Somewhere in Between (25 page)

"Definitely. Bet some guys are gonna be pissed now, too.” She winked at Gemma before smiling at the two. “But seriously. Congrats you guys," Becky said as she and Lisa walked away.

After that, Maggie approached them, her boyfriend Stu, in tow. "I heard you guys were finally going out," she said bluntly. For being the good Christian girl, she sure didn't mince words. "I'm so happy you figured it out!" She pulled Gemma into a hug and clapped Elliot on the shoulder before pulling Stu away before he could utter a word.

It was a never ending barrage of congratulatory remarks after that. The whole thing made Gemma uncomfortable. It wasn't so much that people felt the need to comment, it was just that they were coming at her so frequently and it was hard to take. Elliot, fortunately figured it out quickly, and they chose to take lunch in his car.

"You'd think we were the newest circus act," he commented around his sandwich.

Gemma nodded. "Especially after Trisha all but outted us. Even if it didn't exist at that time, it still shouldn't be that big of a deal."

"You know how it is though. High school, drama, who's dating who. It's like Hollywood, but smaller."

Once school ended, both high-tailed it to the car to escape.

*LtB*

The next day, prepared for another round of commentary, Elliot had suggested avoiding the lunch room all together. Gemma was ready to agree when Leighanna stopped their escape. "Trust me. They'll leave you alone with me around."

She was right. With Leighanna next to them, people kept their distance, knowing that she'd probably tell them to go away. Trent couldn't help but laugh at the way his girlfriend intimidated people. "My baby is a guard dog," he'd said with pride in his voice.

From then on, people left Elliot and Gemma alone. Their novelty wore off as Valentine's Day came and went, forcing boys and girls alike to think more about their own romantic lives than that of someone else. For Elliot and Gemma, it was a simple celebration. They didn't exchange gifts, and didn't go out to eat at a fancy restaurant. What they did do was make some popcorn, pop in the
Lord of the Rings
trilogy, and watch all three extended edition movies until both fell asleep. They wanted to keep everything small, comfortable.

*LtB*

As February turned into March, Prom preparation began helping to keep further distraction off of the two. And as the days passed, and Spring Break approached, bringing about the end of March, the ease in which Gemma and Elliot fit together, was wonderful. It was effortless.

Unfortunately, that couldn't be said for every relationship.

Josh and Christie were still only talking on occasion, as Christie still had moments of reversion any time she felt left out. And her relationship with Gemma was nearly non-existent. She had yet to say anything to Gemma about what had happened that first day back at school in January, and only spoke to Elliot at dinner, if it was necessary. Both felt very discouraged by this, but held on to the hope that Christie was just working through whatever was going on with her. They did wonder if Christie was somehow still in contact with Penny and Cassie, but were reassured from Trisha, of all people, that both girls were placed in separate boarding schools that were the strictest in the nation. How she knew, neither Elliot nor Gemma were willing to find out.

One thing that was a positive was the relationship Gemma developed with Trisha. After everything that the two young women had gone through, together and individually, they formed a special bond. It was weird for Elliot to know his girlfriend was hanging out with the one who had blinded him, but he let it go because it helped Gemma.

"You two are adorable together. You know that, right?" Trisha asked Gemma one day as they spoke before Gemma's doctor's appointment and after Trisha's had ended.

Of course, Gemma blushed. "Thank you."

"I know he liked me once. I know those rumors weren't completely false," Trisha said shocking Gemma. "But I also knew that it wouldn't have mattered, even if I did give him the time of day."

"Why's that?" Gemma asked, wondering if she wanted to know.

"Because he loves you. You don't have to know him to know that. It's all over his face, deep in his eyes." The statement was simple and forceful. "He would have realized it sooner or later if I had given him a chance. He looks at you, and
always
has looked at you, the way every girl who likes a boy wants him to look. I'm so happy you guys have each other."

“I love him too,” Gemma said softly back.

“Have you told him yet?”

Shaking her head, Gemma felt guilt. While he hadn’t repeated the words since that first day, Elliot had said them to her. She knew she felt it, knew she wanted him to know, but a part of her was still terrified.

“Tell him when you’re ready. Don’t say it just because. Say it because you not only mean it, but are ready to have it overwhelm you.”

Gemma never told Elliot of that conversation. Not because she didn't want him to know, but because it was important for her to know, for her to process completely. And she didn't want to make him uncomfortable considering he found it weird for her to be friends with someone she hadn’t been completely comfortable with months earlier.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN              

They were two days into Spring Break when there was a knock on the door that made the fairytale take a backseat. Gemma and Elliot sat on the sofa, watching a college basketball game with Leighanna and Trent when Andrew walked into the room with a tall black-haired man wearing a crisp suit and long coat.

"Gemma, got a visitor for you and Elliot." Andrew moved around to sit in his chair, offering a seat to the man and asking Leighanna and Trent to give them a moment.

