Savage Autumn (30 page)

“Oh, Richard, my heart just goes out to them. They have suffered so much, and I took a liking to them right away. Joanna seems such a lady with her soft-spoken ways, and she is so pretty. It’s a crying shame that one so young has lost her sight.”

“What about the boy?”

“You should see him, Richard. He’s such a little gentleman, and to see the way he takes care of Joanna. I declare it just about melts my heart.”

“Everything melts your heart, Kate.”

“I don’t have time to stand here talking to you. I need to get back to our guests. It is going to be such fun having young people around the place.”

The atmosphere in Kate’s kitchen was festive. Tag and Joanna sat at the table helping Kate make candy and sweetmeats.

Tag smeared butter over Joanna’s palms and handed her some taffy which Kate had just poured from a pan.

“Have a care, Joanna. It’s hot,” Kate warned her.

Joanna nimbly shifted the candy from one hand to the other. “This is such fun, Kate. I was never allowed to help in the kitchen at home,” Joanna said, smiling.

Kate dried her hands on her apron. “How can that be? Didn’t your mother prepare you for one day looking after your own home?”

“No…I…she didn’t.”

Tag laughed aloud. “I think my sister is embarrassed, Kate. What she is hesitating to tell you is that we always had servants to look after the house and kitchen.”

Kate clicked her tongue. “Nevertheless, you should at least have been allowed to cook.”

“Kate, although I cannot see, I can imagine what your kitchen looks like,” Joanna said, pulling at the taffy now that it had cooled.

Kate had been stirring the batter of a cake and she paused. “Tell me how you picture this room. I’d be interested to know.”

“Well, I think that the floors are of polished wood, because they are slick after you have just mopped them.”

“What color wood?” Tag asked.

“Dark. Let’s see…Kate, you have a sunshiny personality
so I would associate you with bright cheerful colors. The curtains at the window are yellow. The tablecloth is white trimmed in yellow. Am I right so far?”

“Not too bad,” Kate said, pouring the cake batter into a pan and placing it into the oven. “The curtains are yellow and white checked; the floor is dark wood, but you were wrong about the tablecloth; it’s yellow with white trim.”

“Joanna, how did you figure all that out?” Tag asked in amazement.

“I don’t know. It’s like I once told you. Being blind has sharpened all my other senses.”

By now the taffy had hardened and Tag cut it into small pieces and placed them in a jar which Kate handed him.

“Why are we making all these desserts, Kate?” Tag asked, popping a piece of taffy into his mouth.

“Didn’t I tell you? The young officers and a few young ladies are going on a sleigh ride. All the women are contributing to the food.”

“That sounds like such fun,” Joanna said wistfully.

“Of course it will be,” Kate said, looking down at Joanna’s bandaged eyes. “You can tell me if you had a good time after you return.”

“What…I can’t go. How could I?”

“I don’t want to hear any excuses, Joanna. Harland came by late yesterday morning to ask if you would go with him, and I accepted for you.”

“I had no idea. Why didn’t you tell me?”

Kate winked at Tag. “Because, I didn’t want to give you time to think about it, so you could come up with some excuse to say no.”

Joanna stood up. “Should I not be getting dressed?”

Kate could hear the enthusiasm in Joanna’s voice. She thought the sleigh ride would do her good, and Harland was such a nice young man.

“Come along, dear,” Kate said, taking Joanna’s arm. “I’ll help you select what you should wear.”

Joanna placed her hands into the warm fur muff Kate had loaned her. She could hear the tinkling of the bells as the sleigh glided over the snowpacked roads. Joanna, Captain Thatcher, and another couple were riding in the lead sleigh, while three other couples occupied a second one.

Harland stared at Joanna and felt a warmth spread throughout his body. He knew his feelings for her were becoming deeper. Since the first day he had seen her, he had been overwhelmed by her beauty. Now that he had come to know Joanna, he admired her courage.

She was so fragile and delicate looking and yet she had endured more hardships than any other girl he had ever known. He wished it were within his power to wipe out all the hurt she had been through.

He had been aware since the wagon train that Claudia didn’t like Joanna. That was the reason he had excluded Claudia from today’s activities. He wanted Joanna to be happy with nothing and no one to mar her joy.

Seeing a soft white snow-flake float down to land on Joanna’s lip, he reached over and touched it.

