Protective Love (Hidden Secrets) (32 page)

Staring at him, I swore he just asked me to marry him.  No, he couldn’t have done that; I was damaged and
we had only been together for about nine months.  I looked down at the box.

Oh, he asked me all right.
 

The ring was gorgeous! It was a round cut diamond in the center with four small diamonds on either side set on a platinum band.  The ring caught the light of the moon and shimmered.  When I looked up, he was watching me.  If I wasn’t mistaken, there were tears in his eyes and he looked worried.  I looked back down at the ring again.  He was asking me to marry him.
 

I looked back into his eyes
.

“Y-yes.  Yes, I will marry you, Jason!” 

He pulled the ring out of the box and slid it on my finger.  It was then that a tear slid down his cheek.  He pulled me into his arms and kissed with so much passion that it took my breath away. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pressed myself closer to him.  Kissing him was an experience all on its own.  The feel of his soft, smooth lips gliding on mine, the feel of his silk like tongue sliding against mine; it all just took on a feeling of its own and drove me freaking crazy!

He moaned softly as he pulled me closer to him.  I could feel his erection digging into my stomach.  A shiver of excitement and nervousness ran through me.  Jason’s mouth moved to trail kisses along my jaw and up to my ear.

“I love you so much, Kayla.” He whispered before nibbling on my ear.

“I love you too, Jason.” I breathed.

His mouth moved back to mine, and he kissed me deeper and more intense than before.  My knees gave out causing him to tighten his hold on me.  He continued to kiss me as he lowered us to the ground.  He sat with his legs crossed and pulled me over to his lap so I straddled him.

Jason ran his hands up and down my back as he kissed me deeper.  His hands cupped my ass and pulled me closer to him.  I gasped at the feeling of his hardness pressing against the spot that ached for him.  Without realizing what I was doing, I began to grind into him.  His growl vibrated through his chest and into mine.

Jason and I had played the oral game for a while.  Mary had told me that it would be a good compromise and would buy me time until I was ready to go all the way.  She said guys love oral just as much as they love sex.  She did tell me that he wouldn’t be happy with it forever, but it would give me time to figure out how to banish my fears and try to enjoy what had been only in my nightmares before.

Even though we
had done that, he still had not seen me naked.  The closest he had come was that night in the hospital.  I couldn’t bring myself to get over the fear of him seeing all my scars and be completely repulsed by me.  I loved him.  I didn’t want to lose him over that.

He broke the kiss and rested his head on my chest
, breathing heavily.  There was no talking for a minute.  We just sat there holding each other, catching our breath.  He pulled his head back and looked at me with his beautiful eyes and amazing smile and I was lost immediately.

“I’m sorry, I got carried away. It seems I do that a lot around you.  You have no idea how happy you have made me today, sunshine.  I will give you the happily ever after of your dreams, baby.  I promise you will.”

Taking a deep breath, I knew it was now or never.  If I was going to fully give myself to him, tonight would be that night.  There was no way I wanted to go on that way, and him feeling like he has to tip toe around me.  It was time to start replacing all these nightmares with good things; things that only Jason could give me.

“Can you do something for me?” I tried to keep my voice steady as I spoke.

“Anything for you, my love?  Just tell me and I will do it.”

I swallowed hard and almost began to panic.  He cupped my face tenderly in his hands and looked into my eyes
, and all my panic disappeared, leaving me with only the love and happiness he gave me.

“Will you make love to me?” I breathed.

He froze and stared at me.  For a moment my panic returned and I felt like I shouldn’t have said anything to him.  Just as I was about to get up and try to walk away with as much dignity as I could muster, he shook his head and swallowed.

“Are
… are you sure?  I don’t want you to do anything that you are not ready for.  So if you feel like I’m-”

I had to cut him off.  It hadn’t crossed my mind that he might think like I felt forced into moving to this step of the relationship and
, I definitely didn’t want him to feel that way.

“Jason, I have been going over this in my head for a while now.  You make me feel safe
, even with that psycho out there.  You make me laugh when everything around me is falling in on me.  You give me love when I feel like I just don’t deserve any.  Now I want you to give me the very last piece to my puzzle.  I want you to love away all my nightmares and scares.  Give me a reason to not fear a touch or a kiss.  Show me that when you love someone the act is more of a connection than domination.  Make love to me now, because you love me.  Make love to me now because you need me - long for me.”

Jason’s mouth was on mine again.  There was a sense of desperation in this kiss, but more
importantly, there was love, desire, passion as he kissed me.  His hand moved up to the top of my zipper on the dress.  Slowly he lowered it down.  Before I realized it, he was pulling my dress over my head.  He broke the kiss only long enough to pull it all the way off.

I pushed his jacket off his shoulders and began to slowly unbutton his shirt.  Once the last button was opened, I ran my hands up his bare chest.  The feel of his hot skin under my hands felt like nothing I can describe.  He had a small amount of chest hair to dust across him and the ridges of all his muscles.  While I explored his chest, he removed his jacket and shirt completely.

Rolling us over, Jason
lay on top of me.  He was still in his pants and me in my panties.  He continued to kiss me as he rocked his hips into me.  I moaned at the feeling he was creating.  A tingling sensation ran through me from head to toe and back to my core where it seemed to build.  Jason ran his fingers up my side until he cupped one of my bare breasts. 

His mouth left mine as he trailed soft kisses and nips down my neck until his mouth covered my nipple.  My body arched into him.  His hand trailed down and slid into my panties.  He ran his fingers over my clit
, causing my hips to jerk up.

