Shadow Walker (17 page)

Letting him go was what caused this. Had she just held onto him a little longer, if she hadn’t left Walker’s Run. If she had just stood up to them and insisted…the tears came, and she sobbed while Braedyn held her back for the paramedics to lift Dean into the waiting ambulance.

“It’s going to be all right, Amber. Go to the hospital. I’ll get Casey to rest and we’ll be there soon.” His voice was gentle. He used the gift of the Alpha to try and calm her.

Once the gurney was loaded and locked into place, Amber clambered inside and took up residency on the right side, taking his hand.

Dean’s face had taken on a waxy pallor and his lips were turning grey. The paramedics slipped an oxygen mask over his head.

A large hand gently moved back and forth between her shoulder blades. It was a comforting gesture, and before she’d have pulled away, rebuking any sort of touch. But Peyton was grieving just as hard. Dean was his son.

The ride to the hospital seemed far too short, and she had to let him go. Choking back a sob, she watched the paramedics rush Dean down the hall while Peyton dragged her away.

Two hours…two hours he’d been in surgery. No one had come to talk to them. Peyton paced around the waiting room.

“Hey,” he said, sitting down next to her.

She hadn’t spoken since leaving the garden. Her eyes were no longer swollen. The accelerated healing of the Were took care of the embarrassing side effects of a cry fest. Looking in Peyton’s eyes, she took a shuddering breath, struggling to contain her emotions.

“He’s going to be okay, Amber.”

Pinching her eyes shut, she tried to stifle the sob rising in her throat. “Is that how you really feel, or are you trying to make me feel better?” Her voice was scratchy from crying.

Reaching over, he took her hand. “Sometimes it’s not quite as easy to get an accurate read on those closest to you, for me anyway. I’ll get a bad feeling when something’s gone wrong or when they are in trouble. But it seems that’s the extent of my ability when it comes to my children,” he admitted.

Amber pulled her hand away from him and walked over to the window that looked down over the parking lot. “I just can’t stand sitting here like this. Not knowing. I’m not out there trying to find the bastard who did this. Instead I am in here, letting my emotions get the best of me. They were something I had kept locked so tight inside, until I met him.” She clenched her fists and pounded them against her thighs. “I can’t help but wonder why I opened up like this when I could lose him,” she whispered, hot tears coursing down her cheeks. “If I had known it was going to be this soon…”

Peyton leaned over and pulled her into his arms. Amber didn’t fight, but clung to him, doing something she’d only ever previously done with Dean. After a moment, she pulled away and dried her eyes.

“I need some coffee,” she said, letting out a deep breath. The emotional and physical exhaustion was creeping up on her, but Amber knew there would be no rest until she knew how Dean was.

“I’ll get it.” Peyton left the room.

She turned to the window again. The day was dreary and wet. The rain was washing away what minimal snowfall they’d had in these parts, but they were due for a hard freeze come nightfall. It was still cold, but it was a damp cold she wasn’t particularly fond of. With a shiver, Amber hugged herself and rubbed her arms.

Peyton drifted back in with two Styrofoam cups rather than the paper ones from the machine that served mud rather than actual coffee. “I convinced the nurses to let us get some of their reserve,” he said with a wink.

Amber looked up at him, wanting to put a smile on for his benefit. It was clear Peyton was trying his best. She took a sip from the cup and grimaced. It tasted like pure hell, but it was loads better than the seventh level of hellish mud they’d received from the machine.

“I just…” she looked up at him and tears filled her eyes, threatening to fall. “I just wish I could have told him how I felt. I tried to…but the words wouldn’t come out. Doing it in front of Casey and Aaron wasn’t something I could force myself to do. It’s so stupid, I know that now. It was so easy for him to just spit it out, why couldn’t I?” Sniffling, she dabbed at her nose with a damp tissue.

“Well, how do you feel Amber?” Peyton asked, his voice gentle.

“I love him,” she answered without hesitation. “I have fought for so long not to have any emotional attachments to
anyone
…and it takes him no time at all to bust down every barrier I put up.” She drew a shuddering breath, fisting her hands, fighting to hold back the tears.

