all of these things are going to help,” he said with more than a bit of hope and bravado. “I'm supposed to be tested again in three months. I did an advanced regimen during my time on the ISS and if Doctor Tomlin's theories are correct I should improve more quickly than others have in the past. Part of my mission on the ISS was for her to test the effects of prolonged exposure to space. She has me trying different exercises and a special diet to decrease my recovery time.”

Molly nodded. He'd shared his medical information but hadn't really told her what that meant to him.

“How long are you going to stay?” she asked. She needed to know. She needed to make plans. That was what she should be doing instead of walking in the moonlight with Jason McCoy. But here she was.

“It's three months to my reevaluation. That should give us some time to figure out what to do with the ranch.”

“I don't want to sell it,” she said. “And I can't buy you out. Not now.”

“Oh. I was really hoping to sell my half to you. My life isn't here at the Bar T.”

“Dad borrowed some money from you, so you must know the ranch isn't as profitable as it once was,” she said.

“I could just sign over my half to you. NASA pays me well enough, and by rights the ranch should be yours.”

That idea didn't sit right with her. After all, he'd already put money into the ranch and never got a cent back. “No. Thank you for the offer, but Dad wanted you to have this for a reason. He wouldn't have felt right not paying you back, at least. And even though I don't understand or appreciate why he made us full partners in this ranch, I won't go against his wishes. Maybe you will find that you like the ranching life.” Every once in a while the breeze blew in the right direction and the scent of his aftershave wafted on the wind.

“I don't think I will.” He stared up at the stars again, looking as if he would fly up to them now if he could and leave everything earthbound behind.

“There's a lot more to you than I remember,” he said. “Though, to be fair, I don't remember much except that you could outride me.”

“Fair enough,” she said. “All I remember was that I really wanted to kiss you and you were determined not to get involved with me.”

He laughed.

She watched him a second and then smiled. It was the first time since her dad's death that she'd felt...happy.

He noticed her watching him and raised one eyebrow at her.

“You made me smile.”

“I'm glad,” he said. “I like your smile.”

“You do?”

“Yes, ma'am.”

She shook her head. “How many women have fallen for your ‘aw shucks' routine?”

“A fair few,” he admitted with a sheepish smile. “Not everyone is impressed with my being an astronaut and having stayed on the ISS.”

“Really?” she asked. It gave her the shivers to think of the things he'd done and seen. “I am.”

“You are?”

“I've only left the state of Texas once and that was just to go to Louisiana to pick up a bull Dad had purchased. So you having left the planet
is
a big deal,” she said, wondering who would disagree.

He stopped walking and turned to look at her. His features weren't clear in the darkness, but she felt his attention on her.

She licked her lips and tried to step back because she was a hot mess, as she'd said earlier. And Jason was feeling uncertain and worried about his future. This was the worst possible time to be kissing him. And more—she wanted more.

She knew that.

She'd been alone for too long. It had been over eighteen months since she'd ended her last relationship and most of the time she was just fine getting her romance fix on television or in books. But tonight, standing out here in the moonlight with him, she craved...something more.

She never gave in to impulses. That was a lie—she had tonight. She'd left her room, gone into the hallway. He'd kissed her. And when their lips had met...she'd changed.

Something fundamental had shifted inside of her and she was honest enough to admit she didn't know how to react to it. She should never have kissed Jason. She should have left him in the past, in those teenage-girl dreams.

But he was here and that kiss was fresh in her mind. Her lips tingled and she realized that being this close to him stirred something inside of her that she usually did a good job of ignoring. Stirred the passion and the desire that she preferred to think she was the master of. That she had been able to control until Jason.

“Jason...”

“Yes?”

“Why did you stop walking?” she asked.

“Because I wanted to show you this,” he said. He drew her into his arms and she started to lift her face to his, her eyes slowly closing. But he turned her so that he stood behind her and put his hand under her chin, tipping her head back toward the sky.

She was on fire with need. But he treated her like a friend.

They were friends.

Just friends.

She repeated that over and over again as he pointed to the stars. Was the passion she felt one-sided?

3

A
CE
KEPT
HIS
touch light on her chin as he tipped her head up to the sky. He wanted more. Hell, she was more addicting than his first taste of flying Mach 1 had been. But he wasn't back for good and she deserved more than a summer fling.

He had always loved the stars and the sky but, more than that, the freedom they had represented. He knew life had been different for Molly. She'd had her dad and when her mom had passed she'd had Rina. She'd grown up in a house filled with love and support. He hadn't. He'd wanted to escape and run as far away from Texas as he could get.

Ironic that he'd ended up finding his home in Houston. He'd thought he'd have to leave that city far behind to find peace, but he'd been wrong. It wasn't the first thing he'd been wrong about and he doubted very much it would be the last.

“What am I looking at?” she asked. Her voice was soft like the gentle breeze stirring around them and her hair smelled of summer strawberries. He remembered the way it had looked falling in disheveled waves around her shoulders and was tempted to remove the elastic holding it in place now.

“Venus,” he said. “Venus takes only a fraction of one Earth year—225 days—to orbit the sun once, so we see it frequently in the night sky. Sometimes Jupiter and Mars line up with it—it's rare, but you can see all three in a triangle in the sky.”

