Something Like Rain (Something Like... Book 8) (56 page)

“Why not?”

“It’s gross.”

“It’s
American
cheese.”

William shrugged. “That doesn’t mean it tastes good. Or like anything. I don’t think it really qualifies as cheese. I prefer Swiss.”

“I can’t believe they let you into the Coast Guard,” Jason said. “They should do a cheese test during recruitment, weed out the traitors. You like pickles?”

“I’m scared to answer. Are they American?”

“They might be Polish. No wait, it says ‘kosher’ on the label. I think that means they’re kosher.”

William grinned. Give him ninety more years of this. Please. Was that so much to ask? “You know where we should go?” William said, feeling daring.

Jason stopped what he was doing to look at him. “St. Edwards Park?”

“Yeah!”

“Never heard of it.”

But of course he had. As they drove to the park, William began to regret his decision. Their first picnic together was a defining moment in their relationship, and as nice as the day had been, it had been wrought with frustration. They had made clear they wanted to be together, but were unable to act. These memories were on his mind as they sought out the original spot by a small creek, sat shoulder to shoulder, and ate their food.

“Ironic, isn’t it?” William said.

“What?”

“Us being here. Last time you were single and I was in a bad relationship. Now I’m single and you’re…”

“What are you trying to say?” Jason sounded offended. “That I’m in a bad relationship?”

“No! I’m sure he’s really nice. I just meant it feels the same.”

Jason snorted. “Oh, you mean you wish I was free to lean over, just like this, and kiss you.”

William recoiled. “And then we had a discussion about not putting each other in awkward positions.”

“Did we?” Jason grinned, his arm brushing against William’s. “I don’t remember that at all.”

Was this an attempt at humor? Had Jason changed? Did he no longer care about promises or fidelity? “Don’t tease me.”

Jason became somber. “You’re right, and you’re wrong. I shouldn’t tease you. You’re totally right about that. But this picnic is nothing like the last one, because this time we’re both free to do whatever we want.”

“Meaning?” William asked, heart already thudding. “I don’t want to have an affair. I don’t want to share you.”

“Caesar and I broke up,” Jason said. “That’s why I stormed out of the gallery the other night. I decided I couldn’t handle it anymore, so I went home, and we agreed to end it.”

William waited for the smile that always came after Jason had tricked him, but it didn’t appear. “You’re serious?”

“Scout’s honor.”

“You’re not a Boy Scout.”

“True, but I’m being honest with you. I swear.”

“Wow.” William’s mind started to race. A second chance. They could be together! One nagging concern remained: Did this mean Caesar would no longer keep quiet about Boston? He supposed that depended on how amiable the breakup had been. “Is Caesar doing okay?”

Jason groaned. “You’re so nice! Yes, the other guy is doing fine. He moved out already, and look.” He pulled out his phone and held it up. The text message said something about a new job and a hot boss. Caesar certainly didn’t sound bitter.

“Wow,” William said, trying to consider the implications. They were both single!

“Yeah,” Jason said, misunderstanding. “His parents should have named him Casanova instead.”

He kept talking, but William didn’t hear because he was still putting the pieces together. This was good news! Was it too soon to act? Did Jason need time to recover from the break-up? He didn’t seem too distraught. From what Jason said, they had broken up over a week ago, which meant… That little shit! Jason had been playing him when visiting Ben and Tim’s house yesterday,
and
at the apartment earlier, coyly not mentioning that they could be together. Time for a little revenge!

William made sure his tone was grim. “We need to talk.”

Jason seemed confused. “We do?”

“Yeah. I contacted the Coast Guard. They have a position for me. I’d work as a technician. The pay is great, my room and board would be covered by them, and the benefits are amazing. I don’t think I can turn it down.”

Jason swallowed. “You’re serious.”

“Yeah.”

“Where?”

William summoned up his best soap opera performance. “Alaska. I fly out tomorrow.”

Maybe he should have been an actor, because Jason bought it so completely that he seemed on the verge of tears. William laughed to show he was only kidding and Jason’s sad expression became indignant.

