Signs of Love (16 page)

"Uh...I'm not part of the company." She felt a little stupid pointing out the obvious.

"It's open to family and friends of the employees and the people who are involved in BlackThorpe's wounded veterans program. I thought maybe Caden would enjoy it. From what I hear, they'll have lots of fun things like those inflated slides and bouncy houses along with some games and lots of food. There's also fireworks at the end of the evening."

"When is it?"

"Tomorrow. I realize it's kind of short notice, but Melanie got on me again today about inviting people. Beth and Dan have said they'd come, so if you need a ride, they can give you one, and Beth said you're welcome to stay the night since the fireworks will likely run late."

Alana moved her cart to the side of the aisle so she was out of the way of the other shoppers. "I don't know..."

There was a beat of silence on the other end of the line before Justin said, "Well, consider yourself invited. If you decide to come, just give Beth a call about getting a ride. The picnic starts at four and the fireworks will be around nine o'clock."

"Okay. I'll think about it. Thank you for the invitation."

"You're welcome. Hope to see you there."

After Justin had ended the call, Alana tucked the phone back into her pocket. He was right, of course. Caden would absolutely love something like that. And it didn't mean Justin would be hanging around with them just because he'd invited them. She wasn't sure she'd be able to handle that without having even more of her emotions get tangled up where he was concerned.

Maybe it would be better—safer—to turn down the invitation. Caden wouldn't know. And given that he'd just been to the Mall of America, it wasn't like he hadn't done anything fun. Yeah, it would be better if she just passed on it.

Alana looked down at her list and pushed her cart forward.

Oh, who was she kidding? There was no way she wouldn't accept Justin's invite. Having accepted that truth, Alana found herself finishing off her shopping with a knot of excitement in her stomach. By the time she got back to the apartment with her groceries, she'd gone back and forth several times, but each time her heart got the better of her. Not just because she really did want to see Justin again, but because it was something that would bring Caden joy.

After she had put away her purchases, Alana sat down at the table and called Beth. As expected, the woman was thrilled that she planned to join them at the picnic. They made arrangements for Alana and Caden to meet them at their house at three the next afternoon. She also accepted Beth's invitation to spend the night and go with them to church the next morning.

Now that she'd locked herself into that, she only had one more thing to figure out. What was she going to wear?

~*~*~

The flow of people through the gates of the compound made Justin uneasy. Usually, things were locked down pretty tight, so having it this open didn't make sense to him. He stood next to Melanie Thorpe, arms crossed, watching the groups of people approach the sign-in table where their names were matched against the ones provided by employees.

"Justin." Melanie jabbed her elbow into his ribs. "Stop scowling. You're going to scare off the kids."

He glanced down at her, not bothering to change his expression. "This really is ridiculous. What were Alex and Marc thinking?"

Melanie grinned at him. "Well, to be honest, it was more me and Adrianne who broached the idea with them."

"What on earth did you do that for? Doesn't this strike you as a bit of a security nightmare? Did you vet all the people who said they were coming?"

"We thought it might keep the morale high among the employees. And it's not like they have access to top secret information here. All buildings remain secure and there are clear boundaries marked to keep people within the area we've set up for the picnic."

Justin scoffed. "Like that's going to keep someone from ducking past them and doing some exploring."

Melanie patted his arm. "It will be fine, but I give you permission to say you told me so if this goes south."

Before Justin could respond, he felt something attach itself to his lower leg. Looking down, he spotted Genevieve hugging him. A grin chased the scowl from his face as he bent down to scoop her up.

"Who is this cutie?" Melanie asked as she reached out to touch Genevieve's curls.

"This is my niece, Genevieve," he said as Beth and Dan walked up with Alana and Caden. He hoped his happiness at seeing the two of them with his sister didn't show too much on his face. "And this is my sister, Beth and her husband, Dan. This is Melanie Thorpe. The apparent mastermind behind the mayhem today."

"It's a pleasure to meet you." Melanie held out her hand and greeted them with a wide smile. "I'm already discovering a big upside to this picnic, Justin. I'm meeting members of your family I never knew existed."

