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Authors: Janey Rosen

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BOOK: Sebastian - Dark Bonds
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“Would you like me to drive back?   I can be there by early evening.”  I’m touched by Sebastian’s thoughtfulness and support.

“No, darling.  Go to your meeting.  I’m fine, honestly.  It’s just so good to hear your voice.”

“Yours too.  Have you eaten?” he asks, concern in his voice.

“No I can’t eat, my stomach is in knots.”

“You must eat,” he scolds.

“Yes, Sebastian.  I will eat.  I miss you.”

“I miss you too.  Let me know what the arrangements are for the funerals.  I’ll be there – or not – whatever you think appropriate,” he says.

“Will do.  I love you,” I blow a kiss down the phone to him.

“Go and eat,” he
says again, as he cuts the call.

 

 

 

5

It was a beautiful and moving service.  I could not speak about Joe or Alan to the congregation as I was too emotional, but Nathan, Ruth and Mike all said a lovely piece about their lives and there was not a dry eye in the church.  Now stood beside my son’s little grave, I’m throwing a yellow rose down on to Joe’s small coffin, and I smile ruefully at the bright red color of the wood and the Manchester United football club emblem painted on the lid.  My little football fan inside, in his red football shirt and black shorts and his freshly cleaned pair of football boots, would be proud.  He is clutching his Snuggly and a signed photograph of his football team heroes thanks to the local ‘Dorset Standard’ newspaper.  They reported the accident and Joe’s love of the team, and subsequently the club sent the photo with a moving tribute written on the reverse to their number one fan.  He would have loved to show that off to his friends at school, some of who had come today with their parents.  It was very moving when the youngsters had come to the front of the church with their mothers, and each lit a candle for Joe.

 

I had asked Sebastian to stay away, but I’m missing him and needing him now more than ever, and it occurs to me that I am becoming increasingly dependent upon him for support and company. 

Bella has been so strong, but I’m concerned that she’s not letting her grief run it’s natural course.  She seems more introverted, and even Chloe seems incapable of getting Bella to talk about her father and brother. 

My mother has given me the telephone number of a bereavement counselor, and I make a mental note to call her tomorrow although I suspect Bella will refuse to open up to a stranger.

 

It gives me great comfort and strength to have Joe’s friends and mine, and Alan’s family to our house after the funeral, although it’s with a heavy heart that I note Brian’s absence.  He did not utter a word to me in the church, and the arrangements were left to Dora, Sarah and I to make without his input.  Dora says he just needs time.  Part of the grieving process is anger, and when he moves past that stage he will see that the accident was not my fault.   She confided in me yesterday that she had, for some time, been worried about Alan’s drinking and she told me that Brian has always liked his whisky and so did his father before him, so it is a family weakness.  Not my fault.  Why do I feel so damned guilty then?

“Beth love.” Mike puts an arm around my waist and kisses my cheek.  “You know that I’m always here for you and Bella.  Alan would’ve wanted…you know… for me to look out for his girls.” His eyes are red and puffy. He has always been such a good friend to Alan and I. 

Mike and I are joined by Robert, who used to work with Alan until recent months.  Robert tells me he’s so very sorry for my loss, and I squeeze his arm and tell him that Alan always talked very highly of him.

             
“Don’t know why you two didn’t work out Beth.  I guess we all do things, meet new people who we think are gonna offer us more.  Then, you know, the grass isn’t greener and all that…” I’m at a loss to understand what Robert is trying to say to me, and I presume the red wine he’s sipping is fogging his brain.  “She was a looker alright Beth but not a patch on you love, he loved you ya know… not her, he didn’t love her.”

I will not calm down.  Mike is scratching incessantly at the back of his neck and shrugging, trying to tell me that he has no idea what Robert was referring to.  Or whom.  Everyone has gone home now but I have demanded that Mike stay behind so that I can quiz him further.

“She was a looker.  He loved me, but he didn’t love her.  Who, Mike, who?” I demand despite the hypocrisy of the situation, after all I was seeing Sebastian.  But that is not the point here.  I’m being blamed I know, by all and sundry for Alan leaving and yet it seems he was enjoying liaisons of his own with another woman.

