Redemption (6 page)

Alicia only nodded and went to the sink for a cup of water. Dampening the comb, she drew it through his hair and then made her first cut. Uneven bits of hair fell to the kitchen floor and she blinked. Once she’d made the initial cut, she was committed.

Moving in a half circle, she trimmed and evened out the length of his hair, dampening as she went. And then she was faced with the front, where it hung over his forehead. “How do you want this part cut?” she asked.

“Your guess is as good as mine,” he told her. “However it looks best to you.”

She leaned from the side and gauged the first snip, only to have her wrist caught in his grip. “Step around in front of me,” he told her. “I promise not to bite, Alicia.”

Too close…she was too close to him. Too near the masculine scent of him, that musky blend she’d come to associate with this man, and the aroma of shaving soap that emanated from his skin. He’d shaved today, a fact she’d noted upon arrival. For her benefit? She smiled at the thought.

“What’s so funny?” he asked, barely moving his lips as though he might disturb her concentration.

“Nothing. I was thinking of something else,” she said hastily. Then she moved even nearer, her legs touching the front of his chair, the pressure of his right
knee against her thigh. It was an intimate touch, his body heat radiating through her dress and petticoat. Beneath her fingertips, his face assumed a solemn look as she lifted the hair from his forehead and cut it in soft layers. The trembling she could not control threatened to botch her task before it was well under way.

He closed his eyes and she blew softly at the small clippings that fell on his cheeks. His nose wrinkled at that and she laughed, a soft sound that stilled his nose from wiggling and appeared to halt his breathing. Then his eyes opened—dark orbs that seemed to see beneath her skin, to the woman she kept concealed. She tensed, a shiver of anticipation traveling the length of her spine.

“You have lovely eyes,” he said quietly. “I thought your hair was brown, but it isn’t, is it? It’s the color of chestnuts, sort of a ruddy hue.”

She paused, holding the scissors upright. “Chestnuts?”

Again he smiled, and she stepped away from him, her fingers still tingling from the moments spent buried in his silken hair. He smiled at her, one corner of his mouth twitching. And yet, more than amusement lit his gaze as he searched her face and posed an idle query.

“Haven’t you ever picked up horse chestnuts in the late summer and shucked them?”

She hesitated, not entirely trusting her voice to be steady. “No, I can’t say I have,” she replied, feeling
she’d succeeded, her breathing steadier now that she was no longer held a willing captive by his warmth.

“I’ve done that, Miss Merriweather,” Jason said eagerly, perching on the edge of his chair. “We play stuff with them. Kinda shoot them like marbles.”

“I didn’t do much playing when I was a child, Jason. You’re a fortunate young man to have a father who allows you to play as a young boy should.”

“All the boys play,” Jason said, his brow furrowing as if he did not follow her line of thought.

“And so they should,” she murmured, once more moving closer, the better to finish the task she’d begun. She lifted a lock of hair, drawing it to its full length, then trimmed the edges and allowed it to fall into place. The bits and pieces of shorn hair fell to Jake’s shoulder and she reached automatically to brush them away.

“There,” she announced briskly. “That should do it. I think you look fine, Mr. McPherson.”

The word he murmured beneath his breath made her smile and she repeated it after him.

“Jake.”

T
HE HAMMER HIT THE BOARD
and the nail went in true. “Bravo!” Alicia said, and offered Jason another nail. “We’ll be hiring you out as a handyman before you know it,” she told him.

“I suspect we can find enough for him to do right
here for a few days,” Jake said from his place on the porch. He’d rolled out the door, stopping the chair a foot from the edge. Alicia had given the railing a dubious look, wondering if it was as sturdy as it should be, and felt a sense of relief when Jake moved no closer.

“I told Miss Merriweather I could do a lot of fixin’ stuff around here.” The boy was filled with his own importance this afternoon, and Alicia rejoiced in it. His eyes glowed, his cheeks were pink, and he smiled and joked without ceasing, it seemed.

“Maybe Miss Merriweather would let you call her Miss Alicia instead?” Jake suggested, aiming a questioning look in her direction as he spoke. “I think as long as you remember her proper name while you’re at school, maybe she wouldn’t mind if you break the rules just a bit after hours.”

