Authors: Piper Vaughn
guy to take his clothes off. Not sure about the logic
there, since the girls didn’t do a damn thing for
me… but there was logic. I hoped.
I looked up when the line moved again,
hoping I was at least almost to the register. I
needed the caffeine like nothing else. But instead
of seeing the counter like I was hoping, I saw a
bleached blond head on a petite guy,
right there in
front of me!
Black tank top, plaid shorts, and flip-
flops. My pulse raced.
It’s him.
It was the guy, that one from the street all
those weeks ago. I hadn’t been able to forget him.
When he’d stumbled and I touched him, God, the
shock had zapped me hard. I’d stared, barely able
to squeeze out a few little words, then chickened
out and walked away. Of course, with that fine
performance, I felt dumb getting so excited. After
all, it was just a moment, nothing more. But that
moment had felt special.
He’d
felt special. I lifted
my hand, ready to touch his shoulder, give him my
number, ask him if he wanted to spend the day with
me, the night, however long he wanted… but then
the guy turned around.
And it wasn’t him. It was never him.
I had my hand raised, ready to touch, and the
poor guy who had zero idea who I was looked at
me like I was crazy. Then he smiled a bit, winked,
and cocked his head like he was going to be
waiting outside for a little fun. Definitely not him. I
ordered my coffee and left from the other exit. Not
interested.
On my way home from the non-encounter, I
mailed off yet another application. It wasn’t
anything special, just a small-potatoes travel
magazine that needed a new staff photographer.
Even if the pay wasn’t fantastic, I’d be off on trips
fairly regularly. If nothing else, I wouldn’t mind
some time away from Archer.
“OKAY, so here’s the drill. I’m going to do a few
of you clothed, then we’ll do some shots in your
briefs, then get into the nude shots.” I felt like I had
said it a thousand times. The only difference was
the boobs, or lack thereof. His name was Josh. He
was pretty, in a super-twink kinda way—tanned,
blond in all the right places, waxed, I was sure,
from here to eternity. He looked the part for damn
sure. I imagined they’d put him with girls who’d
play his “girlfriend” in bobby socks and pleated
skirts. Why people were into the kids was beyond
me.
He was perfect, but the poor thing was still
nervous.
“Do you want me to sit on the bed? Like with
my clothes on?”
“Actually, let’s take a few shots on the
armchair.
Take
your
flip-flops
off.
Get
comfortable, like you’re daydreaming about some
hot girl.”
I was looking for that smile. The one that said
“I want sex.” Not the one that said “I’m terrified as
hell.” That was my magic, I supposed. Getting
them calm and relaxed so they looked even
remotely sexual.
Josh padded over to the armchair, little round
butt swishing beneath his khaki shorts. I had to
admit I was interested. Didn’t take a degree in
psychology to figure out why. Small. Blond. Pretty.
I needed to find my mystery guy.
“So, I just sit here like this?” He sat on the
armchair all stiff and proper, like some duchess at
high tea.
I snorted. “Is that really how you relax at
home?”
“No.” He smiled in spite of his nerves.
“C’mon. Feet up, eyes closed. Tell me about
your girlfriend.”
“I don’t have one,” he admitted with a small
smile.
“Any girls you like at home?”
And there it was. My smile. I clicked a
picture. “Well, I’m kind of bi, and, well, there was
this one guy named Tyler. He had the biggest grin,
and we kissed a few times in his truck after school.
I had a girlfriend, but I never told her.” Click,
click.
“Josh, look at me.” He opened his eyes,
dreamy and slow, and turned to face me. “Perfect.”
“You know, you have eyes like Tyler. Like a
puppy or something.”
It had happened early, that moment when the
person on the other end of the camera realized I
was harmless and started to flirt. They always did,
though. I wondered if I was a challenge.
“Why don’t you take your shirt off?”
Josh pulled his tank top over his head. I
smiled at him. Some director was going to have an
orgasm over this kid. He pulled his shorts down
lower on his hips and arched his back. “That
good?”
“Perfect.” After a slow start, the kid was a
natural.
By the time I had him sprawled out on my
bed, covered with preppy blue and beige plaid for
that collegiate look, he was giving me the puppy
eyes he’d accused me of having. Every shot looked
more and more intimate, like he was posing for
some guy or girl he was in love with, just for them.
The shots were beautiful. He’d have his first job in
a week.
I told myself that the studio crushes weren’t
real.
When we wrapped up, I went to walk out, to
give him time to dress like I did with everyone
else.
“Hey, wait. Asher. Come back here.”
I turned, and he was there, still lying on my
bed, legs bent at the knee and open.
“Josh, I don’t think—” I started back toward
the door.
Be professional.
I’d never crossed the
line with any of my clients before.
“C’mon, you’ve seen everything I’ve got. Just
a kiss. It’s been forever since anyone kissed me.”
