Chapter Twenty-three
August was a month that was hot no matter what. It was in the middle of the year between a windy spring and a cool fall. You could not escape its heat. But as I looked around at those who were closest to me, the joy I felt even in the midst of the heat was hard to contain.
“Baby girl, how does it feel to turn thirty?” Dad asked.
“Like it felt yesterday, when I was twenty-nine,” I replied and laughed.
“Give it a few days. Your entire outlook on life will change,” Mom chimed in.
“She is right. Girl, when I turned thirty, men started flocking to me left and right,” Kristal said.
“And why do you think turning thirty had something to do with it?” I asked.
“See, men can sense that transition you go through when you exit your twenties and enter your thirties. You are more mature, you think on a different level, and you realize life is not slowing down for you. You get on your grown woman ish, and you start settling down.”
“I was thinking of all that yesterday, at twenty-nine, though,” I said.
“Yeah, you just wait. In a few days you are going to wake up and see life totally different. The change may have already started, but it will soon be solidified,” Kristal assured me.
“I remember when I was thirty,” Ms. Todd said. “I was too hot to trot. My husband could hardly keep up with me.”
We all laughed.
“Is that right? What were you doing, Nana?” I asked.
“Anything I wanted to do that I was scared to do in my twenties. I had figured out I was old enough to know better but young enough to do it, anyway,” she joked.
“Dinner is served, everyone,” Claudia announced.
We all got up from the living room and went into the dining room, where the buffet was spread. It contained all my favorite foods, from chicken Alfredo to fried fish. . . . We had it all.
As we sat down at the fourteen-seat dining room table, I looked at the paintings on the walls. On the wall directly in front of me was a replica of the painting that hung in the bar at the St. Regis. It was the phoenix rising from its ashes. And on the other wall was a picture of James Durham, the first recognized African American physician in the United States. Two different paintings with great meanings. One said you could rise from anything, and the other said you could accomplish anything.
As I surveyed the people in the room, Seth, Ms. Todd, Mom, Dad, and Kristal, I thought about how we had all risen from something to become better individuals. We each had a testimony of endurance, survival, and restoration. Verses from one of my favorite new scriptures, Psalm 66, came to mind.
For thou, O God, hast proved us: thou hast tried us, as silver is tried. Thou broughtest us into the net; thou laidst affliction upon our loins. Thou hast caused men to ride over our heads; we went through fire and through water: but thou broughtest us out into a wealthy place.
God had indeed been good to me and those I love. My parents were doing great, and Mom was happier than I had ever seen her. As time went on, and as God dealt with me, I had to admit, the two of them were made for each other. Sometimes relationships went on a journey of separation, but when it was true, genuine, authentic love, people could find their way back to each other.
Kristal, my ghetto fabulous friend with the big heart, would be joining me on Carson Land as my assistant. I had taken over Melanie's job, after convincing Seth I actually wanted to work for anything I got. Our relationship was blooming, but I was determined not to follow the same path I had always followed. His money meant nothing to me, and if or until I became his wife, I would not spend it like it belonged to me.
Ms. Todd had finally given up the apartment at the senior housing facility and had decided to move back to Carson Land. She was still taking her dialysis twice a week but seemed to be happier and healthier being around those that she loved and cared about the most. She reminded Seth and me on a weekly basis that we needed to hurry and get married so she could live to see her great-grandchildren.
And Seth.
I looked over at him and partially listened as he talked to my mom about the strawberry patch. He was the kindest, sweetest, and most gentle man I had ever met. If I had to sit down and create a sketch or a description of a character in one of those romance novels that described the perfect man for me, he would fit it entirely. He had taught me how to love myself and know my value. He treated me as if I was as precious as the Hope Diamond. He loved over all my flaws and loved me through my failures and disappointments. And to this day, and even though my divorce had been finalized three months ago, he refused to dishonor me by sleeping with me outside of marriage.
What a man! What a man!
All of them combined had taught me something different that I did not know a year ago, and on this thirtieth birthday I was simply grateful.
My dad tapped his crystal glass with his fork to get everyone's attention.
“I just have a few words to say about my daughter before we bless the food and eat,” he said. He turned to look at me. “Baby girl, you are the light of my world, and you have been since the day you were born. My actions have not always matched what I have felt, but you mean so much to me. I want to apologize to you again for not being directly involved in your life while you were growing up. If I could get those years back and relive them, I would. But I am grateful to God that He has seen fit for us to make the rest of our days the best of our days. I am honored to be your father, and I am honored to be able to share the first birthday with you since that year I gave you that herringbone necklace.”
