Solitary Man (10 page)

“You aren’t exactly in a position to babysit,” she reminded him. “Don’t you have to work?”

“I’ve given this a lot of thought. Don hired me to put a new security system in place and screen employees. The system’s been up and working for a while now. I need to do check-ins and updates, but I don’t need to work nine to five. And I can hire a housekeeper for the hours I’m out of the house.”

The room began to spin and Nikki grabbed onto the bedrail. “You do not have to plan your entire life around me. I’m perfectly capable of staying alone during the day.”

“Not in a walk-up apartment, so you can forget that idea now. Can we at least agree Janine’s place isn’t going to work?”

The thought of three flights of stairs was overwhelming now and she felt her options closing in on her. “Yes,” she admitted. “Janine’s place is out. So say I move in.” She swallowed over the lump and forced the next words from her throat. “With you.” God, how would she survive living with Kevin on a day-to-day basis? Knowing he was taking care of her because she was carrying his child? Dealing with the constant sexual awareness he generated inside her? Coping with the knowledge she cared too much about the loner ex-cop?

She shook her head. “Say I move in with you. There’s no reason you have to spend money on a housekeeper just to look out for me.”

He shrugged. “I was going to hire someone anyway.”

“Once a week, maybe. But daily…”

“Damn it, Nicole do you really have to argue every little point? Look around you. What are your options? I know I’m no prince, but I’m the best you’ve got so make the best of it, okay?” He ran a frustrated hand through his hair, and Nikki suffered a rush of shame.

She didn’t want to be a burden or an obligation, but she couldn’t change the fact that she was. Kevin would view her that way whether she liked it or not. She might not like it, but she was damn lucky she had Kevin willing to take her in. “I appreciate all you want to do for me. And yes, I’ll move in. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“But I’m not giving in on the full-time maid, so you can forget that now.”

Kevin stifled a groan. The last thing he wanted was to upset her. He respected her independence, much as she thought otherwise. To have her grovel didn’t please him or do anything for his male ego.

He’d won his most important concession. She was moving in. No need to push further. “Okay. Part-time help it is,” he said.

She raised her eyebrows. “That was almost too easy.”

“Disappointed?” he asked.

She smiled. “No. Just relieved.”

“Good.” Apparently he’d made another point then. He wouldn’t abandon her or his child. Did she believe him? He shook his head, knowing he didn’t want to delve deeply into the answer.

“Okay then. I’ll go over to Janine’s and pack up your things before coming back for you.”

She nodded.

The conversation hadn’t gone as smoothly as he’d hoped, and now wasn’t the time to bring up her other problems. The baby would be covered under his insurance, but Nikki would not. She had no coverage for any medical bills or serious problems that might yet arise. Nor did she have the money to cover the bills for the medical care both she and the baby deserved right now.

Although he’d been impressed by the clinic and its range of services, the distance between his suburban home and the city clinic wasn’t safe, should there be another emergency. Add to that the location, which made him uneasy in the first place, and Kevin thought he had a good argument for switching to a private doctor in a suburban hospital. Not that Nikki would agree.

If he could get past her pride, there was much he could offer, including paying for her pregnancy medical care—like the emergency room visit last night. The solution he had in mind, however, would probably scare the living daylights out of her, because it sure as hell rocked his world.

Marriage. Commitment. Trust. He shuddered, knowing how he ranked in that particular department. Although he’d pay for Nikki’s care regardless of whether she became his wife, the baby needed the legalities of marriage. Because then his child would have his name. And so would Nikki, from there on in. No illegitimate stigma, no complications.

He glanced over. Her eyes were still moist, her jaw clamped tight. She’d given in, but not willingly. He was the last person she wanted to turn to for anything. He didn’t blame her, but she had no choice. So yes, he’d won one battle, but he had a hunch that was nothing compared to the fight ahead.

* * *

Nikki stepped inside the front door and glanced around Kevin’s new house as if seeing it for the first time. And in a way she was. For the foreseeable future, this was her new home. Her stomach cramped and it had nothing to do with the baby. Directly in front of her was a large staircase leading to the second floor of his Victorian-style home.

“Consider the upstairs off-limits,” Kevin said, coming up behind her.

“Believe me, I wouldn’t dream of going near those steps,” she muttered.

“Good. I just wanted to make sure we were in agreement” He stood so close his warm breath tickled her neck, sending a shot of awareness throughout her body.

Whenever she was around Kevin, she burned. Nikki hoped he kept a fire extinguisher somewhere close because she had a hunch she was going to need it. She took a step forward but she still felt his solid presence behind her.

“So where’s my room?” she asked lightly, trying to minimize her feelings about setting up house with Kevin.

“Back here. Apparently this old place had a servants’ quarters off the kitchen. There’s a bedroom and full bath.”

“Good. Good.” With his bedroom upstairs, she was half a house and a full flight of stairs away from temptation.

He stepped around her, motioning for her to follow. With the soft denim molding to his thighs and the ripple of muscles beneath his old gray T-shirt Nikki would have followed him to the ends of the earth. And back.

She swallowed a moan. Boy was she in trouble.

He stopped in the family room, in front of what looked like a brand-new leather recliner. “I figured you wouldn’t want to be cooped up in a back room all day, so you can make yourself comfortable in here.”

Sunlight streamed through oblong windows around the perimeter of the room, making for a welcoming place to be. A stack of women’s magazines sat on the table beside the chair, and a large-screen television was directly in front. “This is… this is perfect Kevin, thank you.”

He shifted from foot to foot, obviously uncomfortable with her gratitude. “I stopped at the hospital gift shop,” he said, pointing to the neat pile of reading he’d left for her.

“Thanks.” If this stiltedness continued, the stress would send her right back to the hospital.

