Painting Sky (5 page)

The next few days went by without much happening.

Cody officially started school, with study dates and group projects. I had a paper to write and some studying to do, but I wasn’t doing any better in Representational Drawing. On the contrary, the professor was starting to think I had no business being in her class. Every time she went by my easel and made that irritating clicking with her tongue, I had the stupid urge to cry. I missed my friends—people I could talk to. Text messages weren’t as comforting as speaking in person when they tried to help me cope with this.

Keith’s attitude didn’t help. After our little talk in the kitchen, when he’d actually sounded like a human being, he had gone back to ignoring me when he was upset or bickering with me when he was bored. My brother never defended me from him. In fact, he actually incited most of the verbal aggression between us. Cody had given up defending me long ago and would just shrug and place his arm around me, possessively, which only gave Keith ammunition. Sometimes, he even tried to turn Cody and Ryan against each other, which bothered me more than when the conversation was focused only on me.

After a long and agonizing day, during which my professor had displayed my drawing as an example of what not to do, and I received a C on my first essay, which was worth 20% of the grade in Composition and Rhetoric, I came home to a house full of strangers playing on one of the consoles in the living room.

I was so tired of coming home to surprises like those. Fridays were partying days; Saturdays were calmer, but had parties, as well. One time, I had gone into my room to find a couple going at it in my bed—it had disgusted the hell out of me. I’d screamed at them to leave and I’ve been locking the door ever since.

With these guys, I never could know. One day, they’d have to study or go somewhere to study, and the next, they’d drink beer like they were on vacation with all the free time in the world.

I closed the front door with a little more violence than was needed, which made the guys raise their heads to look at me.

One of them had piercings all over his face. He appraised me from head to toe, lingering at my shorts and cleavage, which left me uncomfortable. His friends were eyeing me, too, but not as intensely. I was about to ask for the guys who actually lived in this house, when Keith came from the kitchen, holding a tray full of beer bottles—and a bag of chips I had bought with my own money. I would never be cheap enough to point that out, though.

“Do you know when Cody will be home?”

“Oh, this is the girlfriend, would never have guessed,” the overly-pierced one sneered. He raised his eyebrows and looked over my body once again, as if he couldn’t believe someone like Cody could be with someone like me. I hated when people made me feel like that, and I hugged my body to somehow shield myself from them.

“Yeah,” Keith answered, gulping his beer and eyeing me, amused. I should’ve known he wouldn’t defend me from his friends.

“You’re an asshole!” That had come out of nowhere and surprised the hell out of me. I had been thinking that for days, but today it just slipped. Keith was surprised, as well: his eyebrows shot up. It was time for me to flee before I made an even bigger fool of myself. So, I did something I was good at: I ran upstairs, leaving his friends chuckling behind me.

I knew my cheeks were red with embarrassment. I shouldn’t have given Keith this power; I really needed to start standing up for myself. How difficult could it be?

I changed clothes and lay on my bed, looking at the perfect, white ceiling. I sucked at this college thing. I hadn’t made a single friend, hadn’t enjoyed a single party, and hadn’t had a single drop of alcohol. Wasn’t that the spirit of college? I was a good girl, but I didn’t even get the good grades that would make an acceptable package.

Groaning against my pillow, my thoughts trailed to my relationship with Cody. We weren’t as close as we had been in high school, but at least now I could see him every day and not every other month, like last year.

My birthday was a week away and I was seriously considering losing my virginity on it. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I would be giving Cody a present, instead, and it felt very wrong. I couldn’t do it just for him. I was messed up.

I groaned against the pillow once again and almost missed the light knock on my door. I wasn’t interested in anyone, but Cody—or, perhaps, my brother—and neither of them would have waited as long to open the door. When I thought the person had given up, another knock came—a little louder, this time.

“Yeah?” I was tired and wanted to get it over with.

Keith entered and closed the door behind him. I guess his friends were still downstairs and he didn’t want them to hear what he had to say.

“I’m sorry.” His voice came as a whisper and I almost thought it had been my imagination. Keith Hale apologizing? I snorted then, incapable of holding it in, anymore.

He frowned and sat at the end of my bed without an invitation, which made me cross my arms protectively. “I’m not joking. I am sorry. I was a jerk just then, letting Vince make fun of you.” He nodded at the door and my eyebrows shot up. Was he kidding me?

“‘Just then?’” I spoke my mind, not minding the hurtful words that would come at any second.

“I don’t regret the other teasing when we’re alone, or with the guys, but I understand that I was letting a stranger disrespect you in front of me. Vince won’t bother you again.” He stood up and didn’t seem to be troubled about whether I forgave him. I guess the apology was to make him feel better.

Cody came home just before dinner. He had texted me, though, to let me know, so I couldn’t actually feel bad. He had to put his classes before me, of course, but it hurt, anyway.

He wrapped his arms around me pulling me against his warm body. I felt safe, then—finally, after the crappy day I’d had.

“I missed you,” I mumbled against his shirt. He chuckled against my cheek.

“We saw each other this morning, remember? I remember very well. I was just thinking about it when I was supposed to be listening about politics.” I blushed. We hadn’t done anything memorable—just made out in the car before leaving the driveway. I was being irrational with this sex thing. We were living together: I might as well get the best of it, right?