“You were kidding?” Jason said incredulously. “You seriously think that’s funny?”

“About as funny as you keeping me in the dark all week,” William retorted. “You have no idea how lovesick I’ve been. All I do is listen to The Cure and pace my old bedroom. It’s pathetic.”

“Geez.”

“I know.” William leaned closer. “I’m miserable without you.”

“How come?”

“Because I love you.” William moved in for a kiss.

Jason pulled back. “Say it again.”

“I love you.” He felt overjoyed that he was finally free to say it. William wanted the entire world to know! Why not? He leaned back, and as loud as he could, shouted, “Jason Grant, I love you!”

Then he was knocked backward, surprised to find Jason’s full weight on him, but he recovered quickly. He stretched out on the grass, wrapping his arms around Jason, and reveling in the kiss that followed. They were together again. No need to discuss it or attempt to squeeze these emotions into mere words. They were back where they belonged. With each other.

Chapter Twenty-four

Paradise was full of simple pleasures, like tracing shapes on Jason’s back in the early morning. Or hanging out with Ben and Tim in their yard, listening to their stories and telling the best of his own. Eating takeout Chinese food on the couch and enjoying horror movies together, or getting drunk with Jason and watching him sit shirtless on the floor as he strummed his guitar and crooned. Paradise was amazing orgasms, tender kisses, secret promises, and a hand in his when they went for late-night walks. Paradise was simple, but it was also fragile. Perhaps that’s why it never seemed to last. Still, five months was a decent run.

“I ran into Caesar the other day.”

They were in the car on the way to a movie. They didn’t know which, having agreed to choose spontaneously once they arrived. Jason was driving, which allowed William to gauge his expression. It seemed fine. So far.

“At the grocery store,” Jason continued. “It was so awkward.”

“Really?” William remained tense, waiting for any of the dreaded keywords. Boston. Adam. Steve.

“Yeah. We both had nearly empty carts, so I couldn’t pretend I was on my way out. We ended up shopping together.”

Giving them plenty of time to talk. “Did he mention me?”

Jason laughed. “You’re mean.”

No, he was stupid for steering the conversation in that direction!

Jason shifted in his seat. “And yes, he did.”

“Really?”

“He wants to go on a double date.”

Now William felt a different sort of apprehension. “No thanks.”

“I sort of agreed already.”

“Oh.”

“Sorry. Considering I dumped the guy, it would have been mean to turn him down. He’s moved on. He’s already seeing someone, so he won’t be trying to get with me, I promise.”

William wasn’t worried about that. Jason had already made his choice. He just wanted Caesar to remain in the past. “Maybe he’ll forget.”

“We have plans with them on Wednesday.”

“What?”

“You always liked double dates.” Jason saw his expression and reached over to tickle his ear. “I suck, I know. At least I made it a weekday so we have an excuse not to stay out late.”

Which in William’s current situation, didn’t really apply. He was working as a paramedic, a job that was familiar in many ways, including the long shifts—three sets of thirteen hours, waiting for anything to happen, responding to a variety of emergencies, and filling out paperwork—all similar to what rescue swimmers do. Racing to the scene of an emergency only to discover someone had cut himself while shaving, or had diarrhea from eating old leftovers—that was frustrating. People didn’t call the Coast Guard for trivial reasons, or if they did, William wasn’t dispatched to help. With the ambulance, he was required to respond no matter the situation, and a lot of people just wanted a ride to the hospital.

“Sorry,” Jason said again.

“It’s fine,” William replied, returning to the present. “I always have fun when I’m with you. Let’s just make it a short night, okay?”

“A short night with them,” Jason said. “A long night for us.”

William smiled. “Even better.”

* * * * *

As the night of their double date approached, William felt increasingly nervous. He kept imagining Caesar accidentally calling him Adam, or he himself using the wrong name, and Jason seeing right through them both. Or maybe Caesar would get drunk and his bitterness would surface along with the truth. William’s stomach was churning when they parked at the steakhouse and walked across the parking lot.

“That’s them,” Jason said.

