Resisting Fate (Predetermined) (28 page)

I flipped the ends. It hung to my chin now. I’d decided to cut it, because I needed to remind myself that I was alive still – that I still held control over the little things in my life. My mom hated it though. Her exact words had been
Jesus, Emerly; you look like your dad did in the late eighties.

“Thanks,” I gave him a flippant smile, before sitting down in my chair. I went back to devouring my ice cream.

He cleared his throat. I stiffened, the spoon hung at my lips as I waited for him to say something. Nothing ever came. So it was my turn to play fifty questions.

“So have you talked to—”

“So there’s this formal thing—”

Our duel interruption was all sorts of awkward. I dropped my spoon into the container, and he chuckled from behind. I relaxed, just slightly, at the sound. He almost sounded like the old Zachary there for a second. The Zachary I’d never again get back.

“You go ahead, Em, I’m all ears. I’ve missed the sound of your voice in person anyway. The phone calls we made were always so fuzzy.” I sighed and shook my head. Damn him and his inconvenient nice words. One second I wanted him gone, but then he’d go and say sweet stuff like that, messing with my head.

I cleared my throat, “I was uh, wondering if you or your family had heard anything from Jack and Adrian since they left. Your mom mentioned what was going on, but I thought–”

“You thought I’d know more.” It was a rude interrupting statement, not a question that he spoke. His jaw clenched as he stared down at me. He moved closer, until he sat with the chair faced backwards, and his arms over the top. It was amazing how cold and distant he could turn with the one quick mention his cousin.

“I’m sorry, Zachary, I didn’t mean to…”

I lifted my hand, as if to touch him, but pulled it away at the last minute. I couldn’t give him the wrong impression. He needed to know I wasn’t in the market for a boyfriend right now.

“You don’t have to apologize to me, Red. You can’t help it – he was the bastard that couldn’t keep his shit together long enough for me to get back and claim you as my own.”

And then I saw red. I leaned forward. Oh no, he
so
was not going there. “Hey, it was a question. You don’t want to answer it, then don’t.” I snapped. Just because he so obviously had jealous issues, didn’t give him the reason to go off on me. It wasn’t like it was my fault that Jack and I were fated. “And hey, seriously, don’t blame it all on him. I was there too. I
let
it happen!” I jutted my chin out, and he shook his head, before throwing it back with a groan.

“Listen, it was all that warlock shit he was capable of, I know it. He put you under a spell. That’s how he got you to—”

I slapped my hand down on the table, and leaned forward, shaking my head, “Wait-wait-wait…warlock shit? What the hell do you mean by that? Jack’s not a warlock.” No, no way. That wasn’t even a remote possibility. Then I remembered what he said, that day at the cliff…
I’m a freak, an anomaly…
I shook the thoughts from my head, easing back down in my chair. I was
so
not going to let anymore supernatural prospects and ideas invade my brain today. There wasn’t enough room in there for anymore. “No, dammit,” I swore, slicing the air with my hand, “scratch that. I don’t want to know. I’m done with the lies and if I don’t know anything else, then it won’t hurt me.”

I dropped my hands onto my lap, clawing at my pants with my nails, hanging on for dear life. If I moved them, they’d be across his cheek like Kelsey’s had been. “Besides, Jack didn’t do anything but protect me from my step-douche. Something
you
know nothing about, by the way.”

Zachary
paled,
his body tensing at my fighting words. I knew it wasn’t his fault and all, and I knew he did what he could. Besides, it wasn’t his battle to fight. It was mine, it had always been mine.

 “That’s not fair, Emmy. You know I would’ve been there if I could’ve helped it!” He stood, moving next to me, only to lean down by my legs.

I cringed as he leaned forward to grab my hand in his. Sorrow filled his eyes as he stared up at me. “Emmy, I love you. I’ve
always
loved you. I knew you were meant to be mine when I first noticed you at school two years ago.

I sucked in my cheeks and bit down, fighting the urge to tell him that he wasn’t first. Jack was first. And according to
Jack
, he’d been in love with me since our freshmen year.

