Authors: H. G. Adler
Once the children are all gathered together in the living room, the mother says that she hopes they will all get along and have a fine time today, because Josef turned eight the day before yesterday, and everyone hopes that he’ll be a fine young man. The children listen quietly as the mother speaks, though they don’t pay attention much, many looking around and making funny faces. Then Aunt Gusti tells everyone to pay attention, because she is going to play something on the piano by Robert Schumann, who was a great composer who wrote lots of beautiful music, and because he loved children so he had written music for them, even though he wrote other music that was not especially for children, because it was too difficult and was instead just about children, though that which he had written for children is delightful, and from which the aunt would like to play, as she proceeds to present three pieces, one of which is called “The Merry Peasant.” A little girl about the same age as Kitti, but much dumber, immediately begins to cry and says that she wants to go home, Aunt Betti going to her and telling her that she has to be quiet so that others can hear the music, saying that she must behave, because afterward there will be many good things to eat and lots of surprises, after which she is quiet and only sniffles. Then Aunt Gusti is soon done at the piano, and as she finishes, all of the children cheer and clap, pleasing the aunt deeply, after which she says that she was happy to play, especially as it brought pleasure to others. And then the mother begins to sing, Aunt Gusti accompanying her as they do a number of lovely songs, such as “The Mill Wheel Turns” and “Do You Know How Many Stars There Are?” Josef loves these songs, and the children are pleased as well, all of them singing with soft, sweet voices, though the grown-ups like to sing, too, there being once a month a pleasant musical evening put on by the soldiers at the hospital, Josef having been allowed to go the last time, when a man in a tuxedo had played a piano and his mother had sung and everyone applauded loudly, while those who could not clap
because they were missing a hand had loudly called out “Bravo! Bravo!” and the mother had to sing another song and yet another, as she grew more and more pleased and smiled, until finally she said so sweetly that she could do no more, for there was lots more to come on the program, though she hoped she would have the chance to sing again if it pleased others for her to do so.
The mother had sung only three songs for the children, ending with “Sweetheart Mine,” after which it was time, Aunt Betti anxious to move things along, Anna having already quietly opened the door four times to place two pitchers on the table, which today is set and doesn’t have any dish towels on it, but rather a real tablecloth, the pitchers sitting there full of cocoa, as well as a proper cake made of flour, which no one has anymore, as well as cookies and gingerbread stars, all of the children surprised as Aunt Betti exclaims, “So, children, you’ve listened so sweetly. But you don’t have to keep listening forever. Now it’s time to talk and eat!” Everyone helps out and leads the children to the long table, and for the smallest who are too little there are chairs with high pillows so that the little tots sit no lower than the bigger kids and they can all reach across the table with their hands. As they all sit there in front of their plates and stare at the cups full of cocoa, and as the mother and Aunt Gusti place cake on the plates and hand out sweets, the children look pleased and happy just to see the way the steam rises from the cups, the mother laughing with delight and saying, “All right, help yourselves and enjoy!” Then they all eat and drink, and soon there are stains on the white tablecloth, but no one scolds them, the grown-ups not even sitting down, as today they are the servants and the children are the masters, the adults serving them, though the father looks exhausted and sits in a corner, the mother bringing him a cup of cocoa that he holds in his hand, now and then taking a sip, though he eats nothing, nor do the other grown-ups, since they are too busy and Aunt Betti’s face is bloodred.
Finally the children have eaten everything, Anna starts clearing the table, the others helping, and then the table is shoved aside so that there is more space in the living room, all of the chairs placed in a row, as they begin to play games, though someone announces that two children have to go out, which they do, after which the musical chairs continues, but then one chair is knocked over so hard that it breaks, which will give Wenzel something to
fix, as Aunt Betti says, “Children, that’s too wild! This won’t do! We need to play some games that are a little less lively!” And then Bubi says that he and Kitti have a big surprise, which he had said nothing about because Tata had said that he shouldn’t, but that now Kitti would like to dance and Bubi would accompany her on the harmonica, to which the mother says, “How wonderful of you both to play something for our party! Go ahead and begin!” And so Bubi begins to blow on his harmonica as loud as he can, though he’s not that loud, since a harmonica is not as loud as an accordion, as Kitti begins to dance around so strangely, lowering her skirt and raising first one leg and then the other like a chicken in the yard, and then she lowers the skirt again and spreads her hands wide, the mother and the aunts saying how charming she is, some of the other children pleased as well, the father laughing, though some of the children don’t pay attention and just sit there biting their fingernails. Josef doesn’t like the dance and such dumb blowing on the harmonica, for he never thought of Bubi as being so childish, especially since he wanted to be a general, and Ludwig comes over to Josef and says, “This dancing is stupid. Now you see what an idiot Bubi is.” Josef half believes so himself, but he won’t admit it to Ludwig, who has upset him by saying that, so Josef doesn’t say a word. But finally the dance is over, almost everyone delighted and amazed by Kitti as they praise her, saying oh, how graceful, what a surprise, and Aunt Betti kisses Kitti on the forehead, though Bubi says that Tata had known that it would be precious, which is why she had sewn this dress special from an old nightgown with lace in order that one be able to dance well within it, to which Kitti adds, “I danced real nice! I danced real nice! I danced real nice!” Then the mother says, “If I understand correctly, my dear, you danced very well!”
