Nothing But Time (9 page)

Sleep
did
n’t come to
Kate
at all that night.  Instead
,
she
lay
awake replaying those moments with the earl, wondering what had come over her…and him f
or that matter, if what he
said was true.  In truth, her own raging desires kept her awake as much as her thoughts.  Her limbs trembled with desire each time
she played that kiss over in her
mind.  The overwhelming nearness of his body next to hers, not even touching but affecting nonetheless as if his sensuality radiated out from him and she had stepped within its sphere of influence.  After experiencing his kiss and the feel of his hands, she could only imagine that the aura would be even wider when she next met him.

How different he was f
rom the men she had dated!  They were boys in comparison.  Truly most had only been
boys
.  The college boys she’d dated in school, the twenty-somethings she’d dated in graduate school
were all wet behind the ears in comparison
.  Even David Fergusson
, despite being closer in age to the earl, was nothing but a boy in contrast.  Maybe that was why those brief relationships had never been serious, why they never lasted. 

Harrowby was something different, something new.  She liked his
confidence, the self-assurance he exuded.  And, though the idea should have offended her modern sensibilities,
Kate
liked the way he took what he wanted.  There had been
n
o tentativeness in his kiss.  He wanted.  He took.  It should have seemed presumptuous and barbaric, but instead it had sent a shiver of excitement up her spine.

Wow, she was completely losing it!  Kate shook her head and turned on her side careful not to disturb Nan
with whom
she shared
a bed.  She shouldn’t be s
o taken by a man who behaved that way, but she was.  Now Kate looked back at the fumbling encounters
of her past
that were, to date, the summation of her sexual experience and wondered what it would be like to have a man as masterful as Harrowby in her bed.

***

Sleep might not have come but
,
inevitably
,
the morning did
.  While the others went into Henley to attend church, Kate puttered around the dormitory
worrying over
whether she was about to lose her job or not.  Granted, she didn’t actually need the work but
she
wanted – no!
needed – the independence it gave her.  Surely, her behavior the night before had sounded a death toll on her job though
Hendricks hadn’t
summoned her
yet
.  Still,
Kate
could feel the tension building inside of her waiting for the axe to drop for surely she was going to be sacked by the earl for her insolence.

In truth, Kate knew she probably deserved to be fired.  She
hadn’t given
Harrowby
one o
u
nce of the respect she would normally give her employer.  She hadn’t used his title at all and had lectured him without censoring her words.  While his own behavior would be suspect in her own time, this was
his
time
. 
Harrowby was an earl.  S
urely he was used to getting bowed down to and wouldn’t take her behavior without reprimand.

So
Kate
waited and waited for a summons from the housekeeper wondering all the while where she could go from here.  To the fact
ories, she supposed, unless Low
ry took her dismissal as a sign that she was beyond redemption. 
Either way it meant a trip back to
David
’s house, back to expectations that made her weak with dread and boredom enough to eat away at her soul.

T
he morning stretched
on
and
Kate
’s nerves grew tau
t. 

Waiting.

Late in the morning, the other women returned
from church
and changed to go into Henley
for the afternoon
.  W
ith a sigh of relief, Kate pulled
on her bonnet
,
as she knew was expected,
prepared to leave her worries behind for a few hours as she
joined
Marta, Mary and Nan.  They were just about to leave thro
ugh the kitchen entrance when an authoritative
voice broke through the female chatter.

“I’d like a word with you, if you don’t mind.”

***

Harrowby
had gotten little sleep the night before
,
nursing a brandy before a fire in his bedchamber until nearly dawn as he considered his encounter with the maid
. 
His aberrant behavior had disturbed him for, as he had said, it was beyond his normal manner to dally with the help.  After the encounters of his early manhood, he hadn’t needed to
,
as lovers were always plentiful when desired.

After
finally finding sleep as the sun came up
, he slept
until noon
with dreams of heated embraces and entangled bodies haunting him
. 
Dreams that disturbed him almost as much as his actions the previous evening.

Outside vague excuses, he was
appalled by his departure from honorable form
.  H
e was also disgusted that he hadn’t even gotten to an exchange of names before he’d started kissing the woman and
that
was certainly out of character for him.

