Shameless (19 page)

His hand, which had started to creep under
my panties, paused and he gave me an odd look.  “You want to go out in public
with me?”

I gave him my own odd look.  “Yes.  Why
wouldn’t I?”

“In case you haven’t noticed, Maddie, we’re
not exactly at the same level of class.  What if you run into someone you
know?  You really want to be seen with me?”

I pushed away from him before poking him
sharply in the stomach.  “You don’t honestly think I give a shit what other
people think or say, do you?”

He just shrugged and I poked him again. 
“You’re just as good, if not better, than me or anyone else I know, Riley
Walker.  If I hear you talking shit about yourself again, I’ll beat the crap
out of you.”

A grin crept across his face and I glared
at him.  “I’m tougher than I look.”

“Yeah, I know, Mads.”  He pulled me against
his hard body and kissed me firmly, sweeping his tongue into my mouth until I
was panting and rubbing my pelvis against his growing erection.

“You sure you want to go out?  Because I
was thinking a good way to celebrate would be you riding my dick all night.”

I moaned softly as he sucked on my
earlobe.  “We can do both.”

“I guess,” he muttered before squeezing my
breast.

I wiggled out of his grip.  “I just need to
change and then we’ll go.  I know the perfect place to celebrate.”

He looked down at his t-shirt and jeans. 
“Is this place fancy?  I don’t do fancy.”

“It’s not fancy,” I said.  “Don’t worry,
Riley.  You’ll like it.”

I started down the hallway before pausing
and giving him a shy look.  “Can we take your bike?”

“You want to ride the bike?”

“Yes, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t.  But,” he grinned wickedly, “you
might want to reconsider having your pussy eaten first.  The vibrations might
be too much to handle when you’re as horny as you are, kitten.”

I stuck my tongue out at him.  “I think
I’ll manage.”

“I guess we’ll find out,” he replied.

R
iley

I shut off the bike and waited patiently as
Maddie climbed off a bit clumsily.  Her face was flushed and as I dropped the
kickstand and slid off my bike, I grinned at her.

“That is so awesome,” she said excitedly. 
“I mean I was pretty sure I would still like it but it was even better this
time!”

“I’m glad you liked it,” I said.

“I loved it!” 

She had a child-like look of glee on her
face and I laughed before winking at her.

“Maybe I’ll teach you how to drive it one
day.”

Her eyes widened and she shook her head. 
“Nope, I’ll stay strictly a passenger, thanks.  Now, c’mon, I’m starving.”

I stared at the restaurant in front of us. 
“What is this place?”

“It’s a sushi restaurant.  The best in the
city.”

“No way,” I said.  “I’m not eating raw
fish.”

“Have you tried sushi before?”  She asked.

“No and I’m not going to,” I said.

“How old are you?”  She asked suddenly.

“I’m thirty-one, why?”

“No one can go thirty-one years without at
least trying sushi,” she said firmly.  “If you don’t like it, we’ll leave and
go somewhere else.  Okay?”

“I already know I’m not going to like it.”

She laughed.  “You don’t.  C’mon, Riley. 
Be brave and try something new.”

“Fine,” I grumbled.  “But when I spit the
sushi all over the table, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

* * *

“Well, what do you think?”  Maddie asked.

“It’s not half bad,” I admitted.  “I don’t
like that one though.”  I pointed to the raw tuna sitting on the small block of
rice.

“It’s an acquired taste,” she said
cheerfully before popping one into her mouth. 

I watched as she used the chopsticks.  She
had given me a lesson on how to use them, giggling a little at my awkward
attempts but her gentle teasing hadn’t bothered me. 

Abandoning my fumbling with the chopsticks,
I picked up a larger roll with my fingers and dipped it gingerly into the soy
sauce before eating it. 

“Hey, this one is pretty good.”

“That’s a dynamite roll,” she said.  “Here,
try this one.”

I picked up the small roll and ate it
gingerly.  “It’s okay.”

“That’s the smoked salmon.  It’s one of my
favourites.”

We ate in silence for a few moments before
Maddie smiled at me.  “Thanks for trying the sushi, Riley.”

“You’re welcome.  How was your day?”

“It was pretty good,” she said.  “I have a
new client who – “

“Maddie?”

My back stiffened and I stared at the man
who had stopped at our table.

“Hi, Tim,” Maddie said, giving me a quick
glance.

“I didn’t know you ate here,” he said. 
“It’s great, isn’t it?”

