Sempre (Forever) (21 page)

Ryan Thompson insisted it was a toga, but Carmine was certain the boy was wearing a dress. No if, ands, or buts about it.

Carmine tossed another ball, smirking when it landed in the cup in the front. Groaning, Ryan picked it up and chugged, swaying in his already drunken state. When it was his turn, he flung the ball so hard it bypassed the table and flew over Carmine shoulder.

“I quit,” Ryan slurred as Carmine landed another ball in one of his cups. He picked up the drink and staggered away without another word.

The party had been going for well over an hour, and there had yet to be any sign of Haven. Carmine set off through the crowd to search for her and laughed when he spotted Dia in the kitchen. She had on a colorful dress and bright blue tights, a yellow beak on her nose that matched her bright sneakers.

“Hey, Polly,” he said, playfully nudging her. “Isn’t it a bit strange that you look the most normal on Halloween?”

She rolled her eyes. “
Har-har-har
. Funny.”

Before either could say another word, a group of girls burst into the kitchen. Carmine groaned when he saw Lisa, dressed like a cat in a black bodysuit. “Who invited her?”

Dia grabbed his arm and led him out of the kitchen. “I’m pretty sure you did when you were going out with her.”

“I didn’t go out with her,” he said. “It was more like getting into her a few times.”

She cringed. “Gross.”

He laughed. “Yeah, well, I blame you. You’re my friend. You should’ve warned me against doing it… or her. Whatever.”

“I tried. You wouldn’t listen”

The foyer was empty besides people filtering in and out of the house to smoke. Carmine glanced toward the stairs just as Haven started down them in a gold dress. Fake gold coins hung from the edges, costume jewelry hanging around her neck with a crown in her hair. “She’s my treasure?”

For the second time that day, Dia just patted his cheek before walking away.

Carmine took Haven’s hand when she reached him. “
Bella ragazza
.”

There was a sparkle in her eyes as she gazed at their hands. “What does that mean?”

He smirked, pulling her toward the kitchen without an answer. They mingled in the crowd, and he introduced her to a few people standing around. She was attentive, smiling and greeting people like she'd been entertaining company her entire life. Watching her fascinated him, and he couldn’t help but think they’d done the world a grave injustice by keeping her locked away.

Haven excused herself to get a drink and was gone for a while, so Carmine went in search of her again. As soon as he hit the doorway to the kitchen, Tess walked up to Haven and held out her glass. “Get me some punch.”

Carmine held his breath, waiting for her reaction, but Haven barely hesitated. “No.”

Tess’s mouth fell open. “Excuse me?”

“I said no. The punch is right there if you’re thirsty.”

A swell of pride shot through Carmine. “I guess she told you.”

Haven jumped, having not heard him approach.

“Yeah, I guess she did,” Tess said, filling her glass with punch as she shook her head. “About damn time, too.”

Tess walked away, and Carmine grabbed Haven’s hand to twirl her around. “Ah, you're amazing! No one ever stands up to her.”

Haven laughed, nearly losing her balance as Carmine pulled her to him. Buzzing from the alcohol, he wanted nothing more at that moment than to feel her close to him. He gripped her hips and swayed her tense body to the music. “Relax,
tesoro
.”

The anxiety in her expression lessened. He pulled her arms over his shoulders before placing his hands back on her hips.

“Will you ever tell me what anything means?”

“
Tesoro
means treasure, but it’s kinda like sweetheart. So
tesoro
, treasure... which, right now, you literally are.”

She blushed, looking away from him, and he took the opportunity to dip her backward. Yelping, she wrapped her arms around his neck and laughed when he pulled her back up.

Their noses rubbed together, and he froze abruptly when Haven cocked her head to the side and brushed her lips against his. He thought he imagined it at first, until he tasted the strawberry gloss from her lips. Haven pushed away from him, covering her mouth, and he was too stunned to do anything but stare.

Haven backed up a few steps, and he grabbed her arm when he realized she was about to run. Swinging her to him, her hands fell from her mouth, and he pressed his lips to hers without another thought.

It was passionate and messy, seventeen years worth of kisses rolled into one stolen embrace. Haven kissed him back, her lips parting as they moved with his. Running her hand along the back of his head, she laced her fingers in the hair by his neck. She trembled. Whether it was from nerves or excitement, Carmine wasn’t sure.

