No Regrets (Bomar Boys #1) (40 page)

“Cash…” She took a shaky breath and shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts.

“I know it’s not a diamond. It’s nothing fancy and you deserve better. I’ll get you something nicer I swear I just…” His gaze dropped and color tinged his cheeks, as if the admission embarrassed him, “This is the first piece of jewelry we ever shared and I thought it was fitting to give it back to you like this. It’s why I kept it all these years. You gave me a ring when I was too young and too stupid to realize what it meant but I do now. If you don’t want it, I…”

“No, I do.” She reached for his hand when he started to draw back, “You just surprised me. It’s beautiful.”

“No.” He snorted, “It’s not. I should have taken the time to get you a real engagement ring but…”

“This is the one I want.” She pulled it out of his hand and slid it onto her finger, “It’s the one I always wanted.”

She couldn’t stop a small smile from spreading over her face as she stared at the old silver ring on her hand. It wasn’t flashy and fancy. It was the complete opposite of the diamond ring she’d worn before. The ring that everyone had oohed and awed over had never felt right but this one did. It was perfect.

“Does that mean yes?” Cash stared at her hand and then glanced back up at her, “Will you marry me?”

She knew all the reasons she should say no. It was too fast. It was reckless and irresponsible. They’d been fighting only hours ago. He’d walked out on her. She’d sent him away. They’d both lied and broken each other’s trust. But in the grand scheme of things, it all came down to the one, undeniable truth that she had never been able to deny.

She loved him. She’d always loved him. And she wanted to spend her life with him.

“Yes.”

Cash’s grin was instantaneous, dimples flashing as he stared at her, “Yes?”

“Yes, I’ll marry you.”

She leaned forward and pressed her mouth to his, erasing any doubt that she meant it. Cash stilled against her for a moment as if the move surprised him and then she felt his grin before he kissed her back. His tongue probed her lips and she opened for him, twining her tongue with his and earning a groan just before his hands were on her and she was tugged off the couch and into his lap.

A giggle escaped her as they fumbled together, “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He peppered kisses across her jaw, “You just made all my dreams come true baby and I promise, I’m going to make yours come true too.”

He kissed her again and she wrapped her arms around him. She had no doubt about that. Cash was her dream guy. Everything about him, even his damage, was beautiful to her. They’d been made for each other and though it had taken them some time and some distance to find their way back to each other, she would never question that they belonged together.

“I know its fast.” Cash pulled back from the kiss with a groan, “We’ll take our time if you want, have a long engagement.”

“You’d do that for me?”

“Anything you want.” He brushed her hair back, “You were engaged before, I get that, but I’m telling you right here and right now, you’re not getting out of this one Jemma.”

She grinned, “Promise?”

“Promise.”

He kissed her again and she melted against him. It was a gentle kiss, sweet and tender. He kissed her like he was trying to show her just how much he loved her, as if she didn’t already know. She loved when he kissed her like this, innocent and soft, but after the tumult of emotions she’d felt tonight, she needed more. She needed to feel him, all of him, every inch of passion that bound them together.

She broke the kiss with a whisper, “Make love to me.”

“Anything you want. Always.”

He kissed her again, soft and sweet, and she nipped at his bottom lip. He growled but only tongued her in response. She pulled his hair and he grasped her wrists in his hands, tugging her away. She arched her hips and he pushed back, pinning her between him and the couch.

With a frustrated groan she pulled back, “I changed my mind.”

“Hmm?” He peppered kisses across her jaw.

“I want you to fuck me instead.”

Cash groaned, “Jesus, Jem, when you talk like that…”

“I know.” She bit his earlobe and grinned, “Do you remember our first time? We were sitting on the floor at my dad’s house, supposed to be working on our class project but you kept making up excuses to touch me.”

She felt his answering smile against her throat, “You were wearing that pretty little sundress and all I could think about was getting underneath it.”