“Dammit!” I groaned, slipping my hand out of his fist. I stood and hauled my ice cream and empty spoons to the sink. I dropped them, letting the silverware crash to the bottom.

“What?” Zachary growled in response. Once again, my response wasn’t likely what he’d expected.

 “Nothing, Zachary, I’m sorry. I have a lot on my mind right now.” Like how in the hell I was going to get rid of the pain in my chest maybe?

He nodded tensely, but he didn’t press the issue. “Just so you know…he’s not coming back. He called my mom last night, told her that things were going a little worse than they had hoped. Apparently the witch and warlock council found out through the elders about Adrian’s betrayal, and they’re not willing to help with the whole
getting his powers back
thing.” I pressed my palms against the sink, fighting my urge to tell him to shut his pie hole. “Serves him right, you know… I almost died that night…”

I jerked my head back to stare at him. I was a tad bit confused here…because wasn’t I there too? Wasn’t I tortured, burned, and kidnapped as well that day? Hey, enough about me, right? Apparently I didn’t count and was by far
not
the injured party here… Besides, the only thing he’d said that really mattered to me anyways was the fact that Jack wasn’t coming back. Now if that wasn’t an internal kick to the gut, then I don’t know what would have been.

He grinned, apparently all happy-camperish now again. “Anyways, now that I know that you and I are going to be okay, then things can get back to normal between us again.” He motioned his hand from him to me, and back again. I watched, unable to look him in the eyes.
We
were
not
okay in the sense he was thinking. I opened my mouth, to finally tell him that, but he beat me to it. “I kind of have something I’ve been meaning to ask you for a while now…”

I nodded, his wolfy grin was in full force, and for the first time, I fully regretted my choice to walk away from Jack completely, even with his happiness full on thrown at me.

There again, Jack had walked away too… “What’s that Zachary?”

A tight smile pulled across my lips as he yanked me into his side. My legs shook as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders. Then he tried to nuzzle my neck and the pain he’d instigated in my chest from his move took control and I instantly maneuvered out of his hold. This time though, he didn’t seem to notice I was doing it on purpose. I was getting pretty smooth in that sense at least.

It was about damn time…

“Well now that I’m back, I’ll be able to take
you
 to that senior winter formal next month. Isn’t that awesome?”

I nodded, not so almighty high anymore. Dread pooled up in my stomach at his excitement. I frowned.

“Come on, Em,” he sighed, coming closer to tug at the end of my short locks. “We’ve been talking about going since we first started dating two years ago! You could at least give me a little more encouragement than that…” he teased, nudging my chin up with his thumb and forefinger. I stared blankly into his eyes, hoping I could will him to change his mind. Still, he never faulted, never wavered from my stare. His excitement wasn’t going to go away anytime soon apparently.

“Yeah great, I’m excited. It should be a blast.” I gave a mock fist pump with my hand, but it’s a wonder he hadn’t noticed the sarcasm I exuded.

I don’t know why I agreed to go with him. Maybe it was the fact that I was desperately still trying to hold on to the Zachary that I once knew–the Zachary who would carry my books to class–the Zachary who could make me feel like the most important person in the world. The Zachary who had the ability to make my heart skip a few beats when he simply kissed me or held my hand.

“You can’t take Kelsey, it’d be too weird. She’s too…whacked out.”

I blinked, “Um, excuse me? She’s my best friend Zachary, of course she can go.”

He frowned, and spoke as his teeth gritted together. “She’s also skanky. Did you know she wanted to have a threesome? That Jonas guy she used to date told a bunch of people that.” My jaw clenched tight. Threesome my butt…

Shit–I knew he and Kelsey had bad blood and all, but he’s really crossed a line this time. Maybe this was the guy that Kelsey had hated all along, and I was just now seeing it.

“Listen, Zachary,” I snapped, stepping back away from him again with my hands held out in front of my body, “I’m tired. I think you need to leave now.”