             
“Ok look, he started seeing someone.  I only saw her once Beth honestly.  I don’t know how they met but she picked him up from the house once, in a big 4 x 4 car and I could see she wasn’t at all his type.  Younger, you know?  Bit flighty and provocatively dressed.”  I have heard enough.  After the emotions of today, all I want to do is fall into bed and block out the images I now have in my head of my dead husband’s betrayal.

6

The last few weeks have been the worst weeks of my life.  I can’t seem to concentrate on my business, and I’m growing tired of the pitied expressions on my staffs’ faces at work.  One very positive piece of news, is that Alan’s life insurance company have agreed to pay out on his life policy.  This means that in excess of one hundred thousand pounds will be arriving in my bank account some day soon.

 

It’s a cool, crisp Friday morning in late April and I’m at work, busying myself with monthly management accounts.  My mind frequently wanders to thoughts of Sebastian and of the wonderful weekends we spend together.  In just a few short hours he’ll be arriving, waiting for me after work.  He’s spent a couple of weekends with Bella and I in Dorset.

I have not been to Penmorrow since Christmas, and that seems a lifetime ago.  It just seems easier for him to drive to us, than for Bella and I to face the long drive to Cornwall.  Recalling our weekends together leads me to daydream once again about our passionate nights.  When I close my eyes I can feel the feather light touch of his fingertips on my skin.

 

“Hey you!” Ruth bounds in to my office with her insurmountable energy and I blush deeply, hoping she doesn’t notice.  “I have a fantastic suggestion and you simply must say yes.”  She has my attention.  “With the insurance payment I want you to take a few months off work.  Get entirely away from the business Beth, and let me run it.  You know I am more than capable so I really want you to bugger off” she teases.

“Where would we go, Bella and I, if we did clear off somewhere?” I ask.  The idea of taking a holiday without Alan or Joe was not something I could entertain and to go away with Sebastian would be incredibly insensitive for Alan’s parents and sister, so soon after the accident. 

Ruth raises her eyebrow the irritating way she does when she wants to say something but doesn’t dare.

“It’s just a thought Beth, but why don’t you take Bella to Cornwall?”  The resulting expression on my face shows the shock and surprise at Ruth’s suggestion. 

“Hear me out Beth,” she continues regardless.  “You and Sebastian get on really well, he’s been a rock for you these past few weeks.  I imagine it’s pretty laid back down in the sticks and you could do with the company.  Why don’t you take up painting or rambling or whatever they do down there.  Just go away and forget about the business, take some you time.” 

I shake my head incredulously.  She makes it sound so easy, so simple to run away to Penmorrow, but I know how difficult it will inevitably be to convince Bella to leave her friends and come away with me.  Although, she has become close to Sebastian and he clearly cares for her.  Some time in the country may not be such a ludicrous idea after all and I have missed that old house… I have even missed Scarlett who sent a beautiful card to Bella and I after the accident. 

“You know what Ruth, my darling friend, perhaps we will go.  You must promise to call me regularly and let me know of any problems at work.  And don’t make any big decisions without me!”  We hug and I’m so thankful for Ruth’s friendship.  Now I need to think through the plan, and decide how best to approach this decision with Bella.

 

My mobile phone pings.  I glance at the screen and see displayed, the first two lines of the message.

Hi sexy Rosie.  You never did call me.  How about that 2nd date? Si

Oh shit!  I thought he’d taken the hint weeks ago!  So much has happened since Simon and I spent an illicit afternoon and his message is not welcome.  I decide not to reply in the hope that he takes the hint.

My packed lunch is open on my desk and I’m busily studying financial information while munching on a chicken sandwich, when my office door opens.

“Have you got lunch Ruth?” I ask without looking up.

“Oh I’ve got a feast, Elizabeth.”  Sebastian leans against the doorframe, arms crossed drinking me in.

“Sebastian!” Leaping up from my chair, I throw myself into his muscular arms.