Most of my friends were no longer virgins, which was just one more thing that wasn’t right with me. I was dating the hottest boy from school and delaying something that was supposed to be good. I just felt that something was missing. Not knowing what it was bothered me more than it should have.

“My birthday is coming up,” I said, before losing the courage. “We could do something different.” I looked up to Cody’s face and saw surprise there. Had he lost all hope of having a normal relationship with me? Was he tired of waiting?

“What do you have in mind?” His voice dropped from the lighter teasing tone and got rougher. I had to get it out before my courage went through the door.

“I was thinking… uhm.” I played with a strand of hair, trying to sound sexy and not freaked out. “We could go have dinner—or stay. I don’t know.” The confidence was turning the doorknob, now, but he understood my meaning. We had talked about this before, but now it wasn’t the “I’m not ready” and the “I’ll wait as long as you need;” it was the real thing.

“Are you sure?” He knew me well enough to discern exactly what I was talking about. I nodded and he looked relieved, as if he had already given up.

“Sure about what?” Ryan came barging into the kitchen, trying to get to the food before anyone else, as always. I blushed deeply and Cody stood between me and Ryan, pretending that we were just making out. He didn’t like to see us like this, but it was better than having my older brother know about our plans.

“She’s sure that she loves me. What else?” Cody said. I smiled at my brother’s disgusted face, but the smile went away when I noticed Keith waiting by the door.

Since his friends had gone home, he had locked himself in that damned attic, doing God-knows-what. His face was unreadable, but I knew he was still thinking about the way he’d treated me earlier. Maybe he was afraid I would tell on him. I smirked then, maybe for the first time. His posture went more rigid.

“I met Keith’s friends today. They are very… interesting.” I kept the playful tone, but Cody looked down at me, scowling. Maybe I shouldn’t have gotten between them. Their relationship was already not good.

“Did they say anything to you?” Cody’s eyes darted from me to his brother.

Dislike was something I was used to, but this look was bordering on hate. I never wanted Cody and Keith to hate each other. “No, they just commented on the fact that I was your girlfriend.” It was the truth.

“That’s all? I have a hard time believing that.” He scanned his brother’s face for some kind of confirmation, but, if he saw what I saw, he wouldn’t get anything.

I swear Keith was made of plastic. He set his face on the expression he chose, even when he was thinking the opposite. Even when he teased me, I could feel something else there—some unspoken advise. It was as if he didn’t want me to like him. Maybe that was his plan to send me away, screaming “bloody murder.”

I wouldn’t give him that satisfaction, though. Not even if he was actually murdering me—no, I’d suffer in silence. The thought made me snicker, which made both Hale boys frown at me. This made me laugh even harder.

“Let’s eat. I’ve waited long enough for both of you.” I had made a point of looking at only Ryan and Cody and forgetting the fourth person in the room.

I made Ryan carry our dinner to the table while Cody carried the plates. I once again ignored Keith, who chuckled when it was just the two of us in the kitchen. I had my head inside the fridge, deciding on what I wanted to drink, when that smooth laugh behind me made me turn to glare at him.

“What?”

“You’re ignoring me, which just prevented me from carrying anything. I don’t know if you’re punishing me or not. You’re confusing.” The last sentence was said right into my ear as he pushed by me to get a beer. I was so stunned by the shiver running through my body that I forgot to answer.

I was boiling with rage all through dinner, which interfered with my meal.

“Are you okay, sis?” Ryan looked at me, expecting an answer I didn’t have. “You’re flustered and Cody isn’t even touching you.” His face scrunched up at the thought of his friend touching his little sister.

“I’m… just not hungry.”

“You were just complaining about waiting.” Keith had to make a point—he just had to. I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply. He knew I was worked up because he was a jerk.

“Just go find a hole to hide in.” I was so surprised by my outburst that I’d almost put my hand over my mouth. The small regret I felt, however, dissipated the moment Keith’s laugh hit my ears. Of course he would find this amusing.

Having endured enough, I got up, leaving my plate exactly where it was, and went to my room. Before I could close the door, the argument downstairs had already started. I didn’t care if Cody scolded his brother, anymore: he was just unbelievable. I set my head on the pillow, thinking about how Keith, at least, had served a purpose: I had forgotten about my shitty day, and of the anticipation of my upcoming birthday.

T
he day I feared snuck upon me without notice. I remember, when I was a kid, anticipating the day and counting down, screeching with happiness when it came along.

Today, I had the opposite feeling: I had a huge knot in my stomach and the wrinkles on my forehead wouldn’t go away. I headed downstairs in a somber mood.

When I pulled the door open, the last person I wanted to see was sitting on a stool, sipping his morning coffee. He didn’t acknowledge me.

I poured some coffee in a random mug, since Keith was using my favorite one, and tried to reach the last package of cookies on the top shelf. I really didn’t want to use the stool in front of Keith.

What was the least humiliating decision? Trying to reach it by jumping on the counter or getting the stupid stool? I almost decided on just eating something at school when a throat being cleared sounded just behind me. I knew that, if I turned around, he would be invading my personal space. I had no intention of letting him ruin my birthday, so I stayed put with my arms crossed over my chest.