What was it that had lured him to
these uncharacteristic behaviors
? 
There was something about that maid that lingered with him, something different than he’d previously experienced.  She
was a beauty to be sure, but he had known women lovelier and certainly more pleasant.  W
omen w
ho
enticed with soft words and softer hands. 
However,
those women were professionals or ladies of the
ton
who set themselves up to be the mistresses of many a lord over time.  While he might have mistaken the maid’s eager response for experience,
Harrowby
didn’t feel now that she had ever made an occupation of it.  There had been no pretense in her, just honest attraction.

Perhaps it had
been that which
tempted him
.  There had been no charade of
his desirability about her.  It
hadn’t seemed as if she wanted anything from him be it payment, status or victory.  She hadn’t looked at him and seen his title first, it seemed to him that she had seen nothing more than a man.  And that hadn’t happened in months.

As a boy,
the new earl
had never expected to inherit the title of Harrowby and all that went with it.  His uncle’s marriage had spawned several daughters and even a son
.  It wasn’
t until that son
had died from the measles in his early teens that Brand had even considered his place in the
succession
for the earldom.  By then, Harrowby’s countess had been past her childbearing year
s and about ten years ago, hi
s uncle had finally declared
Brand
on Ryder
as his heir.

Things had changed for him then.  He’d gone from simple Mr. Brandon Ryder to a gentleman with prospects.  A man with a future of
influence and
wealth
as
well since
the
earldom
was an old and rich one
. 
He
emerged as
one of the
ton’s
most eligible bachelors and
,
given his status as the only male heir of the earl, was
fully
expected to marry and produce its next generation
in all haste
.

Once he’d left Oxford and entered Society, he had been openly pursued and for the past ten years had not been able to attend any soci
al function without being subject
to assumptions
t
hat he entering
the Marriage Mart.
He had been inundated with offers and proposals from gentlemen and lords alike
,
each one hoping
for a title for their daughter
.  It wasn’t just English women pursuing him either.  Since the American heiress Jenny Jerome had
wed the son of the D
uke of Marlborough just two years before, the marriage mart had been flooded by young American heiresses seeking titles and status in exchange for immense wealth.  They coveted a title even more greatly than the English misses might. 

This Season had proven to be the worst yet now that he was no longer
merely an
heir but
rather
Earl of
Harrowby
. 
In the few months since gaining his title,
Harrowby
had been subject to more tittering
,
chattering and kowtowing from women tha
n
he could bear. 
No one expected a proper mourning period from him considering the continued lack of a successor.  He was invited everywhere. 
When he entered a room, women began bobbing up and down in a frenzy of nervous curtseys that set his teeth on edge.  But despite this maid’s feeble attempt at that simple courtesy, Brand had known she didn’t view him as an earl, a noble or even her superior as her employer. 
Even
other American women
showed
him
suitable deference
, so it wasn’t just her nationality.

She looked at him in a way he hadn’t been looked at in a decade. 

Not as a prize, but as a man.

And, damn, he didn’t even know her name!  Knew nothing at all about her other than she was American and new at her position
here.  That was all
.  But how was he to know more without invading her ‘personal space’, as she put it?  Without seeming too inter
ested in a woman in his employ.

He couldn’t simply ask Mrs. Hendricks about her.  The old housekeeper had cowed him as a youth and retained that ability into his adult years.  He was likely to shuffle his feet and stammer nervously if he attempted to put the inquiry to her.  Even knowing he was an earl now would not put a halt to that.  He’d not even been able to stay in the hall the previous afternoon to meet all the servants because of that old woman…
a circumstance he now regretted.

His only recourse then would be to set aside this maid’s command to leave her alone and seek her out
,
setting not only her wishes but his own good sense aside.  Truly
,
Harrowby
was not interesting in pursuing the woman
as a sexual conquest or partner
.  He had been quite serious when he’d told her that he didn’t engage in affairs with his staff.  Logically he knew he should just let the issue go
, remain outside of her ‘personal space’
and leave her to her work
since
he
had no intentions of castigating her for her impertinence of the previous evening.  Even if he did, it was not his duty to perform.  As earl, he would simply pass that order down to Hendricks and let her see it done.

No, he should just leave the woman be.  It was a monstrous old house.  He could likely go for months before he saw her again.

Yes, he would just leave her be.

“I’d like a word with you, if you don’t mind.” 
Harrowby
’s voice broke through the laughter and silence descended in the kitchens as everyone turned and looked at him.  Everyone except the maid he’d met the previous evening.  She didn’t look about at all.  Instead, she tilted her head back to stare at the ceiling as if she were praying for strength.