He looked past Beth and Dan to where Alana stood with her arm around Caden. Her gaze was on Melanie, but Caden's was on him and the boy gave him a wave. When Justin gestured with his hand, the boy darted away from Alana's side to stand next to him, a big grin on his face. His green eyes—so much like his mother's—sparkled with excitement.  Alana followed a little more slowly, and Justin could read her unease in the tension around her mouth and eyes and the way she held her hands clenched in front of her.

He noticed the pair of jeans she wore fit her better than anything he'd seen her in so far, but her arms were still covered by the see-through long-sleeved blouse she wore over a pink tank top. And for the first time that he could remember, her hair was down. And it was long—longer than he would have imagined—and curly. He shoved his hands into his pockets when they itched to touch her hair to see if it felt as silky as it looked.

“Melanie, this is Alana and her son, Caden." Justin rested his hand on Caden's shoulder. "They're family friends."

He could see the curiosity on Melanie's face as she studied them. She held out her hand to Caden and waited until he slipped his into it. "Nice to meet you, Caden."

Caden glanced at his mother and Alana moved to stand next to him. She quickly spelled out what Justin assumed was Melanie's name. He had only just begun to learn the alphabet, but the motions she made with her hand looked familiar.

When Melanie shot him a wide-eyed look, Justin said, "Caden is deaf."

It wasn't often something caught Melanie off-guard, but she quickly regained her composure and held out her hand to Alana. "It's nice to meet you, Alana."

A small smile lifted the corners of Alana's mouth. "You too."

"There's a lot of fun stuff for kids Caden's age." Melanie motioned with her hand towards to the picnic area. "I saw Lucas and Brooke arrive a little while ago. You should introduce Caden to Danny."

"That's a good idea," Justin said as Dan took Genevieve from him and got her settled into the stroller he'd been pushing. He gave Melanie another hard look. "But I still think the whole picnic thing is the opposite of a good idea."

This time Melanie reached up and patted his cheek. "Relax. You might actually enjoy yourself." She gave a little wave to the rest of the group. "I'm going to go make sure everyone is doing their job. Have a good time."

As Melanie walked away, Justin gazed across the crowd in search of Lucas Hamilton and his family. When he didn't immediately spot them, he turned back and said, "Why don't we wander around and see what sort of stuff they've got for the kids?"

Justin had barely taken a step when a small hand slipped into his. Looking down, he saw Caden standing at his side, his eyes wide as he took in all the people and activity ahead of them. Tightening his grasp on the boy's hand, Justin moved toward where they had set up some activities for kids.

He glanced over his shoulder and saw that Alana had fallen in step with Beth. She didn't look nearly as happy or excited to be there as her son was. Though he'd known she'd likely accept his invitation for Caden's sake, Justin had hoped she would enjoy herself as well. Hopefully, as the afternoon wore on she'd relax.

~*~*~

This was a mistake
.

Though Alana figured Beth would have mentioned if Justin had gotten a girlfriend in the past few days, seeing him with the beautiful blonde was still a harsh reminder that at some point, he just might. She told herself the sadness she felt was for Caden. When he'd slid his hand into Justin's, she'd held her breath, wondering how Justin would react. Though Caden hadn't come right out and said it, Alana knew from a few subtle things he'd mentioned that he really wanted Justin in his life more. If Justin had a girlfriend, Caden wasn't likely to get that wish.

She saw that Justin had shortened his strides so Caden could keep up with him as they crossed the grass together. For too long she'd convinced herself that Caden was just fine without a father. Unfortunately, Caden's actions showed that he was craving a male influence in his life. And not just any male, but Justin. Though he seemed to enjoy being around Daniel, he'd never reacted to him the way he had to Justin.

"Hey, guys."

Justin's greeting drew Alana from her thoughts and onto the group of people he'd stopped beside. She recognized a couple of the men from her first visit to BlackThorpe.

"Hey, man. How's it going? I see you got my buddy with you again." 

Than dropped down to Caden's level and signed to him. Caden pulled his hand from Justin's to reply but even though Than was engaging him in conversation, Alana noticed that Caden didn't move from Justin's side. 

As Than and Caden talked, Justin introduced them like he had with Melanie. Then he motioned to a pretty woman with straight brown hair and a friendly smile. "By the way, Alana, this is Lindsay, who just recently put Than out of his misery and agreed to be his girlfriend."