“Holy shit!”

They broke the kiss at the sound of Dominic’s voice. He stood in the doorway to the kitchen, staring at them with shock.

“I, uh… have to go,” Haven said, bolting from the room before either of them could stop her.

“I didn’t mean to barge in,” Dominic said, smacking Carmine on the back. “But man, I didn’t expect to see that.”

Carmine shook his head, dazed. He hadn’t expected it either. “Did anyone else see?”

“Just Kayla, I think.”

“Who?”

“You know,
Kayla, wanna lay-ya
? She’s Moanin’ Lisa’s friend.”

Carmine groaned.
Just great
.

*  *  *  *

Haven glanced in the bathroom mirror and smiled, bringing her hand up to her mouth. Her lips tingled from the force of Carmine’s, her lip-gloss smudged off.

Her mind worked rapidly as she tried to sort it all out. What did it mean? Did he feel the same sparks she did?

Someone pounded on the door, saying they needed to use the bathroom, and Haven slipped back out to head for the stairs. She made it halfway up to the second floor when she spotted Lisa standing in her path. Haven stared at the ground, hoping she’d overlook her, but the moment she reached Lisa, she intentionally knocked her into the wall.

Backing away, Lisa smiled wickedly. “Oh, I didn’t see you there!”

Haven winced and said nothing, not wanting to cause a scene. She turned away, but ignoring Lisa was the wrong thing to do. An elbow shot out, jabbing Haven in the ribs, and her eyes welled with tears as she clutched her side.

A hand grabbed Haven’s arm, and she turned to see a blond haired boy. He smelled sour, his eyes bloodshot, but his expression appeared genuinely concerned. “You okay?”

She blinked to clear her tears, not wanting to cry. “Yes.”

“I know Lisa can be a bitch,” he said. “I’m Ryan, by the way.”

“Haven,” she said. “I was just going to bed.”

Ryan’s eyes bulged as he looked her over. “You’re the girl that’s living here? I’ve heard about you. How do you know the DeMarco’s?”

Panicking at the question, she took a step away from him. “I should just go.”

She turned to head for the third floor when Ryan spoke again. “At least let me help you up the steps.”

*  *  *  *

Carmine searched for Haven after their kiss and headed upstairs when he didn't find her anywhere. He froze when he made it to the library, his muscles quivering as he fought back his anger. Ryan stood in front of her door, his drunken body swaying.

Carmine didn’t think about what he was doing, didn’t pause to consider the consequences. All that mattered was he was up here in the one place he wasn’t supposed to be.

He sprinted for her door and grabbed back of Ryan’s sloppy dress, yanking him away. Ryan stumbled, and Carmine threw him into the wall. Before Ryan had time to react, Carmine punched him. Screaming, Ryan slumped to the ground to get away, but there was no Coach Woods there to save him this time. He balled himself in the fetal position as Carmine kicked him, ignoring the shouting behind him on the stairs.

Dominic grabbed Carmine, pulling him back. “Calm down!”

Carmine shrugged him off and crouched down to Ryan. “If you come near her again, I'll kill you.”

There was a loud gasp, and Carmine turned his head to see Haven staring at them. He stood up and reached out to her, but she recoiled. Running back into her room, she slammed the door behind her. The click of the lock stopped Carmine in his tracks.

*  *  *  *

The pounding on the door was loud, vibrating the walls with its force. Tears streamed down Haven’s cheeks as the noise ripped her back to another time.

Bang. Bang. Bang
. Haven lay huddled in a ball in the corner stable, covering her ears but it did nothing to muffle the sounds. She didn’t know what was happening—her mama was gone when the banging woke her up—and she was too frightened to do anything but lay there.

Bang. Bang. Bang
. It seemed to grow louder with time. Where was her Mama? Haven squeezed her eyes shut tightly, counting in her mind to try to make it go away. She made it to six before she lost her place, starting over but never making it to ten.

Bang. Bang. Bang
. There was whimpering and crying, but it didn’t come from her. It felt startlingly close but yet so far away, a place Haven couldn’t reach in the darkness.