The other maids all bobbed
a
nervous curts
ey
as they shared curious looks wondering which of them was being summoned.  “W-who, my lord?”
One of them, bolder than the others, asked
.

Again reminded that he didn’t even know the name of the woman he’d been kissing in the library,
the earl
fought back his own flush of embarrassment and gestured sternly to
her.

Marta poked Kate in the ribs and, with a sigh, Kate turned back and
reluctantly
pulled off her bonnet.  Stalling, she took her time handing it over to Marta.

Here it was.  The sacking.

I
n her entire working career
,
Kate had never been called before the boss
and it was humiliating for it to be happening now in front of everyone. 
She
had a good
,
respectable employment history and had worked responsibly in every position she’d ever had from the front counter at Burger King to her internship at the CDC.  All her bosses had had nothing but good things to say about her efforts and work ethic and Kate wasn’t about to let a step down take those basic qualities from her.  She’d worked hard since she’d been here
,
determined not to let Hend
ricks have a reason to fire her
and then, in one night, she’d given this man a multitude of reasons to do so.

Kate offered Marta a tight smile.  “You go on, Marta.  I’ll catch up with you later.” 
When I have all the time in the world to waste. 

“Are ye sure ye don’t want us to wait?” Marta whispered nervously.

“I’ll be fine.”  Kate patted her arm and followed after the earl as he turned and led the way out of the kitchens and
on a long walk through a half dozen other rooms
.

It was a long way and Kate felt the distance like a Dead Man’s Walk with only her execution awaiting her at the end.  Her
heart was pounding
by the time they reached the earl’s private study. 
Harrowby closed the door behind them and gestured to a chair near the desk but
Kate couldn’t do it. 
Instead
,
she stared dazedly around the room not really seeing the details but just feeling the impression of the dark paneling and neutral décor.  A man’s room.  Her boss’s office.  Kate shook her head in self-disgust. 
She had never been fired
before and d
idn’t want to be fired now.  She stood in front of the desk staring
down at it
when he spoke behind her.

“
I didn’t get your name last night,”
Harrowby
spoke softly into
the room. 
Internally he couldn’t help but curse himself for giving in to his baser urges after only a few hours
’
resolve.

At first, the maid didn’t
speak but after
a moment, to his surprise
and no little offense
, she
turned away from him to stare out the window
.  “Didn’t get yours either,” she said conversationally as if she were unaware that she had left him flabbergasted.

“I am Harrowby,” he finally answered
, his voice reflecting the nobility of the position
.

“And I am fairly certain that that isn’t actually your name,” she answered finally
,
giving him a glance over her shoulder.  Her green eyes danced
for a brief moment before a shadow descended over them
.

“Brandon.
”
T
he word
emerged sounding almost awkward as if
it had
been forced out or lon
g unused and
Harrowby
supposed it
had.  Even before gaining the title
of Earl
, few people had ever referred to him by his given name
including his parents
. 
H
e
had been
Mr. Ryder to almost everyone.  Most
men he considered
friends referred to him as Ryder but he felt compelled to add, “
A few
of my
old
friends call
ed
me Brand.”

She turned again meeting his gaze from across the room, this time
twisting her hands
unconsciously.  Other than that small sign of discomfort, she did not fidget or even shift on her feet.  “
Kate
,” she replied finally.  “Or
Katie
, if you’re inclined.”

Katie
seemed much too tame and girlish to
Harrowby
for a woman of her
seemingly strong measure of self-
confidence
so
Kate
it would be.  “
Just Kate?”

“Kate Kallastad.”

“That’s an unusual surname.  Danish?”

“Norwegian,” Kate corrected.

Surveying her dark hair and snapping green eyes,
Harrowby
couldn’t help but add
,
“You don’t look Norwegian
, Miss Kallastad
.”

“Only down my father’s side.  According to my mom’s research,
I’m what you might call a mutt.
”
Kate shrugged with a
hesitant
smile.  “A little bit of everything all mixed together.
  I’ve got some German in me, French, Irish but there’s a little English in there
,
to
o
.
”

“Ahh,
a result of the emigration to America by so many around the world, I assume
.”

“Yes.
”
Kate looked at the earl curiously.  “
In g
rade school history, they refer
to it as the Great American Melting Pot. 
I suppose that offends your blue-blooded sensibilities.”
 