He spotted Caesar right away, looking sharp in an untucked dress shirt and casual blazer. William felt underdressed in his light sweater and jeans. Caesar’s date was nowhere in sight. Scratch that, his date was a woman!

“Uh…”

“He’s bisexual,” Jason murmured. Then he walked forward, extending a hand, but of course this turned into hugs. For all of them.

“So nice to meet you,” said a petite woman by the name of Mia. She had short dark hair and expressive eyes, which were looking between them with genuine excitement. “You make such a handsome couple!”

“Thanks,” he said. “You do too.” Then it was his turn to hug Caesar. Refusing would seem weird, but he tried to keep his body angled away.

“Should we get a bottle of wine or something?” Jason asked when they were seated.

“Feel free,” Caesar said, “but I’m driving, so none for me.”

Jason looked over at him, questioning.

“I’ll be designated driver,” William said. He might not be comfortable behind the wheel, but at least he would keep his wits about him.

“More for us!” Jason said to Mia.

She laughed, still seeming thrilled by their presence.

They gave their drink orders to the waiter, pondered the menu, made their decisions, and settled into conversation.

“How’s life in the Coast Guard treating you?” Caesar asked. “Is there a base down here?”

“No,” William said. “I’m working as a paramedic these days.”

“Really?” Caesar leaned forward, expression full of awe. “That’s so cool! How do you like it?”

“Here we go,” Jason said, sounding exasperated. When William looked at him for an explanation, he added, “Caesar has a thing for paramedics.”

“I thought you liked veterinarians!” Mia said, swatting his arm playfully.

“Is that what you do?” Jason asked.

She nodded. “Just opened my own practice.”

“Which one? I volunteer at—”

And so it went. Caesar wanted to hear anything William had to say about his occupation, while Jason and Mia had their own interests, complaining about negligent pet owners or discussing vaccinations. These separate conversations came together when the food arrived, but mostly the table remained divided. William relaxed, no longer worried that the topic would take an unexpected turn toward a drunken night in a hotel room.

“I need to use the restroom,” Jason said when they were done eating.

“I’ll go with you!” Mia said, rising to join him.

Caesar chuckled when they were gone. “Does this make Jason the girl in the relationship?”

William shook his head, not understanding. “Sorry?”

“You know how women like to go together to the restroom. It was a dumb joke. But seriously, what’s the dynamic between you two?”

Was he asking who was on top? “You used to date Jason. Do you really need me to clarify?”

Caesar held up his hands. “Hey, I find it’s different from couple to couple.”

“True,” he admitted grudgingly. He had been the top for Kelly, even though it wasn’t his preference. “Still, it’s really none of your business.”

“Bottom,” Caesar said, pointing a finger. “Tops always brag. Bottoms always avoid the question.”

Amusement won over offense, William laughing. “Guilty as charged.”

“If only I’d known that in Boston.”

William glanced toward the restrooms in panic, worrying Jason was on his way back and had overheard. All he saw was overworked waiters. “It wouldn’t have made a difference. I don’t do that with just anyone.”

Caesar studied him. “I take it you haven’t told him yet?”

“No. I thought we agreed not to.”

“I won’t say a thing. I just figured since you guys are long-term now that it would have come up.”

“No. Why would it?”

“I told Mia.”

“What?” William scooted back in his chair, almost getting to his feet, but what would he then do? Burst into the restrooms and make sure Mia and Jason weren’t having a shouted conversation through the wall? They weren’t likely to talk much on the way back either. Still, this doubled the chances of the topic being brought up during this date. “Why would you tell her?”

Caesar smirked. “About us?”

“There is no
us
!”

“Easy. Mia is really into gay guys. Not just the sex, but all of it. Coming out, guys dating guys, forbidden love, pride… She likes my stories. Especially in the bedroom.”

“Good for her,” William said. “Just make sure it stays in the bedroom.”

Caesar shrugged, even though he clearly found the situation funny. “Fine. No problem.”

When the others returned, Jason didn’t seem shaken. Everything was okay.

