Someone Like Her (25 page)

“Damn you, you fucking shit. Fight me.”

Jake looked into eyes turned black by rage and shook his head. “Not gonna.”

Straddled above him, Kincaid grunted his displeasure just before he reared back his arm and swung a fisted hand right at Jake’s jaw—one he saw coming a mile away and did nothing to stop.

Someone was talking to him, but the fuzzy state surrounding Jake was just too comfortable for him to respond. A hard slap across his face had him rearing up and sputtering. “What the hell?”

“Get up you piece of shit.”

Jake blinked his eyes in an attempt to focus. As his vision cleared, he saw the boss crouched on the end of the air mattress, his arms braced on his knees.

“Feel better?” Jake asked and swiped his hand across his face. When he saw blood on his hand, he ran a finger around his teeth to make sure they were all still there. A ray of bright sunshine fell on his eyes through the open flap of the tent and he squinted. How long had he been out?

Kincaid grunted. “Not yet, but I will when you make things right with Maria. Which you’re gonna do today. When she cries, I’m not happy.”

He’d made her cry? Well, of course he had. What had he expected, that he could use her, then turn nasty and mean without hurting her? That she’d understand he was doing it for her?

“I did what I thought was best for her,” he said. Saying it aloud made it sound stupid. He’d have to think about that when his head cleared and he could think again.

“You’re an ass. Get up. Let’s go swimming.”

Oh, Christ, Kincaid was going to lure him into the Gulf and drown him. Jake narrowed his eyes. “Why?”

“Cause I’m hoping a shark’ll come along and eat you. C’mon, get your lazy ass up.”

The thirty-minute swim did the job of clearing the cobwebs Maria’s brother had planted in his head. Now, as he jogged down the beach alongside the boss, Jake began to feel like he was back in SEAL training.

Since he hadn’t been devoured by a great white, maybe Kincaid planned Jake’s demise by exhaustion. The man hadn’t said a word since they’d walked into the water. Unfortunately, it had given Jake plenty of time to think. Could be that had been the plan all along.

What if Maria was pregnant? What if she wasn’t? Did it make a difference? Either way, he loved her and, bottom line, nothing else mattered.

“Do you love her?”

Startled from his thoughts by the sudden break in silence, Jake stopped and braced his hands on his knees as he tried to catch his breath. Was the boss a mind reader now? That was one hell of a scary thought.

“Your answer better be yes, or I really will kill you. And why are you breathing so hard? Christ, you’re a wuss,” Kincaid said. He turned, jogging back toward the campground.

“Asshole,” Jake called after him, straightening up and forcing his legs to start moving.

“Pussy.”

Jake gathered the last of his energy and put on a burst of speed, tackling Kincaid around his knees. “Those’re fighting words,” he rasped as they wrestled in the sand. He held his own until the boss called it a draw and Jake grinned. Damn, he’d needed a good fight to knock some sense back into his head.

“You’re grinning like an idiot, Tiger Toes. It better be because you love my sister and you finally realize how stupid you’re acting.” Playing dirty, he twisted up and dug a knee into Jake’s stomach.

“Uncle,” Jake gasped.

“I’ll interpret that as a yes to both, so you get to live another day.” Kincaid stood and offered a hand.

Jake gave the hand a wary eye before accepting help up. “I just knew you were going to do that,” he muttered when he was flipped through the air, landing belly down. Levering himself up, he brushed sand off his face.

“That detective called me last night. Fortunada wants to see her.”

What?
“No. No way. He’s put her through enough already.” Kincaid obviously wasn’t any happier about this than he was, so why did it sound like he was considering it?

“It’s not our decision to make. She doesn’t know yet, and I don’t know how she’ll react when she does. Hopefully, she’ll tell him to go to hell.”

Jake wasn’t so sure. He’d seen the longing in her eyes when she’d talked about finding her father. If nothing else, she’d want to eliminate the bastard as a possibility.

“When you going to tell her?” He really should have killed the son of a bitch.

“As soon as you pack things up here and follow me home.”

