Quest for the Sun Orb (23 page)

Poor Tomas.  If he felt half of what she’d just felt, she didn’t know how he lived with such pain.  She placed her cup back on the saucer, using her fingers to be sure she put it down correctly. 

“You now doubt yourself,” she guessed.  “You wonder what is wrong with you that the one man you trusted above all others turned out to be the least trustworthy.”

“Yes,” Tomas said, surprised.  “How did you know?”

“It explains your sadness,” Tiari replied.  “And your pain.”

“How can I trust myself again?” Tomas asked.  “How can I believe in myself when I erred so grievously?”

“I did not know your friend,” Tiari said, after thinking carefully.  “And I know very little about
cin-sahib
.  But Tomas, you would never have befriended an evil man.  This I know.  The blame lies not with you, but with Saigar.  Perhaps he was very good at hiding his true nature.  Or perhaps his nature was good, but something happened to him that you are unaware of that caused him to step onto the wrong path.”

“How can I ever know what the truth is?” Tomas asked.

“I don’t know,” Tiari said.  “I believe that, if it is meant that you will learn, then you will.  The real question is, how long will you blame yourself for not seeing something that was hidden from you?”

“I should have seen it,” Tomas said.  “No one was closer to Saigar than I, yet he very nearly murdered Lady Techu in her bed and I had no clue that he was capable of such a thing.  If he had succeeded, I don’t know how I could have lived with the guilt.  As it is, I find it difficult.”

Tiari nodded slowly.  This went much deeper than she’d thought.  Simple words were not going to help Tomas.  He needed more than that.  “Tomas, have you spoken to Karma, or Prince Zakiel about this?”

“No, I have not,” Tomas said, surprised by the question.

“I think that you should,” she said. 

“Why?”

“When you have wronged someone, it is appropriate to apologize, is it not?” she asked.  “Not that I think you wronged them, but
you
do.  Perhaps talking with them about this will help you.”

“I don’t know, Tiari,” Tomas said.  “I will think on it.”

Tiari decided a change of subject was in order.  “Do you think I look like a fool, staring at nothing?” she asked, tilting her head and smiling.

“Of course not,” Tomas replied heatedly.  Then he noticed her smile.  “You are teasing me?”

“Yes, a bit,” she admitted.  “I know that even should you agree with Una, you would not say such a thing to me.  You are a good man, Tomas.”

“Why do you think I am good?” Tomas asked before he could stop himself.  “Few people do, you know.”

“No, I do not know that,” she replied.  “And I don’t
think
you are good, I
know
it.  Your aura tells me.”

“What is an aura?”

“It is difficult to explain,” she said.  “It appears to me as a colored light that surrounds you.  Your aura is blue, like the sky on a bright spring day.  The first time that I saw you there was a lot of gray in it, and it was very small, and I knew that you suffered great sorrow.  Now, it is larger, and brighter, though there is more gray around the edges now that you’ve been thinking of Saigar.  You are happier now, I think, in spite of your sadness.  But there is no evil in you, Tomas.  If there was, I would see it.”

“I thought you could not see after the sun went down,” he said.

“I do not see auras with my eyes,” she replied.  “And please, don’t ask me how I see them because I do not know.  I only know that I do.  I also know that just now your aura brightened considerably.  Why is that?”

“Probably because you have just told me that there is no evil in me,” Tomas replied. 

“You thought that you were evil?” Tiari asked in disbelief.  “How could you think such a thing about yourself?”  As soon as the words were out of her mouth she knew the answer.  “Saigar.”

“Yes, Saigar,” Tomas agreed.  “I feared that my friendship with him, and my blindness toward his evil, meant that I was evil as well.”

“I suppose that makes sense,” Tiari said.  “But it is not correct.  You are not evil, Tomas.  I really think you must discuss this with Prince Zakiel and Karma.  She is Lady Techu, speaker for the dead, is she not?”

Tomas blinked in surprise.  Why had he not thought of that?  “If I decide to speak with them, would you mind coming with me?”

“You would want me there?” Tiari asked in surprise. 

“Yes,” Tomas replied.  As he spoke, he looked up to see Kapia entering from the neighboring tent and leapt to his feet.

