Nobody's Fool (16 page)

Chapter Twenty

A flood of well-wishers magazine editors, and fashionistas swarmed backstage. Melina held court a few feet away from Jolie who had her own little following. They posed for photos and answered questions. Even while words like “innovative,” “accessible,” and “eminently wearable” reached her ears, Jolie couldn’t stop scanning the crush of people for a glimpse of Court. Surely he was here somewhere. He wouldn’t miss Melina’s big night. Or hers. Would he?

As the evening wore on and the crowd thinned, Jolie’s disappointment grew. Val, who’d been close by throughout the show, left with Krystian after eliciting Jolie’s promise that she’d join them at the private celebration at the restaurant.

By the time Jolie made her escape from the convention center however, her resolve to join the others deserted her. She had that let-down feeling she’d often had on Christmas morning after all the presents were opened. The thrill of the moment was gone and all she was left with was that
is-that-all-there-is
sense of emptiness.

She’d been working grueling hours for the past six months and whatever happened with the collection now was out of her control. She could feel herself deflating as the adrenaline that had kept her going drained away. She was alone.

That word pounded through her like a mantra.
Alone. Alone. Alone
. In her success or her failure, she had no one to share either with. No one to support her or celebrate with her.

Val had paired off with Krystian. Ricky was by Melina’s side. Everywhere she looked she saw couples.

She made her way to the after party across town. The restaurant was decorated with thousands of tiny lights. The outdoor terrace was crowded, the partygoers becoming more boisterous as they added to the champagne they’d already consumed backstage. She handed her keys to the valet and went in, trying to keep her dismal thoughts at bay.

Why did she suddenly feel so lost? She’d built her career on her own, and she’d never had anyone to come home to before. It had never bothered her like this.

When the restaurant door opened and she stepped inside she saw her parents. “Mom? Dad?”

Sue-Ellen embraced her and her father put his arms around them both before Jolie broke away and gave him a proper hug of his own. “I thought you were going to wait until the show in New York.”

“We’re still planning to be there,” her mother answered. “But we wanted to surprise you.”

“You certainly did. You saw the show then?”

“Yes. Melina arranged everything. We’re so proud of you.” Her mother beamed with pride.

“You did good, kid,” Martin agreed, patting her shoulder.

Her parents had always been good to her. For a long time she’d taken it as her due. They’d been supportive, but from a distance. Happy with her achievements as long as she was happy. They didn’t normally get involved or rave with enthusiasm, though. They’d simply always been there when she needed them most. Like tonight. “Should we join the party?”

After endless rounds of socializing, Jolie found a moment to herself. She set her empty wine glass on a table and leaned on the terrace railing, gazing across the street at nothing in particular.

Her mother joined her. “I forgot to give you these.”

She handed Jolie a brown envelope. “What’s this?”

“Something from your last visit. I meant to give them to you before you left, but you were in such a rush.”

“Thanks, Mom.”

“Court isn’t here?”

“No.”

“I thought he would be.”

Jolie made no reply. To agree would have been to let Sue-Ellen see her disappointment.

“Unless you told him to stay away?”

“I didn’t.”

“Huh. Then I’m doubly surprised.”

Jolie turned to her mother. “Why’s that?”

Sue-Ellen smiled. “He was always your biggest fan.”

Jolie looked away. She didn’t need to be reminded.

“I remember when you started drawing, designing clothes. You were, what? Ten? You and Court were inseparable. He was always impressed with your ability to draw. When he had to go home he’d come downstairs and show me these pictures, things you’d given up on and thrown away. He’d smooth them out. ‘Look what Jolie did. Isn’t it great?’ he’d say. I agreed with him, of course, but to be honest I had no idea how talented you were back then. I couldn’t see it. But he did.”

Jolie hung her head. She’d been admiring Melina these past few months, but Melina had a support system, much of it her own family, that allowed her to accomplish so much. People who wanted her to succeed. People she trusted.

Jolie had separated herself from both Court and her parents. Why? So she could fly solo and show them she didn’t need them? But she hadn’t flown at all. Without that support she’d been afraid to spread her wings and try to fly. Until she allowed Court back into her life.

“I blew it, Mom.”

“Blew it? What do you mean? Oh, honey, are you crying?”

Sue-Ellen wrapped an arm around Jolie’s shoulders.

“I was horrible to him. When I left for college, I walked away from him and never looked back. I hurt him so much. When he saw me again, he wanted me to know what it felt like. And then there was the dinner we had the night before I left. And now…now I don’t know how to make it right.”

“Oh, darling.” Sue-Ellen squeezed Jolie. “He always loved you. I have a feeling he still does.”

Jolie sniffed and swiped at her tears. “He isn’t here. I think that says enough.”

