Not Stupid (9 page)

The meeting went round and round and round with neither a firm commitment nor a refusal. In the end, a frustrated Sean just blurted out, ‘Look, are you going to f***ing help us or not?’ The chief executive was taken aback. ‘We’ve got to look at things,’ he said. ‘We’re constrained by our constitution… ’ blah, blah, blah – and then he received a mysterious telephone call and had to leave immediately. The meeting, therefore, was over.

He did, though, send us a supportive letter and, afterwards, we became quite friendly with him. Apparently he still remembers our meeting. Thankfully, things have now changed considerably at the society. At the time, we felt they’d become rather dissociated from their core membership – maybe we didn’t meet them at the best of times. They’ve improved vastly since those days. The information they give out nowadays is unrecognisably better than when we first approached them and they’ve worked very hard indeed to put that right. Hats off to all concerned.

However, by chance, a piece of luck went our way. One of the members of HACS, who had a son with autism, knew a bank manager from Barclays and offered to have a word in order to set up a meeting for Sean, Alex and me with him at Barclays’
Harrow branch. James Coombes had been a teacher before life in the world of banking and, I have to say, if it hadn’t been for him I doubt very much we would ever have got a letter from a bank to show Barclays were prepared to lend us
£
627,000 for the refurbishment of Moorcroft in order to get it up and running again. James put an awful lot of thought and work into how we would be able to secure such a large loan and, needless to say, when it was finally agreed, we were over the moon!

Even then we were not home and dry. The next step was to persuade the council to give us permission to go ahead and for them to lease us the building. A meeting of the finance subcommittee was crucial to our proposal but, when Sean and I arrived at the Civic Centre, we were not allowed in. Instead, we waited outside for more than five hours. I was trying to get a microphone through the keyhole in an effort to get some idea of what was happening but it just wouldn’t fit in. At the end of the day, though, it was a subcommittee meeting, not a meeting open to the public, so we had to grin and bear it.

Sean was struggling to hear what was being said behind closed doors and was encouraged when he thought he could hear some councillors expressing a degree of support for our project, even though they had reservations, since there were no models or templates for any similar projects that had gone before. As he said, the Education Act did allow for such a development but the Act itself was so convoluted. We arrived home at midnight with the matter still unresolved – apparently, we still didn’t have enough cash, despite Barclays’ offer.

The negotiations and discussions continued. We were determined not to give up, not after having come so far. It paid
off. Our earlier doubts about whether the council was really on our side were eventually dispelled when we were generously offered a rent-free period for the first five years of a 25 year lease.

First of all, however, the council wanted proof that we could make this a viable proposition. We provided a plan and insisted we would have the school up and running within three years, even though some councillors reckoned we would need five years. We firmly believed in our cause and, in our plan, drew the council’s attention to the three options available to them. They could do nothing, or utilise Moorcroft School by turning it into an educational facility for autistic-spectrum disorders, or create a new purpose-built school that could cost anything in the region of
£
2 million, plus interest. We were convinced our plan would be the most cost-efficient and effective of those three options.

The council had come up trumps after all and, we have to say, we have nothing but admiration for them, and particularly Mary Milne, because we could not have imagined another borough approving such a plan – even though we’d had to fight our corner so hard. I remember Mary telling me afterwards, ‘I always knew you’d do something.’ And it would be remiss of us not to acknowledge the support we received from Labour councillor Peter Ryerson and Conservative councillor Ray Puddifoot who, with MP John Randall, still help us to this day.

What came across to us at the time was that the local authorities were so paralysed. For months they couldn’t seem to make any decision about anything, because nothing like this had been done anywhere, or else it was new territory to those who were doing it, too. It’s just the way local authorities work.
The system doesn’t seem to allow for decision making because there’s such a lot of red tape. Everything’s got to be double-, then triple-checked.

But we must now say a big, big thank-you to Hillingdon Borough Council, because, without any question, we couldn’t have got where we are today without their support. Frustrating as it was at the time, the obstacles put in our way were by a couple of councillors who were very much in the minority.

