On the Line (33 page)

“Mother,” Janelle said calmly. Mary’s words struck deeply and Janelle was trying
not to let it show.

“Don’t ‘Mother’ me,” Mary hissed. “I’m ashamed of your behavior, Janelle. I raised
you to be better than this. I raised you to take care of your husband or suffer the
consequences. You ignored me and deserved everything he did to you.”

Janelle gasped and drew back.

“That’s enough,” Nathan snapped from the doorway. McClane, standing beside his leg,
quietly bared his teeth at Mary. “The way I see it, you taught your daughters to
be doormats and never expect to be treated as anything more. Nobody deserves the
kind of abuse they’ve received.”

Mary wheeled around to face him. “First, this is none of your concern. If you think
you have any place in my daughter’s life, you’re mistaken. I’ll make sure of that.
Second, Richard didn’t abuse Kelsey, and any cruelty he displayed toward Janelle
was because of her own actions.”

“I wasn’t referring to Richard’s abuse, I was talking about yours,” Nathan said calmly,
his eyes glittering with anger, all directed at Mary.

Mary’s jaw dropped as she glanced over her shoulder at Janelle then slowly returned
her focus to Nathan. “How dare you accuse me of such a thing? I would never say or
do anything to hurt my daughters.”

Janelle rolled her eyes and shook her head as she rose to her feet. She slowly walked
around her mother and toward Nathan.

“Every vitriolic word I just heard from your mouth would suggest otherwise,” Nathan
growled.

Janelle stopped by his side and slipped her hand into his. He squeezed it in acknowledgment
as she turned to look at her mother. “He’s not going
anywhere, get used to it,” she
said softly, drawing her courage from his support. “I have a feeling you’ve said
everything, maybe even more than, you came here to say. If you haven’t, I don’t want
to hear it.”

Mary’s eyes widened as her mouth fell open and her cheeks became splotched with red.
Janelle nudged Nathan and McClane backward, out of the doorway.

“You should go now.” Janelle calmly motioned toward the door.

Mary closed her gaping mouth and pulled her shoulders back. She refused to make eye
contact with Janelle or Nathan as she strode past them. Before she walked out of
the front door, over her shoulder she said, “You’ll be sorry,” then continued on,
slamming both door and screen door behind her.

When Janelle heard the tires of her mother’s car squeal out of the driveway, she
turned into Nathan’s arms. He held her against him, and she relished the feeling
of security and strength he gave her. Hot tears rose to her eyes as she wrapped her
arms around his neck. As her vision blurred, she saw Kelsey, her eyes wide as she
stared toward the front door and stood like a sentry in front of the kids. Janelle
closed her eyes and turned her face into Nathan’s neck.

“Thank you,” she murmured.

Twenty-Three

Two nights later, Nathan held Janelle in her bed, his eyes closed as his heart rate
slowly returned to normal. She lightly traced circles on his bare chest with her
fingertips, and he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. After a few minutes, her
hand flattened on his chest and she propped herself up on her elbow.

“Do you think we should tell the kids?” she asked as she stilled her hand on his
waist.

He raised an eyebrow, not sure what she was talking about. “Tell them what?”

“About us,” she answered.

“What about us?” He fought not to grin too widely, but the thrill of her question
raced all the way to his toes.

She rolled her eyes. “That we’re dating,” she replied as her brow furrowed. “We are
dating, aren’t we?”

Nathan mimicked her posture as he turned to face her. He placed his hand on her naked
hip. “Technically, no, since we haven’t actually gone out in public. Otherwise, I
would say yes. Would the kids understand that, though?”

“I’m not sure.” She frowned and flopped onto her back. Nathan’s hand slid to her
stomach and he inched closer. “I just hate that you have to leave before they get
out of bed every morning so they won’t see you. I want them to not be surprised if
you’re here when they get up. But then, I don’t know if it would even occur to them
as odd or out of place. I’m probably worrying—”

He silenced her with a kiss, and her hand immediately went to the back of his head.
She held him to her and returned his innocent kiss with an excitement that warmed
him thoroughly. He slowly pulled away and she pouted as he looked down into her wide
blue eyes.