She smiled. “Has it started to snow again, Captain?”

“Yes, but not hard. Just a few scattered flakes here and there.”

“Tell me what the countryside looks like.”

He gazed across the flat desolate prairie which had no trees or foliage. “Well, picture if you will, a world of whiteness that stretches as far as the eye can see. Add to that a gray overcast day and you have summed it all up.”

“You have no romance in your soul, Captain,” Joanna said laughingly.

His eyes rested on her lips and when he realized Lieutenant Carson was watching him, he looked quickly away.

Lieutenant Carson laughed. “I don’t think you would say that about our good Captain here, Miss James, if you could see the look on his face.”

Becky Miller stifled a giggle as Captain Thatcher gave her and Lieutenant Carson a scalding glance which quickly silenced them.

Joanna was totally unaware that the other three were watching her so closely. The group was silent until they turned off the road. They reached the designated place where they were to build a huge bonfire.

Harland carefully helped Joanna out of the sleigh and led her over to a fallen log. Dusting the powdery snow off, he placed a blanket over the rough bark and helped Joanna to sit down.

“You stay right here, Joanna, while I will help get the fire going. I will return shortly,” he told her. “Will you be all right?”

“Of course,” she replied.

Joanna could hear the others talking and laughing, and she began to withdraw into herself. Even when she was with a crowd, she felt lonely. She didn’t really belong here. Would she ever get over this lost feeling? Where do I belong? she asked herself. ‘You know where you belong,’ the voice inside her head answered.

She wondered what Windhawk was doing now. Did he ever think of her? Had he forgotten her and taken one of the many maidens, who adored him, as his wife?

“What were you thinking just now, Miss James?” Captain Thatcher asked, sitting down beside her.

Joanna had been so deep in thought she had not heard him return. “I was just remembering someone in my past, Captain.”

“Were you perchance thinking about some young man you once knew?”

“Yes…yes I was,” she answered, not bothering to elaborate. “The fire feels nice,” she said, changing the subject.

“They are now laying out the food. It looks like we are to have a feast,” Harland said. “Are you hungry?”

“Yes, I’m starved. The one thing I missed when I was…in the Blackfoot village was a variety in my diet.”
“Are you saying that their diet is very much the same each day?”

“Yes, but it’s not as bad as it sounds. The women are very good cooks and make some very delicious meals.”

“I haven’t asked before, and you can tell me to mind my own business if you want to, but were you mistreated by the Indians?”

“No, quite the contrary. At first some of the women didn’t accept me, but later on I became very close to them. I miss…some of them dreadfully.”

“You never did say how you lost your vision.”

“It was because of snow-blindness. You see, the Indians have dark eyes and are not as susceptible to the sun’s rays as you and I would be; therefore, Windhawk didn’t realize that I was being affected by the sun.”

Harland could tell she didn’t want to talk about her experience with the Indians. Even though he wanted to know more about Joanna’s ordeal, and especially about the Blackfoot chief, Windhawk, he decided to change the subject.

“Simon tells me that he and his wife came to this country with your family from England. Had he been in your family’s service very long?”

“Yes, he was with my mother and father long before I was born.”

“He seems a good man. I have been talking to him about seeking out my family if he should need employment. He seems to think he needs to stay with you and your brother though.”

“I wouldn’t like him to feel bound to me and Tag. I will speak to him and see if he would like to return to Philadelphia.”

“Farley is a real character, isn’t he?” Harland asked. “It seems he has adopted you and your brother.”

“I am very fond of him. I suppose he has become the grandfather Tag and I never had,” Joanna said, laughing.

It was hard to think of the crusty old trapper being close to someone with Joanna’s breeding, but she had a way of making
everyone feel they were important to her. She seemed much older than her young years indicated. Harland could feel there was a sadness about her. He could attribute much of her unhappiness to the fact that she had lost both her mother and father in such a short space of time. He felt, however, it went much deeper than that.

Soon the food was served and all the young people gathered around in a circle. Joanna was enjoying the stories they told and the songs they sang. She joined in and soon began to feel happiness for the first time in many weeks. She raised her voice in song. Perhaps it wouldn’t be such a difficult transition from Windhawk’s world back to hers. With friends like Captain Thatcher and Kate, perhaps she could find her way back. For Tag’s sake, she had to look to the future. For her own sake, she had to bury the past.