“It’s my favourite,” she said.  “You
remember Riley?”

Tim turned his gaze toward me and I felt a
surge of anger at the blank look in his eyes. 

“Uh,” a flicker of recognition crossed his
face.  “Right, right – the roommate.  How are you?”

“Fine,” I grunted before looking back at my
plate.

“If I had known this was your favourite
restaurant, I would have invited you out tonight,” Tim said to Maddie.  “I’m
here with a few of the other people from the office.”

He pointed across the restaurant to a table
of people.  Maddie waved briefly before smiling at Tim. “I guess you’ll know
for the next time.”

“I will.”  Tim smiled at her, his gaze
dropping briefly to her cleavage, and anger burned in my belly.

“Say, why don’t you join us?  We have more
than enough room at our table,” Tim said.

“No thank you,” Maddie said.  “Riley and I
are having a private celebration.”

“What are you celebrating?”  Tim asked
curiously.

“None of your damn business,” I said.  “Get
lost, Tim.”

He stared at me in surprise as Maddie
frowned at me before smiling at Tim.  “Thanks for the invitation, but we’ll
pass.”

“Right,” Tim was still staring at me and I
returned his look with undisguised contempt until he flushed and looked away.

“Are you attending the client appreciation
dinner next month?”  Tim asked.

I sighed irritably as Maddie nodded. 
“Yes.”

“Good, good.  I am too.  Maybe we should go
together.”

“Oh, um, that’s nice of you but – “

“Say yes, Maddie.”  Tim wheedled.  “We can
be each other’s plus one.”

“Actually,” Maddie said suddenly.  “I’m
bringing Riley as my plus one.”

I hid the look of surprise on my face as
Tim looked at me.  He studied the tattoos on my arms and neck before turning to
Maddie.  “You’re taking him?”

“Yes,” Maddie said firmly. “I am.”

Tim hesitated before saying, “Maddie, are
you sure that’s a good – “

“Goodnight Tim,” Maddie interrupted.  “It
was nice to see you.  I’ll talk to you on Monday at the office.”

“Right,” Tim said.  “Have a good weekend.”

With one final glance at me, he returned to
his table.  Maddie released her breath in a loud sigh and smiled tentatively at
me.

“That guy’s a dick,” I said loudly.

She shushed me hurriedly.  “He’ll hear you,
Riley.”

“Like I give a fuck,” I said grouchily. 
“He wants in your fucking pants, Maddie.”

“No,” she said.  “He wants me to have a
smaller pant size.”

“What?”  I scowled at her and she shrugged.

“Never mind.  I’m not interested in Tim,
okay?”

My good mood had vanished and I gave her a
sullen look.  “I don’t care if you are.  We’re just roommates, remember?”

“Riley – “

“Forget it, Maddie.  Just eat your damn
sushi so we can get out of here,” I snapped.

* * *

M
addie

I stormed into the house and dropped my
purse on the hallway table before kicking off my shoes.  I had spent the entire
ride home angry and confused.  Riley had been sullen and quiet for the rest of
the meal and I had no idea what his problem was but I was pissed.

Riley slammed the door shut and tugged his
boots off with a grunt before hanging his leather jacket on the hook.  Ignoring
him, I walked into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water.  Riley
followed me and I glared at him as he leaned against the wall.

“What’s your problem, Riley?”

“I don’t have a problem,” he said angrily.

“Bullshit!”  I snapped.  “Tell me why
you’re being such a dick.”

He shrugged.  “This is just who I am,
kitten.  You don’t like it, I can leave.”

“And go where?  Hmm?”  I asked.  “You need
me, Riley.”

“I don’t need anyone,” he growled.  “Never
have and never will.”

I rolled my eyes.  “Of course you don’t. 
Big tough Riley is perfectly fine on his own.”

“That’s right,” he said stubbornly.

“It isn’t a weakness to need someone,
Riley.  Or to allow someone to care about you.”

“Care about me?”  He laughed bitterly.

“Yes,” I said firmly.  “I care about you
and I want what’s best for you.”

“No, what you want from me is my dick in
your pussy,” he said crudely.  “I give you something you never got from your
dickhead fiancé and – “

“You asshole!”  I shouted.  “Do you
honestly think that’s why I let you stay here?  Because of your dick?”

“Isn’t it?”  He said.

“No!  It isn’t!”  I shouted again.