“Good evening, Cousin,” he said politely.

“Hello, Tomas,” Kapia replied.

“Are you all right?” Tiari asked, hearing the tension in Kapia’s voice.

“Yes, and no,” Kapia said with a short laugh.  “I’m worried about Bredon, mostly.”

“Sir Bredon is both intelligent, and strong,” Tomas said.  “If anyone can get through the trials he now faces, he can, and will.”

“Thank you, Tomas,” Kapia said.  She stepped forward and impulsively threw her arms around his waist, hugging him tightly.  “It means a lot to me that you think that, and that you are trying to reassure me, Cousin.”

“It means a lot to me that you would so easily forgive my years of stupidity,” Tomas said in a low voice.  “Thank you, Kapia.”

Kapia gave Tomas one more squeeze, then stepped back.  “I don’t wish to be rude, but I must go to bed at once.”

“Of course,” Tomas said.  “I will get out of your way.”

“You are not in the way, Tomas,” Kapia said quickly.  “Please, stay and keep Tiari company.”

Once Kapia was gone, Tomas sat down again.  “The reason I came to see you this evening was to let you know that I’ve found a blade that I think will be prefect for you,” he said. 

“Really?” Tiari asked, excited.  “May I see it?”  She blushed.  “I meant, may I touch it, since obviously I cannot see at the moment.”

“I understood you,” Tomas said, smiling at her blush.  “I’m afraid I cannot let you touch it until Nikura examines it first.  It belonged to Saigar, and I will take no chances with your health and well being.”

“I understand,” she said.  She was disappointed, but also pleased that Tomas seemed to care that much about her. 

“If Nikura clears it, I will need another day or two to make some preparations.  After that, how soon would you like to begin your lessons?”

“Right away, if that’s all right with you, Tomas,” she said. 

“That’s very all right with me,” he replied.

Tiari’s face lit up.  “I can hardly wait.  Are you sure you don’t mind teaching me?”

“I’m positive,” Tomas replied.  “In truth, I am looking forward to it as much as you are.”

“You are such a kind man, Tomas,” Tiari said before yawning widely.  “Please excuse me,” she said, blushing again.  “As much as I would like to stay up and talk away the night with you, I’m afraid that I’m not used to long days in the saddle.”

“I remember what that’s like, believe it or not,” Tomas said.  “We will have more opportunities to talk, should you wish it.”

“That makes it easier for me,” she said.  Tiari stood up, glad that she’d had a few days to learn the layout of the tent.  She didn’t want to make a fool of herself in front of Tomas by walking into the walls or tripping over something. 

“Your bath is ready, if you still want it,” Lashi said from behind her.  Tiari considered skipping it.  After her long conversation with Tomas she wanted nothing more than to go to bed where she could go over it in her mind, word for word, and commit it to memory as she fell asleep.  But she knew how much time and effort had gone in to preparing a tub of hot water for her, and she would not let Lashi’s work go to waste.

“Thank you, Lashi,” she said.  “Goodnight, Tomas.”

“Sleep well, Tiari,” Tomas said, his voice sounding oddly strangled to her ears.  Her smile faltered a little.  Had she said something wrong?  She couldn’t ask him with Lashi standing right beside her, so she turned and went through the flap into her sleeping chamber. 

Tomas stood there for a few long moments, staring at the flap of heavy fabric that separated him from Tiari as images of her in a tub of steaming water rolled through his mind.  He could see her so clearly; her pale skin glistening with moisture, strands of damp hair framing her face, her blue eyes heavy lidded, her sweet lips turned up in an inviting smile.  He shook his head in an effort to dispel the images, and resolutely turned his back on the entrance to her chamber.  Perhaps it would be best if he spent the next hour or so guarding the women’s tent from the outside, in the cool, fresh air.

Chapter Thirteen

“Bredon?  Can you hear me, Bredon?”

“Yes, I can hear you,”
Bredon said, wondering if she could hear the sheer relief in his mental voice
.  “I had almost decided you wouldn’t be able to speak with me tonight.”

“I’m sorry, Bredon,”
Kapia said. 
“I was speaking with Zakiel.  He wants me to ask if you can tell him where you are.”