On the ride back to the fort, the happy group continued to raise their voices in song. The snow was now falling heavily and everyone was in a festive mood. Joanna was glad Kate had insisted on her going on the sleigh ride; she had enjoyed herself immensely.

When the sleigh pulled up in front of Colonel Jackson’s house, Harland leaped down and swung Joanna to the ground.

“I had such a wonderful time, Captain Thatcher. Thank you for inviting me.”

He was tempted to raise her hand to his lips, but he knew the others were watching. “It was my pleasure, Miss James. I hope you will allow me to call on you in the near future. There are many gaieties here at the fort and I would like to be the one to introduce them to you.”

She smiled but said nothing. He helped her up the steps and opened the door for her. “Until next time, Miss James,” he said.

Joanna smiled again and Harland watched her until she disappeared through the door. He had hope in his heart that one day soon, she would be willing to listen to the plans he had for their future together.

When he got back in the sleigh, Lieutenant Carson grinned at him. “Now there’s a girl that I could learn to like in a hurry.
I believe she is the prettiest girl I have seen in a long time. It’s not hard to see that you are smitten with her, Harland.”

Harland leaned back and studied his friend’s face. “She is off-limits to you, soldier. That’s the girl I’m going to marry!”

Joanna sat beside Kate on the sofa telling her all about the sleigh ride. Kate watched her as she talked, knowing she was not as happy as she pretended to be. When Joanna began to trust her more, Kate wanted to talk to her. She felt that Joanna was keeping something very disturbing to herself and Kate thought it might help if she could confide in someone. She feared Joanna had been badly mistreated by the Indians, and she wanted to convince her to put that part of her life behind her.

Kate had never been one to pry, and she very rarely interfered in other people’s affairs. She was a rare person, who really cared about others and wanted to help them.

Kate was beginning to love Joanna and Tag and wanted to see them happy. She knew the time would come when they would have to leave her. When that time came, she wanted them to be armed with strength and self-confidence.

That night Joanna went to bed early. In her darkened world, there was neither peace nor serenity. Today, for a short space of time, she had allowed herself to forget about Windhawk. As each day passed, would she think about him less and less? she wondered.

There was a knock on the door and Tag entered her room. “Are you asleep, Joanna?” he asked.

She patted the bed beside her. “No, I’m not sleepy. Sit with me for a while, Tag.”

He plopped down on the bed beside her. “Kate said that you had fun today.”

“Yes, it was nice.”

“I’m glad,” he said in a quiet voice. Joanna could tell that something was bothering him. She knew him too well not to recognize when he was troubled.

“Would you care to tell me what is on your mind, little brother?”
He stretched out on the foot of her bed and she could almost feel the frown on his face. “I was just wondering if you are fond of Captain Thatcher?”

Joanna smiled to herself. She knew exactly what was bothering him now. “I like him very much. He has been very kind to you and me, and we both need kindness in our lives at the moment.”

“Kate and Colonel Jackson are kind,” he reminded her.

“Yes, they are, Tag. I believe you and I have been very fortunate. It seems everywhere we go we find a friend.”

“I overheard Captain Thatcher ask if he could call on you again.”

“Yes, he did.”

There was silence for a moment and Joanna waited for the question she knew would be forthcoming.

“Do you like Captain Thatcher better than Windhawk?”

She sat up and reached out her hand and he placed his hand in hers. “Tag, the way I feel about Captain Thatcher and the way I feel about Windhawk are entirely different.”

“Windhawk is your husband,” he reminded her. “A wife shouldn’t forget about her husband.”

“Yes, that’s true. I love Windhawk and I like Captain Thatcher. Does that answer your question?”

“You wouldn’t up and marry the captain, would you?”

She laughed and pulled him to her. “No, silly, you don’t marry a friend.”

“Are you sure?”

She ruffled his hair. “What’s the matter, don’t you like Captain Thatcher?”

“I like him all right. He’s nice. I think he makes a very good officer.”

Joanna could hear the question in his voice. “But?” she asked.

“He isn’t Windhawk. After you, I love Windhawk better than anyone in the world.”

Joanna became serious for a moment. Tag had lost so many people he cared about in his short life. She didn’t want him to think Windhawk didn’t care for him.
“Tag, what occurred between Windhawk and me had nothing to do with you. I happen to know that Windhawk thought a great deal of you.”