Secret Pleasures (41 page)

He bowed, suddenly, remembering himself
.
“Forgive me, madam
.
Lady Westhaven is sorely missed by the household.
”

Arianna suddenly stood from a bench seat tucked into one of the windows, no doubt alerted by their presence
.
Before Ivy could respond to the butler’s comment or thank him for his assistance, he bowed once again and disappeared down the hall
.
She turned back to Arianna
.
Her expression urged Ivy to rush to her side.

Arianna must have seen the distress her tear-stained face caused and wiped at her eyes
.
“He has a fever.”

Ivy nodded with understanding
.
“May I see him?”

“His mother is with him now.
”
Arianna directed Ivy to the closed door closest to where they were standing
.
“Go in
.
I’m sure Mrs. Fitzgerald would welcome the company
.
I’ll hold Melody.”

“She
can be
fussy.
”
Ivy gripped her daughter, irrationally afraid someone would steal her from her and lock her in one of the mansion’s many rooms
.
How would Ivy ever find her again?

Both she and Arianna stared down at Melody’s wide, happy eyes
.

The door abruptly opened
. 

“He’s asking for you, Arianna.
”
Lily Fitzgerald blinked at Ivy standing next to Arianna
.
She rubbed her weary features.

Ivy adjusted Melody to her shoulder and rearranged her blanket to cover her face
.
Introducing Melody to Darien’s sister had not been a concern until now
.

“He’s awake.
”
Arianna’s obvious excitement caused Lily to smile sadly, and blink back what Ivy now realized were tears.

“No, he’s delirious.
”
Lily’s voice was rough but steady
.
“He’s mumbling your name
.
I think your presence might calm him.
”

Arianna strode to the door without a backward glance.

Lily watched Arianna disappear into the room, then stared at the closed door with a frown that drew down her entire face
.

“Ivy, I fear
…
”
S
he turned to face Ivy, really looking at her for the first time since she exited her son’s
sickroom
.
“Why
…
you’re holding a baby?
”

She came to stand beside Ivy and slipped the blanket away from Melody’s face
.
She studied her in wide-eyed fascination.

“She is beautiful. May I hold her
?
Please.
”
Lily Fitzgerald’s tired eyes flooded with her unshed tears.

Ivy sighed and handed her Melody
.
How could she not if it would distract Robert’s mother from her sorrow for even a moment.

“She looks so much like Darien
.
Why did no one tell me?
”
She cradled Melody, rocking her in her arms, laughing and crying simultaneously
.
Melody’s expression changed with each of her aunt’s wavering emotions
. 

“Under the circumstances, I thought it best to let her existence remain a secret.
”
Ivy would allow Lily to choose whichever unfavorable circumstance she wished.

“Never
.
She must be part of the family
.
She must.
”
Lily cradled Melody closer to her breast
.
“My mother would have loved to have held Darien’s child
.
She never had the opportunity to hold any of mine
.
What is her name?
”

“Melody
.
You must be exhausted, Lily
.
Allow me to take her from you
.
She’s frowning
.
That’s the face she makes when she’s soiled her diaper.
”
Ivy gently took the baby back.

“Melody,” Lily sang, proving she had not been neglected in inheriting her mother’s musical ability
.
“Lady Melody Blackmore
.
What a perfect name
.
Who thought of it
?
You or Darien?
”

“A mutual friend, though inspired by Darien’s musical gifts, of course
.
Oh, dear
.
Do you smell something odorous
?
If you would be so kind to direct me to a room, I’ll change her.
”
Ivy reached for Melody
.
“This might not be the best time to make introductions.
”

“This little one has the scent of springtime but let’s see for sure.
”
Lily whisked Melody from Ivy’s grasp and sat on the bench window seat
.
She laid Melody on her lap, unwrapped her blanket and buried her face into her belly
.
“She’s clean and dry
.
What a beautiful child
.
You’ve done such a fine job, Ivy.”

Melody giggled and a healthy blush stained her cheeks and limbs
.
Ivy noticed she had put on more weight
.
Despite her discomfort, Ivy could not help but be proud of her contribution to Melody’s vibrant health
.

“What a charmer you are.
”
Melody’s grin widened at her aunt’s coaxing
.
“She’s got that mischievous look in her eyes, like Darien
.
Melody will bring so much joy to this family
.
I just know it.”

“I don’t think every member of the family will agree.”