“Yes, you are worrying too much,” Nathan murmured.

Her lips relaxed and turned slightly upward.

“That’s not exactly what I was going to say.”

“I’ll bet it was close enough.”

She laughed out loud as her head bobbed up and down. “Close enough,” she agreed and
placed her hand on his arm that stretched across her body.

“We could just say we’re boyfriend and girlfriend,” Nathan suggested and Janelle’s
lip curled. “You don’t like that idea?” he asked.

Janelle shook her head. “It sounds so schoolish.” She paused and slowly her head
moved from side to side. “I guess we could do that, I’ve got nothing better.”

He’d waited fifteen years, since they were seniors in high school, to call her his
girlfriend. The idea still excited him; the reality was better than he could have
imagined, but he couldn’t shake the memories of her nightmares and her mother’s words
from his mind.

“Do you think we’re moving too fast?” he asked.

Janelle took a deep, considerate pause and shook her head. “I should think that,
shouldn’t I?” She sounded honest and contemplative, not full of the self-loathing
he’d been expecting. “But I don’t.” She met his gaze and he fell into the deep pools
of blue and felt refreshed. “The truth is, this feels more right to me than being
with him ever did. When you and I made love last week, it was like coming back from
a hiatus and falling right back into normal.”

Nathan could hardly contain the smile on his lips. She reached up and placed her
palm on his cheek.

“I never should have pushed you away,” she muttered as he kissed the heel of her
hand. She smiled sadly as she stared into his eyes.

“Doesn’t matter,” he said softly. “We’re together now, that’s what’s important.”

“True,” she muttered quietly, and her stare became thoughtful and curious. “What
did you mean last week?”

He pressed his lips together and remained silent. He would need more clarification
than that if she expected an answer.

“When you said you’d wanted me for fifteen years. What did you mean by that?” She
rolled to her side again so they were face to face.

“What do you think I meant?” he asked with a chuckle. “How else does a man want a
woman?”

She frowned. “You wanted me like that in high school?”

“Yes and no,” Nathan answered truthfully. She pursed her lips, and he could tell
she still wasn’t happy with his answer. “I wanted to date you, Jan. At some point
during junior year, I think it was, I realized I had a crush on you. By the time
we were seniors, I thought I was in love with you. I was wrong, of course, but it
still took me a while to work up the courage to ask you out.”

“Why? We were friends.” Janelle propped herself up a little higher.

“Exactly. We were friends and I valued your friendship. I didn’t want to screw that
up,” he said. She nodded her understanding but remained quiet. A few minutes passed
before he felt the silence was becoming awkward. “Don’t you want to know how I know
I was wrong back then?”

She shook her head and averted her gaze. “I’m glad you didn’t ask me out then.” Her
words punched him in the gut.

“Why would you say that?” he asked with a frown.

“Because I would have rejected you,” she answered softly. “And that would have ruined
our friendship, and I didn’t want that to happen.”

“You’ve thought about this recently?” Nathan turned and propped himself against the
headboard. “That’s harsh.”

“No, I considered it then,” Janelle answered and peeked at him from under her lashes.
“You always treated me differently, and I think the thought flitted through my mind
once or twice, but you never brought it up, so I didn’t dwell on it. I didn’t know
what else to do.”

“I’m not sure I’m following your logic. Are you saying that I was only good enough
to be your friend and nothing more?” Nathan had the urge to put his feet on the floor
and leave the room before she could cause any more damage to his ego.

She slid closer and placed her arm around the front of his waist. “No, just hear
me out before you bolt, please.” It was almost frightening the way they could read
each other. He guessed that’s what knowing a woman for most of her life could do
for you. Nathan nodded and she inhaled slowly.

“You scared me,” she said as she released the air from her lungs.

“Not helping,” he retorted.

She raised an eyebrow as she stared at him. “You’ve met my mother, you are well aware
of her logic and the way she thinks Kelsey and I should act around men.”

Nathan bit his tongue against his opinion of her mother’s logic.