He reached down beside his chair and retrieved a bag. “I scraped up every penny, dime, and nickel to buy you that herringbone all those years ago. It took everything I had, but I was determined to get it for you because I knew how badly you wanted it. Well, God has blessed me more since then. Thankfully, I do not have to struggle the way I used to. So today, baby, I want to replace that necklace with this one,” he said, handing me a blue Tiffany bag. “Your mother told me you still had the herringbone, and I am sure when you look at it, you think back to a time when you were happy as a little girl, but the happiness slips away when you think about how I left you. I pray that every time you wear this new necklace, you will feel happiness and know that this time . . . Daddy is not going anywhere. I am here for the long haul, my sweet darling.”
By the time he finished speaking, I was in his arms, crying like a baby. The Tiffany necklace meant nothing to me in this moment. This moment was all about me being Daddy's little girl again, and that was exactly what I felt likeâhis little girl.
When we had both found an escape from our tears, I opened the box, and in it was a sterling silver Tiffany Notes round pendant that had the letter
A
on it. It was absolutely gorgeous. I gave him another hug and composed myself the best I could.
I went back to my seat, and as if I had not cried enough, I cried more when everybody took turns telling me what I meant to them. By the time everyone had said their peace, Claudia and the staff had to take the food back and reheat it.
“While we are waiting on the food to come back out, I would like to say something else,” Seth said. “I did not say much a minute ago, because I was saving my full speech for later, but I guess I will say it now.” He walked over to me. “Allyson Chase, you have changed my life in more ways than you will ever know. I did not know what the missing piece in my life was until that day you walked into my office. Now that you are here, my breathing is off rhythm when you are not around. And I have concluded, if I have to go a day without you, I would just as soon disappear from earth. I would just as soon die.
“Scientists have this theory that the world came about through some big bang theory. We know that is not true. We know God created the world and everything in it. But their theory isn't all bad, because when I met you, our two souls collided, and out came this beautiful love that we share. I would be a fool to spend another day contemplatingâor even praying aboutâmy future with you. I already know what it is.
“So, Allyson Chase, let's make a deal. I have a contract right here that I would like for you to sign, and before you get upset, just hear me out. The agreement details are as follows. One, you will accept my love for the rest of your life. Two, you will love me until the day you die. Three, you will have as many of my babies as you want to have.” He got down on one knee. “Tiffany has a slogan. It says, âTrue love grows, year by year, hand in hand, better and better.' And I totally agree with them. So what do you say? Will you give me the honor of being my wife?”
He pulled a Tiffany box from his pocket, opened it, and removed the most flawless diamond I had ever seen. Being familiar with Tiffany, I recognized it as being the Tiffany Novo diamond. I looked at my dad, who was grinning from ear to ear. I looked at everyone else. They were giving me nods of approval.
“Somebody give me a pen,” I said.
I could tell everyone was baffled. My mother handed me a pen.
I looked Seth in his eyes. “I signed my life away once before to the wrong man. But I trust you, and I know God created you for me. So today I agree to sign my life away . . . again. To the right man.” I signed his mock agreement. “And my answer is yes. Yes, I will marry you, Seth Carson!” I screamed. I jumped up from my seat and into his arms.
He swung me around, almost knocking over Claudia, who was coming back into the room with the food.
“Perfect timing,” I heard Dad say.
I kissed Seth until you could not tell where his lips ended or where mine began.
To God be the glory for the wonderful things He had done in my life.
Epilogue
Many waters cannot quench love, neither can the
floods drown it.
Â
âSong of Solomon 8:7a
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“We have gathered here today before God and these witnesses to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony. We believe that God has joined them together and no man shall separate them. The bride and groom have written their own vows and would like to share them at this time,” the preacher said.
“Honey, God has given me another chance at love. I dare not take this opportunity for granted. You are the beat of my heart, you are the melody in my song, and you are the blues in my thigh,” he said as the crowd laughed no doubt recognizing that last part as a line from the movie
Love Jones.
“You are the woman who calms me and settles me when I become afraid of growing old. You are the woman who completes meâmakes me whole. We cannot get the time we lost back, but we can redeem the time by enjoying the love we share now,” he declared.
“Darling, I would have never thought I would find my way back down Lovers' Lane. I had given up on love. My heart had waxed cold, but you came back into my life and gave me warmth, which started my love flowing again. I wish I could tell you I had all the answers. I wish I knew what the future holds. But all I know is we are two imperfect people serving a perfect God, who makes all things new. And I am grateful that He did not restore our love, but He made it new,” she said.
There was not a dry eye in the church as my mom and dad got married for the second time around. The love in the building was almost tangible.
