Shameless (22 page)

“Nice to meet you.”  Justin held his hand
out and Riley shook it firmly.

Justin’s gaze lingered on the visible
tattoos on Riley’s neck before he said, “Head on in and start mingling.  I’d
advise you to give Mr. Triden a wide berth.  He’s already had too much to drink
and Loretta says his wandering hands are out in full force.”

He rolled his eyes and I laughed again. 
“Thanks for the tip.”

I tucked my hand into the crook of Riley’s
arm.  “Mr. Triden is one of our biggest clients.”

“Which is the only reason I invite him to
these dinners,” Justin said with a long-suffering sigh.  “I can’t tell you how
many of our female employees he’s groped at these events once he gets a few
drinks into him.  If it gets any worse, I’m firing him as a client.”

He leaned closer to me and grinned
conspiratorially.  “Just between you and me – I kind of hate these damn
dinners.  They’re so damn dull.”

I laughed as he grinned and patted me on
the arm.  He headed down the hallway and I squeezed Riley’s arm.  “Ready?”

He nodded, his tanned face was a bit pale
and he rubbed compulsively at his jaw as I led him into the room.

“Everything will be fine,” I murmured. 
“Don’t worry.”

* * *

I took a sip of wine and smiled happily.  The
dinner had gone well, much better than even I had expected.  Despite my
reassurances to Riley, I had been feeling nervous and uncertain but everything
had gone smoothly.  Riley was anxious, I knew him well enough now to see the
tell-tale signs, but no one else had picked up on it.  He had been polite, if
not a little quiet, to everyone I introduced him to and more than once I had to
suppress a giggle at the looks on my female coworker’s expressions when they
met him.  Riley was sexy in jeans and a t-shirt, in a suit he was downright
deadly. 

The guy really had no idea just how hot he was,
I mused.  Pride tingled through me.  Riley wanted me and I knew I wasn’t
imagining the envious looks my coworkers and some of the clients were giving
me. 

That’s right, ladies.  He’s all mine,
I thought with glee. 

Is he though? 

I ignored my inner voice and took another
sip of wine as I watched Riley and Justin talk animatedly in the corner of the
room.  To my surprise, the two of them were getting along extremely well.  I’d
had no idea but Justin was a motorcycle enthusiast and when he had discovered
that Riley rode one, he had immediately engaged him in a loud and enthusiastic
conversation about different types of bikes that had gone completely over my
head. 

I had wandered away after fifteen minutes,
Riley hadn’t even noticed, and chatted with a few of our clients.  I glanced at
my watch.  We had been here long enough and I figured it would be safe to say
our goodbyes.  Watching Riley in that suit, feeling his hard thigh pressed
against mine as we sat at the dinner table, and knowing that a good
three-quarters of the women in the room were lusting after him, had notched my
own lust to an almost unbearable level.  I wanted to get him home, strip away
that suit and spend the next few hours kissing and touching that deliciously
hard body.

My pelvis throbbed and I shifted, pressing
my thighs together, as I spotted Mr. Triden weaving his way toward me.

Shit!  I quickly walked toward the large
French doors to my left and slipped out on to the patio.  I glanced behind me,
sighing with relief when I saw Mr. Triden stumble to a stop as Bethany, one of
our legal assistants, crossed in front of him.  He grabbed her arm and smiled
happily at her as she smiled politely and took a step back.

Sorry, Bethany
, I thought before smiling at the couple standing at the far end of
the stone patio.  They nodded to me and, holding hands, crossed the patio and
stepped inside the room.  The doors closed behind them, muting the chatter of
voices, and I took a deep breath of the cool night air.  It was a bit chilly
and I wrapped my arm around my torso.  I would finish my wine, take Riley home
and ride him like a pony.  I grinned to myself.  God, I was insatiable when it
came to sex with Riley.  We’d hit the ninety-seven sex mark by next month if we
kept up our current pace.

Next month?  Who says Riley will even be
in your life next month.  He has a job now and if you don’t think he’s going to
look for his own place, you’re fooling yourself.  What’s happening between you
isn’t going to last forever.  Sooner or later, he’ll get tired of you.

I grimaced as the doors opened and a blast
of warm air rushed by me.

“You’ve been avoiding me, Maddie.”

I smiled stiffly at Tim.  “I haven’t been. 
Just visiting with clients.  It is a client appreciation dinner, remember?”

“I remember,” Tim said. 

I suppressed my groan when he stood next to
me and the scent of whiskey enveloped me.

“How much have you had to drink tonight?” 
I asked.  I shuffled a step sideways, frowning when Tim followed me.

