Sebastian: The Complete Series (14 page)

“And this is?” He bit my ear after he whispered against my neck.

“Dirty. Hot. Wrong.” I clamped onto his shoulders tightly, thrusting into his hand. “You shouldn’t be here… not with me… not paying me.”

He was gone from my cock and I wailed out, not caring who heard me or saw me standing there with my hard cock hanging out of my jeans. His mouth was around me and I had to bite down on my fist to stop myself from calling out. He was sucking my cock like… well, like I was paying for it. I almost laughed, but his throat around my base made me turn to jelly again and I had to hold myself up on his shoulder while he fucked my cock.

“Robert. I'm coming.”

Our eyes met, seeing his strong lips wrapped around my cock, his brown eyes so full of need for me, his hand pulling his own cock in between in thighs—it got me there hard and fast and I shot into his mouth. He moaned as he came, his mouth still tightly wrapped around me, tasting me as I filled his mouth. I liked he was so excited by making my come that he finished with me.

While I leaned against the wall, breathing hard and watching him lick my head clean of any cum, I began to laugh and he smiled up at me. “Wasn’t it me who was supposed to be on his knees?”

“Hmm, I think it was. Does that mean I get fifty pounds?”

“You're worth more.”

As we both dressed and cleaned ourselves up, he gave a long frustrated sigh and leaned back on the wall opposite me. “I've never been involved with anyone who I really wanted. You're right about that, anyone who I've dated before, there was nothing there, no connection. With you… It’s just…” He shrugged his shoulders and we stared into each other’s eyes. “It’s like I'm drawn to you. I need you. I'm thirty seven in two months and I've gone through most of that time never feeling anything like this before. I didn’t think I would ever find anyone who I could be myself with and then I took you back to my hotel room and my life got complicated.”

I copied his stance and we just looked at each other for a few quiet moments. “Maybe you’ve been worried about showing what you really want, worried about what people will think. You shouldn’t be, I'm sure there are men who you know who would love you to act like this with them but do all the relationship stuff too.”

“You don’t get it.” He looked upwards and sighed. “You're so young, you don’t understand. You think you’ve experienced so much, but you're only nineteen. I'm a lot older, I've gone through a lot more. I've done the whole relationship thing, dated God knows how many men, fucked too many to remember.” He slid off the wall and came to me, holding my hips and kissing me softly. “So, believe me when I tell you, I've never felt this before. This isn't just good sex, Sebastian. I know what that feels like, this is more. That's why I'm pissed off. You haven't got enough experience to see how different this, but you will. Maybe in ten years’ time you'll look back and see what I'm trying to explain to you.”

“Maybe in ten years’ time when you're sitting with your husband and watching your two kids running around, you'll look back and laugh at this moment.” I closed my eyes, denying him the truth in them and he rested his head on my shoulder and sighed again. I was making him do that a lot.

“We connect, Seb.”

“I know.”

“Not just in bed.”

“No, in the street, the lift, the—”

“Enough!” He pushed me against the wall and glared at me. “Stop it. Don’t make this out to be a joke. You're not hiding from me. Not now. Just…” He grazed my cheek with knuckles and I gave in and looked at him. “Just be honest. You feel it too.”

“Yes, I feel it.” I pushed him from me and paced up and down in front of him. “I may be young, but I'm not exactly innocent, Robert. I've fucked too many to remember too. I don’t date and I've never had a relationship before, but I know this—” I waved between us both and he smiled softly. “—is different… special maybe, who knows.” I groaned then bit my lip. “I'm mad, frustrated. I get pissed off with it too. I try not to let it show, but you don’t give two fucks about letting me know just how much this whole thing irritates you. I get you don’t want to feel this for me, so why talk about it, huh? Just let it go and enjoy what we have while it lasts. Until you get over this and move on.”

“Until I get over it and move on?” He smiled and cocked a brow at me. “Right!” He shook his head then looked down the street. “You don’t want this?”

“Neither of us do, Robert.” I stroked his shoulder gently. “You don’t want to pay me, or God forbid date me while I screw other men. I couldn't deal with that so I wouldn’t expect anyone else to do it for me. I just want to enjoy life. I want you to enjoy me and not feel bad for doing it, but that's it. That's all it will be between us. Just sex.”

“Just sex?”

“Yes.”

“When there could be more?”

“More?” I twisted him to look at me and shook my head. “There’s no more between us and you know it. Don’t fuck me around, Robert. You don’t have to. I'm not going to piss off. I'm here for however you want me, that's why you pay me so much. You don’t have to win me over or sweet talk me. Save that for the men you date and take home to mummy.”