Bredon had expected this ever since he’d spoken to Kapia the night before.  He knew he’d have to provide Zakiel with some landmark that was significant enough to appear on one of his charts, and had been on the lookout all day. 

“Tell Zakiel that I’m watching for something that will help him to mark my location,”
he said. 
“I’ve been traveling through an area of rolling hills and small woods for two days now, but I’ve seen no people, no mountains, no water large enough to be anything but seasonal.  As soon as I see something, I’ll let you know.”

“All right, I’ll tell him,”
Kapia replied. 
“Using what you told me last night, Zakiel figures you are about two weeks from Darkly Fen right now.  Give or take.”

“Thank you, Kapia, that helps a lot,”
Bredon said with some relief.  He hated not knowing where he was, or how far he was from his destination, but Marene was being incredibly secretive on that subject.
  “How are you, Kapia?  Are you well?”

“It helps a great deal that I can speak with you now, Bredon,”
she replied. 
“I miss you so much, and I worry about you all the time.”

“I’m sorry to put you through so much distress,”
he said. 
“I would not have done so had I any other choice.”

“I know that, Bredon,”
she replied. 
“I would not have expected anything from you other than what you did.  I’m just feeling a bit sorry for myself I suppose.”

“I’ve never known you to indulge in self-pity, Kapia, and I’ve known you since the day of your birth.  Somehow, I doubt you’ve taken up the practice now.”

“Bredon, I have a confession to make,”
Kapia said hesitantly. 
“I don’t want to make you angry, but I have to tell you this.”

“You can tell me anything, Kapia,”
Bredon said. 
“What is it?”

“It’s about your knife, Mintaka-Til.  It had dark magic in it, from Marene.  It’s how she found us when we went to claim the Moon Orb.  I couldn’t keep carrying it, but I couldn’t just throw it away either, so I left it in the cradle where the Moon Orb was.  I’m so sorry, Bredon.  You entrusted it to me, and I know I let you down, but honestly, I didn’t know what else to do.”

“It’s all right, Kapia,”
Bredon said. 
“Do not worry yourself so.  Worrow told me that the knife was tainted.  I’m the one who must apologize to you for giving you a gift that put you in such danger.  I promise you, I am not upset with you, and I’m glad that you no longer carry it.  There is nothing, no one, more important to me than you, Kapia  Thank you for putting it in a safe place, though.  I would have understood had you tossed it into the sea.
”

“I couldn’t do that,”
Kapia said. 
“One day, I will return for it.  When all of this is over and the world is safe again.”

“One day, you and I will go and retrieve it, together,”
Bredon said.

“I like that idea very much,”
Kapia said.

“Your voice is growing faint,”
Bredon said. 
“Are you getting tired?”

“Yes, I’m afraid so,”
she replied. 
“Before we stop, did you learn anything new about the artifact from Marene?”

“Not very much,”
Bredon replied. 
“She told me it was a scepter of some sort, left behind by some demons, but other than that I got nothing useful.  I’ll keep trying.”

“
All right, I’ll let Zakiel know,”
Kapia said, her voice so soft now that he had to strain to hear her.

“How much of a toll does this take on you?”
Bredon asked. 
“Physically, I mean.”

“It’s more draining than I expected,”
Kapia admitted. 
“But I don’t care.  It lets me talk with you.”

“I care,”
Bredon said.  “
As much as it means to me to hear your voice, I think you must limit yourself.  Perhaps once a week?”

 “No, Bredon, that is not enough,”
she objected. 
“I admit I don’t think I can do this every day.  But please, not once a week.”

“What do you suggest then?”
Bredon asked.

“Every other day.”

“No, that is too much,”
Bredon said. 
“How about twice a week?”

“All right,”
Kapia said reluctantly. 
“If I become stronger, I’ll contact you more often though.”

“Agreed,”
Bredon said. 
“Right now I barely can hear you, my beloved, so please, go and rest now.”

 
“Goodnight, Bredon.  I will try to speak with you again on the third night after tonight.”

“I’m already looking forward to it, surna,”
Bredon replied. 
“Sleep well, and please, take care of yourself.”