The need to know what he would feel like inside me spurred my hands into action and I had his pants undone and his erection freed before he could tease me another second longer.  Jason sat back and took the remainder of his clothes off before pulling
my panties off.

“Are you sure about his, sunshine?”

“Yes.” I answered without hesitation.

For the first time in my life, I wanted
it; I wanted to have sex.  Moving between my legs, I could feel his tip at my entrance.  Sucking in a deep breath, I closed my eyes and waited.  He pushed in slowly and I tensed.

“Kayla
, look at me.”

Slowly I opened my eyes and
was immediately lost in his eyes.  In them, I could see the love and the desire for me.  It made me relax.  He started to move in a little more.  I tensed again.  It was involuntary.  I couldn’t control it, and I was worried that it was going to ruin our evening.

Leaning down, Jason took my lips in a kiss unlike any other.  It was a kiss that spoke volumes and screamed desires.
It made me forget everything, but the feel of his lips on me.  It wasn’t until he moaned that I realized he was all the way in.

“God, Kay.  You feel
… damn,” he breathed.

He started to move in slow, shallow thrusts.  Nothing to
o drastic, and I was thankful.  The slow movements allowed me to get used to the feeling and the need for him to make love to me started growing again.

He was trembling
, and I knew it was because he was trying to stay in control.  It made me love him all the more.  His thrusts were now slow, long, deep thrusts that had both of us moaning with pleasure.

“I’m okay, Jason.  Please just make love to me
,” I breathed between each of his thrusts.

Jason stared at me for a moment before finally moving faster.  At first it was overwhelming, but soon my le
vel of desire was there with him and I was raising my hips to meet each of his thrusts.  My nails dug into his back and down to his butt.  I wrapped my legs around his waist and lifted myself into him, taking him deeper.  Then I felt it.  I felt the build start.  It started in my toes and worked its way up.

“Oh God! Jason!” I moaned as my orgasm took over me and spread through the rest of my body.  It was like it was the fourth of July behind my
eyelids.  I cried out again as another wave coursed through me.

“I. Love. You. Kayla.”  He grunted between his thrusts.

His thrusts were becoming erratic and sweat covered each of our bodies.  I opened my eyes looking in his again.  He sped up his movements even faster and I rose up and took his mouth with mine.  The feeling was incredible.  I didn’t know anything could feel so good.  I didn’t know that you could literally feel your souls come together in a connection like that.  A connection.  That was such a mild term for what I was feeling.

There it
was again.  Not as intense, but still as overwhelming.  I broke the kiss and fell back, pushing my head into the grass beneath me.  He supported his weight on his forearms and thrust faster and more erratic.  It was as if he couldn’t control himself any longer.

“Jason…” I whispered right before my orgasm took over me.  I was coming down when I heard Jason moan.

“Shit, Kayla!”  He moaned loudly. 

It was the sexiest sound I had ever heard.  He seemed to be having just as intense of a climax as I had and several
short, erratic thrusts later he collapsed on top of me.  We laid there, both of us are trying to catch our breaths.  He rolled us to the side and he cradled me in his arms still breathing heavy.

After a few minutes of lying there, I shivered.  The sun had gone down some time before we started to make love and it was starting to cool off.
 

I just made love to the most amazing man under the moon and stars.  AND
, we are engaged!  Oh. My. God.  I’m engaged.  I, Kayla Williams,  am engaged to be married.

I shivered again.  He wrapped me in his arms tighter and kissed my head.

“Maybe we should gather our stuff and head up to my house?”

I nodded my
head, unable to say anything at the moment.  I redressed, as did he.  We collected our picnic and walked back up to the car.  The drive was short and quiet, but when his house came into view, my breath left my lungs.  It was stunning. It was a two story log cabin built on a drop off that overlooked his lake.  When you first drive up on the house you see a wrap around deck to the back of the house toward the lake.  Down below the wrap around deck is a three bay garage.  If you continue around, there is a small front porch and on the other side of that a two car garage that connects to the log house.

“This is my house.  I built it with
the help of a crew of course, but I did as much as I could on my own.  All the logs used to build the house were from the trees that I cleared for me to build my house.  I then planted new trees to replace the ones I cut down elsewhere on my property.  This is a private lake.  I own about 1000 acres of land in total.  I love the outdoors and I wanted to have my turn in protecting it.  I wanted to have a place that I could come home and completely relax after work.”

“It is so beautiful.” I whispered.

He laughed.

“Come one, sunshine.  Let me show you the inside.  Just leave everything out here.”

When you walk in the entryway, you walk into the foyer.  In front and off to the left a little was a coat closet and further to the left was a guest half bath.  To the right were stairs that led upstairs.  If you walked straight ahead, you walked into the great room.  The whole back wall was glass either by windows or doors.  The view was breathtaking.  To the left was the kitchen and dining room it was all open concept.  My first stop was in the kitchen.

There was an island with a cook top in it and seating around.  The counters were
gray granite with oak cabinets.  There were dual wall ovens, double sinks, and a walk in pantry. 

“This kitchen is amazing!  It is exactly like my dream kitchen.  My
kitchen is too small.  Wow!  You must love cooking in here,” I said running my hands along the countertops.

He then led me to a little hallway. There was a door straight in front
, and then another to the right.  The door to the right led to the mudroom and out to the garage.  The door straight in front led to Jason’s room.  This room had floor to ceiling windows with double doors that lead out to the deck.  There was a huge walk in closet.

“Wow, this
closet is as big as the bathroom in my house,” I laughed. 

Next to the walk in closet was the master bath.  A whirlpool Jacuzzi tub, separate shower complete with built in bench seating, three shower heads and jets on all sides, double vanity
, and of course the toilet.