Out of the Shadow (45 page)

“
But they’re okay now, right?” she asked, eyes still closed. “They’re friends?”

He snorted. “I wouldn’t exactly call them friends, but they’re cool. Don’t worry about it, Ally. And stop with the guilt trip. You can’t help who you love and everyone realizes that.”

“
I know,” she muttered. “I just … hate…this.”

“
It’s getting better, cuz, and this trip will help.”

She wasn’t so sure but she had just enough hope left to hang onto for awhile.

***

On their second night of the cruise, they sat, stuffed full of seafood, at a round table, lazily discussing plans for the next day when the ship would dock at touristy port. The dining room was huge, the ceiling high, and the tables plentiful. The cruise wasn’t as booked as they had initially feared and most of the other passengers were quite a bit older and usually dined earlier.

Cole watched Ally idly play with her water glass as Jamie, who was sitting directly across from her, smirked. Cole lifted a brow in his direction, silently asking what he was up to, when Jamie leaned back in his chair.

“
Hey, cuz,” Jamie asked. Ally looked up at him expectantly. “So, tell us, what did Robby say about you going on a cruise with three guys.”

Ally paled as her eyes bounced over each of them. She shrugged and turned her attention back to her glass. “Nothing. He has no say so in what I do.”

Jamie and RJ grinned at each other, both of them fighting smiles. “So, he wasn’t too thrilled huh?” RJ said.

Ally huffed, rolled her eyes, and turned away from the table. “Like I said, he has no say so in what I do and besides, he doesn’t care.”

“
I know Robby’s a great guy and all that,” RJ said, resting his arms on the table. “But you can’t tell me he’s not the least bit jealous that you’re here with us – especially after…” He nodded his head in Cole’s direction.

Cole snorted and feigned interest in the buffet and the stragglers who had wandered in and were picking at the leftovers.

“
Like I said, he doesn’t care,” she mumbled, lifting her glass to her lips. Cole caught the nervous tremble in her fingers as she set her glass down.

“
What’s up, Al?” he asked softly.

“
Nothing. Not a big deal,” she said, scrunching up her face in nonchalance. She looked at him, watching her carefully, then let her gaze wander to Jamie and finally RJ. She sighed and dropped her hands to her lap. “Fine, if you really want to know, Robby and I decided to just be friends.”

Cole’s heart rejoiced at the news but he kept it from showing on his face. Her shoulders were slumped but her face portrayed no outward pain and he wondered if this decision had come before or after her eagerness to go away with them.

“
When did this happen?” RJ asked.

“
I don’t know,” she said. “A few weeks ago I guess.

“
Why didn’t you tell me?” Jamie demanded.

She shot him a heated glare and he cowered in his chair. “Maybe I was tired of always whining to you guys about how incredibly screwed up my life is, huh? Maybe I didn’t want to tell you that I, once again, managed to hurt someone else.”

“
Al,” Cole said, fumbling for her hand under the table, struggling to conceal his delight. “You didn’t mess up anyone’s life. And we don’t think of it as whining – you know we all try to keep up with what’s going on in each other’s lives.”

She managed a tiny smile as she squeezed his hand. “Thanks.” Her eyes remained locked with his and he could instantly feel the heat rise between them. But he wouldn’t act on it – not now. If she’d just broken things off with Robby, she needed a bit of time. Besides, there was a chance that she didn’t want to resume any sort of romantic relationship with him. Maybe she was happier with them being friends.

“
Enough drama,” RJ declared, pushing away from the table. “Let’s go find the lounge and see what kind of entertainment this bucket of bolts has.”

They spent the next few days occupying their time engaging in different activities the ship offered when they were at sea or strolling through the beautiful towns when they docked. They laughed over RJ’s unusual souvenir choices and surprised Ally when they took her to swim with the dolphins.

They stuck together, never pairing off or leaving one out, and slowly, that closeness they’d always shared came back.

“
Man, I’m not ready to go back to L.A. and work,” RJ grumbled on their last night. They were sprawled in deck chairs, gaping at the vast stars and talking quietly among themselves.

“
I know,” Cole groaned. “It’s been nice to be able to work in Chicago.”

“
I used to love going to the L.A. studio when I was kid,” Jamie added as he reclined his chair and tucked his hands behind his head.

RJ and Cole laughed, leaving Ally to furrow her brows at them. “What’s so funny?”

RJ continued to chortle as Cole cleared his throat and turned his head to Ally, who was sitting in the chair on his immediate left. “James used to have a thing for someone who worked there. What was her name again?”

“
Veronica,” Jamie said with flourish. “She was so deliciously gorgeous.”

“
Veronica?” Ally asked, bolting upright in her chair so she could lean over Cole and gawk at her cousin. “James! She was quite a bit older than you! I mean, she was, like, in her thirties when she worked there!”