His hands slid around her hips, drawing her up and she tilted her hips, riding the hard length beneath her. They both groaned. He was catching on. Finally. His big palms landed on her ass and he dragged her against him, forcing her to ride him as he nibbled on her neck.

“I ended up in your lap, just like this.” She gasped as he flexed up, grinding his erection between her legs, “And then we were on the floor and you were inside me and nothing had ever felt so right in my life.”

Cash groaned even as he shifted them. He laid her back on the carpet and loomed over her. The new position had him between her thighs, her legs wrapped around his hips and she reveled in the way he pinned her hands to the ground over her head. His eyes were dark with desire as he studied her face and she met him head on, couldn’t look away even if she’d wanted to.

“You deserved better than a hard floor and a quick fuck, Jemma.”

“Maybe, but it was what I wanted then and it’s what I want now.” She leaned up enough to brush her lips against his, “You said you wanted to make me happy remember? I need you.”

She thought he was going to argue some more so he surprised her when he leaned down and kissed her. His lips against hers, his tongue tracing around her mouth, teasing hers into playing. She was so lost in his kiss she almost missed it when his hands raced over her body, ridding her of her clothes. She raised up a little to help him remove her bra and then she lay back to watch as he pushed up to undress himself.

He pulled his t-shirt over his head and she gave a dreamy little sigh. She was never going to get tired of looking at that broad, muscular chest of his. She loved seeing her name inked there, loved knowing that he wore her mark just as surely as he would one day soon wear her ring. He wiggled out of his jeans and her eyes followed the light trail of golden brown hair down to the massive erection that jutted proudly between them, ready to claim her all over again.

“Jesus, baby if you keep looking at me like that, this will only last about as long as it did that first time.”

She grinned at his joke, “I’m done looking for now. It’s time for the touching portion of the evening. I need you.”

He batted her hand away when she reached for him, “Say it again.”

“I need you.”

His answering grin was arrogant and adorable, “I know babe but first you’re going to tell me what I need to hear. Say it again.”

“I love you.”

“And?”

“I’m going to marry you.”

“Fuck yeah you are.” He traced his palm up the inside of her thigh, “You look wet and ready for me. Are you?”

She nodded, “Yes.”

He moved his hand higher, not taking her word for it, and when his thumb stroked over her clit her hips jumped. He circled it slowly and her eyes drifted shut as pleasure radiated through her body. Her entire body clenched with need, wanting more, needing more.

“Cash, please.” She begged.

“You know what else I want to hear.” He shook his head and continued to play with her.

She wracked her brain, trying to figure out what else he wanted to hear. She loved him. She’d agreed to marry him. What else was there? They were going to be together. They were going to build a life together, a family together…

Her eyes drifted open and her lips twitched into a smile, “I’m going to have your babies too.”

Cash groaned, “That’s right. That’s it, babe. Damn, I don’t know why I want that so bad but I need to put a baby in you and tie you to me in every way.”

She bit her lip to stifle a yell of pleasure when he thrust a finger into her. She thought she knew why it was so important to him. He’d never had the things they could have together. A house full of love and happiness. She could give him that.

“We’re going to have a family together. Little baby Bomar boys that are half you and half me.”

“Tell me you want that with me.” He thrust another finger into her and she moaned and arched against him.

“I want that with you. I want everything with you. I want to be your wife and I want to make a baby with you and raise him together, here in our hometown. This is home. You’re home. I love you Cash.”

“Love you.” He ground out, “Need you.”

“Yes, please.”

He rose up over her again in one fluid motion and slammed into her in one brutal thrust. She shrieked and bit her lip so hard she was almost certain she drew blood. He pulled all the way back out and then did it again and she whimpered as her body responded, squeezing him tight, trying to hold him deep where he belonged.

As his body pounded into hers, fucking her hard just like she’d begged for, she cupped his face and met his intense blue gaze. She loved this big, beautiful complex man. She wrapped her legs around him and dragged him down, melding her mouth to his as their bodies met fast and hard, flesh slapping as they raced towards that pleasure peak together.