“Of course it isn’t,” he said sarcastically.

Anger and shame was making my entire body
tremble.  Riley thought I was a whore.

Are you so certain you’re not?  You like
what Riley does to you, how he makes you feel.  You like knowing that someone
like him – a man who could have any woman he wanted – wants you.  Fat Maddie
who turned her fiancé gay.  You have nothing else in common other than sex.  If
he wasn’t fucking you every night, you’d ask him to leave.

My stomach dropped and I blinked back the
hot tears.  Yes, I liked the sex, fucking loved it in fact, and there was no
point in denying that knowing Riley wanted me made me feel powerful and
desirable for the first time in my life.  But that wasn’t the only reason I
wanted him to stay.  Was it?

“Maybe you should sleep in the guest room
tonight,” I said dully. 

“Maybe I should,” he muttered.

“Fine,” I said wearily before slipping past
him.  “Good night, Riley.”

* * *

His cries from the guest room woke me and I
stared silently at the ceiling.  It was just after three and I had fallen into
a restless sleep less than an hour ago.  As Riley’s moans grew in volume, I sat
up and threw back the covers.  I was angry with him but I couldn’t lie in the
dark and listen to him suffer.

I walked quickly to the guest room and
stood by the side of the bed.  Riley had thrown off the covers and his naked
body was covered in a sheen of sweat.  He frowned and his entire body shuddered
before he lifted his hand.

“Andrea?  Oh please, no, Andrea,” he
moaned.

Goosebumps broke out on my body and I sat
down on the side of the bed before shaking him roughly.  “Riley, wake up.”

His eyes popped open and he sat up, nearly
knocking our heads together.  “Maddie!”

“It’s okay.  Just a nightmare,” I said softly
before patting his bare shoulder.  “It’s okay, Riley.”

I gasped when he threw his arms around my
waist and pulled me down on to the bed.  I sprawled across him, feeling the
rapid beat of his heart against my breast as he panted against my neck and shuddered
wildly.

I squirmed off of him and he immediately
rolled to his side, burrowing his body against mine.  I patted his back
gingerly before returning my hands to my sides.  “You’re okay, Riley.”

When his shaking had stopped and his
breathing had returned to normal, I touched his hip briefly.  “Better?”

He nodded and I tried to push away from
him.  “I’m going to go back to – “

His arms tightened around me. “No, don’t
leave me.”

“Riley, I shouldn’t – “

“I’m sorry,” he whispered against my
throat.  “I’m sorry, Mads.  Please stay with me.”

I sighed before nodding.  I didn’t have to
touch him or hold him.  I could just lay in the bed with him.  For whatever
reason, sleeping in the bed with me seemed to keep Riley’s nightmares away and
I couldn’t deny him that small comfort.

When he cupped my breast and kissed my
neck, I pushed at his chest.  “Riley, no.”

“I need you,” he mumbled.

“No, we can’t.”

“Why not?  You want me.”

He stared at my breasts, my arousal clearly
evident by my hard nipples, before leaning down and kissing one hard bud.  “Let
me make you feel good, Mads.”

“You think I’m a whore,” I said softly.

He jerked against me, his hand tightening
around my breast.  “I don’t.”

“You do,” I whispered.  “You think I’m only
using you for your dick and if I fuck you now, it will just prove you’re right.”

“I’m sorry.”  He brushed his lips against
mine in a tender caress.  “I shouldn’t have said that.  I didn’t mean it.”

I didn’t reply and he kissed my mouth
again.  “I didn’t mean it, Mads.  I swear.  I know that’s not why you’re
letting me stay with you.  I’ve just never had anyone care about me but ma, and
it’s hard for me to believe that someone like you would care about someone like
me.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”  I asked.

He sighed loudly.  “You saw the way that
guy Tim looked at me, Maddie.  Like I was a piece of dog shit smeared on his
shoe.  We come from two different worlds and I’m never going to fit into
yours.”

“You shouldn’t care what other people
think,” I said.  “I don’t.”

“Maybe you should care,” he said.  “If your
bosses found out who I was, what I did for a living – you think they wouldn’t
fire your ass?”

“You’re not that person anymore, Riley.”

“I am.”

“You’re not,” I insisted.  “People change
all the time.  You’re smarter than you give yourself credit for.  You can be or
do whatever you want.  The only thing that was stopping you before was – was
bad circumstances.”

He laughed bitterly.  “Yeah, that’s all it
was.”