Paradise (8 page)

Another swig. ‘And I really wasn’t trying to get back with him; I just wanted to be friends. It would be nice to have a friend like Cal.’ It was like watching an emotional car crash. Even Jez, who was never usually lost for words, was speechless.

‘Don’t you want to go back to your friend?’ Angel asked, desperate to get rid of Simone.

‘Oh, he probably won’t even notice. He’s too busy checking his CrackBerry or letching after the twenty-something waitress. And, if you must know, I can’t bear being with him another minute . . . he makes my flesh crawl.’

To Angel’s horror, tears began snaking their way down Simone’s cheeks, leaving streaks of black mascara. While Angel and Jez sat there frozen, Rufus put his arm round her and said gently, ‘D’you want me to call you a taxi?’

Simone shook her head and tried to brush away the tears. ‘I can’t leave yet, I have to spend the night with him . . . it’s part of the package.’

Oh my God! Was Simone a hooker now?

She looked at Jez. ‘I just wondered if you had anything on you? I’d pay you back next time. I need a little pick me up, something to get me through . . . I can’t get hold of my usual source.’

A coke-snorting hooker?

‘Sweetie, I don’t do drugs, I’ve always had a strictly just-say-no policy . . . well, except to poppers, but I don’t think you need those right now. I think you should go home and have a nice cup of tea then go straight to bed. We’ll get you a taxi, and explain to your gentleman friend that you’re not feeling too good.’

‘Would you really do that?’ Simone gazed at him, her eyes still brimming with tears.

‘No problem,’ Jez replied, and stood up, holding out
his arm for her to take. She struggled to get up and then looked once more at Angel. ‘You’re mad to think you’ll ever find another man like Cal. And it won’t be long before he finds someone else. I mean, come on, this is Cal we’re talking about . . . he could have
anyone
. I saw him the other month with about three model types hanging round him.’

Bloody hell! Now Angel could feel tears pricking her own eyes. She tried to tell herself that they were tears of sympathy at seeing the wreck Simone had made of her life as she watched her totter towards the door, clinging on to Jez and Rufus for grim death, but knew that her words about Cal had struck home.

Angel expected that Jez would return and make some bitchy quip about Simone being on the WAG scrap heap, but he was unusually subdued when he sat back down. ‘I never really liked her, but it was just awful seeing her in that state. She really cried when we got her in the taxi . . . said that men were never nice to her like we had been,’ he said quietly. ‘Makes you realise what’s important, doesn’t it?’ He reached across the table and took Rufus’ hand. ‘If I hadn’t met Rufus when I did, I could see myself going down that route.’

‘What! Being an escort and taking drugs?’ Angel asked, trying to inject a bit of humour into the situation. But Jez was having none of it. He shook his head. ‘Drink more likely, and a succession of one night stands . . . anything to fill the emptiness. It was Rufus who saw the real me, saw beyond the camp act that I put on.’

He smiled at Jez, then looked at Angel. ‘So are you okay about what Simone said to you? I don’t think she meant it to upset you.’

‘It made a change from her usual slating of me,’ Angel tried to say lightly because Simone’s words had
really shaken her. Yet again, she couldn’t seem to escape from thoughts of Cal.

She ended up calling him when she got back to her hotel suite, on the pretext of finding out if Honey was okay, but really to hear his voice. ‘Did you have a good time with Jez and Rufus?’ Cal asked. He sounded sleepy, as if he was lying in bed. Angel had a sudden unexpected longing to be lying next to him.

‘It was eventful,’ she replied, going on to tell him about seeing Simone.

‘Christ, she sounds a mess!’ Cal exclaimed. ‘I had no idea. Perhaps I’ll send her a text, see if she wants to meet up sometime.’

Angel knew Cal well enough to realise that he didn’t have feelings for Simone any more. After they had split up she had turned into something of a bunny-boiling stalker, and he very nearly had to take out an injunction against her. Angel should have been able to stay dispassionate at the prospect of them meeting up, but rational thought seemed to have gone out of the window and she was gripped by the most intense feeling of jealousy at the thought of Cal seeing Simone. Who was to say that his old girlfriend wouldn’t charm him again? She’d managed it before in the past. She might have been a wreck tonight but it probably wouldn’t take much to get her looking good again . . . The jealous thoughts swirled round Angel’s head like a sickening fair-ground ride even as she wondered why the hell she was getting so wound up.