“Really Red? It’s going to go down like that?” He shook his head and ran a hand through his long hair before slapping them down onto his legs, “Look, I’m sorry if I said something wrong, but I think it’s time that you found some new friends who—”

I pressed my palm out. Hell to the freaking no. He was not going to go there. How
dare
 he think that I’d find a new damn best friend because of some supposed
rumor
he heard from some ridiculous source along the way?

“My mom’s coming home, and I’m supposed to be grounded for my tardy issues and school skipping, so I think you should go. Now.” I growled, like I was ready to smack him once again. I stalked forward, grabbed the door and motioned him out of my house.

“Fine, whatever Emmy, but this isn’t done.” He scooted forward, leaning down to try to kiss me. I pulled away, and stared out the door instead of facing him. I was seeing fire, and if he didn’t get the hell out of my room, then I was going to burn him with my invisible, make believe flames.

I was beyond done with him now…

Chapter Nineteen

“He’s coming for you Emmy, you have to be ready.” Jack’s hands were tight on my upper arms, shaking me, scaring the piss outta me as the dark outlined trees blew fiercely around us. Behind him was the cliff–our cliff. And a sense of happiness almost took over my insides as I thought about the memory we shared there. As soon as his hands clenched tighter onto my shoulders, I knew that this was no time for a good old fashioned, reminiscing moment.

I’d seen many sides of this guy standing before me, but this terrified and utterly panicked version was something new and entirely, dare I say, terrifying? Was that the right word for the fearful look in the blue eyes I’d grown so in love with?

“Who, Jack? Who’s coming? My stepdad? Adrian? Who? Tell me!” I gripped his waist, squeezing tightly with my fingers, wanting nothing more than to bury my face against his chest.

He stood still, unmoving as he spoke, “Things are changing, Em. Things you won’t understand. Things you need to be prepared for.”

“Well, aren’t you the cryptic, bearer of bad news guy tonight?” I shook my head, this was literally, a dream, not a future dream, a good old fashioned a happy-go-lucky dream. “Jesus, Jack. You worry too much. Can’t you take me in your arms and kiss me like a dying man? Now that’s a dream I could look forward to…” His eyes narrowed at my teasing words, but his grip did tighten. And then he obeyed my command, none too soon, finally pulling me close to him like I had only hoped he would.

I sighed into his warmth, and I felt his chest rattle as he laughed. My ache, my burn, it was gone.

“I have missed you more than you could ever know.” He lifted his hand and pushed me back slightly, staring down at me. His gaze did the unmentionable to my heart. I was a goner, and I wanted him…for forever…and then some.

He ran one tingling finger down my cheek, only to land on my mouth. He traced my lips, and my face was on fire as he studied my mouth with his blue orbs. Damn…fate really knew what the hell it was doing when it gave me this boy. No longer could I resist him.

“Jack, I need you. I don’t know what to do!” I whispered. Soft paranoia lined my voice as I spoke. “I never should have pushed you away. I don’t care what your dad did…I don’t care what your brother did either. Nor do I care that you’re a wolf and a warlock with healing powers, all mixed up into one. I love you. Please come back to me!”

His sad eyes studied me, like I was going to disappear from him for good. Like he had to engrain me in his mind, like I did him. Then without a warning, he pulled, shaking his head as he pace back in forth over the hard, leaf covered ground. I thought my confession would have been what he wanted to hear. He told me that he loved me before he left, how could he change his mind so quickly?

“Jack?” I inched forward, reaching for his arm.

He tensed, but didn’t pull away, “I’ve gotta go, Em. Just remember what I said. Things are changing. You need to be ready.”

“No! You can’t leave me. Everyone I love leaves me, Jack! Please, I’m begging you!”

He whipped me around, to face him full on, pulling me so close, that his heartbeat thumped against my chest, “Ah, Strawberry, I love you too, but I’ve gotta go now, my being here is too risky for you. I promise you, I will find you again, love. Soon. Very, very soon…”

“Sissy? Are you okay?” I sat up with a loud gasp, tears dripping down my cheeks as Jamie’s face came into my view. I blinked, trying to stop them as I stared blankly at his frightened face

“I’m okay buddy, I promise,” I nodded, patting my bed, encouraging him to join me. That dream – it was far from bad.

