Somewhere Along the Way (9 page)

Later the next day, back home and alone in her room, Cassie sank into the chair beside her closet and stared down at her cell phone. She’d sent Luke to the store for a few items and was glad she had when she’d received the call a few minutes earlier from the fertility clinic. She hadn’t picked up. She’d just sat there, letting it ring through to voice mail.

She gathered her courage and hit the button to play the message. “Good morning, this is Toledo Fertility Clinic reminding you about your ten a.m. appointment tomorrow. There is no need to call unless you have an issue.”

An issue?

Is that how anyone would describe what feels like the verge of a mental breakdown?

She forced herself to listen to the message again.
It’s time to stop pretending I didn’t have artificial insemination. This is what I wanted. This is the reality of what I chose.

It was the first time Cassie wasn’t sure if she wanted her results to be positive, and that realization shook her.
Why wouldn’t I want to be pregnant?

Because of Luke?

No matter what he said, what are the real odds he’ll be here a year from now? Even a month?

Too vividly, Cassie remembered the cycle of hope and then the days of disappointment that had followed her two earlier treatments. Nothing had been more important than having a baby.

Until Luke.

What if I find out I’m pregnant tomorrow?

She wiped away tears she hadn’t realized had fallen.

What if I find out I’m not?
She stood, walked into her bathroom, and splashed cold water onto her face. She felt sick, but she doubted it was morning sickness. No, her gut was twisted with an emotional turmoil she’d bought upon herself.

Should I tell Luke everything today?

Or wait for the results of my test tomorrow?

If I’m pregnant, will telling him send him running back to New York?

And, if I’m not, what do I tell him then?

The chime of a doorbell rang through the house. At first Cassie thought she’d imagined it, but it rang again.
Oh, great. I usually pray for paying guests, but not today.

Cassie sprinted down the stairs and opened the front door. A short brunette smiled and stepped inside. She started talking before Cassie had a chance to ask her who she was.

“I hope you don’t mind me dropping in like this. I’m looking for Luke Andrade. I heard he was staying here.”

Cassie’s stomach did a painful somersault.
Please don’t let this be his wife.
“Are you a friend of his?” Cassie asked.

“I’m his cousin, Maddy.”

Cassie closed her eyes for a moment as relief swept through her. “He’ll be back in about an hour if you’d like to wait.”

The woman looked at her watch. “That should work. I told my husband I’d be home tonight.”

More good news. She wasn’t staying. “May I take your coat?”

Maddy shrugged off her coat and handed it to Cassie. Cassie had the strangest feeling the woman was sizing her up as she returned from hanging the coat up. “Are you hungry? I have some blueberry scones. They’re still warm.”

“That would be lovely,” Maddy said.

“I’ll bring some out to you if you’d like to sit in the living room.”

“I don’t mind the kitchen, if it’s easier. You don’t need to go to any special trouble for me.” She took out her phone and sent a quick text. “Although if you have an extra one, I’ll run it outside to Gino. He’s unhappily waiting in the car for me.”

“Your boyfriend?”

“Bodyguard.”

“Oh,” Cassie said as she led the way to the kitchen. She wrapped a scone in a napkin then poured hot coffee into a paper cup and handed them to Maddy.

Maddy headed outside with it and returned, shivering. “I should have kept my coat on. Yikes, it’s cold out there.”

Cassie placed a mug of steaming coffee and another plate on the table. “This should warm you up.”

Maddy sank her teeth into the scone with a happy sound. “Delicious. Did you make this from scratch?”

“Yes. I love to bake.”

“You’d get along well with my husband. He’s a chef with an impeccable palate, but I can say with confidence he would love this.”

“Thank you,” Cassie said.

After taking another bite, Maddy wiped her mouth delicately and turned her attention to Cassie. “So, you’re Cassandra Daiver?”

The way she said it made Cassie’s hair rise on her neck. Maddy sounded as if she had information about her. Cassie told herself she was being paranoid. Most likely what Maddy knew was what everyone in town knew . . . Cassie owned Home Sweet Home. “My friends call me Cassie.”

“It’s a beautiful name.”

“Thank you,” Cassie said, feeling at a loss for what else to say, but knowing she was repeating herself.

“And Luke has been here for almost two weeks?”

Cassie ran a dishrag over the counter beside the coffee pot. “I don’t feel comfortable giving out information about my guests.”

“Of course,” Maddy said simply and took another sip of coffee. “Have you owned this place long?”

“Two years.”

“Must be a lot of work for one person.”

Cassie shrugged. “It is, but I enjoy it.”

An awkward silence stretched between them. Cassie straightened up her kitchen absentmindedly. Maddy nibbled on her pastry.

“May I be blunt?” Maddy asked, breaking the silence.

“Sure,” Cassie answered. She had a feeling her permission or lack thereof wouldn’t sway the other woman one way or another.

“I’m worried about Luke. He and I have never gone more than a couple days without speaking. He wasn’t himself before he left New York. I understood when I heard a friend of his had died, and he was flying out here for the funeral. I wasn’t worried at first, but the hospital told me he cleared his schedule of patients until further notice. He’s never done anything like that before. No matter how upset he is, he can’t keep hiding out here. Just tell me, is he okay?”

Cassie clasped her hands in front of her to stop them from shaking. She didn’t want to think Luke was using her as a way of hiding from his life. She didn’t want to think about Luke at all while the little brunette was scrutinizing every one of her expressions. “I really can’t speak for him or his state of mind.”

Maddy frowned. “I understand.” She tapped a finger on the table beside her plate. “You and Luke aren’t . . . together, are you?”

Cassie put a nervous hand up to her hair and turned away. “He’s a guest here. That’s all.”

Softly, Maddy said, “It would be okay if you were. It would actually explain a lot.”