The slight lilt of pain in his voice, that
moment where his big blue eyes looked up from
beneath floppy, bottle-bleached bangs, it wrenched
my heart. Maybe the kid was full of shit, but I
hated how alone he looked. It might have been
worse than the dead eyes.
“Okay. A kiss. I don’t usually do this.”
Josh stood and walked to where I was
standing, lanky and sinuous and so very young.
“Me neither.”
And then he kissed me—my first since my last
boyfriend. And it was nice, I won’t lie, but there
were no fireworks, no volcanic eruptions, just
comfort. Just the feeling of another human’s lips on
mine; one who might be lonely and wishing for a
real connection. Maybe that’s all he wanted too.
He pulled away with hope in his eyes, though. I
felt like an ass.
“Hey, listen, I’m guessing you’re not the type
to take this all the way—” Josh gestured toward
the bed with his head. “—but how would you feel
about dinner or something? It’s been a long time
since I went on a date.”
“Um, exactly how bi are you?” I didn’t know
why I’d asked. It wasn’t like I was going to say
yes.
“Bi enough that I’d really like to kiss you
again. And maybe get to know you a little better.”
I gritted my teeth. Surprisingly, I was a little
tempted. But it was a bad idea. “I actually can’t
tonight. I have plans with a friend.”
“Take my number?” he asked. It was obvious
he was trying to be nonchalant about it.
“I got it. We’ll hang out sometime.”
I felt like shit when Josh left, like I’d used
him somehow. But his pictures were going to be
gorgeous, and hell if I knew how to get out of that
kiss. I wasn’t going to date him. The kid had to be
nineteen, barely street legal. God. I loaded his
proofs onto my computer to start messing with
them. I couldn’t alter the images much, not that he
needed it, but I could crop and add intensity from
the golden glow of the sun through the window. He
really was a beautiful kid. It wasn’t for me, though.
He wasn’t meant to be
my
beautiful kid.
I HADN’T lied when I told Josh I had plans. I met
my friend Christy for dinner at what was probably
my favorite café within a five-mile radius of my
house. They had a ton of salads and pita bread
with different toppings. Christy and I met there
about once a month or so to talk. She was
perpetually, breathlessly late, but I showed up on
time, willing to wait if I got us a good table. I
knew I had a while before she showed up,
typically flustered and windblown, so I pulled out
my phone to check on my old friends. Most of them
were starting to get married, have kids. It was a
little depressing.
I don’t know what made me look up, but I did.
Look up, that is. I’d been fiddling around on my
phone, disinterested, but I felt something. A
tickling little feeling that told me to look up. So I
did. And there he was. This time it really was him.
That phantom perfect guy. I was speechless. I
froze, hand halfway up like a mannequin. I stared
at him. He stared at me. I tried to smile, ’cause
damn, I wanted to. My whole body was jumping up
and down inside. But I was frozen.
My boy, my pretty blond boy, smiled at me
and started to wave, but then his face fell. I didn’t
understand why until Christy’s wave of perfumed
blond hair draped across my shoulder, and she
smacked a big, wet kiss on my cheek.
“Hey, sexy. How’s your day going?”
My boy froze, turned, and booked it for the
door to the café.
“Hold on, Chris. I’ll be back.” I jumped up,
ready to chase him down. Get a name, a phone
number, the date he wanted to waltz off into the
sunset with me… anything. I wove my way through
tables and chairs and people who just wouldn’t
freaking get out of my way. His blond head slid
through the front door of the restaurant. The bells
jangled like some sad song.
No, no, no. Come back!
I managed to get to the front door and burst
through it. I looked to the right, the left, across the
street. Nothing. He was gone.
Shit.
“YOU’RE home early,” I said to Archer as I
walked into the apartment. My mind was still on
my mystery guy, but I was happy to devote a small
corner to being glad my brother seemed to have
turned over a new leaf.
“Oh.” He waved my comment off. “I haven’t
even left yet. I’m waiting for a call from Tommy.”
“Wait, you’re going out? Don’t you have to
work in the morning?”
Archer shrugged. “It’s ’80s night at
Watertown. There will be more ’80s action going
on than just the clothes, if you know what I mean.”
“Archer.” If my brother was getting into coke,
I would kill him. That was the last thing we
needed.
“
Archer
,” he mimicked.
“Remember you need to work in the
morning.” I felt like a goddamned nag. I hated it.
The words kept coming. “Ryan called today and
said you’ve been late a few times. I thought you
were doing better with everything.”
Archer rolled his eyes. He was about to
answer me when his phone rang. He picked it up.
“Hi, hon!” His happy nice guy voice kind of
shocked me. I hadn’t heard it in months. “Okay. I’ll
be out in a minute.” Archer bounded off the couch
and toward the front door.
“Um….”
“I’ll be out until the morning. Don’t worry
about me. I’ll be fine.”
Yeah. Somehow I wasn’t quite buying it.
Chapter Four
Dusty
WHEN a couple of weeks passed with no call from