He shrugged.  “Probably too much.”

“Maybe you should stop then,” I said. 
“Whiskey probably isn’t the healthiest for your body.”  I tried to keep my
voice light.  For some reason, I felt nervous and unsettled.  Tim’s usual cheerful
smile was gone and he was staring gravely at me.

“Are you and your roommate a thing?”

“Why are you asking?”  I said.

“You know why, Maddie,” Tim said before
running his fingers down my arm.

“No, I’m afraid I don’t,” I said tightly. 
“My personal life isn’t any of your business, Tim.”

“I like you, Maddie,” he said suddenly.  “I
want to get to know you on a more personal level.”

“No, thank you,” I said.  “I’m not
interested in dating someone who thinks my ass is too big.”

He laughed.  “I don’t think it’s too big. 
I just think you could learn to eat a little healthier and really maximize your
potential.  You’ve got a great body underneath the, uh, chub, and I think you’d
be much happier if you let me help you discover it.”

“Are you kidding me?” I scoffed.  “Tim, if
this is you trying to compliment me, you really need to work on your game.”

He sighed and drained the rest of his
whiskey before setting the glass on the table next to us.  “Maddie, what’s
wrong with wanting to help you live up to your potential?”

“Live up to my potential or mold me into
what you want?”  I said with a raised eyebrow.  “I appreciate your,” I paused,
“determination to make me think I’m lacking but I don’t need that type of
negativity in my life.”

He gave me a look of surprise.  “Negativity? 
Maddie, you’re reading me all wrong.”

“No, I don’t think I am,” I said.  “Excuse
me, Tim.”

He grabbed my arm and pulled me against
him.  “Don’t leave yet.  Let me show you what I can do for you, how I can make
you feel, okay?”

He bent his head and I jerked mine back. 
“Stop it, Tim.  You’re drunk and making a fool of yourself.  Go home and sleep
it off.”

He shook his head.  His eyes were bloodshot
and slightly out of focus.  “I’m fine.  Kiss me, Maddie.”

“Not a chance,” I snapped.  I could see some
of our clients glancing at us through the glass doors and I forced a polite
smile for their benefit.  “Let go before you embarrass the both of us in front
of our clients.”

He pulled me closer in response and I was
just getting ready to knee him in the groin, clients be damned, when the doors
flew open and Riley appeared on the patio.  The look of rage on his face scared
me badly and I held my hand toward him.

“Riley, wait – “

Ignoring me, he grabbed the back of Tim’s
suit and tore him away.  I stumbled back as Riley fisted his hands in Tim’s
shirt and dragged him forward.  “Stay the fuck away from her or I’ll break your
arm, you fucking shithead.”

“Get your hands off of me!”  Tim shouted.

“Riley, let him go,” I said frantically as
clients and coworkers, drawn by Tim’s shout, gathered around the doors.

Riley released Tim, his nostrils were
flaring and his eyes were flashing with anger, before snarling, “I mean it. 
Keep your fucking hands away from her.”

“You think I’m afraid of you?”  Tim
sneered.  He weaved a little and straightened his suit before glaring at
Riley.  “I know guys like you.  You think you’re tough, think that everyone’s
afraid of you, but you’re actually just scared little boys who fall apart the
minute you’re challenged by a real man.”

I actually laughed out loud.  I was
terrified and sick to my stomach over what was happening but the laughter came
braying out of me anyway. 

“You have no idea how dangerous I am,”
Riley said tightly.  “But touch Maddie again and you’ll find out.”

“Riley, let’s go.”  I swallowed down my
laughter and tugged on his arm.  “He’s drunk, okay?  It’s time to leave.”

He stared at me and I felt a tingle of
nervousness and, God help me, lust.  The Riley from the club, the one who had
claimed me in front of a roomful of men and forever changed me, was back.

Did you think he had ever actually left? 
Riley is dangerous and playing house with you for two months isn’t going to
change that.

No, I suppose it didn’t but what did it say
about me that knowing he was dangerous only made me want him more?

“Riley?”  I touched his face lightly and
soothingly.  “Take me home.”

He nodded and I breathed a sigh of relief
as he took my hand and we started toward the doors.

“That’s right,” Tim sneered behind us. 
“Run away like the scared little boy you are.  Doesn’t matter – I don’t want
her fat ass anyway.”

Riley roared angrily and I made a sharp cry
of dismay when he dropped my hand, turned and punched Tim in the face. 

“You fucking cocksucker!”  He shouted as
Tim flew backward and landed on the stone patio with a hard thud.  “I’m going
to break your fucking arm!”