"I just had to wait until I was sure the line had disappeared." Snickers sounded around the group as Lindsay grinned.

With a smile, Justin drew her attention to another familiar face. "Beside Eric over there is his wife, Staci and their daughter, Sarah. And this is Eric's sister, Brooke, who is married to Lucas and their son, Danny. Lucas is Lindsay's brother." He laid his hand on the shoulder of the man next to him who held the hand of a woman who appeared to have dwarfism. "This is Trent and his fiancée, Victoria, another of Eric's sisters. They're just keeping it all in the family here at BlackThorpe."

Alana noticed the young boy Justin had introduced as Danny had approached Than and was watching his conversation with Caden intently. The little girl—Sarah—also moved toward him and slid her hand into Danny's. Quickly reviewing the relationships Justin had just explained, Alana realized that the two of them would be cousins. She saw the affection on Danny's face as he glanced at Sarah before turning his attention back to Than and Caden.

There was no missing the curiosity of the group as they shook hands with her. Alana stayed close to Beth. Everyone seemed very friendly, but she found it hard to think of things to say even though Beth was chatting easily with Lindsay.

"Hey, why don't I take the boys to the slide," Than suggested. He looked at Alana. "Would that be okay? I'll be able to translate if Caden needs it."

"Sure. That would be great. Thanks." She quickly signed to Caden what Than had suggested and that she had given her permission.

Than flashed Alana a smile before taking Lindsay's hand and then reaching for Caden's. Danny took his aunt's other hand and the four of them set off together. Sarah seemed a bit upset at being abandoned but then she spotted Genevieve and made a beeline for the stroller. Beth squatted down next to the girl and told her Genevieve's name and answered the questions Sarah had about her. Staci moved to stand with her daughter and began to chat with Beth.

Alana took a deep breath and let it out, trying to ease the tension in her body. There was a longing growing in her for something like this. A group of friends. An easy camaraderie. A sense of belonging. But there wasn't a place for her here. Justin belonged because he worked with these people and, if his current conversation with Trent was any indication, they were also his friends. As his family, Beth and Daniel also fit in easily. Daniel chatted with Eric and Lucas like they were old friends even though Justin's introduction made it clear they had just met.

A gentle touch on her arm drew her attention, and she looked over to see Victoria at her side. The woman gave her a friendly smile. "So have you known Justin long?"

CHAPTER TWELVE

"No. Only a few weeks. I originally met Beth and Daniel since we go to the same church. I've been helping them with...some stuff, and I met Justin as a result of that."

"He's a great guy," Victoria said, her gaze going to where her fiancée stood talking to him. "Your son seems to sense that as well."

Alana nodded. "Ever since Caden saw him with his guns, he's decided Justin is his hero."

"Couldn't ask for a much better hero, if you ask me," Victoria said. "He helped me learn to shoot a while back. Never once told me I couldn't do it because of my size. He and Trent just figured out the best way to make it work for me and then let me go to town. He's a good man."

As she listened to Victoria talk Justin up, Alana wondered what she was trying to accomplish. It wasn't as if Alana needed to hear all about Justin's good points. She knew a lot of them already, but his life didn't have room for an instant family, so it really didn't matter what she felt about Justin. He wasn't the man for her.

"It seems most the men I've met who work for BlackThorpe are good men," Alana said, trying to move the conversation away from Justin.

Victoria grinned. "Well, I'd have to agree since I'm engaged to one and related to another."

"Have you set a wedding date?" Alana asked.

"Yep. It took us awhile, but we finally decided on one." Victoria tilted her head, her eyes suddenly sparkling. "You should come. You could be Justin's plus one."

Alana was sure her eyes widened significantly at that remark. No subtly at all there. "Um...wouldn't it be up to Justin to invite a date? He might already have someone in mind."

Victoria shrugged. "I doubt that, but if it will make you feel better, I'll ask him about it just to be sure."

Alana held up her hand. "No. No, that's okay. We don't really have that sort of relationship. It's more of a teacher-student kind of thing."

"Really?" Curiosity bloomed across Victoria's face. "So who's the teacher and who's the student?"

Alana glanced toward where Than had taken Caden before answering. When she spotted her son's curly mop, she looked back at Victoria. "We kind of both are. I'm teaching him sign language, and he's teaching me self-defense."