“I could take her to Ireland.
”
Lily tore her gaze away from Melody to glance up at Ivy
.
“Raise her as my own
.
No one would know the difference
.
Darien will eventually be the earl whether he likes it or not
.
He could be her escort into society as any father would.
”

“She’s my daughter, and I don’t intend to give her up.
”
Ivy stiffened.

“But she’s a Blackmore
.
She must be raised according to her birth
.
She must meet the right people.”

“She’s illegitimate,” Ivy said desperately.

“But that’s not how it has to be, you know
?
I can arrange everything so no one is the wiser.”

“No
.
She is Darien’s daughter also
.
I don’t think he would wish to be separated anymore than I.
”
Ivy was finally relieved that she had actually told Darien the truth.

“And you two will introduce her to the world as a bastard when it does not have to be so
?
Do you think that’s fair to your child?”

Ivy shook her head
.
“I think the love of her parents is more important.”

“Do you
?
Is that something you learned over the years
?
I would have wagered otherwise.”

Ivy could not find the words to argue
.
She just wanted Melody back in her arms.

“I won’t give up my daughter.”

“But you said you believed in the power of love
.
And love for a child is something one would do anything for
.
I think you’ve already discovered that.
”
Lily handed Ivy her daughter
.
“She is lovely, and I know you will do what is in her best interest
.
We all are doing what’s in our loved
one’s best interest
.
Henry Maddox is a formidable man who can cause everyone in this household
unheard-of
grief.”

Lily stood
.
“Excuse me
.
I must fetch some cool water and fresh clothes for Robert
.
Perhaps now would not be the best time for Robert to meet his cousin, but when he wakes, I know he will be as happy as I to make her acquaintance.”

Lily did not wait for her response, just opened one of the many doors facing the hall and disappeared by what Ivy glimpsed as a back staircase.

Ivy gathered Melody’s blanket around her, proceeding the way she came
.
She would march out the front door and never return
.
Ivy would sail to America alone before she would let anyone
take
Melody away from her.

***

Dawn crept beneath closed, heavy velvet curtains, signaling the end of Darien’s all-night vigil
.
The candles burned low and the fire had ebbed in the grate
.
Darien stood and stretched
.
His father had not
awakened
and he feared he never would.

The sense of hollow loss was surprisingly acute
.
He’d not learned the truth from his father
.
His passing would not dull that old hurt one bit,
but would
just heap more on top
.
Darien had convinced himself that his father had become dead to him long ago
.
Too late, he discovered he was wrong.

Darien needed to find Ivy and Melody and take them home
.
He’d
already
asked a servant who’d delivered more wood to keep the fire roaring hot, to find them a room for the night
.
Knowing the well-oiled workings of the staff, he was sure the butler had put them in his old suite of rooms
.
Even though his childhood apartment was finer and larger than Darien’s current stone dwelling, he wanted his family to be under his own humble roof
. 

His father remained still, his sheet hardly rumpled
.
Darien paused by the bed to grip his father’s hand before he left
.
Thank God it was still warm.

His father’s eyes flickered
open
, and it seemed to take him an
inordinately
long time to focus on Darien.

“How are you feeling?” Darien asked, as if his father’s appearance didn’t answer that question for him
. 

“Darien,” he mumbled
.
“There is something you must know
.
About Philip.”

“I’m listening.
”
Darien pulled the chair closer to the bed, sick to his stomach that he had forced this issue today
.

His father opened his eyes, struggled to lift his head then collapsed against the pillows
.
“We’re alone?”

“We are alone
.
What can I get you
?
Some water?”

“Philip, he
…
” his father whispered
.
Tears leaked from his eyes and wound down the lines etched in his shrunken skin
.
“He hung himself.”

“What?” Darien blinked
.
“Accidently?
”
All kinds of freakish mishaps happened on working farms
.
His father must not mean what Darien thought
.
Philip would never do himself in
.
That would be something one would expect of Darien, the weaker brother
.
The dark horse of the family.

“It happened like that man said
.
Collin Jacobson.
”
His father spat the name
.
Though his fierce gaze showed his venom, the right side of his face
drooped
.
“We found them together and I said he was dead to me
.
Not my son.”

His father’s slur thickened the faster he spoke
.
He paused to catch his shallow breath
.
Tears streamed unchecked down his face
.
Darien found a towel
on
the
nightstand
.
He gently wiped tears from his father’s cheek and chin.