“Fine, Sebastian, if you want to play this card that's okay with me. If you really want to be just a fuck to me, if you want to be the whore you're trying so hard to be, then let’s do that. Let me take you back and I’ll make you feel like one.” I was pulled to his side and on the street in seconds.

He was storming us towards a taxi and pushing me in it before I took a breath.

We didn’t speak, what could we say to each other right then? Nothing which would resolve anything.

“There's no more, Robert.”

He didn’t reply. He continued to look out of the window and I felt a cold shiver run through me. I didn’t want him to hurt, and I knew inside, I was making a big mistake.

“You said you always told the truth,” he said softly. I couldn't look at him either and stared out of my window. “That it was the best medicine you could have and you didn’t always want it, but it was the only thing which could make you better.” He rested his palm on my thigh and squeezed gently. “Look at me and tell me this is what you want between us.”

I swallowed hard and put my best game face on. By the time I turned to look at him, I knew I was failing badly because I could see it in his eyes, see the sadness and the understanding. “There’s no more with me.” That was the truth. Maybe I did want it, but it wasn’t going to happen. “It’s shit and you don’t want to hear it, but that's the truth.”

He looked so sad, his big eyes were so emotional and heavy, then, just as quickly as his emptions came, they disappeared and he turned from me, fisting his hand in his lap and breathing hard.

I'd gotten what I wanted. I made him hurt. I needed him to just fuck me and leave. Just treat me like he was paying for it and get the fuck out of my life.

My beautiful mistake was hurting me like hell and I couldn't take it anymore.

I had no idea if he would live up to his promise to take me back and fuck me, and the saner part of me wanted him to just chuck me out and leave my life forever, but the smaller part, the part which was bleeding inside my chest—my stupid heart, was begging him not to.

All I could do was sit beside him, watching his stoic expression as he thought hard about what to do and hope he could make the right decision for both of us. He had to understand I was a lost cause. He must have known keeping me with him would only cause us both more pain, but when he turned to face me again, I knew I wasn’t going anywhere but with him, not because he’d decided it but because I was so desperate for him and he saw it.

That was the turning point for me, because that time it was all me. How could he refuse me when I knew my feelings were so clearly on show for him? It was me who decided, we didn’t have to say anything, we both knew we couldn't separate like this and he simply stroked my cheek, looking into my eyes as I struggled to hold back the heaviness of the tears I didn’t want to fall and smiled softly at me.

“There’s always more, Sebastian, and I'm about to show you how much more there could be.”

I hated him, and… Yes, my stupid heart which was aching in my chest thumped harder against my ribs when I realised I also loved him.

Stupid fucking heart spoiling all my fun.

What the hell was I supposed to do?

I had no idea, and all I could concentrate on right then was sitting back and letting myself drowned in everything about Robert. This couldn't go on.

I made a promise to myself, and no matter how difficult it was going to be, this would be our final time together.

It had to be.

R
obert and I didn’t talk as we made our way back up to his hotel room. We both knew we’d hit a wall and couldn't move on, which left us with just the sex. Either one of us could have stopped it. We could easily have gone our separate ways long before this point, but that wasn’t even an option. We both needed this. It was the only thing we did have.

He slammed the door shut as soon as I was inside. I was just as mad as he was, but some sane part of my brain told me to just let him get on with it. To let him take out what he felt on me and then I could use it and play it against him later, but I needed to show him I wasn’t a push over. I could give just as much back. Not exactly a great idea for an escort to piss off their client, but this is what he needed from me, and I knew how to please him.

I had him up against the wall and my mouth on his before he could say a word. It was wild, both of us ripping the other’s clothes off until we were naked, pushing and pulling, forcing each other against the walls and turning the other around, fighting for control when there was none.

It was gone.

Control was nowhere to be seen. It had fucked off into the distance the moment the door shut.

What was left was raw and frantic.

For the longest time there were no words from either of us. The only sounds were our heavy breathing and moans, our bodies colliding against each other, the bed shifting under our weights as we rolled around it—both pinning the other to the mattress while we forced our mouths together.

By the time he had me underneath him with my face pushed into the sheets and his cock rubbing against my hole as he sucked and bit on the back of my neck, I was ready to give in and he knew it.

He was grunting against my skin, pushing his hot length between my cheeks, dripping his precum over my hole as he worked us both into a crazy, mind-altering state where nothing but the two of us existed. He could have asked anything of me right then and I would have agreed.

“Head down, arse up. I want to see what I'm paying for,” Robert huskily growled out at me, delivering a short, smart slap to my arse.

