Shattered Heart (The Hart Series) (51 page)

“Alex stop,
everyone is looking at us,” I cringe further into him. 

“So, let them. 
I don’t care anymore.  I’m transferring departments remember; taking a step
down.  I put in the request before I asked you to move in with me.” 

I shake my head
at his words.  “It doesn’t matter anymore.  You’ve made your decision.”

“You’re my
decision.  I don’t want to live without you,” his voice softens. 

“You’re not
obligated to do anything for me.”  This would be the best time to tell him, to
tell him all the lies I’ve fabricated to push him away.  To tell him how much
he hurt me by going back to the one woman who I despise.  But I can’t get the
words out.  I know I’m a coward.  We’ve already determined this when I ran out
on him in New York.  Nothing ever changes. 

“I’m not doing
it out of obligation.  Open your fucking eyes!  I love you, Elyssa.  You are my
everything and I’ll do whatever it takes to be with you.”  I break down, knee
buckling and all.  Alex doesn’t let me fall and pulls me tighter against him,
walking us both outside.  Leading us to a small table, he sits down on one of
the metal chairs and brings me in closer.  It’s cold, but all I can feel is his
warmth as he pulls me into his lap.

I push against
him, struggling to stand on my own.  “I don’t think there’s anything left to
give you.  I love you, but right now, love isn’t enough.”

“It is enough,
Elyssa.  I love you and you know that means something.  I’ve been going out of
my mind this past week.  It has literally been the worst week of my life. 
Worse than the month I was in New York.”

“How so?”  I
don’t believe him.  How could I when there’s evidence to the contrary?  No, he
thinks he missed me, he thinks he loves me, but really…what does he even know
of love.

“I’m not going
to lie, when I was in New York, it hurt.  But it’s nothing compared to how I
feel now.  You gave me a peek into what I want my future to look like.  What I
want our family to look like, Hart.  The prospect of having a family, of taking
care of you, you taking care of me.  Finally having the family that I’ve always
wanted, but never thought I deserved.” 

Shaking his
head, he loosens his grip just enough for me to pull away to stand.  Grasping
for me, he continues and breaks my heart even further.  “You took all of that
away.  Tell me, Elyssa, what do you do when the one you love takes away your
future?  I’ll tell you.  Your heart gives up because there’s nothing left to
live for.” 

No. No. No.  He
doesn’t get to hurt like this.  Not the way he hurt me.  I lash out at him with
as much venom in my voice as I can muster.  “Is that why you slept with
Arianna?”  The words leave my mouth before I even have a chance to stop
myself.  Each word full of hatred.  For Alex.  For Arianna.  For the past.  For
ruining my future. 

Alex looks at me
with confusion and tries to move closer.  I don’t allow him, with each step he
moves forward, I back away. “I don’t know where this is coming from, but
Elyssa, I haven’t slept with her since you first came into my life.”  Pain
etches each feature on his ruined face.

“Don’t fucking
lie to me, Alex.  I saw the pictures.” 

“Pictures?”  He
shakes his head, “What are you talking about?”

“You sure you
don’t know?  At this point I wouldn’t be surprised if you were all in on this
sick little joke.” 

Alex takes a
calculating step forward, and I have nowhere else to go.  I’m backed into the
brick wall and he knows he has me.  Again, not feeling so safe here.  “Elyssa,
I’m going to only say it one more time.  What the fuck are you talking about?”

Fine.  “Cole. 
He came to me last night and told me your sick little girlfriend had him
following me for the past month.  But tables were turned and while I was out of
town last weekend, he followed you.  He has pictures of you.  With Arianna. 
Naked, Alex.  You were fucking naked with the one person that has ripped
everything away from me.  From us.”

“Hart, I swear I
didn’t sleep with anyone.  I spent that entire weekend drunk off my ass.”

“Think long and
hard Alex, because I’ve seen them.  That picture is burned into my mind.  I
can’t escape it.” 

He runs his
hands through his hair before settling them on the back of his neck.  “Hart, I
swear.  I don’t remember anything.  I blacked out.  I don’t know what
happened.  I just kept drinking and drinking until I couldn’t see your face
anymore.  Until I didn’t have to picture what you were doing out of town with
him
.”