“You wanted him here.”

Jolie nodded.

“Did he know that?”

“I never would have told him.”

“Maybe you should tell him now.”

“It’s too late.”

Sue-Ellen squeezed again. “Trust me. When it comes to the people you love, it’s never too late to make things right. The more you love someone, the easier it is for them to hurt you. It’s a sign of how much you care.”

“I never thought of it like that.”

“Sweetheart, if you didn’t love Court so much, what he did wouldn’t have hurt you the way it did.”

“If he didn’t love me, what I did wouldn’t have hurt him so much.”

“Exactly.”

Jolie looked down at the railing. “I’m sorry, Mom.”

Sue-Ellen seemed puzzled. “For what?”

“For freezing you out. I thought I couldn’t trust you. That’s why I never told you anything. Anything important, anyway.”

“You’re forgiven. See how easy that was? I’m sorry for anything I did or said that made you think you couldn’t trust me.”

“I forgive you,” Jolie said with a small smile. “But let’s not tell Becky Harrison about all this, all right?”

“What do you mean?”

“For a long time I was sure Becky also knew the moment I needed a bigger bra or switched brands of mascara.”

“Is that why you stopped confiding in me? Because you were afraid I’d share your confidences with Becky?”

“‘My little girl’s become a
wo
man
, Becky’,” Jolie said in imitation of her mother’s tone.

“Oh. Oh my. I had no idea you overheard that.”

Jolie nudged her mother’s shoulder and started to giggle.

There were laughing together when Martin joined them. “I think the party’s over.”

The car seemed to steer itself home. No. Not home, Jolie reminded herself as she parked in the driveway. Court’s home. Where they shared space but little else.

Why couldn’t she admit it to herself? It wasn’t just anyone she’d wanted to share this evening with. It was Court. After months of trying to convince her he cared for her, that he loved her, and just when she was starting to believe it he hadn’t shown up for the biggest night of her life.

She’d been pushing him away, secretly wanting him to prove the love he professed to have for her and rejecting any given as yet another trick. She wanted some grand gesture on his part so she’d have no choice but to forgive him. If he’d been there tonight maybe… Whatever she’d hoped for, whatever she’d dreamt might happen between her and Court, it wasn’t going to happen. She needed to face that truth.

Tomorrow she’d begin packing for New York. Somehow she’d force herself to heal and do her best to avoid him until their fiftieth class reunion. Surely she’d be over him by then.

She reached for her purse on the passenger seat and felt the envelope her mother had given her. She opened the car door to turn on the light. She lifted the flap of the envelope and pulled out the photographs Sue-Ellen had taken of her and Court before the reunion cocktail party.

Court almost looked like he was propping her up in the first shot, with his arm around her shoulders. She looked like an annoyed deer caught in headlights. In the second, he was behind her, his head close to hers, his arms wrapped around her.

Jolie stared at the pictures, which somehow seemed symbolic of their relationship. He’d propped her up at the same time he pushed her forward, forcing her to get out of her comfort zone and putting herself out there. He was always there, believing in her, ready to catch her if she fell. Except somehow he’d known she wouldn’t fall. She wouldn’t fail. He’d been so sure of it all along. She bit her lip. Without him, she almost had. She might never have given herself this opportunity with Melina.

She let herself into the house as quietly as she could, although she had no idea whether Court was even home. He usually parked his car in the garage. A light glowed in the living area and the television was on, but the volume was so low Jolie could barely hear anything. She headed for her bedroom thinking the best thing right now was a shower, her favorite pajamas and the covers over her head. Sleep, if there was any justice in the world, would come quickly tonight.

“Jolie.”

She turned at the sound of Court’s voice. He looked as discouraged as she felt.

“Everything go okay?”

“Yes. Fine. I thought—”

“Thought what?”

“I thought you’d be there tonight.”

He looked away. “I told Melina I wouldn’t be.”

“Did you?”

“I didn’t want to ruin your big night.”

“You…you wouldn’t have.”

“I couldn’t take that chance.”

“I looked for you. I wanted you to be there.”

“You did?”

“Uh-huh.” She wouldn’t let herself look away from him. She felt something shift inside. Maybe it was that wall she’d put up and hadn’t been able to get around or over, ever since that morning at the lake. “I needed someone to share it with, you know? But it wasn’t just anyone I wanted. It was you. I wanted to share it with you.”

Court seemed as surprised by her revelation as she was. “You did?”

“I did.”

He took a step closer. “I know it’s not the same, but I’m here now.” His hand slid over her shoulder. A thousand regrets passed through his eyes just before his lips brushed across hers.