The following day she tried to ignore the emotional battle being waged inside her and focus on business and work as she went to see her agent, Carrie Rose, in her office in the heart of Soho. She’d been with Carrie since she’d started out as a glamour model and on the whole
they got on well, even if at times Carrie’s love of making money over everything else did grate. But Angel appreciated her agent’s business acumen.

Carrie was working out on the Power Plate she’d recently had installed in her office. Pam, the PA, told Angel before she went in to see her that Carrie was obsessed with using it and literally hopped on it after every single snack or drink she consumed. She was paranoid about keeping slim.

‘I’ll be with you in a minute,’ she called as Angel walked in.

She sat down on the mint-green leather sofa and tried not to look at Carrie’s tiny bum vibrating away on the Power Plate. Despite being in her mid-fifties Carrie dressed like someone in their twenties, today in black skinny jeans and a tight white tee-shirt with the word
Juicy
printed across her perky silicone boobs. She had recently had her long blonde hair cut into a bob and looked better for it.

She finally stepped off the Plate, slipped on her heels and walked over to Angel to give her the obligatory two air kisses.

‘You look gorgeous, darling. LA must be agreeing with you . . . and that divine baseball player. You sure know how to pick the good ones, don’t you? First Cal, then Baseball Boy . . . and the fact that he’s such a star in the US is doing your profile no end of good. You must talk to Susie, I want her to work on your profile with you.’ She click clacked over to the door and called out, ‘Susie, babe, come see Angel.’

She turned back to Angel who looked at her inquiringly, surprised that Carrie wanted to involve Susie, who was her junior agent.

‘I’m taking more of a back seat in the agency,’ Carrie explained, ‘since I married Dave. I’ve discovered that there’s more to life than working all the time.’ She
looked adoringly at the large photograph of a boyishly good-looking man on her desk.

Dave was the twenty-five-year-old builder Carrie had met six months before when he came to convert her loft. It had been love at first sight apparently, and by all accounts he was a lovely man who worshipped Carrie. She, in turn, could not stop telling everyone how wonderful he was – on Facebook, on Twitter, in texts. Angel was only surprised Carrie hadn’t put Dave’s name on her tee-shirt!

‘I know everyone thinks it won’t last and that he’s the boy toy to my Cougar, but I know he’s the man I’ve been waiting for all my life. You just know don’t you?’ Carrie said seriously. Her words reminded Angel of her feelings for Cal and Ethan. Damn! She really didn’t need an emotional heart to heart right now.

Fortunately, at that moment Susie walked in and more air kisses followed, with comments from Susie about how great it was that Angel was with Ethan. Angel felt like saying that it hadn’t been a career move, she was in love with the guy! Susie, who was in her mid-thirties, and pretty with long auburn hair and big brown eyes then turned serious. ‘I’ve been looking at the press stories about you and Ethan and I really think you need to go to more premieres. And you absolutely have got to go to the Oscar parties in March. Profile, profile, profile Angel! There are thousands of beautiful women in LA!’

Angel sighed, ‘I don’t want to go out every single night, I want to be there for Honey.’

Susie pursed her caramel glossed lips together, clearly disapproving, but managed to say, ‘Okay but a few events wouldn’t go amiss. I’ve had Benny Sullivan on the phone asking if we can liaise and get some publicity for you guys. I’m not averse to the idea of working with him, he’s got amazing contacts.’

Angel grimaced. ‘He’s so arrogant and full of himself. He even suggested I got my boobs redone.’ She looked across at Carrie, who just shrugged and said, ‘Don’t if you don’t want to, they still look good to me!’ She really had mellowed! Angel thought.

But Susie raised her eyebrows, ‘Well you have had a child, darling, maybe it is time for a freshen up.’ She said it as if it was equivalent of a trip to the hairdressers for a cut and blow dry. ‘And Benny could be useful to us. We could be talking big money here.’

Susie sounded like Carrie back in the day. Angel glanced at Carrie again, expecting her to be nodding her approval, but she was busy looking at her emails. Angel returned her gaze to Susie. ‘He’s already hinted that I should have an American agent.’