"Sign language? Why is Justin learning sign language?"

Not sure if it was her place to say anything about Genevieve, Alana just said, "Someone close to him is hearing impaired, and he wanted to make sure he was able to communicate with them. I'm also teaching his sister and her family."

"Has your son been deaf since birth?" Victoria asked.

Alana told her a bit about Caden's deafness and then they shared stories of trying to navigate in the world with something that set them apart from most others. She found herself relaxing the more they chatted. Victoria was easy to talk with, and Alana was glad she didn't try to bring Justin up again.

A light touch on her back startled Alana, and she looked up to see Justin beside her, his head bent down. "Should we go see what Caden is up to?"

Alana glanced around and saw that the others in the group had begun to move in the direction Than had taken Caden and Danny.  Trent took Victoria's hand and after she shot Alana a mischievous smile, Victoria began to walk away, tugging on Trent's hand.

With a nod of her head, Alana followed them, acutely aware of Justin at her side. It had been her plan to stick close to Beth and not get into situations with Justin that fueled the fire of emotions within her. As they neared the large inflated slide, a couple of kids dashed past, bumping into her in their apparent eagerness to get to their destination. Alana stumbled as she took a step to the side which brought her right up against Justin. This time his touch wasn't light as he laid an arm across her back and his hand came to rest on her hip, keeping her on her feet.

"Sorry." The word slipped out as she quickly stepped away from him. His hand slid from her side without any further attempt to hold her. "Guess they were in a hurry to get to the slide."

"Yep, seems so." Justin's voice was steady. "It looks like Caden and Danny are having fun on it."

They stopped next to Than and Lindsay, who stood at the foot of the slide looking up.

"C'mon, boys!" Than yelled up to them then motioned with his hand.

Alana noticed Caden and Danny were each seated on one of the dual slides and after a glance at each other, they pushed off and slid down to the bottom. As they climbed off, they high-fived each other. Spotting her, Caden ran to where she stood with Justin, his cheeks flushed and his eyes bright with excitement.

It's so much fun! Can I keep going with Danny?

Alana nodded.
As long as it's okay with his parents
.

Caden's gaze darted to Justin then back to her.
Can you tell Justin thank you for inviting us?

I will
. She'd no sooner finished the signs when he darted away again to where Danny waited for him at the steps that led to the top of the slide.

Alana took a deep breath, the scent she'd come to associate with Justin alerting her to how near her he was. She turned to look at him. "Caden wanted me to tell you thank you for inviting him today. He's having a great time."

A quick smile transformed his face as his blue eyes warmed. "I'm glad. I wasn't sure it was a good idea to have something like this, but seeing Caden having fun makes it all worthwhile."

Alana nodded her agreement as she watched the boys climb up the stairs. It had been awhile since she'd last seen Caden having so much fun. And she was very thankful that Danny had taken Caden under his wing. "Danny seems like a neat kid."

"He is." This pronouncement came from Lindsay. "I'm his aunt, so one might think I'm biased but honestly, he just an all-around terrific kid. Made me rethink the whole 'not having kids' thing."

"I'm sure Than was glad to hear that," Justin said, his gaze going to the man at Lindsay's side.

Than laughed. "Well, I would have taken her regardless, but yes, I was glad to hear that." He slid an arm around Lindsay's waist and tucked her into his side. Lindsay laid her hand on his chest as she leaned her head against his shoulder.

Alana stared at them, wondering what it would be like to be in a relationship where affection came so easily. She hadn't seen it in her parents' marriage, and it certainly hadn't been present in her relationship with Craig.

It was the confidence Lindsay and Than had in each other that Alana found most intriguing. Than had reached for Lindsay with a confidence that said he knew she wouldn't reject his advances. Alana had never been confident enough in anyone's feelings for her to approach them like that. Except for Caden. She knew he'd never rebuff her affection, but would she ever be able to feel that way about anyone else? A man? Like Justin?

Alana pushed aside her thoughts. Being around Justin like this was putting too many things into her mind. She needed to just concentrate on Caden and the fun he was having. Today was about him. Not about her screwed up past. Not the longings in her heart. No, it was about Caden being able to just be a little boy doing fun things.

