Redemption and Regrets (Chastity Falls, #4) (18 page)

“Listen, lady, whatever you came for, it won’t work. I have nothing to give up. Your husband thinks I know the answers to the fucking universe and I don’t. Right now, I kind of wish I did. But I got nothing.”

Annie O’Connor narrowed her eyes slightly as if searching my face for a glimpse of something. Something about the way she carried herself told me she wasn’t her husband’s pawn. The sight of me didn’t disturb her. There was no hint of disgust on her perfectly made up face. In fact, she didn’t even flinch when she first laid eyes on me. No, this wasn’t a woman here to do her husband’s bidding.

So what the fuck did she want?

“Interesting,” she said quietly as if she was talking to herself. “Well, if you won’t let me help you, I guess I’ll excuse myself. I’m truly sorry things ended this way, Braiden. I really am.”

What the hell?

She left the bottle of water in arm’s reach and dragged the chair back to its place at the side of the racks. I watched her as she switched off the light and disappeared into the darkness all the while wondering what the fuck had just happened.

~ Cara ~

A
soft knock on the door startled me, and I wiped away the moisture from my eyes with the sleeve of my old high school track hoodie. “Who is it?” I called out. I’d spent all day holed up in my room unable to face anyone.

“Baby, it’s me, Mom. Open up, I have hot cocoa.”

Shit.
I dashed into the small bathroom adjoining my room, flicked the switch, and checked my appearance. If she saw my tear-stained face, she wouldn’t leave until she had answers. Drawing in a long breath, I ran the faucet and splashed my face with cold water. After drying off with a towel, I was satisfied I looked more tired than heartbroken and went to the door.

“Hi, Mom.” I forced a smile, opening the door fully to let her in. She brushed past me and I closed the door before going to turn on the lamp.

“We haven’t done this in so long, I thought it would be fun, but you look so tired, baby. Should I go?”

“No, no, stay. I’m just wiped. This class is kicking my ass, and I think I still have car-lag, if that’s possible.” I patted the bed for her to sit down. Mom placed the tray of hot cocoa and cookies down on the nightstand and joined me.

“I have to ask, is everything okay with Jason? Things seemed a little tense between you guys at dinner.”

I helped myself to a cookie in hopes that it might mask the tremor in my voice. “He’s ... shit, Mom, you know how he can be. Overprotective and too overbearing. He’s worse than Dad is. I’m at college. College, Mom. I want some freedom to live my life. Is that too much to ask?”

Mom took my hand in hers and laid it on her lap. “Baby, of course, it isn’t, but you knew when you moved to Forest Grove that Jason was the compromise. Your father wouldn’t trust your life to anyone else. He’s a good boy, Cara. He just wants what’s best for you. We all do.”

Oh, really.
I glared at my mother. She would mistake the anger in my eyes for contempt at being treated like a child. If only she knew. But if I told her the truth about Jason, she would go straight to my father and he would either dismiss it as a misunderstanding or he would haul Jason straight into his office and demand answers. And that would only lead to Jason revealing the full truth about Braiden and me.

It was such a mess; I didn’t know what to do for the best. So instead, I squeezed Mom’s hand and said, “I know. It’s just a little much sometimes, you know. I thought when I moved to college, life would be ... easier somehow, I guess.”

“But having Jason there makes it complicated?”

“Not complicated. Just, I don’t know, he’s a constant reminder of home.”
And I never want to see him again.

Mom’s eyes softened, but her smile was anything but happy. “Cara, was life really that bad here? I know your father can be difficult, but he loves you. More than anything.”

Braiden’s bloodied face flashed in my mind, and I choked down the urge to gag. When I’d found him in the annex, I hadn’t expected to find him in that state. I hadn’t really known what to expect—everything was so out of control, and now, Mom was here wanting to talk like everything was normal. Like the guy I was prepared to risk it all for wasn’t locked in that room, hurting and alone.

“What is it, baby?”

I blinked at her, blocking out the memory. “What? Oh, nothing. Just that pesky car-lag I was telling you about.” I replaced the uneaten cookie with the mug of cocoa and sipped at the steaming liquid.

“You know, I came up here last night to check on you, but you didn’t answer.”

“I was showering.” The lie rolled off my tongue easily, but Mom hesitated, clearly unsatisfied with my answer. Her eyes glanced over to the window, and she sighed. “Cara, if something is going on, you can tell me. You do know that, right?”

I spotted my tattered sneakers sitting to the side of the window and prayed she hadn’t spotted them. “Going on, with what?” I blinked refocusing on her face. “I already told you I’m just tired.”

“So stubborn,” she murmured under her breath. “Just like your father.”

“I am nothing like my father,” I spat out a little too hastily, immediately regretting the anger in my voice.

“I’ll leave you alone, baby. Try and get some sleep.” She rose from the bed and moved to the door. With her hand on the handle, she glanced back at the last second. “You know, Cara, things always have a way of working themselves out. Whatever it is, it’ll seem better with time.”

I gulped back the tears threatening to burst out at any second. How could she possibly know that? For all I knew, Braiden could be dead by morning. And I would have lost not only the guy I was pretty sure I was in love with, but my family too. Because if anything happened to him, I would never be able to forgive my father.

Ever.

~

M
orning didn’t bring me any reassurances. I moved on autopilot, only going through the motions. Braiden had sent me away, refusing to let me help him and unwilling to hear my pleas. And he was still locked in there, beaten and bloody, and what was I doing?