He kicked a broken shell, sending it tumbling ahead of them. “That was my plan before you let that little bomb drop. I need to see her. Try to explain.” If that was possible. Preferably, he’d never have to talk about what happened in Egypt, but he had to tell her or she’d never understand why he’d been such as ass.

Kincaid lifted his head and watched a line of pelicans fly over. “It’s not easy to live with losing a man on your watch, but it’s too damn easy to blame yourself. The guilt’s a bitch.”

“I’ll be okay.” If he kept saying it, he might believe it.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

M
aria hosed the suds off Sally, glancing up when Logan’s car turned into the driveway. She lifted her hand to wave, then dropped it when Jake pulled in behind him. Her first thought was to run inside and hide, but she’d never been a coward and wouldn’t start now. Besides, her Mustang still had soap on it and at the moment, she was fonder of it than Jake.

Why would her brother bring him here, anyway? If they had a meeting, Logan should’ve gone to K2. She went to the other side of her car, away from the sidewalk, and kept her gaze on Sally—or would have if her eyes had been kind enough to obey. Against her will, they insisted on peeking at Jake.

The way her heart pounded against her chest physically hurt. “Stupid heart,” she muttered. He’d go inside and be out of sight in a minute, and then maybe she could breathe again.
Don’t let him see you’re even aware he’s here.
Right, there was still some soap on the wheel and she’d look at that. She stared so hard at the chrome her eyes almost crossed.

“Chiquita?”

His voice sounded right behind her and she spun, hose in hand.

“Well, I was in need of a bath,” he said as water sprayed over him.

“Ha ha.”

He deserved that and more so she kept the hose aimed at him. Water dripped down his beautiful face and if his eyes appeared sad, she didn’t care. Really, she didn’t. He just stood there in his wet T-shirt, board shorts, and flip-flops as if waiting for her to say something. Turning away, she twisted the nozzle to “Off” and grabbed a soft rag to dry Sally.

When he took another rag from the pile and joined her, she said not a word. They worked in silence, him at the front and her at the back. It didn’t take long for it to occur to her that they’d meet in the middle eventually, and she’d be close enough to smell him, to feel his body heat. Even if he was in need of a bath, she’d probably still drool. She was so freaking pathetic.

Stupid tears burned her eyes, but she refused to let him see her cry. Dropping the rag, she walked away. With no destination in mind, she ended up at the path leading to the beach. Halfway down it, Jake called her name. She kept going.

“Maria,” he said again, closer.

The sand was hot on her bare feet, but she hardly noticed. Not caring that she wore cutoffs and a T-shirt, she walked into the Gulf, leaned against the breaking waves, and when she was past them, started swimming. Maybe she’d swim to Key West, adopt some of the six-toed descendants of Hemingway’s cats and screw every beach bum that crossed her path. Okay, probably not that last part. That’d be too much like Lovey Dovey.

The salt burned her eyes, a perfect excuse for the tears she couldn’t hold back. The water next to her rippled and Jake swam up beside her. She changed direction and he moved with her as if they had practiced a synchronized swimming routine. No way she could outpace a SEAL, so she turned for the beach, her unwelcome shadow at her side.

Furious that he wouldn’t leave her alone, she spun to face him. “You’re an idiot, Jake Buchanan. You’re in love with me, but you’re as stubborn as a donkey and won’t admit it, even to yourself. There’s going to come a day when you’ll want to poke your eyes out for not seeing it. And if you’re really, really lucky, it won’t be too late. In the meantime, there’s a gallon of double chocolate fudge brownie ice cream calling my name. Who knows, I might get brain freeze and forget you even exist.”

There was the barest twitch of his lips. “I freely admit that I’m a donkey, stubborn or otherwise.”

“That’s not what I meant, and you know it. But that works too.” The hint of a smile on his face, though, gave her hope that he was ready to talk. She turned to leave, praying he would stop her.

“Chiquita, please. Don’t go.”