Then the preacher said, “I want to read a passage of scripture from the book of I Corinthians, the thirteenth chapter, and verses four through thirteen from the Message version. It reads, âIf I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love. Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut. Doesn't have a swelled head. Doesn't force itself on others, isn't always âme first,' doesn't fly off the handle, doesn't keep score of the sins of others, doesn't revel when others grovel, takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, puts up with anything, trusts God always, always looks for the best, never looks back, but keeps going to the end.'
“âLove never dies. Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always incomplete. But when the complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled. When I was an infant at my mother's breast, I gurgled and cooed like an infant. When I grew up, I left those infant ways for good. We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us! But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.'”
The audience clapped as he concluded reading a very famous passage of scripture for weddings. He then led them through the ring ceremony, the lighting of the unity candle, and the proclamation.
“You may kiss your bride,” he said to my dad.
My father took my mother's face in his hands and kissed her passionately. I was almost repulsed looking at them kiss, but sitting next to me was Seth, who was the perfect distraction. He looked down at me and kissed me on the lips.
“Soon that will be us,” he whispered.
“I know, and I absolutely cannot wait until that day,” I whispered back.
“Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you again Mr. and Mrs. Lawrence Chase,” the preacher announced.
The church erupted in applause.
I would have never imagined a year and a half ago, when I got married, that I would now be divorced and engaged again. And I certainly never anticipated my parents getting back together. A lot could happen in a short period of time. It all started with a wrong wedding and ended up with a right one.
The reception hall was elegantly decorated. I had tried to convince my mother to bling everything out, but she had opted for the simple, classy feel. She had said that at their age, a big wedding and a fancy reception were the furthest things from her mind. She was no longer trying to impress anyone but wanted to do what made her happy so she could get on with living.
“Mom, Dad, you both look great,” I said as things were coming to an end. “You made me very proud today.” I kissed them both on the cheek.
“We are equally as proud of you. In less than six months you will get your second chance at love, and this time, just like this time is for us, it will last,” Mom said.
“I believe it, Mom. So what time do you leave for your cruise?”
“We fly out of Atlanta to Miami at six in the morning. I think the ship leaves around ten,” Mom replied.
“Okay, you all enjoy yourselves. Don't come back with any babies.”
“And why not, Allyson? Are you afraid you won't be the baby girl anymore?” Dad asked.
“No, I am afraid I will lose my parents in your attempt to be the new Sarah and Abraham.”
We all laughed. I hugged them, Seth came up to wish them a safe trip, we said our good-byes, and Seth and I left.
We boarded the chopper and headed back to Carson Land. As I always did, I leaned my head back against the headrest and thanked God for another day. It had been wonderful.
“What's on your mind?” Seth asked.
“Oh, nothing much. Just reflecting on the day. It was beautiful. I am genuinely happy for my parents.”
“Indeed it was. And I am happy for them too. Everyone deserves to feel love and be in love.”
“I agree.”
“What do you want to do tomorrow?”
“Sleep. I am exhausted. Between helping Mom plan her wedding, planning another one of my own, and running things around Carson Land . . . I am spent.”
“I totally understand. You should be.”
“Did you have something in mind for us to do? Why did you ask?”
“Not at all. I just wanted to know how I could cater to you.”
He always knew how to make me smile and feel like a queen. He picked up my foot, slid my shoe off, and massaged my heel and arch. I slid down a little in my seat and relished the stellar treatment.
As I settled into the embrace of relaxation, my thoughts detoured to a replay of my life. In spite of my rough childhood, my bumpy teenage years, and my unhealthy young adult years, God had kept me. Through danger seen and unseen, He had kept me. Many times the devil could have taken me out, but even when I did not know it, I had angels watching over me.
It was unknown to me what God had in store for me, but since He had done a good job thus far at leading and guiding me, I knew I would forever put my trust in Him to continue doing so. He had turned my tears of sorrow into tears of joy. He had turned my mourning into dancing. He had restored my soul. Even when I did not know to pray, He was patient with me until I learned to pray.
Who couldn't serve a God like mine?
“What are you smiling about?” Seth asked.
I opened my eyes and looked at him. “Just thinking about the goodness of the Lord.”
“A woman that prays is so attractive.”
I smiled. “Is that right?”
“Yep. Complete and total turn-on.”
“Well, you just wait until I become your wife so I can show you what a turn-on is.”
“I was thinking. Why do we have to have a wedding? Let's get married tonight.”
“Ha! Are you getting fresh with me, Dr. Carson?” I grinned mischievously.
“I'm just saying. We could get married tonight so you can back up all this talking you are doing.”
“Get your mind right, mister. In due time, you will have me and as much of me as you want.”
“I already have the part of you I wanted the most.”
“And what part is that?”
“Your heart.”