I was eating breakfast with my family pretending like everything was fine.

I didn’t deserve him. I should have stood my ground and demanded that my father release the man I’d fallen in love with. Beg for his life. Sacrifice my own happiness for his freedom—because once my father did discover the truth, I would never be allowed out of his sight again. The fact that I was legally an adult meant nothing. I was Frankie O’Connor’s only daughter, and I would be kept prisoner under a lock and key until my father felt it safe—and appropriate—for me to come out.

“Pass me the orange juice please, Cara.” My father forced a smile, and I wondered if Mom had told him about my fragile state. Being the dutiful daughter, I handed him the jug of fresh juice and continued picking at my breakfast.

“Is something wrong with your pancakes?” Jason’s voice caught me off guard. I had foolishly hoped he would give me some space after dinner last night, but from the smug look on his face, he planned on the total opposite. He might as well have been wearing a massive sign that said ‘I beat the shit out of your boyfriend.’ Except Braiden wasn’t my boyfriend ... he wasn’t my anything anymore. He didn’t want anything to do with me.

And who could blame him.

Look what my family had done to him. Yes, he might have hurt some kid when he was in college. Yes, he might have been involved with a lot of bad things back then. But did that really warrant a death sentence?

My downcast eyes flickered over to where my father sat. Frankie O’Connor—one of the most influential, respected, and feared men in all of Seattle—wanted Braiden dead. But why? What had he done that was so awful it justified taking his life?

A shiver worked its way through my body. I had to find a way to help Braiden.

There had to be a way.

Because I wasn’t sure I’d survive if he didn’t.

~

A
fter breakfast, I took off for a jog around the estate again. Mom insisted on joining me, and although I couldn’t stand to be under her surveillance, I didn’t argue. It was a better alternative to Jason.

“Cara, slow down. I’m not as young and fit as my
twenty
-year-old daughter.” She laughed breathlessly, and I slowed my pace to a leisurely jog. “What’s the hurry? If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were running from something.”

I stopped and bent forward onto my knees, drawing in long breaths. Once my heart rate had returned to normal, I lifted my head and met my mom’s concerned eyes. “What, Mom?” I huffed out fed up with feeling like a puzzle she wanted to solve.

“Cara, you sound so broken. What is it, baby?”

“Mom, really?!” I threw up my hands and started pacing. She knew. I’d known it since I arrived. Maybe she didn’t know exactly what had gone down, but she knew it concerned Jason, Braiden, and me. I had no doubt she knew Braiden was locked up in the annex. Mom made it her business to know. “I know you know something, so you might as well just spit it out.”

“Sweetie, come here.” She extended her hands and coaxed me into her arms. I fell against her chest and sobbed into her velour zip-up hoodie. “Shh, there, everything will be okay, baby. Shh.”

Her words did little to appease the pain slicing through my chest. How could anything be okay given the circumstances?

“Cara.” Her voice softened, and she held me at arm’s length, brushing my damp hair out of my face, the way she had when I was a child. “It’s him, isn’t it? Braiden Donohue. Something’s happened?”

I nodded, unable to talk through the barrage of emotions overwhelming me.

“Oh, baby. My sweet baby.” She cradled me against her chest again, whispering soothing sentiments into my ear, and I let myself soak up her comfort. So much had happened in such a short span of time; I didn’t even know who I was anymore. It was like ever since Braiden walked into Lincoln Park Stadium, my life—and everything I valued—was tipped on its head. I’d never met someone who irritated me the way he did, pushed me and tested me, or made me want to break free from the responsibilities and expectations of my family name. But he did. We were a modern day Romeo and Juliet—star-crossed lovers, destined to never experience a life together.

“They’re hurting him. He’s in there all alone, hurting, because of his name. Because of our name.” A fresh wave of pain washed over me, and I buried my head further into Mom.

“Cara, this is not your fault. It’s bigger than both of you; you just got caught up in the middle of it.” She untangled me from her again and tilted my chin up to force me to look at her. “You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”

“Ho- how do you know these things?”

“I’m your mother. It’s my job. I saw it the second you walked into the house. Okay, I didn’t know he was the guy who was causing your pain, but it didn’t take much to piece it together.” She studied me for a second, and her lips pulled up in a sad smile. “I saw you go out there.”

“Oh,” I croaked. I had been terrified of her discovering my secret, but I felt like a burden had been lifted. Even if she outed me to my father—which I assumed she would—I was glad it was out in the open. I didn’t want to hide my feelings for Braiden, even if he had given up on me. Our short-lived tryst deserved more than that.

“What if they-” I couldn’t say the words. It didn’t feel real. That I’d fallen for a guy who might not survive today ... or the next. “He told me we were done. I know it’s the way it has to be, but-”

“Shh, baby. Come on, let’s get you back to the house and get you cleaned up. The men had to go into the city this morning.”
They did?
“I need to talk to your father. Just promise me you won’t go back out there. Not until I talk to him.”

She was talking in riddles, but exhaustion had set in and I didn’t have the energy to fight her on the matter. Besides, Braiden didn’t want me there. Mom wrapped her arm around my waist and started leading me out of the woods and back toward the house, but I had checked out. I was still in that darkened room with Braiden and the three words that had hurt me more than anything.

We. Are. Done.