It seemed sometimes prayers were answered. At the edge of the surf, she sat and stared at the horizon as the waves pushed sand into her cutoffs, not at all surprised when Jake settled next to her. As the silence stretched between them, she had to bite her bottom lip to keep from speaking. If she opened her mouth, she’d likely make a fool of herself by begging him to love her.

“The way I treated you was unforgivable,” he finally said.

There was a sad truth. A sand crab scurried to bury itself before the next wave and she kept her attention on it. If Jake wanted her to speak, he needed to say a lot more than that.

“I want . . . no, I need to tell you what happened in Egypt. I mean, I know you already know what happened, but I want you to understand . . . shit, I don’t even understand half of it.” He punched his heel into the sand as if he were furious with that particular spot.

“I’m listening.” She’d known losing Rick was eating at him, but he’d used his grief and guilt to build a wall between them. She could have lived with that for a while, but not with the way he’d treated her and the things he had said.

If he couldn’t share his heartaches with her, along with his joys, there was no future for them as a couple. That he sat with her now, willingly ready to talk, gave her hope. As he spoke, she drew a heart in the sand at her side where he couldn’t see, then watched as a wave washed it away.

“Tennessee panicked. I knew he was on the edge of losing it, so I put him at the end of the hall where I thought he’d be safest. He would have been safe if one idiot bad guy hadn’t needed to take a piss.”

Taking a deep breath, he continued. “All Tennessee had to do was slip around the corner and we’d never have been noticed. I guess something snapped inside him. He started screaming like some kind of wild man . . . firing his gun . . . just screaming over and over. Christ, I still hear him every time I close my eyes.”

“Go on,” she said softly and slipped her hand into his.

He brought their joined hands up and stared at them. “Between the yelling and the gunfire, the other two Tangos woke up. No surprise they had guns. Stewart and I managed to kill them, but Bayne was also shot. I ordered Stewart to get the kid out of the house and . . . and . . .”

“And what?” She didn’t even try to stop the tears running freely down her face.

“I-I held Tennessee in my arms. He begged me not to let him die, so I promised I wouldn’t even though I knew . . . God, I knew I was lying to him. The last thing he said was, ‘I don’t blame you.’ But I looked in his ey-eyes . . .” He cleared his throat. “I looked in his eyes and saw the truth. He did blame me. If he didn’t, he’d have never said that. And he was right. I should have called the operation off or at least left him behind at the safe house. He was coming apart and I knew it.”

“Now you’re afraid to sleep because you’ll see him in your dreams?” When his eyes widened as if surprised she could know this, she shrugged. “When Logan got home after Evan was killed, he would cry out in his sleep.”

Jake picked up a small piece of driftwood and sent it flying over the tops of the waves. “Yeah. I’m kind of screwed up right now, but I’m trying to work my way through it.”

“Oh, Jake.” His eyes brimmed with tears, and she straddled his lap and held him close.

Pulling her tight against him, he pressed his lips to the top of her head. “I need you, Maria. I don’t deserve you, but I can’t let you go.”

She leaned her head away and peered at him. “That’s what all this has been all about? You pushed me away because you don’t believe you deserve me?”

“I know I don’t. God knows, I tried to give you up, leave you to find a better man than me.”

“And I thought I was stupid,” she muttered.

“Hey, now. You calling me stupid?”

“If the boots are the right size, you should put them on.”

He gave a rusty-sounding little laugh. “Don’t you mean if the shoe fits?”

“Whatever.” Maria hid her smile, pleased she’d gotten him to laugh. She lifted her face, hoping to see a hint of light back in his eyes.

He glanced away, out over the water. “Yeah, whatever. That about sums it up.”

“We all make mistakes of one kind or another. Yes, this one had the worst of consequences. Thing is, you can’t undo it. That leaves you two choices. You can let it ruin your life . . . wallow in your misery because you think that’s what you deserve. Or, not only can you learn from it, but you can find a way to honor Rick’s life.”

An idea occurred to her then, something that just might help him. She’d need to make a phone call, set everything up.

A muscle twitched in his jaw. “The
thing is,
the next time I’m about to step on a plane and find out you’re in danger, I’ll do exactly what I did before. I’ll come for you. That makes me a danger to my team.”