“You didn’t fit her mold, and therefore I didn’t know how to handle you.” She lowered
her head. “I know that probably doesn’t make sense, but it did to me at the time.
Mom had drilled into my head from a very early age that I was supposed to anticipate
a man’s needs before he did, I was supposed to cater to his wants and forget about
mine. I should not let any insensitive remark he might make affect me and should
learn not to let the hurt show.” Janelle pushed herself upward until her head was
propped on his shoulder and her hand splayed on his chest. “You always anticipated
my
needs, you always cared about
my
wants. You didn’t fit her mold. I remember having
lunch with you once and muttering under my breath that I’d forgotten napkins and
you got up and got them for me. You would get ice cream for yourself and bring an
extra to me.”

Nathan smiled slightly and began to relax as she took him down memory lane.

“Do you remember, I think it was tenth grade, I was standing at the door of Ramsey
Hall, watching the downpour outside, contemplating skipping class because I had to
walk across the parking lot to the vocational building?” She began to laugh. “I never
saw you coming, but suddenly you were behind me and had the umbrella opened over
our heads before you shoved me out into the rain and we ran all the way to the other
building. Then you had to run all the way to the gym before the bell rang.”

“I barely made that bell,” Nathan said as he put an arm around her. “I’m still not
seeing why I scared you.”

“I didn’t know how to react to you,” Janelle answered. “I was seventeen and naïve.
Even then I had this picture in my head of how a man should act, domineering, selfish,
inconsiderate of my needs or wants, everything that Richard was. You were none of
those things, and I didn’t know how to deal with it.”

It physically hurt Nathan to hear how low her expectations were. In his opinion,
she’d always deserved the very best, and to hear what her mother had
taught her daughters
to expect from the men in their lives was heartbreaking. It was almost a wonder that
she was dating him now.

“Was your father like that when you were younger?” Nathan asked.

“No, but my grandfather was. Mom grew up expecting Dad to act just like her father
had but he wasn’t that kind of man. I think I even pointed that out to her once and
her response was . . . ” Janelle lifted her nose, pressed her lips together, and
prepared her best impression of her mother, “‘If I didn’t treat him so well, he would
be.’” She lowered and shook her head. “The problem was that I was young and naïve,
and I didn’t realize my mother’s mistake and how different my father was until I
was much older. Kelsey and I have both spent the entirety of our adulthood trying
to unlearn those early lessons.” Janelle looked up at him and gave him a sweet smile.
“Thank you for not fitting her mold.”

The corner of Nathan’s lip lifted slightly. “You’re welcome. Are you just starting
to appreciate that?”

She shook her head. “No, I’ve appreciated it for a while. Do you remember that night
you brought
Steel Magnolias
to the house and watched it with me?”

Nathan bobbed his head.

“I realized that night how special you were to me. I saw you as the man you were,
the man you’d always been, and stopped seeing the boy I grew up with.” Her cheeks
turned slightly pink and she looked down. “I’m pretty sure I fell in love with you
that night,” she murmured.

Nathan’s heart skipped a beat. “What did you say?”

She looked back up at him, her eyes glowing in the soft light of the table lamp behind
her. “You heard me,” she replied with a smirk.

“I can’t believe you said it first. I was expecting to have to drag it from you in
a year or so.” Nathan laughed as she sat up and scowled at him. She swatted his hand
as he reached for her, and he ignored it as he flipped her onto her back underneath
him. She squeaked her protest, even as she began to giggle. He lowered his head and
she placed her fingers on his lips.

“Stop for just a second,” she said and removed her hand after he nodded. “Maybe I
should have waited for you to say it, but I think I’ve always known how you felt.
You make me feel safe. You make me feel wanted. You make
me feel loved. I needed
to say it first because I wasn’t sure you’d believe me if I waited. I’ve abused your
trust before. I didn’t want to give you any reason to doubt me now.”

“I could never doubt you.” He placed a soft kiss on her forehead. “I love you more
now than I ever thought possible. Our past may not have been perfect but it got us
to where we are today.” He placed a firmer kiss on her cheek. “And our future is
ahead of us, all we have to do is grab it.”

Janelle smiled widely at him and he was lost. He would never want to look at another
face like this. She’d officially ruined him for anyone else.