Jason’s eyes widened as he considered the idea, then he looked at Alicia, his face earnest as he made his plea. “I’d like that if you don’t think it would be disrespectful, ma’am.”

She felt a churning in her breast and bent her attention fully on the boy. A wave of yearning almost swamped her, spilling over into two tears that made paths down her cheeks. “I think that would be fine,” she said, her words clear and concise, her voice barely trembling. This boy had stolen a part of her heart.

Jake cleared his throat and issued a request. “Jason, do you think you could go out in the kitchen and get two glasses of that lemonade Miss Alicia made for us? My throat is drier than the Sahara Desert.”

The boy grinned. “You’re makin’ jokes again, Pa.” He placed the hammer on the step and sent a warning glance at Alicia. “Just leave it there, Miss Alicia, and I’ll finish up the job when I get back.”

The door closed behind him and Jake bent forward in his chair. “Can I say something to you, Alicia?”

She could only nod, acutely aware of her already teary state. She would not subject the two of them to such a display of sentiment.

“I’ve been thinking about something all day,” Jake said. “I’d like you to be considering it, too.”

She looked at him, frowning at the sober expression he wore. Only a moment ago he’d been smiling. Now he viewed her with a look akin to trepidation. “If you refuse, I’ll understand,” he said. “But at least think about it, will you?”

She was confused. “I don’t think I know what you’re talking about,” she said finally.

“I’d like you to consider marriage, Alicia. To me.” He sat upright again and his expression seemed remote, as if he were lost in a memory to which she would not be allowed access. “You said you did not plan on marriage, but I think you’d be a fine mother to
my son. I’d ask nothing more of you than that you take him under your wing, be a mother to him and tend to his needs. On top of all that, I feel responsible for the damage done to your reputation over the past weeks.”

She opened her mouth, then closed it again. Her words were slow, even though her mind was racing, repeating the phrases he’d used. “I don’t hold you responsible for whatever gossip has been making the rounds, Jake. As to marriage, I’ll admit that I hadn’t thought of such a thing.”

“I’ll see to it you never want for anything,” he told her, pressing on with determination. “I don’t have a lot of money, but we’re comfortable. I have an income from the ranch I own with my brother. He gives me one quarter of the profits, which is fair, since he does one hundred percent of the work. This house is free and clear and is well built.”

She was swamped with myriad emotions. The unexpectedness of his offer—for it could hardly be called a proposal—was more than her mind could absorb. “I…I suppose I’ll have to think about it,” she said.

He nodded and his eyes clouded, as if she’d denied him already. “I understand that I’m no prize,” he said quietly. “I’m hard to get along with, moody and temperamental. I’ve never been known as a nice man, Alicia. I’d probably be demanding, maybe even expect more from you than you’d be willing to give.”

She managed a smile. “I’m sure you must have a few redeeming qualities. I can think of at least one, offhand. You love your son, Jake. That you would consider taking on an old maid for Jason’s benefit says a lot for you as a father.”

“I haven’t looked at you that way,” he said. “I know you told me you’re on the shelf, that you aren’t the sort of woman to marry. But I find that I disagree with you.” He raised his hand to halt her as she began to answer him. “Wait just a second, Alicia. Let me say this. I see you as a woman with a heart full of love for my son. I can ask no more of a wife. You have a beauty of your own.” His eyes warmed as they met hers.

She shook her head. “Don’t think you have to flatter me. I look in the mirror every morning. I know what I look like.” She placed her hands on her hips and then hugged her waist. “I’m broad in the beam, my mama used to tell me. I have too much bosom—it makes me top-heavy.” A flush touched her cheeks as she spoke. “I’m plain as dishwater, Jake. I don’t consider myself a good-looking woman and that’s all right. I’m a fine teacher, and that’s what I’ve always wanted to be. I don’t know if I could be a proper mother to Jason. That’s something I’ll have to think about.”

“I won’t push you for an answer. But there is one thing you need to consider. The damage to your reputation—” He broke off suddenly, turning to the door
as Jason crossed the threshold with two glasses of lemonade held before him. The boy’s tongue was caught between his teeth and a frown furrowed his brow.