Peyton’s expression softened. He placed a hand on her knee. “He’s an empath, Amber. Regardless of whether you said it or not, he could feel it. That I can assure you.”

The door squeaked open and a scrub-clad doctor walked in. He wore glasses, was middle-aged, balding, but his eyes were lit with fierce intelligence. His expression was unreadable. “Mr. Maynard?”

Peyton rose and cleared his throat. Amber rose with him, not minding when he tucked her against his side. She sensed it was as much for his support as for hers. “Yes.”

The doctor took a deep breath and looked at Amber. “I’m surprised to give you this news. I fully didn’t expect Dean to make it off of the operating table.” He wrung his hands together for a moment. “He’s stabilized, but still not out of the woods yet. But with his strength and health, I suspect he’ll make a full recovery. There will be some scarring of course, but…” The doctor shrugged. “The price of plastic surgery is hardly comparable given he’ll survive this encounter.”

Amber closed her eyes, feeling her knees grow weak.

Peyton tugged her close against his side to steady her. “When can we see him?” he asked, echoing her thoughts.

“He’s being transferred to ICU as we speak, but I suspect he’ll be moved into a private room before evening arrives.”

She let out a deep shuddering breath, unable to hold back the tears of relief.

The doctor smiled when Peyton shook his hand. “Dean surprised us all in there. There must be something he had worth fighting for,” he said, his gaze sliding toward Amber.

Peyton smiled, hugged her close, and glanced down at her. “Yes, he absolutely does.”

* * * *

While Dean was being transferred to his room, Amber called Braedyn to inform him of the details while Peyton called Laveaux to apprise him.

She glanced at her watch and saw it was almost noon. It rang a few times before he answered sounding groggy.

“I’m sorry to wake you,” she croaked. Her voice still sounded awful from all the crying she’d done.

“No, don’t be. How is he?”

“He’s out of surgery. They are getting ready to take him to a recovery room and this evening, to a private room.”

“Good, I’m so glad.” There was a pause. “How are you holding up?”

She sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose. “Relieved. I’m not sure ‘all right’ or ‘okay’ can describe what I’m feeling at the moment.”

“I’m sure. You try and get some rest. You’re going to need it.”

“I’m going to try. When they move him to recovery they will be taking us to a new waiting room where I’ve been assured there are couches. I’ll try to take a catnap after I go in and see him. How’s Casey?”

“She’s sleeping. In order to recharge, she needs a lot of rest. That second shift took everything out of her this morning. Once he gets into a private room, I’m going to bring her up there.”

“I need to be out there this evening. There’s no way you can handle the final night of their shift and track Elan.”

“No, you stay where you are. There…there is a team of Guardians here now. Laveaux called in reinforcements. Another, smaller one should be up there at the hospital soon. I want you to stay put. Dean needs you.”

“My job is to be there—”

“Amber, that’s enough,” Braedyn said, his voice firm with authority. “You stay there with him…” He cut off mid-sentence.

“What’s the matter?”

“Someone is beating on the door downstairs. They’ve been beating for a minute or so, and no one has answered it.”

“Aaron is probably still out cold. Oh shit, it’s probably Dori! She has no idea about what’s going on Braedyn.”

He grumbled. “What does she look like? I’m looking through one of the windows near the door.”

Amber could hear the tempo of the banging increase, and stopping herself short of giggling, cleared her throat. “She’s just a little shorter than Casey with light brown hair, blue eyes, thin build, dark tan, sexy as hell Greek chick,” Amber rattled off quickly.

Braedyn grunted. “It’s her. I’m going to let her in. I have no clue what I’m going to say. When you see Dean you tell him we’ll be there soon.”

“I will. Good luck with her, by the way.”

He scoffed. “Yeah.”

Amber couldn’t stop her hands from shaking when she walked into Dean’s private room. When they’d allowed her to see him in recovery, they’d cautioned her about touching him. He’d still been under the effects of anesthesia. He’d awakened for a moment and squeezed her hand once.