While securing permission to use the site was a major hurdle to overcome, the small matter of raising enough money to cover all the expenses required was a significant task in itself. Prior to securing the loan from Barclays we had been looking at any way possible to raise funds. I arranged to top up our mortgage – without Sean’s knowledge at the time – which added a huge amount to our monthly outgoings. I knew Sean would have said no, but I was so desperate. When I plucked up the courage to tell him I was surprised when he just said, ‘Oh, all right, then,’ before suggesting he should also ask for voluntary redundancy from Thames Water. It was a bit of a struggle but they gave it to him in the end and even let him have his company car at a cheap price when they heard the reasons for his decision.

Alex, Sean and I decided we needed to do everything in as businesslike a way as possible, and, with Dave Clark, we founded a new company, which became known as Moorcroft Manor Limited. Dave was an invaluable help to us. He had run his own company, which was based next door to where Alex had worked. After speaking with Alex, he had been persuaded to put some time and money into the school
project, which proved particularly useful, bearing in mind his expertise with accounting.

Fundraising and publicity were now taking up a huge amount of our time but it proved very worthwhile, leading to donations large and small, both financial and practical. By taking on a number of sponsored keep-fit sessions, between other parents and myself, we were able to raise
£
20,000 – an amazing sum – and further cash followed after I spoke on LBC, the London radio station, about our hopes for the school. Within moments,
£
845 had been pledged and the phone lines were busy with other people sharing their experiences of living with autistic children, all of which convinced me of the lack of suitable facilities even further afield.

One listener who had an autistic child was on the phone line. She was crying and asked to speak to me afterwards. She told me she had felt so isolated with her problems and that it had helped her so much to have someone like me to talk to. The radio interview also prompted a chap called Nigel Seagrove to get in touch with me. Nigel’s company produced signs. He suggested that, when our school opened, he would be happy to provide us with all the signs we may need free of charge, an offer that was gladly accepted.

By now our cause was receiving a lot of attention. The
Daily
Mail
got in touch and they printed a two-page editorial on us and several other national newspapers and magazines followed suit. I did lots of talks and, from each newspaper article, a number of donations would arrive.

This generated a one-hour television documentary on our efforts to open the school. We were approached by a
producer, Rachel Foster, who was responsible for
Video
Diaries
, a series of programmes screened on BBC2. Rachel asked if I would be willing to provide ongoing recordings of our efforts to gain permission to acquire the school, right up to the point, should we be successful, of gaining the keys. Rachel asked me to leave a camera running and all I would have to do was to record the date and the time, and they would show me how to do cutaways.

The recordings, taken over a six-month period, were eventually edited down to two hours and then had to be cut even further down to an hour before I visited the studio to record the voiceover. The programme, entitled
Not Stupid
, aired in 1999 and took the form of a fly-on-the-wall documentary featuring all that was going on in our lives at the time. Patrick and Angelo were shown displaying signs of their challenging behaviour, Angelo having a tantrum when told he couldn’t wear his dirty clothes and Patrick getting upset, first at being filmed and, later, protesting loudly about having to go to a summer play scheme.

The video then showed me walking around Moorcroft School and the extent of all the work it required. It showed Sean and me drawing up our business plan and proposals to Hillingdon Borough Council to set up what we hoped would become one of the largest specialist schools for autistic children in Europe.

The pressure Sean and I were under at this time was abundantly clear in the programme. With Angelo keeping us awake almost all night, every night, and the anxiety and stress we experienced in trying to secure use of the school, it’s hardly surprising I looked absolutely worn out.

At least the video gave us the opportunity to put over the potential of some of the sufferers on the autistic spectrum. Earlier scenes had shown Patrick upset and declaring, ‘I’m stupid, stupid, stupid!’ Yet later ones showed him talking about his passion – dinosaurs – in great detail and with expertise. Furthermore, a fundraising concert by the brilliant autistic pianist Mark Bishop was included in the final cut, and that must have gone a long way in convincing the television viewers that some sufferers can lead very rewarding and fulfilling lives.