I weep quietly
as Alex kneels in front of me.  Unshed tears pool is his eyes as he looks up at
me.  His firm conviction he did nothing wrong has me wanting to believe him.  I
don’t know what to do. 
Ely now…tell him now.

“God, you’re
fucking pathetic.  I don’t know what I ever saw in you.”  Both of us turn our heads
and our attention moves to the figure stepping into the light.  Out of the
darkness my nightmare comes to life.  Dressed in a blood red floor length gown
that hugs every inch of her body Arianna steps forward with her hands fisted at
her sides.  Her hair pulled into a tight bun, causing her already tight
features to stretch even further.  I’d say she looks beautiful if it wasn’t for
the psychotic wide-eye expression on her face.

Alex stands, his
hands fisted at his sides as he pulls me behind him.  “What do you want
Arianna?” Alex’s voice is laced with venom. 

She saunters
closer, reaching out to brush her fingers over the lapel of his jacket.  “What
ever do you mean lover?” 

“Don’t call me
that,” he growls.  “We haven’t been together in a very long time, Arianna, and
you know damn well that’s the fucking truth.”

“Oh, I guess if
last weekend constitutes a very long time, you’re right.  It has been a long
time,” she squeals with laughter.  

“What the hell
are you talking about?  I was not with you last weekend.”

“You don’t
remember?  You were drunk.  I saw you at Sandy’s bar.  You needed a ride home. 
You practically ripped my clothes off.”

Alex is shaking
his head in disbelief.  “No, there is no way I would have done that.”

“You did.  We
did.”  Her eyes dart to look over his shoulder at where I’m standing.  “And
you…I warned you not to think you were special.  You had this stupid fairy tale
all made up in your head.  Didn’t I tell you he’d come back to me?”  Her wicked
smile is directed at me and I can’t look away.  As much as I hate this woman,
hate her with the fiery passions of hell, I can’t look away.

“I don’t believe
you.  There’s no way I would have touched anyone.  Let alone you.”  Alex turns
to me, eyes pleading, “You have to believe me.”

I shake my
head.  “There are pictures, Alex.  There’s too much proof not to.”  Head still
shaking, I decide to settle this now.  “You were fucking naked with her in your
bed, Alex.  You had sex with her.  Just face it!”

 Alex grits his
teeth, throwing his arms in the air in frustration.  “Goddamnit!”  He screams
into the air.  Luckily we are alone outside.  Unluckily, Arianna is practically
having an orgasm watching him.

“You’re just
like your mother.  Pathetic.  Even when your men are fucking other women, you
still take them back, licking up the leftovers after they’ve been with me.” 

Her words reach
into the depths of the darkness I feel and ignite the anger I’ve felt for the
past twenty-four hours.  I push past Alex, nudging my finger into Arianna’s
boney chest.

“You!  You
stupid bitch!  I’m done with your fucking games.  You had Cole following me,
for what reason?  To know if I was with Alex.  He. Doesn’t. Want. You!  No one
ever wanted you.  You’re the one that’s pathetic.  The problem is you want
everyone else’s life, but you’re stuck in your own miserable existence. 

“I’m done with
you intimidating me.  You will stay the fuck away from me.  You will stay away
from my family or so help me God I will make you regret the day you were ever
born!”  I push against her chest, anger radiating through my pores.  I’m
shaking.

“You have no
power to make threats.  I own you.  Just like I own him.”  She points to Alex,
seething behind me.  “Just like I own your precious little Cole.  Don’t push me
little girl, because when I push back, you’ll regret the day I entered your
life.  Not only will I ruin your life, and you know I can, but I will destroy
the lives of those you love.  Mark my fucking words, Elyssa.” 

My hand fists
and right when I bring my arm back to pummel her to the ground, another hand
rams into Arianna’s cheek causing her to fall backwards with a loud yelp.  I
glance to my left and see my sister whose entire face is red with anger.