I ran my fingertips across my lips, as I stared out the window of my room, remembering the way Jack’s finger had done the same, exact thing. I shook my head, returning to reality as Jamie’s whimper, caught my attention. “Hey, Buddy, I promise, I’m really okay! What’s wrong?” I glanced towards my bedside table, eyes bugging out when I realize that it was only seven at night.

Crap, I didn’t mean to nap. Well, at least not
this
long at least, but like always, I couldn’t seem to control it anymore. It’s…weird. In fact, the last thing I remembered was being wide awake, sitting at my computer. How I ended up in my bed was a mystery beyond me.

“I wanna eat something, but there’s a man in the kitchen with Mama, and I don’t know him.” I jerked my head back. Surprise registered on my face as I studied my brother’s big, watery eyes.

A man in the kitchen…with my mother…now who in the hell would that be?

Jamie bit down on his bottom lip, as his seemingly nervous eyes searched my own for something – comfort, reassurance maybe? Poor guy – no four-year-old kid should have to live in fear like he did. I sat up, hanging one leg over the side of my bed as I scooped the little man onto my lap. He snuggled in close, with his newer, much smaller cast tucked close to my stomach.

“Well, it’s probably a friend of Mommy’s. Don’t worry, little man.” I smiled down at him and he nodded, but didn’t break eye contact with me. I narrowed my brows, “Something else buggin’ ya, Jay?” I ran my fingers through his curls and he shrugged slightly, pulling his blanket closer to his chin. He leaned back even more to stare up at me. He looked so cute, so damn affectionate, that I couldn’t help but smother the little guy with forehead kisses, and a few ticklish fingers to his ribs.

He giggled, relaxing a bit before finally speaking again. “The man, he kissed mama on the cheek, and she started smiling. I don’t see her smile with Daddy like that. She usually cries with him.” My smile wavered, as I rubbed his back. He glanced over towards the door before looking back at me once more. He fingered the silky part of his blanket, as his frightened looking eyes begin to water again. “He was the man from my last dream, Emmy.”

I stiffened, remembering exactly how close one of his dreams was to my real life experience with Adrian. That was a coincidence, right? A weird and completely, scary coincidence…had to be. He wasn’t like me. I inherited the dreaming gene from my father. My mother was
a nobody
– and the step-douche was as far from super natural as a dude could get. The weird thought continued to plague me as I watched his bottom lip quiver.

I sighed, pulling him in for another giant sized hug, before lifting him to stand in front of me, next to my bed. He looked so sweet, so innocent, so untouched from all the crap of the world. I wanted nothing more than to shelter his little heart away from all the badness he was inevitably going to face one day. “I’ll tell you what, Jay man,” I stated, throwing his blanket over his shoulders like a superman cape, only to tie it in a loose not under his chin, “I’m going to get some jammies on, and then I’ll head downstairs to see who this man is. Then, we’ll pop popcorn or something yummy like that, maybe even watch one of those new movies you got from Grandma and Grandpa. Whaddya say?”

He responded with a toothy smile, nodding at me excitedly before taking off towards the hallway. I smiled as the sound of his stocking feet pounded the floor in abuse behind him. I cringed too, praying that he didn’t slip and hurt himself again. Sighing to myself, I threw on some new pajama bottoms and a fleece sweatshirt, wishing that the cool fall night would freeze away all the worries and doubts pouring through my head.

 I heard the sound of laughter as I approached the top of the stairs to head down towards the kitchen. First it was a feminine laugh, soft and sweet. I could only assume that the noise belonged to an alien who had invaded my mother’s body. Then I heard the sound of Jamie, squealing at the top of his lungs, as if he was either dying, or laughing. Panicked it was the first option, I ran at top speed down the hall and stairs, thankful that my legs still had the speed they needed to get me there.