“Are we doing dessert?” William asked.

“Hell yeah!” Mia declared.

Jason seemed less convinced. “What have they got?”

Caesar picked up the small menu trapped between the salt and pepper shakers. “Let’s see. Truffle fudge cheese cake, oven-warm cookie with ice cream… Oh! They have Boston cream pie!”

William stiffened.

Caesar wasn’t finished. “Anyone want a cream pie?” He looked right at William. “In their mouth? No need to go all the way to Boston. They’ve got it right here!”

Mia laughed. Jason did too. William grabbed the menu from Caesar and glared at it. “I’ll take the cookie.” Then he passed it to Jason, who looked a little confused by his behavior.

“We’ll share,” he said.

“I’ll take the cream pie,” Mia said.

“We’ll share,” Caesar said, winking at her. He waved down the waiter and didn’t make any more loaded references.

Conversation remained pleasant, but every muscle in William’s body was tense until the meal came to an end and they had paid.

“What next?” Caesar asked. “Should we catch a movie?” He smiled at Jason. “A little putt-putt of the miniature variety?”

“I have a long day tomorrow,” William said.

“Oh right,” Caesar responded. “Those crazy long shifts. I understand.”

“We should do it again sometime!” Mia said.

Jason nodded enthusiastically. “Definitely!”

They said goodbye in the parking lot, triggering another round of hugs.

“Sorry, man,” Caesar whispered during theirs. “It was too good a joke to pass up.”

“It’s fine,” William said, but it wasn’t. He didn’t like having a secret that someone could hold over him, and he especially didn’t like that secret threatening his relationship with Jason. Only one solution. He would tell Jason himself. Better he find out that way than from a tasteless joke about pie, and if anything, William was pretty sure it hadn’t been a creampie. More like a two-man bukkake. Ugh. That didn’t make it sound better. At least one was cutely named after a dessert.

“That was fun!” Jason said on the ride back to his place. “I hope it wasn’t weird for you.”

“It was a little stressful,” William admitted. He could expound, but he had learned long ago that a car was not the ideal place to have a potentially heated discussion.

“Caesar hasn’t changed since we were teenagers,” Jason said. “He still thinks of nothing but sex. Same sense of humor too. It’s not for everyone.”

William didn’t mind him that much. Had Jason and Caesar never been together, he would have enjoyed the evening. Now he was scared of how it would end, but he wouldn’t let that stop him. The truth needed to come out. Tonight.

Emma wasn’t home when they arrived at the apartment. He decided to take advantage of the privacy. Jason had flopped on the couch, socked feet on the cushions. He suggested they watch a movie, but William remained standing.

“There’s something I need to tell you.”

Jason’s happy expression faded. “People never follow that up with good news. If you’d gotten a raise, you would just say, ‘Guess what, I got a raise!’ Tell me you aren’t leaving Austin.”

“I’m not,” William said. “It’s about Caesar. I’ve met him before.”

“At the housewarming party.”

“Before that.”

Jason’s brow crinkled in confusion. “I don’t understand.”

“This was a couple of years ago. I was visiting Boston and went to a gay bar while I was there.”

Jason’s feet touched the ground as he sat up, his posture stiff. “Boston isn’t so far from Yale, is it?”

“Is that where Caesar went to school?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh. Well at the time, he was traveling for business, so I guess he had already graduated.”

“He still lived up there until recently.” Jason swallowed. “So is that it?”

“No.”

“Okay. Ugh.” Jason hid his face in his palms. “I don’t know if I want to hear this,” he mumbled through them. Then his hands dropped to his lap. “I guess my biggest question…”

He didn’t seem to be able to finish, and William didn’t make him. “We slept together.”

Jason’s head shook. “You’re serious? This isn’t some fucked-up joke?”

“I’m sorry.”

Jason fidgeted, looking anywhere but directly at him. Then he stood and walked to the balcony door. Once he reached it, he turned around. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t know who he was,” William said. “I didn’t know his name.”

Jason’s expression became even more pained. “You slept with someone, and you didn’t even know his name?”