She didn’t resist. She was so tired of fighting what she felt for this man—what she’d felt as far back as she could remember even though she’d wasted years refusing to acknowledge it. She wrapped her arms around his neck and thought maybe, just maybe she could spend the rest of her life enjoying who she was when she was with him.

She couldn’t remember how they’d come to be in her bed. She vaguely remembered they’d undressed while they kissed and touched and explored.

He held her as if she was the most precious thing in the world. Every touch brought her pleasure until all she wanted to do was share it with him, please him back. Jolie didn’t understand how lovemaking could be so familiar yet so novel at the same time. She’d known Court forever but sometimes it seemed there was so much more to him. He never said the words but she knew he was trying to tell her that he loved her.

Jolie’s last thought as she drifted into sleep spooned against him was that maybe she wouldn’t have to spend the rest of her life getting over Court after all.

She awoke the next morning awash in blissful feelings. Court was doing his utmost to rouse her, using his hands and lips and tongue all over until she joined in. They came together quickly as if they both realized they needed to make up for all the time they’d wasted. Afterward, Jolie started to drowse again wrapped in Court’s arms.

She didn’t realize he’d left the bed, showered, shaved and dressed until he came back and sat next to her. He played with her hair, rearranging it on the pillow and tickling her ear until she looked up and smiled at him.

“I have to get going.”

“Bummer.” She burrowed back into the pillow.

“Hey,” he said. “Promise you won’t take off before I get back?”

“Promise.”

He pressed his lips against her cheek. She smiled then turned her head and kissed him for real, holding him close.

Chapter Twenty-One

“I can tell you something now, is okay? After last night?” Melina offered Jolie one of her magazine cover smiles. Her skin glowed and her blonde mane fell around her shoulders artlessly. The ring Ricky had given her sparkled and flashed with every move she made.

Jolie nodded. “Sure.”

“I do not think Court can talk you into designing for me. I never think he can talk you into Atlanta. But I was wrong.”

“What?” Sometimes the woman’s inability to grasp past and present tense was confusing to say the least.

Melina shrugged in that way she had when she wanted to relay something that might be of great importance to the other party, but barely registered on her personal radar. “You know why I stay in Atlanta to train? Why I insist designer come here? Because of bet I make with Court. He insist I have talent to win U.S. Open if I work hard enough. Sky is limit after that, he say.” She smiled a self-deprecating smile. “He believe in me.”

An eerie sense of déjà vu washed over Jolie at Melina’s choice of words.

“When you don’t sign first contract because you fight with Court, I think I will have to find another designer. He ruin whole thing. I am so mad I will fire Court.”

“I see.” Jolie was afraid she did see.

“Court say he can change your mind. I don’t believe him, but we make bet.”

“A bet?”

She held her thumb and forefinger together and grinned. “I tell you little white lie. When you call me and say Court is sending your designs?”

Jolie nodded.

“Court already try to convince me to hire you.”

“Melina, what are you saying? How long ago was this?”

Melina shrugged again and reached for a glass of the thick, green concoction she drank every morning. She took a delicate sip and grinned. “First time I tell him I want to do clothes. He has pictures you drew long time ago. Many wedding dresses. I do not want wedding dress designer but he says you can design anything.”

“Court had wedding dress sketches? Of mine?”

“Yes. Some not finished. Wrinkles in paper. I not impressed.”

Jolie stared at Melina.

“He says you very talented. You design more than wedding dresses. You design anything.”

“How would he know?”

Another shrug. “He tell me you are brilliant designer and if I don’t give you chance I am fool. But I not know you are friend he talks about.”

Melina took another sip of her drink, made a face and set the glass on the counter. “When he comes back from his trip he is desperate. He begs me to revise contract. He offers to waive his fee for a year, make better contract for you. Court is good friend, so we make bet.”

“Are you saying Court set this whole thing up? That
he’s
paying me because you don’t have to pay his ten percent for an entire year?”

“I pay you much more than his percentage, but yes. It work out perfect. Court is right. You are perfect for job. He add part to contract about your own line. If you sign, I back you. Everybody win, yes?” Melina grinned, delighted.

Yes
, Jolie thought bitterly.
Everyone but me.

All this time she’d been under the impression that Melina wanted her, that she loved those original designs. But Court had manipulated all of it. Had, in essence, been paying her by forgoing his own fee. He’d been the driving force behind that bonus clause. She’d thought somehow she’d pay him back, but instead he’d made a fool of her again.

She hadn’t thought Court could hurt her more than he already had, but she’d been wrong. After last night she hadn’t thought he’d ever hurt her again. They should have cleared the air before jumping into bed together. She had no idea where she’d go from here, but one thing she did know. It was long past time to have it out with Court.

“Melina, would you excuse me? I have someone I need to kill.”