“Riley!”  I lunged forward and wedged my
body between Riley’s and Tim’s.  “Stop!”

He grabbed me around the waist but before
he could lift me out of the way, I cupped his face and squeezed tightly.  “No! 
Please don’t.”

He stared over my shoulder at Tim and I
forced his gaze back to mine.  “I don’t care what he says.  Do you hear me?  We
need to walk away.”

“I’m not letting him insult you like that,”
Riley snapped.

“It doesn’t matter.  Walk away, honey. 
Please.”

When he didn’t move, I stood on my tiptoes
and pressed a kiss against his mouth.  “Please, honey.  For me.”

He stared silently at me for a moment and I
released my breath in a trembling rush when he nodded.  He took my hand again
and we turned around to see all of my coworkers and most of our clients staring
at us.

“What are you looking at?”  Riley snapped.

I squeezed his hand and pulled him through
the crowd of people.  I had to get Riley out of here before anyone said anything
else.  We were nearly to the door of the conference room when Justin called my
name.

I froze, closing my eyes, as Riley cursed
again under his breath.

“Maddie,” Justin said, “I need to talk to
you.”

“Justin, I’m sorry.  I – I didn’t mean for
this to happen.  We need to go – can I talk to you tomorrow?”

“What did Tim do?”  He asked abruptly.

I hesitated and Riley glared at me.  “He
was hitting on her.  Touching her after she told him not to.”

Justin sighed loudly and scrubbed at his
forehead before glancing behind him.  Tim was being helped inside by a few of
our other coworkers and I winced when I saw the blood pouring from his mouth.

“Fuck,” Justin said.  “Well, I guess this
is one client dinner that won’t go down as boring as hell.”

“I’m sorry, Justin,” I said as my stomach
churned with nausea.  “But it’s better if we go.  If Tim wants to file charges,
just – “

“He won’t be,” Justin said.  I stared at
him in confusion as he gave Tim an angry look.  “Go, Maddie.  I’ll call you
later.”

I nodded and pulled Riley out of the room. 

M
addie

My cell phone rang just as we were walking
into the house.  I pulled it from my bag as Riley stomped toward the bedroom. 
I took a deep breath before hitting the answer button.

“Hello, Justin.”

“Hi, Maddie.  You get home okay?”

“Yes,” I said.  I waited until I was sure
that Riley was in the bedroom before saying, “I’ll hand in my resignation first
thing tomorrow.  I really enjoyed working for you, Justin, and I just wanted to
say thank you for everything.  I’ve learned so much and I won’t - ”

“I’m not accepting your resignation,
Maddie,” Justin interrupted.

My mouth dropped open.  “You have to. 
Justin, my date punched your employee in the face in the middle of a client
appreciation dinner.  I have to quit.  I’ve embarrassed the firm, I’ve
embarrassed you and I’ve – “

“I just finished firing Tim.  If you leave,
I’ll have no one to work on the Simpson file,” Justin said.

“You fired Tim?”

“Yes.  You’re not the first coworker he’s
sexually harassed, Maddie,” Justin sighed.  “He’s done this at least three
times before, that I know of, and he’s been formally reprimanded twice for it. 
Third strike and you’re out.”

“I can’t believe this,” I said.  “Justin,
I’m not sure if it was exactly sexual harassment.  Tim was drunk and all he did
was grab my arm.”

“Obviously it was more than that or Riley
wouldn’t have felt the need to punch him in the face.”

I couldn’t believe it when Justin laughed. 
“He knocked out one of Tim’s front teeth.”

“Oh shit,” I whispered.

Justin laughed again.  “Don’t worry about
it, he deserved it.  And don’t worry about Tim filing charges against your
guy.  He won’t be.  I had a talk with him about the severity of office sexual
harassment and what it would do to his career if someone from our office
formally charged him with harassment.  After that, he was remarkably less
enthusiastic about filing charges against Riley.”

“Justin, I don’t know what to say,” I
whispered.  “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Maddie.  And don’t worry
about the clients, okay?  Apparently a surprisingly large number of our clients
like a little ‘fight club’ with their dinner.”

I groaned in dismay and Justin chuckled. 
“I mean it.  I’m thinking this might actually bring in more clients when they
find out we’re not the stuffy old law firm they think we are.”

“Thank you, Justin,” I said again. 
“Truly.”

“Don’t mention it.  I’ll see you tomorrow.”

I set my cell phone on the side table and
headed toward the bedroom.  My job was safe – the career I had worked so hard
for was intact -  so why did I feel like the hardest battle was yet to come?

When I entered the bedroom, Riley was
stuffing his clothes into a bag.

“What are you doing?”