“That’s for my
Mother, you fucking bitch.  Because she was more of a lady than I am and would
never have put you on your ass which is where you belong.”  Rachel steps
forward, her foot stomping on Arianna’s hand splayed on the ground.  “That is
for my sister.  You better stay the fuck away from her.  You hear me?” 
Rachel’s teeth are gritted as she stares at Arianna quivering on the ground.

Arianna’s
maniacal laugh sears through the bitter cold.  “She works for me.  I own her.”

“You don’t own
shit, Arianna.  There is nothing in this life you can take away from me
anymore.  Not now, not ever.  You deserve every piece of shit that comes your
way.  I fucking quit!” I scream from behind Rachel, my body vibrating with
nervous energy.

“You think
you’ll get away with this.  I am Arianna Salerno and nothing touches me. 
Rachel, be ready because I’m going to have you arrested for assault.”

“Go right
ahead.  A stay in jail is well worth the satisfaction I just got.  It’s been a
long time coming.”  Rachel grabs my hand, pulling me behind her away from
Arianna who incidentally is still laying flat against the ground.

A slew of
nervous energy feeds my momentum as Rachel and I move through the crowd inside
of the banquet hall and through the double doors I came in.  She did it; she
knocked Arianna on her ass.  Boom!  Bitch goes down!  Rachel is like Mike
Tyson, minus the ear biting shit. 

Although I’m
ecstatic that Arianna got served a dose of whoop ass, I can’t help and wonder
if her threats will come to fruition. What if she does press charges?  Rachel
looks horrible in orange and I although she is feisty, I can’t imagine her
being in prison.  Rachel definitely didn’t think this through.

I pull back
against her arm, stopping us in front of the casino.

“You just hit
her!”  Rachel tilts her head sideways as if I just told her the sky is blue.

“Uh yah, she
deserved it.”  She huffs as she grabs my arm, pulling me to her car.  “I can’t
believe that manipulative bitch.”

Rachel’s rants
are halted by Alex’s booming voice behind us.  “What was that back there?”  I
ignore him and continue to hurry behind Rachel.  “Where are you going?  We’re
not done.”  Alex pulls on my elbow.  I twirl around still vibrating with anger
and adrenaline.

“We are so
done.  Go back to your fuck buddy.”  I point to the double doors still trying
to edge my way to Rachel’s car.  My sister is now standing with her door open
watching our standoff.  She widens her eyes as I look at her, pushing me to
take it easy on him.

Backing away,
Alex runs his hands through his hair in frustration.

“You’re mad at
me?”  He points his thumb towards his chest.  “You broke up with me.  You told
me you’re having some other man’s baby days after you told me the baby was
mine.  That you were both mine.  I was drunk, I don’t remember.  You don’t have
a fucking leg to stand on when it comes to this.  You don’t deserve…”

“I know!  You
don’t think that I realize that I caused all of this!  You don’t think that I
know that!  It doesn’t make it any easier, Alex.  And now I’m jobless,
homeless, and pregnant!  This is not the most ideal situation.  So I know what I
deserve and what I don’t deserve.  I don’t need you to remind me.”  I wrap my
arms around myself before pivoting to walk towards the car.

Alex stops me,
pulling me against his chest, my back to his front, as he wraps his arms around
me.  “Why didn’t you tell me everything that was going on…with Arianna…with
Cole?”  His voice is soft.

  “I was trying
to protect you.  She would have ruined you, Alex.”

“That’s the
thing.  In a relationship, you protect each other.  You don’t leave someone in
the dark until everything has gone to shit.”

I turn in his
arms looking up at his darkened face.  “So now you know.  You know all the
fucked up truth that I’ve been hiding from you for the past couple of months. 
You know why I fought against being with you so hard.  Why I ignored you in New
York.  You know it all.”

“I don’t think
you’ve told me everything.”  Alex’s fingers brush against my chin, forcing me
to keep eye contact.  “You’re still keeping something from me.”

I shake my head,
my eyes fluttering closed as I search for the courage to rock his boat again. 
“I-I don’t know how to say it.”  I swallow back the nerves jumbled in my
stomach as I look into his blue irises which are darkened by the shadow of
night.  I don’t know what it is about us in parking lots and pregnancy
discussions.