“Yes, okay. You go.” Melina stood and offered her usual kiss kiss to both Jolie’s cheeks, oblivious to what was just said.

Jolie had never been to Court’s office, but Melina had pointed it out to her as they passed by it once. Jolie drove haphazardly, horns blaring at her as she blindly changed lanes, her foot firmly on the pedal. She was lucky she didn’t get pulled over. Her chest was so tight that by the time she found her way from the parking garage to the eleventh floor of the Peachtree Executive Center she was ready to explode.

She strode past the receptionist and ignored her greeting. Past the assistants’ cubicles, the water cooler, the copy machine and supplies closet. Nameplates flashed by in a blur before she found Court’s corner office.

She shoved the door open so hard it bounced off the wall and slammed behind her as she stepped inside. Court was behind his desk on the phone, but she didn’t care. She didn’t care about anything except this moment.

Even as he was saying, “Let me call you back,” she stalked around the desk and snatched the receiver away, slamming it back in the cradle. He got to his feet just as her fists began to fly. She wanted to make him feel the kind of pain she felt right now. But it wasn’t going to happen. He caught her wrists in his hands. She tried to wrest them free, but he wouldn’t let go.

Her fury died. Tears surged into her eyes and she couldn’t stop them. “Why? Why’d you set me up with Melina? This was all because you had to win some stupid bet you made with her? You let me think she loved my work, that she wanted me—”

“The bet had nothing to do with you. Melina did want you. Badly. And you were about to blow it because of me. I wanted you to give yourself a chance.”

She yanked again against him and this time he let go of his hold on her. She swiped at the hated tears.

“The chance to what? Let you make a fool out of me again?”

“Fool? You were a hit! For God’s sakes, Jolie, I saw every drawing you did from the moment you could color inside the lines until you left for design school. I told you even back then I knew talent when I saw it. You think I doubted what you could do for Melina?”

Jolie stared at him. This wasn’t what she’d expected. She turned, not sure what to think. A framed collage above the sofa across from his desk distracted her, then made her do a double take. She recognized the original drawing she’d done in high school of her dream wedding dress. Frustrated with the less-than-perfect attempt, she’d crumpled it and thrown it away. Court had been there quizzing her for the next day’s chemistry test. He’d smoothed the wrinkles out of the paper and said, “Why are you throwing this away? It’s beautiful.”

She’d already begun sketching another design. “Take it if you like it so much.”

Jolie’s fear had always been that what she’d done wasn’t good enough. She wondered now if that was a metaphor for her and Court. He’d always believed in the two of them. She’d been too ready to throw everything away because she didn’t.

But he’d kept her sketches all these years. Created a collage out of them. Framed it. Displayed it. She took a step closer to the picture. She stared at those bits and pieces of herself that Court had hung onto and finally saw how it all came together.

She turned back to him. “You always thought I had talent.”

“But you didn’t believe in yourself. I had to make you take that chance. Maybe then you’d believe.”

“Believe what?”

“That I love you. That I’m sorry I hurt you. You wouldn’t accept my apology, so I needed something bigger.”

“You manipulated Melina into giving me a second chance.”

“I didn’t manipulate her at all. After you backed out and she found out what I’d done she was mad as hell. She told me I’d never convince you to design for her. That’s when I asked if she wanted to bet on it. I had to try one more time to give you the chance you deserved.”

“You thought if you did I’d forgive you?”

“I hoped, but I didn’t want you to throw everything away just because you wanted to avoid me. Do you have any idea what it’s been like for me having you so close and knowing you hated me? Knowing that I made you hate me?”

Jolie took a step closer. “I do know. How do you think I felt being close to you and thinking you didn’t care? That all you wanted was to pay me back for hurting you.”

“That wasn’t how it started. It just all…went wrong. But honestly, I didn’t think you’d care. It was always so easy for you to walk away from me.”

“I made it look that way, didn’t I?” Jolie asked with a tentative smile.

“I’ve wanted so badly to explain it all to you, but a guy who’s still hung up on the girl next door after ten years? That’s kind of pathetic.”

Jolie reached for his hand. “No, it’s not.”

“I wanted to be over you. I wanted to walk away from you and be done. Start over.”

“But you didn’t,” she said.

Court chuckled. “No…no I didn’t. The only thing I proved to myself is that I never will be. I can say I’m sorry a thousand times, but like you said, I can’t take it back. I don’t know how I can ever make it up to you.”

Jolie slid her arms around his waist. “I think we’ve both got a lot of making up to do. We could start now, couldn’t we?”

“We could.” He touched the locket she wore. “But it might take forever to finish.”

“Yes,” she breathed as she kissed him. “It might.”