“Let me take one of those,” Alicia said, reaching for a glass. She tilted her head back and drank deeply. “I was so thirsty,” she said brightly, thinking of Jake’s unspoken warning, a warning she knew was valid. “Thank you for waiting on us, Jason,” she said, flustered by Jake’s offer. She looked down at the hammer the boy had left on the step. “You’ll notice I didn’t touch your tools while you were gone.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he said, carefully placing the other glass in his father’s hand. He stepped carefully to the ground and lifted the hammer. Alicia handed him another nail and he placed it just so, then drove it home. His smile flashed and she returned it, nodding her approval.

Jake was watching her. She felt his gaze like a ray of sunshine, his eyes offering approval, his smile almost a duplicate of Jason’s.

Jake McPherson was smiling at her, and he’d offered his approval. Indeed, for the second time today his mouth was curved in an unmistakable grin.
Glory be!

T
HE DECISION WAS NOT
difficult to make. She’d already put an acceptance speech together by the time she walked back to her boarding house. Delivering her response might pose a problem, for Alicia feared she would become emotional. Perhaps writing a note would suffice.

No. Jake had made the offer face-to-face. She would do no less in return. The pros outweighed the cons, she’d already decided. Staying single meant being alone for the rest of her life. The likelihood of another man posing the question was unlikely. And Jake had twice spoken of her nicely, complimenting her appearance.
Hair the color of chestnuts
. Indeed.

Her age was a deterrent, for one thing. Then, too, her career as a teacher gave her no guarantee of an income for her old age. She would likely end up in poverty, for no matter how hard she scrimped and saved, her account at the bank showed a remarkably small balance.

The bottom line was that living in that big house would give new meaning to her life. Spending time with Jason would be a joy—although she was too wise not to acknowledge that he would offer her more challenges than you could shake a stick at.

Jake was truly the deciding factor. The man was alone, in every way. It was possible to live without the fellowship of another human being, but it was certainly not a pleasant way to spend your days. If she could find a way to reach him…She shook her head at the thought. Although, the idea of getting to know him better held appeal.

He had described himself well. Hard to get along with. Moody and temperamental. Demanding, and as he’d said, he would expect much from her. There would be no marriage relationship, of that she was certain, for Jake had long since placed a wall between himself and others. She stood no chance of surmounting the obstacles he’d set so firmly in place.

But for the first time in her life, she’d met her match. Another human being who could dish it out in abundance and not cringe when it was tossed back at him. He argued with her, said his piece with fervor and unless she missed her guess, he enjoyed their verbal sparring. Life would not be easy, but she’d find joy in that house with Jake and his son. And perhaps a friendship with the man that would fill her lonely hours.

She slowed her pace as she approached the porch to her boarding house and climbed the steps. The house was quiet, all but for little Catherine, who waved at her from her spot on the parlor couch, a book in her lap. What a contrast the girl was to Jason, who was as needy as a child could be. She looked forward to sorting him out and making a difference in his life.

Alicia sat on her bed after going to her room. She looked around at the small space, wondering what her future home would be like. She hoped for a bedroom with long windows reaching to the floor, with white curtains that might blow in the breeze at night. Perhaps a wardrobe to hold her clothing, not that she owned any great amount. But Jake had promised to provide her with all she needed.

I’ll see to it you never want for anything
. He’d made that promise right off. And if she were any judge of character, she’d put money on his ability to keep his word. Jake McPherson was a man of honor. That he should have given up on life, isolated himself in that big house and withdrawn from society for more than two years was a tragedy.

Alicia paced the floor, unable to sit still, aware that she would not be able to rest well until she’d given him her answer. And yet she must not appear too anxious. She bit her lip, wondering what a reasonable amount
of time to consider the offer might be. Tomorrow? Would she be out of line if she walked back to visit on Sunday, after church perhaps?

When would he want to marry her? Next week? Next month? Or maybe by this time he’d reconsidered the whole idea and realized he’d been impetuous. She halted in the middle of the floor and raised a hand to cover her mouth. Surely not.

The door opened readily as she turned the knob and her feet barely touched the treads as she flew down the stairway. Catherine looked up from her book, eyes wide with alarm.

“Are you all right, Miss Merriweather?” The child had no doubt never seen her reserved teacher move so swiftly in the two years she’d known her.

“Fine, Catherine. I’ll be gone out for a while.”