“Why didn’t you call and say you’d be arriving early?” It’s so wonderful to see him.  He kisses my hair and hugs me tightly, not wanting to let me free of his embrace.

“I wanted to surprise my girl.  Good to see you’re eating for a change,” he remarks, as he lifts my chin and gazes into my eyes with a dark, sultry stare.

“Plus, I wanted to check up on my investment.” Pushing me back at arms length, he eyes my body with an appreciative sigh and a dangerous look in his eyes.

“Fine,” I say haughtily, cocking my eyebrow, “the figures are on my desk.”

“Are they, Mrs. Dove?  First I’d like to check the figure in front of me.  Turn around.”  I do as he asks, giggling, feeling the sexual charge between us.

His hands slip around my waist, and he pulls me close, my back snugly against his front.  His waiting erection presses into the small of my back.  Grinding my ass harder against him teasingly, he sucks in his breath and cups my breast.

“Be very careful, Elizabeth or I may be forced to take action against you which could be construed as sexual harassment,” he warns, his voice raspy and sexy.

“I have no idea to what you’re referring,” my innocent butter-wouldn’t-melt reply earns me a hard slap on the buttock.

“Sebastian.  Someone might see us.”  Aware that my gossip-hungry staff would relish our sideshow, I push the door closed and sit down at my desk.

He perches on the edge of my desk, arms folded, and I can’t take my eyes off the vast erection straining against the fly of his trousers.

“Eyes on the figures, Mrs. Dove,” he says sternly, tapping his finger on the papers beside him.

My hands reaches across to his thigh and my eager fingers trail up to his rock hard penis, my hand massaging him through the fabric.  He’s so ready for me, his breath quickens and he’s flushed.  My fingers reach the pull of his zipper and tug it down just an inch.  His hand covers mine and he removes my hand from his lap.

“Mrs. Dove, do you brazenly come on to all your shareholders?” he gasps in mock shock.

“Only the minority ones, De Montfort.  I want your cock so badly.  You have to give it to me, it’s in the shareholder agreement you signed.”  I look up at him through my eyelashes, he’s grinning.

“I’ll get my lawyer to check that, Mrs. Dove.  I don’t recall a sexual favors clause.”

The door to my office opens abruptly.

“Oops.  Sorry.”  It’s Ruth.

“Hey Ruth.  Come in.” Sebastian plants a kiss lightly on Ruth’s blushing cheek.  Oh please, she fancies him.

“Not interrupting am I?” She can’t take her eyes off him.

“Not at all.  Elizabeth was just showing me the figures.  They look very impressive,” he is insufferable.

“Fantastic.  Shall we all go through to the Board Room? There’s more space in there, I can spread out the forecasts and get you a hot cup of coffee,” she suggests.

“Ruth, Sebastian isn’t here to go through the forecasts.  He’s just popped by to say hello, haven’t you Sebastian?” I look from Ruth to Sebastian.  He has a sly grin on his face.  Uh-oh.

“On the contrary, Elizabeth.  Why doesn’t Ruth show me through to the Board Room, while you fetch the coffee?  Strong. Black.  No sugar.” I grimace at him.  He’s playing games.

“Ruth, let’s go and sit at that vast expansive table shall we?” He grabs her hand and leads her from my office, winking at me as he leaves.  I will not rise to it, De Montfort.

Placing cups of coffee on the blotters in front of Ruth and Sebastian, I take my seat at the head of the table, purposefully putting distance between myself and my obtuse, game playing boyfriend.

“Thanks Elizabeth.  I have to say, this table’s a useful size isn’t it?” He blatantly stares at me, all innocence and innuendo mixed together, as he glides a hand across the polished walnut veneer.

“Very useful, Sebastian – especially for working at.” I raise an eyebrow.  Bring it on!  He grins.

“Ruth, I understand you’re my main point of contact here,” he asks, turning to my swooning friend.

“That’s right,” she replies, a little too eagerly.

“Good, well then, I imagine you and I will be spending a great deal of time together, working at this table over the coming months.”  I shoot him a frosty glare, he grins again.

BOOK: Sebastian - Dark Bonds
11.06Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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