“Jamie?” I called out in fear, finally approaching the kitchen doorway. My hand encircled the fireplace poker that I picked up along the way, in case the situation really was as crappy as my heart seemed to think it was.

“We’re in here, Emmy!” My mom’s cheerful voice called from the family room on the other side of our kitchen. I exhaled a sigh of relief as I slowed my roll, and headed towards the sound of her call.

“So I told them that I wasn’t in town for a visit, and they gave me your address. I hope you don’t mind my showing up like this.”

The deep voice caught me off guard and I stiffened at the entryway of the living room. I pressed my hands against the doorframe and blinked, not believing the truth that my vision was so obviously trying to show me. There was not a strange, red headed man sitting in my house with my mother and my baby brother. Maybe if I kept chanting that, then I’d wake up from another dream and life would be back to normal. Er, well, as close to normal as I could ever get…

I cleared my throat, “Hey, mom, Jamie said that…” I stopped, swallowing a sudden lump that seemed to be lodging itself in my throat. The man before me, he looked so…familiar.

“Honey, I’m so glad you finally woke up.” My mom practically skipped to me, her arms outstretched as if she was actually reaching for a hug. I winced, pulling away and she frowned at me in response. No un-normal, mom hugs were allowed tonight.

The red haired man stood too, holding one hundred percent of my gaze, sucking me into a tunnel of worry, fear, and confusion as his smile turned from sweet to conniving in two seconds. I didn’t like the guy already…

He eyed me from head to toe and I shivered, pulling my arms across my chest. “Christ, Bev, she looks like him!” I shook my head and knitted my brows. Who in the hell was this prick comparing me to? And why did he seem to know me? Better yet, why did my mother look as though she’d never been happier?

“Oh, I know. It’s that hair–it’s atrocious now that she’s cut it. At least she’s got my beauty with the eyes.” I snapped my head to the left, glaring hard at the sudden fashion police of a mother standing next to me.

Disgusted with her, I moved to stand by my brother, wrapping my arm around his shoulders as rude and careless words spilled from my unfiltered mouth. “Who in the hell are you? And what are you doing in my house?”

“Emerly Grace O’Connell! How dare you–”

“She’s fine, Beverly. She has every reason to be concerned.” His lip curled on one side, “…trust me.” The prick-alcious nodded at me, a knowing gleam took hold in his bright, blue eyes.

I snarled, pulling Jamie closer to my leg. There was no way in hell that I wanted this guy to see fear in me. He’d probably feed off of it if he did–maybe use it to his sick advantage in the end. Internally, I shuddered at the thought, but externally kept my body and face, stoic.

Things are changing Em. Things you won’t understand. Things you need to be prepared for.
M
y dream! I pressed a shaky hand to my throat. Was this what Jack was trying to warn me about? Was he warning about this stranger? This stranger who looked like my…fath…er? Well shit – how did I not see the resemblance until now?

“Look,” he chuckled, “she recognizes me, Bev. You can see it in her eyes.” I glanced over at my mom, noting how happy and pleased she looked. Her hands were pressed against her cheek as she studied me. Jamie must have sensed something, because he only gripped my leg tighter.

I whispered, “You’re my uncle.”

His grin grew wider as he stepped in front of me. He pushed out his arms, reaching for me, only to pull me into a crushing hug. I released my brother, giving him a little push, non-verbally telling him to get away from me. This guy would never get near my brother again.

A wicked, soft voice was at my ear. Hot and annoying breath blew across my cheek, “Y
ou’re weak, like your father.
” His fingers dug into my back, I winced through my teeth, suddenly too fixed in place, to speak. I’d been in this position before–with Adrian. The uncle…was a stupid shit-tard warlock.

His fingers had to have been drawing blood, but I bit my lip to hide my cries, ”
Shh… If you know what’s good for you then you’ll keep your trap shut!
”

He backed away from me, a fake smile plastered on his face again. Then he turned to my brother, with a similar sadistic grin that he held towards me, cocking his face to the side. I stumbled towards Jamie, pulling him behind me. I had to protect him…well, at least I had to try…