The way to the McPherson home was becoming familiar to her, the path narrowing as she turned onto the side street.

She arrived, breathless and flustered, at Jake’s front walk. The swinging gate caught her eye and she made a mental note to buy new hinges at the hardware. The clean finish of the new board drew her attention and she slowed to admire Jason’s handiwork before she placed her foot in the center of it.

Then the front door was before her and she reached up with trembling fingers and removed the sign.
No
Visitors. No Peddlers. No Admittance
. Folding it neatly in half, she rapped sharply, then waited. From the length of the hallway, she heard the faint sound of rubber tires meeting the wooden surface of the floor, and then Jake’s face appeared for a moment at the etched glass on the right side of the door.

He opened it, widely, she noticed, and waved her in. “Is something wrong?” he asked, his look one of apprehension. “Has something happened?”

She shook her head, feeling foolish now that she’d rushed over here and was making a spectacle of herself, after having left him only an hour ago. “No, I just thought we needed to talk a bit.”

“I’m in the kitchen, helping Jason with supper.” He turned his chair in a tight circle and nodded. “You’re welcome to lend a hand.”

He was attempting to be hospitable. Perhaps he was making an effort for her benefit.

She followed him, allowed him to push open the swinging door to the kitchen and then hold it for her to enter past him. Jason was at the stove, his back to her.

“Pa, I think I burned the eggs,” he said regretfully. Indeed he had, for there was smoke and an overwhelming charred odor. He looked back over his shoulder, the skillet in his hand, and his mouth fell open. “Miss Merriweather…I mean, Miss Alicia.” The skillet slipped in his pot holder and the dinner hit the floor,
burnt eggs scattering across the wooden surface as if they’d developed a life of their own.

She took the situation in hand, her natural inclination to be helpful coming to the forefront. “Let me have that, Jason,” she said briskly, reaching for the skillet. He obliged, obviously pleased with her interference, and backed away from the mess he’d made. “Find the broom,” she told him, “and the dustpan, too.”

The skillet was placed at the back of the stove and she bent to the task of cleaning the floor.

“You don’t have to do that,” Jake said flatly. “Jason can tend to it.”

“I’m sure he can,” she agreed. “But he could use a hand. And I’m available, after all.”

“Are you?” The smile that touched Jake’s lips asked more than his question suggested.

She stood, reaching for the broom. “About as available as a woman could possibly be, sir. I’m free to make my own choices, and I’ve made one over the past hour.” She began to sweep the floor vigorously. “Would you like to hear my answer to the question you posed out on the front porch?” Her heart beat loudly in her ears as she avoided his gaze. Then she heard his soft chuckle, and looked at him quickly. “Are you laughing at me? Perhaps you’ve changed your mind?”

His eyes were sparkling, and she knew suddenly he’d been a scamp in his younger years. Were it not for
the wheelchair and all it represented, he’d no doubt be popular with the ladies, even now. His mouth was full, his nose a sharp blade, his high cheekbones chiseled, and his hands well-formed.

He answered her questions succinctly. “No and no, Miss Alicia. I don’t ask such an important thing lightly. I considered it long and hard before I made my proposal to you.”

“Was that what it was? A proposal?”

“I didn’t get down on bended knee, if that’s what you’re getting at,” he said with a touch of sarcasm.

Ah, this was the man she knew. “I didn’t expect you to,” she snipped. “But then, I didn’t really expect the question to be posed at all.”

She finished sweeping up the remains and spoke to Jason, whose eyes were tracking the conversation and whose face was set in lines of confusion. “Please get a rag and wipe up the rest,” she told him. “And toss this out into the yard. The birds will eat it. I believe I’ll cook something else for the two of you for supper.”

Jake cleared his throat. “I expected to live as a widower in this house for the rest of my days. But when you showed up at my door that first time, I knew I needed to do something different. For Jason’s sake, if not my own.”

“I gave you the impetus to change things?” she asked.

“That’s a fancy way of saying it, but the answer is
still the same. You prodded me into thinking about the future. Not just my own, but my son’s.” He leaned back in his chair and folded his arms across his chest. “Now I’ll have your answer, ma’am.”

“I repeat, Mr. McPherson. I’m available, and I like the idea of having a house to run and a child to tend. Whether or not I’ll be able to put up with your foolishness is another matter. But I won’t know unless I give it a try, will I?”