Then the doorbell rings again and Anna comes in saying that Frau Wetzler’s nanny is there and Paul must head home already, as Aunt Betti says, “Yes indeed, it’s getting late, but the nanny should wait a minute. We’re almost through here.” And then the aunt says that it’s time for the biggest surprise of all, one that will certainly please everybody, with something the children will never forget. Then Josef recites the poem that Aunt Betti has written, as she also opens the door to the next room, right at the conclusion of the final line, “Reel in the best thing that you can!,” while Josef makes an inviting gesture with his hand, pointing to the door, just as he and Aunt
Betti had rehearsed in order that it look really elegant, it having taken a long time to get right. Then everyone goes into the next room, each child getting a turn with the pole as he is blindfolded and has to fish for a packet, while outside the bell rings more and more often, the foyer grows full, as well as the entire apartment, more and more people arriving, all of the children needing to head home, such that they give up on the blindfold in order to wrap up the magic pond more quickly, though it still takes too long, and the father says, “Whoever doesn’t have a present yet should just grab one, though please, one at a time!” Then all the children do indeed have a present, though there are some left over, since there had been so many, and more children had been invited than had come. Now the last guests finally leave, but the foyer is still full of people looking for the children’s coats, until everything is sorted out and the last step down the stairs is heard.
And once all the guests have left, how tired everyone is, the entire apartment a shambles, the place hardly recognizable, several things having been broken, not just the chair that Wenzel will have to fix but also two glasses that Wenzel can do nothing with. Then the aunts also say goodbye, Aunt Gusti telling the mother, “Mella, you need to finally get that piano tuned.” Then there is only the mother and the father, Anna off in the kitchen, washing lots of silverware, though the mother soon joins her, saying that she’ll help, as she thanks Anna for being such a dear, for there couldn’t have been any party without her. Anna says that she was happy to do it, she also had fun, but back when things were better, when Anna lived with Angela, one could hire an extra maid to help out, something that will happen only when there is finally peace once again, though Anna cannot believe that life will ever be as good as it was before the war. The father is simply dead tired and says, “If the only trouble is that one can’t have a children’s birthday party, then as far as I’m concerned the war can go on forever. Unfortunately, that’s not the case.” Josef is also very tired, but he looks to see what presents are left in the magic pond, since now they are his, then he sits down in the rocking chair, slowly rocking back and forth for a while, it feeling like when he rides along in a streetcar or on a train, and he rides along until his eyes close and he falls asleep.
H
ERR
N
EUMANN IN
U
MLOWITZ IS NOT TOO TALL, SOMEWHAT FAT, AND
has seven children whose names are Rudolf, Adolf, Arthur, Erwin, Fritz, Otto, and Herma, though now he also has a foster son named Josef. Rudolf is already an engineer, but he doesn’t have a job and spends most of his time at home. Adolf is younger, yet already married, having married a maidservant, which angered Herr Neumann, because the girl had no money and was common, which is why Adolf did not stay in Umlowitz but instead left with his wife and opened his own business in Kaplitz, which apparently is doing well, for he handles flour and other farm products, traveling with his wagon throughout the district and knowing how to bargain with the farmers, who are happy to sell to him because he pays so quickly, while sometimes he even ends up competing with his father, though that doesn’t bother Herr Neumann all that much. Herma, meanwhile, is very sweet and very busy, for she runs the entire household, Frau Neumann having died when Otto was just a baby, after which Herma had taken over all duties, including the cooking and the washing, as well as keeping an eye on what’s
going on with the business, making sure all the male and female servants were kept in line, everyone fond of her, the people of Umlowitz saying what a good person Herma is, while Josef thinks of her as a second mother, though she’s quite young. Then there’s Arthur, who has just completed business school and is living again at home in order to help Herr Neumann. Meanwhile Erwin visits only during school breaks from his high school, and Fritz also takes courses at the vocational school in Budweis, staying there the whole week when classes are on, and returning home on Saturdays only to head out again early Monday morning.
The smallest is Otto, who is much smaller than Josef, for even though he’s three years older he’s a sickly child who has to be dressed each morning and undressed each evening because he can’t do it himself, Herma most often doing it for him, and when she doesn’t have enough time Poldi does it, or one of the brothers. Everyone says of Otto that he’s a little slow, a sweet child nonetheless, but because he wets the bed each night one has to place a diaper beneath his bedsheet, as if he were a baby, though he can’t help it, and it’s just something unfortunate you have to put up with. He also has a very high voice, like a little girl, and he talks through his nose, so you have to listen carefully in order to understand what he’s saying, though he can say a lot and he talks a lot, and he understands what you say to him, in addition to being able to sing many songs without ever making a mistake, even if his voice isn’t too lovely, because he sings through his nose as well. He has gone to school for many years, but he’s still in the first grade, as he doesn’t advance with the other children and can only say “one and one is two,” while in the reader he knows little more than the difference between a printed “i” and a written “i,” for though he can point to a printed “i” and a written “i” with his finger, among the other letters he knows only the “n” and sometimes the “e” and “m” as well, but he doesn’t know any of the other letters, even if you continually show him, Herma or Fritz having spent half an hour with him each day in an effort to teach him something. But Otto can only write the “i,” and when he has written one he’s happy and shows it to everyone, and everyone says how wonderful it is that he has written such a beautiful “i.” But Rudolf often says that it would be best for Otto to be placed in an institution, to which Herma says nothing or simply that he is Mother’s youngest son, while Herr Neumann says that not even his worst
enemy could accuse him of being a bad father who would kick his own flesh and blood out of the house just because he’s a helpless creature forced to go through the world lost and alone, though he hopes that one day Otto will be better. But if that does not happen, then Herr Neumann believes there will always be enough left over for him, and that the other six children will be kind enough to take in Otto, to which all of them say they certainly will, even if he remains the child that he is now.