I did as he said, watching as he grabbed the condoms and lube from the bedside table. He slicked his fingers up then massaged my hole, rolling his thumb around my opening before teasing me by pushing it inside me then removing it. I was already moaning and trying to back up on him, searching for more. For it deeper. Harder.

“You want more?”

“Yes,” I cried out as he inserted one of his thick fingers inside me.

He didn’t waste any time. He was right there, working me and milking my cock so it was dripping on the bed sheets beneath me. I'd never wanted fucking so badly, never needed or craved a person’s touch so much. It was desperation which made me whimper underneath him. He never usually took this long, and denying me by making me wait for him made me think of Anthony, and I hated having his face in my mind while I was with Robert.

“Please, Robert.”

“I'm having fun right here.”

“Don’t do this to me.”

“But this is what I want. Isn't it always about what
I
want?” His second finger slipped in and I sighed in relief feeling him stretch me open. “You should see how sexy you look opening up for me.” He grabbed my hand and pulled it between my legs. “Touch yourself. Feel my fingers moving inside you.”

Two of my fingers wrapped around his moving inside me, feeling my hole stretching and being fucked by his thick digits. “Robert… Give me another.”

“Sebastian.” The longing in his gravelly, throaty voice made my bleary eyes focus on him behind me, and it made me hurt seeing him so lost.

“Please.”

We shared a moment, and then he began to roll the condom on, keeping his eyes on his fingers fucking my arse.

“Please what, Seb?”

“Fuck me.”

“Fuck you? Is that all I get?”

“Please fuck me. Please, Robert, please.”

“You sound beautiful when you beg. I like it.” He sounded hoarse, his voice thick and husky as he took his fingers from me. “That's so fucking hot. Seeing you open and waiting for me. Your pretty hole looks hungry. It needs something to fill it up and satisfy it.”

“Your cock, give me it. I need it.”

He plunged into me, filling me in one quick, forceful thrust which made my back arch and my toes curl. He dug his fingertips into my hips as he clung onto me. “Fuck!”

“That's it. That’s what we need,” I called out, wanton and desperate.

“Yes! I need you, Seb. I need you so fucking much it hurts.”

“Show me. Take me.”

I was pounded hard—his thick cock reminding me why I needed this so badly. He took ownership of me and claimed every inch of my body as his own. I had no words, no thoughts. There was just his cock filling me and the pleasure it was giving me.

“You're mine. Tell me!” Robert demanded his answer from me—impatient and abrupt.

“I’m yours. All yours.”

“Money or not, you're mine, Sebastian.” His forceful tone made my already weak reserve melt beneath him. I’d never had anyone be domineering over me. Demanding everything from me, not asking or begging. He told me I was his and he was absolutely convinced of it.

“I know,” I wailed out, hiding my face in the sheets and stopping the sob which caught in my chest from coming out. “Please don’t…”

He stroked my back softly, pausing his thrusts for a few moments before he settled himself on top of me, riding me like some rodeo horse as he braced himself on the wall. Every time he pushed into me, I bucked back, forcing his long cock deeper into me and crashing against him. He was grunting, swearing, shouting out as we rammed into each other. My hips hurt from the force of his body banging into me.

My cock exploded, my arse clamping onto his cock, taking him with me as we both came together.

“Sebastian!”

I was too out of it to react. I collapsed underneath him, his cock slipping from my body as I turned into liquid on the sheets. He was beside me, kissing my body, running his hands over my sticky flesh, helping me roll onto my side so he could lie close to me and claim my mouth with hot, open mouthed kisses. He slipped his hand behind me, cupping my arse and holding it firmly, massaging me and moaning as he brushed over my hole. I was still hazy and struggling to catch my breath when he pressed two fingers back inside me and worked me with them as he growled like an animal in my ear.

“You feel so good. Used and slick.”

I lifted my leg onto his thigh and gave him more room to touch me.

“I could spend my whole life making you scream for me, Seb. Just hearing you beneath me, saying my name like that. It drives me mad. I need you. Sebastian—” I took his third finger inside me and bit his shoulder. “That's it, I want that.” He pressed his skin against my mouth and I sucked him, leaving a red mark on his flesh before I bit down again. “Bite me.”

I was on top of him, his fingers fucking me as I worked my mouth down his chest. I never bite—don’t like it, but right then, we both needed it. I was marking him as my own and he wanted it.

“You want me to be yours,” he whispered with that quiet, assured confidence.

“Yes.” Our eyes met and I grabbed both of our cocks, pulling them in time with his fingers inside me. “I want to fuck you.”

Robert blinked a couple of times, his sexy, astonished eyes staying on mine all the time. It was when he chewed his bottom lip that I smiled.

“Let me fuck you, Robert.”