Her nails scratched his back and he groaned. In the next breath, he was pinning her arms over her head and riding her hips even harder. The show of dominance sent a shiver down her spine and she felt the beginning tremors of her orgasm flutter through her.

She loved him like this. When he lost control even as he took control of her body. Taking what he needed from her and giving it back in spades and spades. She was going to have carpet burns on her butt and shoulders, just as she had after their first time. The memories only served to send her flying higher this time.

“Cash, I’m close.” She gasped out a breath as sweat trickled between her breasts.

“What do you need baby? Tell me what you need and I’ll give it to you. Always.” He never broke his rhythm, driving into her hard and deep as he met her eyes.

This man. Would she ever get enough of him? Of how completely he loved her?

“Kiss me, please I…”

His mouth was on her before she finished the sentence and when his tongue stroked deep, delving into her at the same time his cock hit that secret spot inside her body, she broke. The orgasm shot through her in one jolt of massive pleasure and she broke the kiss to cry out. As the waves pounded at her, she felt him shudder, his movements turning jerky and she knew he was right there with her. He called out her name in a rough, passion-drenched voice as he came inside her, filling her up and making her entire body tighten in response trying to soak him up.

“Oh, God…”

Reality was a hazy, dream-like place as Cash collapsed against her, holding her close in the aftermath of their climax. Her arms felt like noodles, her entire body soft and pliant, but she forced them up and wrapped them around him. He muttered something about being heavy against her neck but let her hold him for a couple of minutes before he forced himself back up onto his elbows.

She smiled when she looked up into his handsome face. His hair was disheveled and fell over his forehead so she pushed it back lovingly. His blue eyes were bright and his smile was wide, his dimples flashing. She’d never seen him look quite so gorgeous or quite so pleased with himself.

“I love you.” She whispered softly.

“I’m never going to get tired of hearing you say that.”

“Good, because I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of saying it.” She yawned and shifted to her side, “Lay down with me.”

“I should get you to bed.”

“Not yet.” She shook her head, “I didn’t get to just lay with you after you made love to me on the floor that first time. Lay with me now.”

His smile softened, as if he understood what she was really asking and he cuddled in beside her, dragging her against his chest. She breathed in the familiar scent of him and her and their lovemaking and closed her eyes. They were putting the past behind them and moving on, for good, together.

“I love you Cash and I’m going to love being a Bomar girl too.”

He chuckled and stroked her back, “A Bomar girl. I like the sound of that.”

“Mmm, I thought you might.” She kissed the tattoo of her name on his chest, “Know what I think you’ll like even better?”

“Hmm?”

“I don’t want a long engagement.”

“You don’t?”

“No... I want to be married to you before the baby comes.”

He gasped. She grinned. And then they were kissing like it was the start of their happily ever after.

There is a staggering failure in our society when it comes to understanding domestic abuse. It is far too easy and simple for us to say it isn’t our problem or it isn’t our business when we see or hear about it. It’s even more problematic when the most common reaction is the oversimplified “just leave” philosophy.

Unfortunately, domestic violence is neither simple nor easy. It is a complex physical, emotional, psychological and sexual problem with damaging and lingering effects for the victim. The conditioned response that a victim should simply leave is naïve and discredits the threats inherit in the abuse to begin with.

Abusers are manipulative. They use psychological and oftentimes financial control over their victims to keep them quiet and at their mercy. One of the most common characteristics of an abuser is the ability to isolate their victim from the friends and family members that they would need in order to leave. Taking away the support system of people who care and the availability of a safe place to run are an abusers favorite lie.

If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic violence, there is help. You are not alone. There are people who understand and can provide assistance. You can find various organizations online by searching for keywords like “help for domestic abuse” in your area.

I know it may feel as if you are alone but you’re not. Don’t be trapped by another lie. If you need help, get it in whatever way you can. Your safety is the first priority.