“Do you really believe Logan wouldn’t have done the same if it had been Dani? Do you think he’s a danger to the team?” She could tell he didn’t want to answer. If he did, he’d prove her point. Gah, men were so stubborn.

Finally, “Okay, I concede your point. Happy?”

“Deliriously. Your mistake wasn’t in not leaving when you were supposed to. You gave them their instructions, and you caught up with them in plenty of time. What you didn’t do was heed your instincts where Rick was concerned. I’ll bet you everything I own you’ll never make that kind of mistake again.”

When he didn’t agree, she tried again. “Rick had to know better than even you and Logan that he wasn’t ready to go on an operation, yet he kept his mouth shut about it. I suppose he was trying to prove otherwise, to the team and himself. You know, not able to admit such a thing to all you macho, ‘I eat nails for breakfast’ dudes. But we’re responsible for ourselves first and foremost. He should never have put you in that position. That’s what I think, anyway.”

At his silence, she stabbed a finger against his chest. “Am I wrong, Tiger Toes?”

“Next time you poke at me be prepared for the consequences.”

“Whatever,” she said just before his mouth came down on hers.

Jake hadn’t dared to believe she would ever let him kiss her again. Not after the way he’d treated her. When he’d walked up Kincaid’s driveway and seen her in the sexy red top that didn’t quite reach the waist of her little denim shorts—when did she start wearing a belly ring?—with the fringe hanging down her long, tanned legs, he’d lost any hope of uttering words.

All the things he’d thought to say when seeing her had joined the blood flowing south to below his waist. Wet from washing her car, her perky nipples had poked through her shirt and he’d just stood there, like an idiot gone even dumber, and stared. He’d heard and dismissed Kincaid’s “That’s my sister you’re wanting to bang” before the boss went into his house, slamming the door behind him.

So he’d tried to show Maria he loved her by helping her dry her beloved car. When she’d walked away, he’d almost left with his tail between his legs like a kicked dog. Instead, his feet decided they should follow her. Then his mouth and brain decided they should team up and speak his shame.

He was so messed up, but he was kissing her, and she was letting him, and there was someone tapping on his shoulder.

“Hey, take it somewhere else. My kids aren’t old enough for a birds and bees talk, but they are old enough to be fascinated by what’s going on here.”

Jake glanced over his shoulder to see a boy and girl staring at him and Maria. Something to remember—Maria had the ability to make him forget his surroundings. He’d been mere seconds away from laying her down in the surf and proving to her that she belonged to him.

“Sorry,” he said. “I just told her I loved her and things got a little out of hand.”

The man’s eyes flicked to Maria with more appreciation than Jake cared for. “Can’t say I blame you. The wife, she made me come over, but seriously, man, from what I’ve seen, a room’s in order.”

“I’m so embarrassed,” Maria whispered from where she had her nose buried close to his ear. “Did you just say you loved me?”

Well, he had, but it wasn’t how he’d wanted to. There were supposed to be flowers, an expensive dinner, maybe a two-hundred-dollar bottle of wine, and a moonlight stroll.

He tugged her face away from his neck so she’d look at him. “You weren’t meant to hear that.”

“You don’t love me?”

The hurt in her eyes tore at him and he almost caved. But dammit, he had something special planned. “I didn’t say that.” He stood and pulled her up. “I want to ask you out on a date. Saturday night. If you want to find out if I love you, you only have to say yes.” This was it. She’d either agree or tell him to go to hell.

“That’s four days away.”

Her impatience made him smile. “I know, but I promise it’ll be worth waiting for.” First, there was something else she had to decide before he talked about love and marriage, not to mention the possibility of a baby.

“Doesn’t sound like I have a choice.” After giving him an irritated little scowl, she turned to leave.

“You have lots of choices, Chiquita,” he said, catching up with her. Like the one she’d need to make in a few minutes. He took her hand and led them up the path. “Right now, we need to go talk to your brother. Although I wish otherwise, there’s something you need to know.”