The boys and I were fortunate enough to be invited to the set of the BBC1 soap
EastEnders
in Barnet, north London. Rachel suggested we meet up with the actress Daniela
Denby-Ashe
, who, at the time, played Sarah in the soap and whose brother, Adam, has Asperger Syndrome. Rachel felt an interview to share our experiences with Daniela would slot nicely into the documentary.

While getting the boys ready for the trip I asked Patrick where he thought we were going.

‘Out,’ he replied.

‘Yes,’ I said, ‘but who do you think we’re going to see?’

He still didn’t get it so I began humming the familiar
EastEnders
theme tune to give him a clue.

‘We’re going to
Coronation Street
!’ he declared excitedly.

Well, that part of the documentary fell onto the
cutting-room
floor!

It was fascinating to see behind the scenes of such a famous soap. Apart from Daniela, we met Adam Woodyatt, who plays Ian Beale, Barbara Windsor, who plays Peggy Mitchell, and Michael Greco and Marc Bannerman, who played Beppe and
Gianni di Marco respectively. The set was absolutely huge. The frontage of all the houses in the fictional area known as Albert Square in Walford are all brick-built but are only a façade – there’s nothing behind them. We passed a number of large trolleys, each of which carried flat-pack rooms with labels such as ‘Ian’s room’ and ‘Pat’s room’ affixed to them.

Daniela was full of praise for what we had been trying to achieve and it was really nice to meet her, even though it was freezing cold and windy. All was going well until Angelo delivered a truly messy sneeze all over Daniela’s dress. I just wanted to die on the spot, I was so embarrassed, particularly when we realised no one had a tissue on them and I found myself frantically trying to clean her up by using a large leaf from a nearby tree! Fortunately, though, she was absolutely fine about it and just carried on telling me more about her family’s experiences with her brother Adam.

But that was hardly the end of our eventful day. On the way home I spotted a Woolworth’s store and decided to pop in. Patrick wandered off for a look around while I stayed with Angelo in his buggy. Suddenly Angelo spotted some Easter eggs wrapped up like footballs and demanded not one but all of them! When I said no, he went bananas, trying to wriggle out of his buggy and screaming loudly. I could feel the eyes of all the other shoppers looking in our direction. Angelo began to get even more hysterical and loud, so I lifted him from the buggy and tucked him under my arm with the intention of bundling him and Patrick back in the car as quickly as possible. Patrick, though, had other ideas when I called him to follow me.

‘No, I’m looking at the DVDs!’ he protested.

‘Patrick, come here!’

‘No, I want to see the DVDs!’

‘Patrick, come here now!’

‘I hate you!’

‘I don’t care, just get in the car!’

By the time I’d got the boys strapped into their seats, I was stressed out and sweating profusely. I remember spending the next five minutes driving around unfamiliar roads with the boys going completely mad in the back.

‘I hate you!’ screamed Patrick again as Angelo was frantically trying to undo his safety straps and yelling his head off.

God help me! I thought. I was almost at the end of my tether and my head felt as if it was about to explode.

I have to admit being glad when the filming of the
Video
Diaries
episode was over. I’d built myself up for it and had been really worried about how it would come out. I was particularly concerned as to how the children would appear. They are not all like the guy featured in the movie
Rain Man
. They each have their own characters – funny, witty and bright.

For three days after the screening I received more than 50 telephone calls from parents of autistic children. Some rang to say they’d had no idea what we’d had to go through, and one mother, after having seen me getting up so often in the night to tend to Angelo, reckoned she wouldn’t have been able to cope and said she’d have had to send him to a residential school and gone on Prozac!

A further
£
4,000 was donated to our cause by viewers after
Video
Diaries
was screened and the producer also gave us
£
1,000 for our efforts in making the programme. Then I wrote to McDonald’s charity division, who gave us
£
5,000, and a group of Indian ladies whom I taught dance and keep-fit suggested we hold an Indian evening at a local community centre, which proved to be a huge success and further boosted our coffers – one lady even handed me a
£
50 note after I gave a speech outlining what we were trying to do. A
£
1,000 donation from Capital Radio’s Help a London Child Appeal followed, as did several television interviews. I think I gave 18 of them altogether.