She crossed her arms over her torso as she watched Caden go up and down the slide a couple more times. Eventually, Lucas stepped toward the slide as Danny and Caden reached the bottom. The tall man waved the boys over. Reluctantly, they abandoned the slide and made their way to Lucas. Before Alana could move, Than slid his arm from around Lindsay and walked over to join Lucas and the boys. She saw him signing to Caden and then reached out to take the boy's hand.

As they walked back toward them, Alana saw that the excitement had dimmed some on Caden's face, but his gaze was darting around, no doubt looking for the next thing they would do. When he reached her, he let go of Than's hand and signed to her asking if they could go do more.

At her nod, Caden took her hand and then slid his other hand into Justin's. The corner of Than's mouth lifted as he looked at Caden and then Justin. They continued to move as a group, taking in the carnival-like setup of the event. When they came upon a booth that offered the opportunity to shoot, Caden jerked his hands free and quickly signed that he wanted to try.

"Let me guess," Justin began before Alana could say anything, "he wants to have a go at the shooting game."

She nodded. "Yeah, he wants to give it a try."

"Well, then let's go." He took Caden's hand then looked over at Than. "You think you can beat me, man?"

Than groaned. "Probably not, but I'll give it a whirl."

As Alana watched, Justin and Caden were joined by Danny, Than, Trent and Victoria.  She walked to where Justin and Caden stood so she could interpret for them if need be.

Justin picked up the gun and gave it to Caden. He glanced at Alana and then gave instructions on how to do it.

Do you understand?
Alana asked Caden once she finished interpreting what Justin had said. 

Alana waited for Justin to pick up a rifle, but instead, he dropped down to his knee beside Caden and put his arms around him to show him how to position the rifle and then helped him hold the gun. After Caden had fired off a couple of shots, Justin lowered his arms but still stayed on his knee, his hand on Caden's back. Than and the others had taken up their rifles and began to shoot as well.

Justin stayed with Caden for a bit and then when it was apparent he had a handle on it, he stood and picked up another free rifle.

"How's it going there, Than?" Justin called. "Shot out the star yet?"

"Shut up, man, and start putting some shots in your own star."

Alana smiled as the insults flowed between the men. Justin settled in with the rifle pressed against his shoulder and began a steady stream of shots at the small target. She moved closer to Caden and Justin to watch them. Caden's shots were a little wild and he rarely hit the target, but she could see the smile on his face as he pulled the trigger over and over. In contrast, every time Justin pulled the trigger, he hit the target.

She wasn't sure how many of the BBs they had to shoot, but by the time all was said and done, only two had managed to shoot out the red star. Justin, of course, but more surprising was that the other person was Victoria. She and Justin slapped hands in celebration.

“You've been my best student, Tori," Justin said with a grin at the woman.

Even though Caden's target showed that he'd only managed to hit it a handful of times, Alana could see the excitement coursing through him. Already, his gaze was moving toward the other games that were set up. He slipped his hand into hers and pointed to the next booth, looking up at her with a question in his eyes.

Alana noticed that Justin was still standing with his friends, so she walked with Caden to the next game. There were already several people playing it so they had to wait. As they did, she tried to explain to him what to do.

They stood for a couple of minutes before he tugged at her hand again. She looked down at him with a smile that faded when she saw the serious look on his face.

What's wrong?

Caden's brows drew together and it took him a moment then he slid his hand from hers to answer.
Can Justin be my dad?

A band wrapped around Alana's lungs and squeezed all the air from them. This was what she had been afraid of. Tears blurred her eyes, but she blinked them away as quickly as she could. She struggled to take a deep breath to ease the tightness in her chest. How did she explain this to him?

Justin is just a friend, sweetheart. Don't you like to have him as a friend?

Caden stared at her, his green eyes so full of emotion for one so young.
I love him, Mama.

The shot of pain that pierced Alana's heart had her reaching for her son as much to comfort him as to keep her balance. She hadn't expected to hear something like that from Caden, but he had never been one to hide how he felt. And the way his face lit up whenever he was around Justin should have warned her of the growing affection he had for the man.

His revelation stunned her, and she had no idea what to say. She always thought her son's first heartbreak would be because of a girl. Alana had never imagined it would be because he loved a man he wanted to call dad.

"Everything okay here?"