“Leaving,” he said shortly.

“Why?”

He barked harsh laughter.  “Why?  I ruined
your fucking life, Maddie.  Have you forgotten that?”

“You haven’t,” I said.  “That was Justin on
the phone.  He was calling to tell me he fired Tim.”

Riley paused.  “He what?”

“He fired Tim.  Apparently this isn’t the
first time Tim’s been handsy with his coworkers.  Justin fired him and
convinced him not to file charges against you.”

Riley stared at me before returning to
stuffing his clothes into the bag.

“Riley, stop.  You aren’t leaving.”

“I am,” he snapped.

I stared at him, my heart breaking at the
look of shame and confusion on his face.  I hated seeing the man I loved
looking so worried and ashamed and –

Love?

Holy fuck.  I loved Riley Walker.  The
truth hit me like a damn freight train and I staggered back a little with the
force of it.  I did love him.

“This was a mistake,” he said.  “I should
never have come here.  I shouldn’t have stayed and dragged you into my
fucked-up life.”

“You haven’t,” I said.  “Riley, you’re good
for me.  I know you don’t want to believe that but you are.”

“I’m not!”  He said angrily.  “You think
you know me, Maddie, but you don’t.  I’m not a good guy.”

“Yes you are,” I said evenly.  “You’re the
best man I know.”

“Don’t say that!”  He shouted.  “I told you
– you don’t know the real me!”

“Then show me the real you,” I said.  “Tell
me who Riley Walker really is.”

“You don’t know what you’re asking,” he
said.

“I do.  Tell me, Riley.”

“Why?  What’s the point?”

“I want to know.”

My calmness seemed to make him angrier and
he threw the bag on the bed before punching the wall.  “Just let me go,
Maddie.  Please!”

“No,” I said.  “I won’t.  Tell me who you
really are, Riley.”

“Why?”  He shouted again.  “Why the fuck do
you even care who I really am?”

“Because I love you,” I said.

* * *

R
iley

My mouth dropped open and I stared like a
goddamn idiot at Maddie. 

“What?” I said hoarsely.

“I love you,” she repeated calmly. 

“No, you don’t,” I said.

She laughed.  “Yes, I do.”

“You – you can’t love me.  Women like you
don’t fall in love with guys like me.”

“Why not?’

“Because we’re too different.”

“Opposites attract,” she said.

“This isn’t just a case of opposites
attract, Maddie,” I said.  “We come from two different worlds and – “

“Yeah, you keep saying that and frankly,
I’m a little tired of hearing it,” she said.

“It’s the truth!  Have you forgotten what
happened tonight?”  I snapped.

She cocked her head.  “No, I don’t think
so.  I had some guy try to sexually harass me and you came to my defense by
knocking his teeth out.  Does that sound about right?”

“This isn’t a joke!”  I snapped again. 

She sighed.  “I know it isn’t but you’re
blowing what happened way out of proportion.”

“I almost got you fucking fired!”

“Did you not hear what I said earlier?” 
Now there was an edge of anger in her voice.  “My job is safe.  Tim was fired. 
Not me.”

“And what happens the next time I lose my
temper and try to beat the shit out of some guy who looks at you the wrong
way?”  I asked. 

She shrugged.  “Luckily, I don’t have that
many guys hitting on me so I don’t think we need to worry about it.”

I ran my hands through my hair.  “Maddie,
this – this is madness.  You don’t love me.”

“I do.  And you know what?”  She smiled at
me.  “I think you love me too.”

Fucking right we do!

Not helping!
I snarled at my inner voice. 

“I’m not a good guy,” I said again.  Even I
could hear the desperation in my voice.  “I’m really not.”

“You are.”

“I’m not!”

“Tell me why you’re not.”

“It doesn’t matter!”  I shouted.  “Why
can’t you just trust me on this?”

“Because you haven’t done anything to prove
you’re not a good guy,” she said.  “So unless you tell me why you’re not, I am
never, ever going to believe that you aren’t.  Never, Riley.  I mean that.  So
you’d better start talking or – “

“I killed my own sister!”  I shouted. 
“Does that sound like something a fucking good guy would do, Maddie?  Does it?”

Her eyes widened and her face paled.  I
immediately regretted my outburst.  I hadn’t wanted to believe that Maddie
loved me but now, knowing that I was about to watch that love die, made me want
to fucking cry and puke all at the same time.

I turned away and stared out the window
into the darkness.  Maddie would ask me to leave now.  Hell, I’d be lucky if
she let me finish packing my shit.  She’d kick me out and I’d never see her
again.  Despair washed over me.  How the fuck could I live without her?