“We’re not.”

Maddy nodded and sighed. She turned and opened her purse. She turned on her phone and asked, “Would you like to see a photo of my husband? This is his ‘stay out of my kitchen’ expression.”

Cassie crossed over to look at the photo. She couldn’t help but smile when the man’s expression seemed to say exactly that. “I can imagine many chefs feel that way.”

“Did Luke tell you he has three brothers? Want to see them?”

Cassie sat down across from Maddy. “Sure.”

Maddy showed her a photo of Luke and three other men, and Cassie spoke without thinking. “That must be Gio. He does look stern. Nick is exactly as I imagined. And, Max, off to the side and independent just like Luke said. Isn’t it funny how family photos capture so much?” Cassie stopped talking when she realized she’d said more than she’d meant to. She hastily added, “I heard Luke describe them once.”

Maddy didn’t look like she believed her, but she didn’t say so. She swiped her phone a few times, then held out another photo. “This is me with my husband, Richard, and our two sons. The older one is Joey. The little one is Adam. I feel badly every time I leave them, but thank God for private jets, you know what I mean?”

“Not really,” Cassie said absently. She couldn’t take her eyes off the photo. It might have been the love in Maddy’s and her husband’s eyes as they looked at each other. Or the way the children were laughing on their laps. They were happy children who had two parents.

In that moment, Cassie imagined herself in similar photo with Luke. No matter how unrealistic it was to hope anything that had started the way their relationship had could end up like the calendar-perfect family in the photo, Cassie couldn’t deny how much she wanted it to.

She covered her eyes and burst into tears.

Maddy gave her hand a light rub. “Oh, no. No crying. I was just trying to find out more about you. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“You didn’t,” Cassie said, even as tears continued to run down her face. The clinic had told her the hormones she was taking to help with fertility could make her more emotional, but it hadn’t been a problem during her first two cycles.

“My cousin Nicole says I’m an emotional ox at times. I’m so sorry.”

Cassie covered her face with her hands. “It’s not you. It’s me. I fucked everything up. Absolutely everything.”

“I’m sure it’s not all that bad.”

Cassie continued to cry. “Yes, it is. It’s very bad.”

Maddy went to stand beside Cassie. She put her arm around her. “Okay, well, my father always says that problems are simply situations awaiting solutions. So, whatever you did, I’m sure we can fix it.”

Only because she had kept her secret inside her so long it was tearing at her to be released, Cassie said, “If I told you something, could you keep it to yourself?”

Maddy’s hand stilled on Cassie’s back. “Yes.”

“You were right; there is something going on between Luke and me. But it’s not going to work out because I didn’t tell him I may be pregnant,” Cassie said, feeling a weight lift from her chest just by saying it aloud.

“Is it his?” Maddy asked.

“No,” Cassie said and stood. She walked over to a box of tissues, took one out, and blew her nose.

***

With his arm full of groceries, Luke knocked on the kitchen door with his elbow. Every muscle in his body tensed painfully when he saw the distressed expression on Cassie’s face. He quickly placed the bags on the counter and took her face in his hands, wiping the remaining tears from her cheeks. “What happened?”

He looked past her and a deep anger began to build within him as he began to piece together what had upset Cassie. “What are you doing here, Maddy?” The contriteness in his cousin’s eyes only fed Luke’s temper. He stepped between Cassie and the person he was beginning to believe he had spent far too much time defending.

Maddy put out a hand in appeal toward Luke. “I was worried about you. I know why you came here. I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

Luke looked down at Cassie’s red and puffy eyes and said slowly, “Are you okay, Cassie?”

Cassie raised a hand to her lips and fresh tears spilled over. She shook her head, but she didn’t say anything.

He turned back to Maddy and snarled, “Did you upset Cassie?”

Maddy’s mouth dropped open. She was used to being indulged, excused. She looked lost for what to say. Well, it was about time she learned she couldn’t crash through other people’s lives as she pleased. Finally, she said, “If I did, it wasn’t my intention.”

Luke advanced on Maddy. “Cassie, could you give me a moment alone with my cousin?”

Cassie laid a gentle hand on Luke’s arm. “It’s not what you think, Luke. It’s not her fault.”

With a reassuring pat to Cassie’s hand, Luke said, “You don’t have to make excuses for Maddy. She makes enough for herself.”

Cassie appealed to Luke one more time. “Luke, don’t let me come between you and your cousin. She’s here because she cares—”

Luke gently ushered Cassie toward the door. “We’ll talk when we’re alone, Cassie. I promise. What I have to say to Maddy has been a long time in coming. I’ll explain it all to you later.”

Cassie lingered at the door for a moment and gave Maddy a look Luke didn’t know how to interpret. The moment she was out of the kitchen, Luke rounded on Maddy again. She was giving him the apologetic eyes that usually won her forgiveness. This time, however, Luke saw it for the manipulative act it was. “How well would you say we know each other, Maddy?”

Maddy clasped her hands in front of her and swallowed visibly. “Well enough for me to recognize that you are really, really angry with me.”

Luke slapped a hand down on the counter beside him. “Do you know how many times I have defended you? When our families split, I stayed in contact with you. These past few years, all I’ve done is encourage my family to accept you, even when I saw how you bulldozed into their lives.”

Maddy squared her shoulders. “Sometimes love needs—”

Luke pushed off the counter. “Don’t spout that shit to me. You think you’ve helped my brothers? Brought us closer? I’d say their temporary truce is despite you. Without you, my mother wouldn’t have gone after Julia. She wouldn’t have been able to threaten Rena. Every time I hear of a problem in my family, and I dig for how it started, I always find you, Maddy. You.”

Maddy took a step back, shaking her head. “It’s not like that.”