Bang. Bang. Bang
. She heard the voice then, malicious and low. He hissed like a snake as he spoke the scathing words, “If you tell anyone about this, I’ll kill you.” She didn’t know who was saying it or what they weren’t supposed to tell, but the crying nearby grew louder at the sound of them. “I promise I won’t,” another voice spoke, this one heartbreakingly familiar. “Just please—I’m begging you—leave my baby girl alone.”

Bang. Bang. Bang
. It eventually faded, silence taking over but doing nothing to comfort Haven. She opened her eyes, hoping it was a nightmare, and the first thing she saw was her monster’s vicious face. He stood just outside the stall, buckling his pants as he stared at her.

Her stomach felt as mangled as her monster’s deformed skin. Her chest ached from crying, a void deep inside of her that would never again be filled. Her mama came back that night, shivering as she hugged her tightly, but she wasn’t there now to calm Haven’s fears.

“Haven?” Carmine’s voice was soft, his loud banging now a subtle tap on the door. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Chapter 14

There was blood in the hall, the vibrant red splattered on the white wall like paint on a fresh canvas. Haven was trying to wipe it away with a rag when Carmine’s bedroom door opened. Disheveled, he looked down at her sitting on the floor. “What are you doing? You shouldn’t be doing that!”

He snatched the rag from her hand, and Haven’s eyes welled with tears. Overwhelmed and exhausted, she couldn’t take him looking at her the way he was.

“Fuck, are you crying?”

She turned away, wishing she would stop reacting so intensely. It only ever made things worse. She looked back at him just as his hand flew in her direction, and she recoiled, moving out of his reach. He froze, his face clouding with confusion as he dropped his hand. “I can’t seem to get anything right with you.”

“I’m sorry,” she said, not understanding. She was only trying to clean up the blood before it left a stain.

He groaned, throwing the rag down as his voice rose with passion. “You’re sorry? For what
? Ciò è scopare pazzesco
! I’m gonna lose my mind if we don’t stop this dance we’re doing!”

Dance? “What are you talking about?”

He grabbed her arm, and the zap of tingles coursed through her. She wondered why he was touching her, an irrational part of her wishing he’d never stop. When he touched her, she didn’t feel so alone.

“Tell me you don’t feel that, and I’ll back off.”

She stared at his hand. ”You feel it too?”

“Of course I feel it. It had to be obvious. I kissed you last night.”

She blinked a few times. “But I kissed you. I shouldn’t have, because you told me you didn’t...”

“You barely grazed my lips. I practically assaulted your mouth,” he said, shaking his head. “And you’re right—I don’t do that, which is what makes it so crazy. I've been trying to tell you that.”

He ran his fingers through his unkempt hair as he stared at her, his eyes imploring her, but for what she didn’t understand. “Tell me what?”

Her question was met with silence. He slumped against the wall and brought his knees up, wrapping his arms around them. “I would’ve cleaned up the blood,” he said. “I caused it.”

“Was he okay?”

“He’s like a cockroach. I could cut his head off, and he’d still run around pestering people.”

She sighed at his unwillingness to give her a straight answer. “He helped me, you know. I got cornered going up the stairs, and he walked me to my room.”

His eyes narrowed. “Who cornered you?”

His question, too, was met with silence. It may not have mattered to him whether or not Ryan was okay, but it mattered to her.

“He’ll make a full recovery,” he said. “Looked a lot worse than it was. Now, who cornered you?”

“Lisa.”

“Did she touch you?”

“Yes, but it wasn’t that big of a deal,” she said, pausing before adding, “Looked a lot worse than it was.”

He wasn’t amused. “She has no right to lay a finger on you.”

“Are you going to beat her up for touching me, too? First Nicholas, now Ryan. Who next? Are you going to beat up everyone who touches me? I know I have no right to tell you what to do, but I don’t like people being hurt because of me. If you want to blame anyone, blame me. Punish me. But please don’t keep hurting them.”

He stared at her, his mouth hanging open, and she wondered if maybe she shouldn’t have said that. It was strange how at ease she’d become when speaking to Carmine. “You think I look at you that way?”

“I don’t know what to think. When you attack those people, it’s like you’re upset they’re messing with something that's yours.”

He laced his fingers in his hair, tugging on a handful of the locks. “Sometimes I have a problem with my temper. It’s just, I feel…” He hesitated, taking a deep breath. “Look, it's not because I think you belong to me—it’s because I want you to be mine.”