The earl
shook his head.  No, there was nothing at all about her that offended his sensibilities.  She might have been a gypsy outcast and he would have still found her appealing.
  It wasn’t as if she would be the mother of his children, after all.  He simply wanted her.  Again, he felt the inappropriateness of the attraction
and wondered at his own motives for instigating this meeting
.  “
I would like to apologize for last night
,
Miss Kallastad
.”

She tilted her head slightly accepting the offer.  “Me, too.  I shouldn’t have accused you like that.  It wasn’t fair to you given what I h
ad already…ummm, so are you going
to fire me then?”

“Fire you?”

“You know?  Sack me.  Give me the boot?”  Her normally bold gaze was shadowed by dread and Brand was almost
saddened
to see her formidable self-assurance waver.

“Not at all,” he hastened to assure her.  “What is past is past.  We will let it rest.”

Kate
’s shoulders sagged for a moment in relief. 
What had she been thinking talking back to him like that
when she was already on the chopping block
? 
Didn’t get your
s
either
?   Was she trying to give him even more reason to fire her? 
The worries of the day
must have
dragged her down
past
a
point of exhaustion
beyond her labors and lack of rest
if that was the best she could do at guarding her tongue
. 

Talk like that w
ould only lead to
the uncomfortable circumstance of having to go back to
David
.  He would smile knowingly that she’d been fired, maybe even mock her inability to hack it in this job.  Then she would be forced to live with him again, to feel with weight of his expectations on her.  Even if Lowry
gave her another position, the others hadn’t
come with room and board. 
This was the position that guaranteed those things.  This one. 

Thank God, she hadn’t been fired!  The earl looked as regretful as she felt and
Kate
figured that she better get on the ball with learning her new place in this world lest she risk
another moment that would leave her future in peril.  She needed to be nice to this man.  Treat him as she would any other boss she’d ever had.  She
’d
not give Mrs. Hendricks or the
earl any reason to think less of her. 
Not when s
he’d worked like a dog to prove it to the housekeeper and to herself that she could excel in this endeavor as she had done in everything else she’d done.

“Thank you…
my lord.
”
T
he words emerged haltingly in a way that demonstrated she was very unused to them.  “I appreciate that sincerely.”

“Enough of that now.
”
Harrowby
shook his head.
Though his words were forgiving, the
tone held
more of a brittle command than an absolution. 
He went on,
“Any fool can see that you know nothing of British hierarchy if you falter over simple titles.  Do you even know the different forms of address?  No, don’t take offense,” he said
,
as if he saw the argument coming from her.  “Just ask one of the others to help you with it.  Not for me, but for your own benefit, yes?”

“Okay,”
Kate
relented.  “You’re right.  I know nothing about it at all.  I’ve only been in England for a few months.  It’s all pretty new to me.” 

An understatement to say the least.

“Where are you from?”
Still,
there was
that
odd
, crisp
solemnity to his voice, but Kate could hear the curiosity beneath it
. 
Hands locked behind his back like Captain Bl
igh
on the deck of the
Bounty
, h
e strolled
further
into the room,
in command of
his private space
. 
In his neat suit
, razor-edged creases to his trousers
and with his hair tamed, he looked nothing like the animalistic male who had prowled the library floor the night before.  Harrowby looked as much the earl as he had when arriving the previous afternoon, contained and austere. 

Harrowby moved to a pair of chairs
near the fireplace
indicating
that she should
take
one with a gesture of his hand
. 
Kate
shook her head hesitantly, her eyes darting toward the
closed
door
.  Better to en
d this with her job still intact
, she thought
, but
the earl
insisted.  “Please
,
sit
.”

Kate
took a seat perching
just on the edge
thinking again that t
his earl was nothing like the man she’d met the previous night, she thought.  That sensual man in the library – before she offended him at least – had been relaxed and sexy.  Though he was still magnificently
handsome, there was a stiffness
to
his posture and vocal infle
ction that Kate was uncertain how to deal with.

When he sat, it was on the edge of his seat, his back straight with one leg bent just a bit farther back than the other reminding Kate of old paintings showing the signing of the Declaration of Independence.  Formal, even in casual conversation
, yet… wired
.
It was as if his
raw masculinity was contained within the confines of his proper morning suit but only just barely.  Kate could feel the energy radiating from him. 
Whether it was his rank or just this time in general
that provided that odd combination
, Kate wasn’t certain.