I jumped like a fucking girl when her arms
wrapped around my waist and she pressed her warm body against my back.

“I love you,” she said quietly.  “Tell me
about Andrea.”

I opened my mouth to tell her I was leaving
and instead, said, “She was three years younger than me.  Ma said I was super
jealous of her when she was born.  I used to take her bottle and hide it behind
the couch when ma wasn’t looking.  When we got older though – I looked out for
her, you know?  She was a pretty girl and I kept the assholes away from her and
made sure she didn’t hang out with the wrong type of people.”

I sighed.  “She was always so serious, so
sad, even as a little kid.  Ma always said she overthought things.  She used to
hate it when dad and ma fought.  When we were kids and they were screaming at
each other she would sneak into my room.  I’d build us a blanket fort and tell
her stories to distract her from the screaming.”

Maddie kissed my back.  “You sound like a
great big brother.”

“I wasn’t,” I said shortly.  “After dad
left us, I thought things would get better.  They did for ma and me at least
but not Andrea.  She just seemed even more, I don’t know, withdrawn.  She did
okay at school but she didn’t have many friends.  She spent most of her time in
her room but we just thought she was - I can’t remember the word for it.”

“An introvert?”  Maddie said.

“Yeah,” I grunted.  “That’s it.  Anyway, I
had dropped out of school and started working construction but ma made sure
that Andrea graduated.  She was so proud of her.  Ma had never made it past
grade ten and she was determined that at least one of her kids would graduate
high school.  She even talked about sending Andrea to college.  She had saved
up a little bit of money and she figured Andrea could apply for student loans
but Andrea refused.  She didn’t want to go to college, she said it was a waste
of money.”

I tried to shift away from Maddie but she
refused to let me go, hugging me more tightly and rubbing my abdomen with her
warm hands.

“I moved out when I was twenty,” I said
dully.  “I was tired of taking care of ma and Andrea.  Tired of listening to
her worry about shit that was never going to change.  I moved in with friends
of mine and spent the next eight years drinking and partying and– and fucking
any woman who would open her legs for me.”

I swallowed thickly and forced myself to go
on.  “I knew Andrea was struggling.  Ma would call me and tell me how worried
she was about her but I didn’t want to hear it.  I pretended that everything
was fine, that Andrea just needed to be left alone and she would be happy, but
deep down I knew it wasn’t true.  She never moved out from ma’s house, she
never had a boyfriend, or did things that girls her age did.  She had a job as
a cashier at some convenience store but when she wasn’t working, she spent most
of the time in her room.  Ma would sometimes force her to go out with her,
shopping and shit like that, but even that was getting more and more
difficult.”

I reached for Maddie’s hand, feeling a
small amount of comfort when she linked our fingers together and held it
tightly.  “When I was twenty-eight, Andrea tried to commit suicide.”

“Oh honey,” Maddie whispered.  She kissed
my back again and hugged me tightly with her free hand.

“She slit her wrists.  Ma called me from
the hospital.  She had found Andrea in the bathtub and called 9-1-1.  She – she
nearly died from blood loss but they did a bunch of transfusions at the
hospital and it saved her life.  When she woke up the doctors had some shrink
visit her and he said she was severely depressed.  Had been for most of her
life, he said.  He recommended we – we put her in a mental hospital.  He said
she would try and kill herself again if we took her home.  Andrea didn’t want
to go but ma and me, we convinced her to go.  It was fucking expensive but ma
used the money she had saved up for Andrea for college.  It wasn’t enough.  The
doctor said she needed treatment for at least three months and the money only
covered the first month so that’s when I quit my job at the construction company
and started dealing drugs with Frank and the others.”

I closed my eyes, saw Andrea’s bloated face
with the noose around her neck, and opened them in a hurry.  “At that time, the
club was doing pretty good.  Frank and the others were making money hand-over-fist
and I made enough dealing drugs to keep Andrea in treatment for the three
months.  I didn’t want to do it, Maddie.  I didn’t even do drugs but I had no
choice, you know?”

“I do, honey,” she said quietly.

“Andrea did real well at the hospital.  She
took her meds and she went to the daily therapy. Her doctor was proud of her –
said she was making a good effort.  Ma and I visited her every Sunday and for
the first time in her life, she looked happy.  When the three months were
finished, the doctor said she was well enough to leave.  She promised ma and I
that she was doing better, that she would keep taking her meds and going to
therapy.  Only,” I paused and blinked back the hot tears that were threatening
to fall, “she was fooling us all.  She was always so smart.  Way smarter than
me.  She said and did exactly what she knew she needed to in order to leave the
hospital.”