His right eye was swollen shut, his face a mask of bruises. Bandages reached from his neck to his waist. Elan had done tremendous damage.

Peyton wasn’t with her now. Three very large gentlemen had approached just when they were transitioning to the private room. She’d been ready for a fight, but he calmed her with a gentle hand and introduced the men as friends and colleagues. Rather than disturb her or Dean, he’d taken them outside.

With a yawn, she pulled a chair over next to his bed. Twenty minutes of sleep was all she’d managed on the hard couch in the waiting room. It was now just after three p.m., and she felt guilty for sitting here when there were other responsibilities.

Reaching over, Amber picked up Dean’s hand and held it to her cheek. There was no way she would leave him now. The police believed it to be another wild animal attack. So there were no guards posted at his door.

Her fear now was if he’d been bitten. The doctor had said there were lacerations. Hundreds of them, but they looked more like they’d come from blunt but sharp claws rather than rips and shreds from teeth. To be on the safe side, they’d begun a rigorous and painful series of rabies injections. She was sure in comparison to the pain he was already feeling, the shots weren’t much to be concerned with.

“Amber?”

Turning to the door, she saw Casey. Relief flooded her at the sight of her friend. Trying to swallow back the tears, Amber waived her in.

“He hasn’t awakened since they brought him in here,” Amber whispered, stroking Dean’s hand.

The haunted look on the blonde’s face spoke volumes. “Last time he was in the hospital was when they sent him home from Iraq. Dad and I went to Bethesda back in 2005. He looks worse now than he did then.” Gripping the foot of the bed, she shivered. “Was he bitten?”

Amber’s stomach knotted. “The doctor isn’t sure. He can’t really tell, but they aren’t ruling it out. They are giving him rabies vaccinations, as if
that
was our real worry,” she scoffed and kissed the palm of Dean’s hand. “Are you all right?”

Casey’s brow was knotted with worry. “I think so.”

“Are you in any pain?” It finally registered that Casey had managed another shift into the Silver Wolf. In all the commotion and worry, she hadn’t had a chance to congratulate her friend.

The blonde shook her head. “No, maybe we ought to take some of that medicine just before we change.” Casey’s grin was short-lived when she glanced back at her brother. “I got some rest. I just hope it was enough.”

“Give yourself a little bit. Usually through transformation any injuries or drainage of energies are rectified in the process. Being so new though…and not being able to properly channel everything…” Amber frowned a moment. “You changed again, correct?”

Casey nodded, walking around the bed so she could hold Dean’s other hand. “When I heard your roar, I knew it had to be Dean. All I could think of was getting to you,
fast
. Next thing I knew, I saw you holding him on the ground…”

“So you managed a second shift. How was the pain?”

Frowning a moment, she shook her head. “All I could think of was Dean. I don’t even remember changing forms. I was just…there. It was too soon for the medicine to have kicked in, wasn’t it?” she asked with a smile.

Amber gave a grin and nodded. “Soon as I can, I will give you some tips on meditation, channeling, and grounding. You need to learn what you can do to conserve energy so you won’t be drained like this morning.” She rose, setting Dean’s arm back on the bed. Standing, she stretched and rubbed her eyes and tried to bat away a yawn.

Casey sighed and rolled her shoulders. “I don’t have a whole lot of time. Braedyn has to get me and Aaron back out into the forest before sunset. You know this is going to take some fancy explaining.”

“Your dad said he had a plan though.” Looking down at Dean on the bed, her heart felt like it was torn in two. She was unable to believe just how much she felt for the man lying there. Her entire life, emotions had to be kept under wraps.

Tears swelled in her friend’s eyes. She nodded.

Braedyn and Peyton stepped into the room.

“Guard the door,” Casey said, looking back down at her brother.

Without a word, Peyton shifted his step and blocked the view from the little rectangle on the door, wedging the heel of his boot at the base. Braedyn stood just a foot away. The entrance to the room was secure. Both men were quiet while they waited.