Carrie’s ears pricked up at this. ‘Don’t be silly, darling. Susie will go out to LA and look after you, won’t you, Susie? I might be married now, Angel, but it doesn’t mean I’ve lost interest in your career. I’m as committed as I ever was.’

Susie looked very eager at this. ‘Absolutely. I think one of us needs to be there, and I really want to pick up some clients out there. In the meantime keep me posted on anything Benny comes up with.’ Susie was certainly coming across as a force to be reckoned with.

They finished the meeting by going through all Angel’s work commitments – she had several shoots coming up for her own lingerie range and for various magazines, plus in the spring she would be returning to the UK to launch her second fragrance. She also had plans to launch her own range of children’s clothes. Angel had always had a good head for business.

Usually Angel would have felt energised by the prospect of new work projects but she still couldn’t
shake off the memory of Simone’s comments about Cal. Angel had once believed that she and Cal would be together forever; that he was the only man for her. She worked herself up into such a state, remembering this, that she almost had butterflies about seeing him when she went to pick up Honey from his Brighton apartment. But Cal was offhand with her when he opened the door. There was no smile, just a matter-of-fact, ‘Hi, Honey’s in the living room. Come in.’ Angel’s excitement faded; she couldn’t bear it when he was like this.

Honey was sitting on a rug in the living room, playing happily with her toy cat. Angel rushed over to give her a hug and kiss.

‘I think I’ve packed up all her things,’ Cal said as he handed over Honey’s rucksack, giving off the vibe of wanting to get rid of Angel as soon as possible. He was dressed in a sharply cut black Prada suit and looked as if he was about to go out.

‘Thanks,’ Angel replied. ‘No worries if not, Honey’s got plenty of other things. In fact, I think she might have more clothes than me!’

She waited for Cal to make a joking comment back – he’d always teased her about how much stuff she had when they were together – but he simply said, ‘Please call me when you get back to LA. I’d like to know that you’ve landed safely.’

‘So are you going out somewhere tonight?’ Angel asked, wanting to know if he had a date.

‘Yep, I’m meeting some friends in London. I never like to be on my own when Honey goes. I’m sure you understand that.’

Angel wondered if the friends were female, thinking back to Simone’s words. Cal avoided eye contact and remained standing. Angel gathered up Honey and her rucksack and said goodbye. There was no sign that he
was thinking about her. She felt stupid giving Cal so much headspace when it was obvious he was getting on perfectly fine without her, and found herself questioning why she was even wasting her time thinking about him.

‘
SO DID YOU
miss this, Angel?’ Ethan asked as they lay in bed together after making love. She had been back in LA a week and Ethan had been very attentive, wanting to make love twice a day. Frankly it was getting knackering! But Angel guessed it was all down to his insecurity about her seeing Cal again; his wanting to prove that she belonged to him and not her ex-husband.

‘Of course,’ she said lightly, stroking his shoulder, when the truth was she had been so caught up with wondering about Cal that she hadn’t thought about Ethan much while she was away. And Ethan’s insecurity had only intensified when pictures of Cal, Honey and Angel, being reunited at the airport, made it into the celeb mags.

‘Your ex is very good at playing happy families, isn’t he?’ Ethan had commented, looking totally pissed off.

‘He loves Honey, I can’t deny that.’

‘Yeah, let’s hope she isn’t too disillusioned when she finds out what her daddy’s really like.’

Angel hadn’t wanted a full-scale row and so had let the comment go, but she knew Ethan was still brooding about it. She herself was finding it hard to block out her feelings for Cal, but had returned to LA determined to
try . . . and especially to stop thinking about that kiss. However intoxicating it had felt, Cal belonged to her past; Ethan was her here and now.

‘There’s nothing I need to know about, is there?’ Ethan asked unexpectedly, taking her right back to the night of the kiss. Maybe she should confess. That way it would be out in the open and she could deal with it better. Then she considered how hurt he would be.

‘No, there’s nothing you need to know about,’ she told him.

Ethan sighed, ‘It’s just that sometimes I feel as if you’re holding something back.’

She shook her head. ‘No, there’s nothing, I swear.’ Even as she came out with the lie she felt awful. She held him tighter, as if Ethan’s physical presence could somehow shield her from thinking about Cal.

But Ethan was moving away and getting out of bed, putting on his white bathrobe. ‘Benny’s due here soon, he wants to talk to us about a TV project.’