“
So?” Cole asked, his voice so close to her ear. Her head snapped toward him and his eyes were mere inches from her. She slowly eased back into her own chair, her heart hammering away in her chest. “It was just a crush, Al.”

“
Yeah, Ally,” RJ said. “Don’t tell us you never had a crush on someone older when you were a kid.”

Ally’s mouth clapped shut as she turned her attention to the stars. Her cheeks heated and she was grateful for the night and little moonlight that hid her embarrassment.

But Jamie would have none of it. He sat straight up and laughed. “Oh, she has! She’s not denying it!”

“
Shut up, James,” she growled, her face growing warmer.

“
Who?” RJ asked gleefully. “Come on, Ally! We’re all friends here – fess up.”

“
Not on your life,” she said, tight-lipped.

“
It’s got to be good,” Cole said as he reached for her hand. “Tell us, princess.

“
Do not call me that,” she said, squirming in discomfort.

“
We promise we won’t laugh,” Jamie said with a chuckle in his voice. “Much.”

“
No way in hell,” she said firmly.

Cole squeezed her head. “Then we’ll guess. Let’s see…”

“
Oh, I know,” RJ announced, nearly bouncing in his chair. “Rhys Redden. That would explain a lot!”

“
No,” she said tersely. “And don’t start on the whole Robby thing, either.”

“
Wouldn’t dream of it,” Jamie said, thoroughly enjoying himself. “Hm, maybe that guy, Orlando, or whatever his name was – the roadie guy. The one all the chicks liked.”

She huffed and ripped her hand from Cole. “His name was Owen and no, that’s not it either.”

“
Just tell us,” Cole said. “Or else they’ll keep this up all night.”

“
We’ll keep it up until we figure it out,” RJ threatened.

She believed him. She knew they’d do it until they caught her at a weak moment and wheedled it out of her. It was best to get it over with and let them know on her own terms.

“
Fine,” she grumbled. “But don’t laugh.”

“
Who?” RJ said, on the very edge of his seat.

She mumbled a name which none of them heard.

“
What was that?” Cole asked cheerfully.

She bit her lip and draped an arm over her face. “Nate, okay? I had a crush on Nate when I was like ten.”

There was a brief pause before they all burst with laughter. She just shook her head, her cheeks positively flaming, and waited for them to get it out of there system.

“
Now that explains a lot!” Jamie declared.

“
All right, laugh it up,” she said in disgust. “Are you finished?”

“
My
dad
, Nate?” Cole asked in disbelief. She glowered at him and he accepted that as confirmation. He grinned at her, warming her heart, and took her hand again. “And to think, princess, that I always thought you spent so much time at my house because of me.”

She wrenched her hand free and folded her arms over her chest, which only made them laugh harder. She set her lips in a straight line and counted the stars until they finally had themselves under control.

They continued to rib her, gently, until Jamie yawned and declared that it was time for him to get to bed. RJ followed but Cole stayed in his chair. He waited until the others were out of earshot before scooting to the edge of his chair and turning toward her.

“
How are you doing, Al?” he asked. “I mean, really?”

She mimicked his action and moved toward the end of her own chair. “I’m okay.”

He nodded and ducked his head. Her heart went out to him and she longed to draw him in an embrace and comfort him, but she stayed put.

“
Um,” he said, speaking more to the deck than to her. “I’m sorry about you and Robby, but I’m sort of glad, too.”

He lifted his head and she cupped his cheek. “I don’t know what to say.”

He curled his fingers around her hand and tugged her off her chair and onto his. “You don’t have to say anything, Al. I don’t expect you to come running back to me.”

“
I’m just so confused about everything right now, Cole,” she said, desperation in her voice. “I don’t know what to do.”

He wrapped his arms around her and she rested her head on his chest. He kissed the top of her head and held her tighter. “You do nothing right now. Don’t stress about it.”

“
I’m sorry, Cole,” she said. “So sorry.”

“
Stop apologizing, okay?” he said as he placed a knuckle under her chin and lifted her face. He brushed his lips lightly over hers then edged back to wink. “I’m over it.”

She giggled and threw her arms around his neck, hugging him. He returned it then helped her to her feet. “Thanks, Cole.”

“
No problem, princess,” he said. “Come on, I’ll walk you to your cabin.”

“
Don’t call me that,” she said, but the hardness was absent from her voice.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Ally spent her first night back settling in and catching up with Shannon. Shannon had spent her spring break with her father and her brother visiting family in Wisconsin. She’d fawned over Ally’s tan and expressed her jealousy that the most glamorous thing she’d done on vacation was visit a cheese factory.

She quickly got back into the swing of things as her first year of college wound down. She grew excited as the days grew warmer because Jamie had talked increasingly of them renting a house off campus and finding summer jobs. As much as she enjoyed her somewhat freedom of college life, she was even more eager for freedom from classes.