“Now?”

“No. Usually closer to sunrise,” he said.

“What's it like to see the sunrise from orbit?”

He wasn't sure he could put it into words. He wasn't one of those poetic guys who turned their adventures on the space station into books. Despite his time with NASA, he was still more of a cowboy, he guessed, even if he didn't want to be tied to the Earth.

“It's awesome,” he said at last.

She chuckled.

“Awesome?”

“Yeah, got a problem with that?”

“Not at all,” she said. “Good to know that you haven't changed all that much.”

For a moment he didn't follow and then he remembered when he'd first come to the ranch. All he'd said to everything was
awesome
in a sarcastic tone.

“Forgot about that. I don't use the word much anymore. Must be something about the Bar T that brings it out in me.”

“Must be,” she said, stepping aside. “I guess we should think about heading back.”

“If you do, you'll miss the best part.”

“What's the best part?” she asked, turning in his arms. She had her head tipped back and their eyes met in the inky darkness. It was hard to read the expression in hers and that made him feel a bit freer. She wouldn't be able to read the expression in his eyes, either. He didn't want her to see how much she affected him.

He traced one finger down the line of her neck. “You are so delicate-looking in the moonlight. Like the Carina Nebula.”

“I've never heard of it,” she said. Her words were soft, and he had the feeling she was waiting for something.

Him?

“It's not as well-known as many of the other nebulas. It's found in the southern sky.”

“South like southern hemisphere?”

“Yeah. Remember how I wasn't sure where Montana was for the longest time?” he asked. He'd been so green when he'd lived here. When he was surviving on the streets, the only things that had mattered were food and staying away from the authorities. He'd never done well in school until he'd come to the Bar T and hadn't had those worries anymore.

“I do. But you always knew the night sky,” she said. “Was it because of... I don't know much about your family. Dad always respected the privacy of the guys who came here. Said if you wanted me to know your story, you'd tell me.”

“Nothing to tell. I knew the sky because I read a book when I was younger, before things got rough, about sailors who navigated using the stars. It just sort of stuck.”

“Probably like me and
Misty of Chincoteague
. If I hadn't already loved horses, that book made me.”

He didn't dwell on the past, especially his childhood. There was nothing but pain and humiliation there and the future had always been where he'd seen himself. But he realized now how much of the man he was today had been shaped by those events. He was a maverick, even in the Cronus program. Always pushing boundaries and going on missions that others thought twice about. It was why his boss was determined that he get back in top physical condition as quickly as possible.

He was realistic enough to know he probably wouldn't be part of the Mars mission team since the first one wouldn't likely happen for at least another twenty years. The test missions, though. The long-term journeys and a possible moon base. Those were all programs he was interested in.

But Cronus was close to his dream mission. They'd be taking up the components for the first base between Earth and Mars. They'd establish the way station and each mission would continue to test human endurance in space.

“Like that,” he agreed. But he wasn't thinking about their conversation anymore. He was thinking about Molly. And how she'd always been just out of his reach. He had been afraid he wasn't good enough for her as a teenager, and he realized now that he'd also been running from anything that hinted at a normal life. Still was.

But in the moonlight, with the horses neighing behind them, it was easy to see that none of that mattered. He cupped the back of her head and lowered his mouth to hers. Slowly, in case she wanted to pull back. But she didn't.

She rose on her tiptoes and put her hands on his shoulders. She held him loosely for balance and he felt the brush of her breath over his lips a second before their mouths met. He moved his lips over hers and closed his eyes.

He knew he couldn't stay, that this could never be more than a few moonlight kisses, but somehow that seemed perfect to him.

* * *

T
HROWING
CAUTION
TO
the wind wasn't her MO, but this was Jason. And she knew no matter what happened with his health, he wouldn't stay here on the Bar T Ranch for long. He had always been destined for bigger things.

She sighed and almost let her thoughts derail her, but then she shook her head. Shook herself. Not tonight. Like she'd promised herself earlier this evening when she left her bed...no regrets.

Pushing her fingers into his hair, cupping his scalp, she tilted her head to the side to deepen the kiss. Now that they had been out here riding and talking, he tasted different to her. More like adventure and the promise of things she'd never be brave enough to take for herself.

He tasted like a man who was leaving, the same way he had that long-ago summer when she'd wanted to be sophisticated enough to seduce him into staying.

She pulled back.

“What is it?”

How could she tell him that suddenly she felt too silly, too foolish for him? She couldn't. She wouldn't. “Nothing.”

“Dammit, Molly. It's just a kiss,” he said, his Texas drawl stronger than it had been earlier.

It couldn't lead anywhere—that was the problem. Opportunities for real, lasting romance were lacking in this town and maybe she was tired of it. There weren't a lot of men in Cole's Hill that she would consider dating. Mainly because they were either ranchers like herself and busy with their own land, or she'd dated them in high school, or they weren't her type. And she was here with Jason...Ace. It was hard to think of him as Ace.

“You'd think that I could just let go and have some mindless fun, but even now, with nothing left to lose, I can't do it.”