He nodded in agreement. “Just one thing. My name is Jake. I’ve heard other women call their husbands by their formal address, but it doesn’t work in my house. If you have to repeat it six or eight times an hour, do so. My name is Jake.”

She took two steps to reach him and extended her right hand. “Shall we honor our bargain by shaking hands?” she asked.

“Yes, I believe we should,” he answered. His wide palm made her strong, capable hand seem as that of a child, she thought. His hands were graceful, but large. As she’d noted earlier, his fingers were long and well formed. He’d been a concert pianist, she’d heard, but decided that was something they would not speak of now.

His eyes were dark with a look she could not decipher and she knew a moment of apprehension. She was committing herself to life with a man she hardly knew.

“Are you changing your mind?” he asked, his tone
mocking, as if he read her hesitant thoughts. He released her hand and watched as she shoved it in her pocket.

“No, not at all,” she answered abruptly. “When I make a decision, I stick with it. You’ll find me to be very predictable, Jake. I don’t make promises lightly, nor do I accept those around me failing to keep theirs.”

“Then I believe we understand each other.” He looked up as Jason came back in the house.

“I did like you said, Miss Alicia.”

“Then wash your hands and help me put a meal together,” she told him. “What shall it be?”

They settled for a jar of beef Cord’s wife had canned up and sent to Jake last fall. From the looks of the pantry shelf, Rachel McPherson took good care of her brother-in-law. At least so far as he allowed it. A jar of small new potatoes, canned with green beans mixed in, was opened and heated in a saucepan, and the beef placed in the skillet.

It was a simple meal, but one well appreciated, if Jason’s and Jake’s appetites were any indication. They ate silently, as if it had been a long time since food last appeared on this table, and Alicia almost feared taking a portion for herself when she noted their enjoyment of the food. Jake passed her the bowls though and nodded as she hesitated.

“The cook always eats at my house,” he said. “Even
when we had a housekeeper, she ate what we ate. I figured it guaranteed us decent meals.”

“Well, that’s something I wouldn’t have thought of,” she said, smiling to herself. The man was canny, his thoughts a whirlwind, if she was any judge. And what he was thinking right now was something she’d give a whole lot to discover.

H
E’D FELT A SENSE OF FEAR
when she’d left earlier, had hoped against hope that he hadn’t botched it with his offhand proposition. He’d certainly not offered her any hearts and flowers, but then he didn’t think she’d have expected soft words and romance. If this arrangement was to work, it must begin on the right foot, so to speak.

Rena had been another story altogether. He’d been smitten with her from the time he was but a wet-behind-the-ears boy of sixteen. His childhood sweetheart had waited for him during the years of his training, then had waited some more while he went off to fight in that miserable war. He’d set her aside, ignored her, treated her unmercifully and still had not been able to put her out of his heart.

Rena had been persistent, and with Rachel as her ally, he hadn’t stood a chance. The years spent with Rena had been a taste of heaven. And her death had plunged him into a torment surely not unlike what hell
must be. He’d thought never to find happiness again. And perhaps he wouldn’t discover any great degree of it now.

But he had a suspicion that life with Alicia Merriweather might offer him some challenges, which might be just what he needed. Not that she could do much to change him. Never again would he leave himself open to the sort of pain he’d suffered when Rena died. Loving a woman was a dicey situation. It offered pleasure for today, but the knowledge that tragedy could strike without warning was enough to make him leery of ever giving that inner part of himself to another woman.

He regarded Alicia as she sat across the kitchen table from him and ate sparingly. He knew she wanted him and Jason to have their fill, so she would deny herself.

“Have some more meat, Alicia,” he said, again offering her the bowl of beef and gravy. She shook her head and smiled.

“I believe I’ve had enough,” she said. “Perhaps Jason would like more.”

Jason would. Not even noticing the gravy that spilled from the spoon, he helped himself to the savory beef, and Jake winced. Alicia would have her work cut out for her; Jason’s manners were atrocious. Rena had made a daily project of reminding the boy of good behavior.
Please
and
thank you
were important words to
learn, she’d said more than once.
A gentleman always holds the door open for a lady
, she’d told him.
Children must ask to be excused from the table
.