“I did a quick pack-and-run when I was in your apartment earlier. Janine said she’d come by this afternoon to visit and help you get your things put away. I didn’t think you’d want me to unpack for you.” His cheekbones were highlighted with color—embarrassment—making him appear endearing and… soft. A word and a look she’d never associated with Kevin before.

But with this offer and unexpected move into his home, she was seeing a fresh side to Kevin Manning. She had a hunch they’d be seeing new and enlightening sides to each other, for as long as this arrangement continued.

“I have to let my boss know I’m out of commission,” Nikki said, thinking of all the repercussions.

“At the risk of starting an argument, I took a chance and called over there this morning. I spoke to Jack myself. I figured you’d want to give him as much notice as possible, all things considered.”

Her gaze met his. No doubt he expected another argument. “That was thoughtful. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. I’m going to make a few calls. The remote’s on the table.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“You should get off your feet.”

She nodded and lowered herself into the comfortable chair. The leather squeaked as it molded to the contours of her body. She pushed herself back into a reclining position. Tension in her back and legs—tension she hadn’t even known she was carrying, eased immediately. She sighed aloud. “This is great”

“And you know where the bathroom is.”

“I’m not likely to forget” She laughed and he grinned in return. The unbearable tension between them had finally been broken. Nikki wondered how long the reprieve would last.

SEVEN

“I
hate being waited on.” Nikki tilted her head back and watched as the woman Kevin had hired, Eleanor Reid, cleaned off the dinner table while she did nothing but sit.

“I’m just doing my job,” Eleanor reminded her. A job she’d done well in the last week. Problem was, the job was all she did. There was no small talk or chit-chat.

Nikki figured she could either lose her mind or try to draw the older woman out. “Yeah, but I grew up on a farm. Everyone pitched in. I mean even the cows gave milk.”

It worked. The other woman cracked a smile on her professional face. Nikki waved a hand toward one of the chairs, motioning for her to sit.

Eleanor hesitated, then sat down beside Nikki at the table. “How are you feeling?” she asked finally.

After three days a week of Mrs. Reid puttering around her but never invading her personal space, Nikki was grateful she’d penetrated her shell. Nikki was lonely.

Funny, but even in college, she’d been independent. She had many friends, and a roommate, but she’d been on her own more often than not. And after Tony died, she and Janine had lived opposite schedules, which left Nikki alone during the day. She hadn’t been lonely then.

But she was now. Because for the first time she knew what it was like to live with someone—and be totally, utterly alone. Oh, Kevin was around, her constant companion when not at work, making sure she felt okay, didn’t get out of bed too often and wanted for nothing. But he was as distant as he could be with the constant awareness sizzling between them.

Perhaps because of her strong feelings for him, Nikki felt the emptiness that much more. Which made her determined not to take this confinement lying down. She had to approach the future as if it didn’t involve Kevin, and prepare both herself and her baby for that eventuality.

But she smiled at her companion. “I’m feeling okay.”

“Good, because some women would be climbing the walls after a week of bed rest.”

Nikki dropped her head to her hands, which lay on the table. “I lied. I’m not okay. I’m bored out of my mind,” she wailed. She lifted her head and grinned. “Thank you. I feel much better now.”

“When are you due?”

Her hand went to her stomach, as it automatically did each time she thought of the baby. “Early November.”

“A Scorpio. Determined little buggers with long memories. Protective of those they care about.”

“Sounds a lot like his father,” Nikki murmured. She’d begun thinking of the baby in terms of
he
, probably because she envisioned a tough little guy like Kevin.

“Mmm. Baby’s lucky to have such a caring man as a parent. Not all kids get that lucky.”

She wondered if Kevin thought of his son—or daughter—as lucky to have him for a father. Though she hadn’t planned this pregnancy, she knew
she
thought her baby was fortunate to have him around. But he’d been on a downward spiral of guilt since Tony died. If nothing else, maybe this baby would give him a positive focus.

“You’re perceptive, Mrs…. Can I call you Eleanor? I mean if we’re going to be cooped up together, the formality seems kind of silly, doesn’t it?”

“Eleanor it is.” She smiled in return. “You seem perceptive yourself, for one so young.”

Nikki shrugged. “Let’s say I’ve lived a lot in a short time.”

“Well, you and Mr. Manning seem like a nice young couple.”

They were nice, and young… but a couple? Nikki shook her head, knowing if Kevin had his way, they would never be an us.

Did he realize what the future
could
hold? What kind of family life the three of them could have,
if he opened his heart?
Shivering at the direction of her thoughts, she sought for a way to change the subject.

Eleanor did it for her. She cleared her throat. “I really should clean this mess up though, before Mr. Manning gets home.”

Nikki nodded. But she dreaded the thought of another long evening. “If you finish early… would you be interested in a game of cards?” Nikki asked. Kevin had left her a deck earlier. For Solitaire. She grimaced.

“I’m not much of a card player, but I did see a Scrabble board on the top shelf of the closet when I was cleaning.”

Nikki’s brain kicked into gear for the first time in four months. Waitressing was good for her checkbook, but the mental stimulation had been minimal. Unless she counted the numerous ways of ducking a come-on, she thought wryly. “That sounds great”

“Why don’t you rest for awhile and I’ll come get you when I’m finished in here.”

Nikki nodded. She yawned, amazed she could be tired when all she did was lounge around. With Kevin due home soon, and with him the return of tension, she might as well gather her strength while she could.

Once in her room, she lay down on the gingham checked comforter and stretched until she found a comfortable position. Her gaze fell to a small bouquet of freshly cut flowers in a vase on the dresser. A gift from Janine, they reminded her of many things. Especially the life growing inside her and the dream that she’d one day have the family she’d always wanted. She couldn’t base her future on hope.