He pulled her into his arms and hugged her. Just held her close. She wasn't crying like she had been earlier. That flood of tears thankfully wasn't near the surface. But the loneliness she'd felt lately, as she'd come to accept that her dad was truly gone, was back.

She turned her head to the side, rested her cheek against his chest and listened to his heartbeat. It was strong. Steady.

“Just once I want to be like one of those brash women on TV who takes what she wants and smiles as she resumes her normal life.”

“Aw, Molly,” Jason said, tipping her back and dropping a sweet, butterfly kiss on the end of her nose. “That's not you.”

“More's the pity,” she said.

He rubbed his thumb over her jawbone. His hands were firm but not rough. Not like hers, calloused and hardened from years of working with cattle and the land. As he touched her a slow heat began to burn deep inside. A shiver went from her jaw to her neck, then over her shoulder and down her arm. Her lips parted.

As Jason stared down at her, she wished she could read the expression in his eyes. She couldn't tell what he was thinking, and she didn't want to do something...what? Dumb? Too late. It had been too late since the moment her father's attorney had revealed that she and Jason were jointly inheriting the Bar T. It had been too late since she'd realized he would be coming back and something feminine and needy had awoken inside of her.

She stared up at him, his eyes silvery pools in the dim light, and realized that she was a coward. All this wanting to be someone else wasn't true to her. She was hiding because she was afraid.

She was twenty-nine. Well past the age when she'd thought she'd let fear drive her. She felt the wash of his breath over her and she closed her eyes—somehow everything seemed easier with her eyes closed. Then she felt his thumb rub over her bottom lip.

She sighed again.

He pulled her more fully against him, her breasts resting on his chest and their hips lightly touching. She felt the brush of his lips over hers. The intimacy of it heightened because the only senses she used at this moment were taste and touch. His body heat surrounded her. His arms were strong as he held her close.

His lips were warm and firm, and as he opened them over hers she let go and just experienced Jason. The way his tongue brushed hers slowly and then pulled back. The way he kept one hand gently on her shoulder, his finger stroking the pulse at the curve where her neck and shoulder met. The way he let the kiss develop between them with no rush or agenda.

She felt safe.

She felt like they could stand there all night rediscovering each other and the passion she'd been too young to really understand all those years ago.

She rubbed her tongue over his and he moaned a little, shifting her stance. He put one of his hands on her back and drew her even closer so that she was nestled in the cradle of his legs. He cupped her butt, caressing it through her jeans, and she shivered as sensation washed through her.

She put her hands on his hips, holding him as much to steady herself as to feel him. He was solid, muscled. And for the first time since he'd set foot back on the Bar T, she acknowledged that she wanted him, needed him to stay right here with her. But she knew he never would.

* * *

M
OLLY
FELT
SO
GOOD
. He didn't have a lot of time in his life for romance. He dated—well, if one-night stands and vacation flings could be called dating—but he had dreams that no woman could compete with. That had been true for longer than he could remember.

But Molly tempted him. She wasn't casual—no matter how much he wanted to pretend otherwise. And he was tied to her and to this land until they could come up with a solution that would satisfy them both.

Then there was his health. He glanced up at the starry sky again and then cursed and closed his eyes. There was no place to run from this.

And at the moment Molly was the only thing that felt real to him.

He put his hands on her face. Felt the softness of her skin. The scent of her perfume surrounded him and his eyes drifted closed as he let go. Really let go of everything.

Her lips were soft under his, pliant. Her tongue rubbed over his and he sucked it gently into his mouth. One of his hands left her head and moved down her back, his fingers testing the resilience of her hips.

He groaned at the way her curves fit against him. It was as if she was custom-made for him the way his space suit was. He shifted back, lifting her off her feet.

She clung to him as she tipped her head and her tongue plunged deeper into his mouth. He hardened in a rush, rocking his hips forward until his erection was nestled at the top of her thighs.

Her legs parted and she wrapped them around his hips. He staggered backward and then realized there was nothing to lean against. He carefully knelt down and lowered Molly to the ground beneath him. He braced one hand on the soft grass and shifted so that he straddled her.

She turned her head to the side.

“My ponytail is uncomfortable,” she said.

He reached beneath her head and pulled out the elastic. Burying his fingers in her thick hair, he fanned it out around her head.

He stretched out next to her on the grass and drew her up on her side so that they faced each other.

“There's an easier way to do this, but I wanted to see your hair down,” he said.

“Why?” she asked, her voice was quiet, shy almost.

Not the Molly who could tame a wild horse or quell an ornery ranch hand with just a glance. This was the woman he'd always wondered about. The one who sometimes wandered into his dreams before he sent her on her way.

“It's beautiful.” He rubbed a few strands between his thumb and forefinger.

“No. It's nothing special. Just sort of average.”

In her words he heard the implicit belief that
she
was average. And that shook him because she'd always been anything but.

“You know you're not average,” he said.

“I think for this area of the country I am.”

“Nah, you stand out, Molly Tanner. You always have. Your eyes are like dark chocolate—a man could lose himself staring into those eyes—and your hair...it's so silky and soft and I just want to bury my face in and breathe in the sweet strawberry scent.”