"Hello, Gemma, Elliot." He shook their hands before sitting. "My name is Agent Carlos Ramirez. I am the FBI agent in charge of your case. I just wanted to take a moment to speak with the two of you about how things are progressing, the steps we are taking, and anything else you may have questions on."

For nearly two hours Agent Ramirez spoke with the two and Andrew, until Caroline came home from work and joined the conversation. He explained the nature of the case, how there were two other agents working with him in other cities, hoping to gain better ground on the three men. He told them Agents Susie Cromwell and her husband Alex were his go-to in Tennessee and Minnesota and that there had been a report of another attack, this time in the three men's home state of Idaho. The reason for the delay in speaking with them was due to that investigation.

"They're still at large, hurting others," Elliot whispered, echoing the thoughts in Gemma's mind.

"We have contacts with the Broomfield Police, and surrounding areas, including surrounding states. And in each district, every police force is at our disposal, as we have set up a task force to ensure they do not get away. No one wants to see them get away with it," Agent Ramirez stated firmly, his youthful look fading with the force of his words. "I just wanted to take tonight to come and introduce myself, explain a little of the situation and let you know we haven't forgotten you."

With a promise to be in touch, Agent Ramirez left the Grady house. It was so quiet one could hear a pin drop. Until Gemma couldn't take the quiet any longer. Rising from her spot on the sofa, finding her legs weak from the prolonged sitting and tension, she moved to the kitchen, surprised to see Trent still at the house. She'd almost forgotten he was there before Agent Ramirez arrived. She felt guilty for that, and Leigh must have noticed.

"Don't."

"Don't what?"

"Whatever you're thinking, don't worry yourself about it."

"But-"

"I said don't." Leigh spoke with such finality, that it instantly quieted Gemma, her jaw snapping shut.

Several seconds passed before anyone spoke. "Gemma?"

It was Trent that time. "Yes?"

"Are you okay?" His question was soft, and so sweet coming from his intimidating frame. It nearly broke her heart.

"Not yet, Trent." He just nodded at her. He was older than her, a senior to her sophomore, and yet in that moment, her answer made him look like a lost little boy. And she wanted to comfort him, take away that look and bring back the jovial smile he always seemed to have in his eyes. In an instant she was furious. Those three men took her innocence from her, destroyed her ability to trust easily, and made her afraid of everything. But they also hurt Elliot, and now it was reaching farther, falling onto Trent, someone who was just her sister's boyfriend, but it mattered because he cared about her.

He reached for her hand, nearly startling her. "Like I told you before, I'm here for you. Anything you need, I'm here for you." The haunted look in his deep blue eyes told her he'd heard everything, so that meant he knew even more. He knew what those men had done to her. He knew that Elliot had found her. Her small circle was growing and that terrified her. Not because she was scared people would talk, but because it meant that they may look at her differently, think of her differently. And perhaps in the end, want to be around her differently.

"I… thank you." She didn't know what to say. She just wanted to run and hide. In one way she was grateful to finally see the FBI working on her case. But on the other hand, she'd been doing so well, things had been going so well, and then with the arrival of Agent Ramirez, it just slapped everything she wanted to push away right back into her face. It was like a cosmic joke. The universe gives her everything she wanted, but it won't allow her to be completely happy because boom! Homecoming night is thrown back at her.

"Elliot found you?" Trent asked, though it seemed he was talking more to himself than asking Gemma the question. "He found you and he…."

"When I left the dance, it was right after I left," Elliot commented, quietly. He was standing at the entrance to the kitchen, his body tingling because he wanted to comfort Gemma but knew she needed a moment.

"And you guys, what? You have been carrying this around all this time?" It sounded like an accusation, and Trent immediately seemed to realize his mistake. “I’m sorry, I just, and you’re just kids! You’ve been dealing with this all on you own this whole time?”

"No one else knows all the details. Outside of the parents at least." Gemma sat down at the table next to her unusually quiet sister. "It's hard enough having it happen, but knowing Elliot saw, that he was there, it makes everything that much worse. It was too much for anyone else to know he was there."

"Why?" Trent asked as Elliot sat beside Gemma.

"Because I liked him before it happened. And I was so humiliated on top of everything." She blushed to the root of her hair. Though it wasn’t strictly embarrassment coloring her features. Instead, Gemma felt mortification, embarrassment, anger, and sorrow fill in the blush.

"You guys sure wasted a lot of time chasing each other around." It was a blunt assessment as far as Elliot was concerned. But he didn't want to agree out loud because he knew he was a stupid teenaged boy who probably would have panicked if his best friend, who happened to be a girl, told him she liked him. "Stop thinking Elliot." He looked up at Trent and laughed. It felt good. "You two are perfect for each other, you know that. Thinkers."

"I hope we do more than just think together," Elliot commented ironically enough, without thinking. His eyes widened and his mouth popped open in shock at himself. He was waiting for Gemma to freak out, waited for her to bolt or for Leigh to hit him. He'd deserve it, after all, for making such a statement.

But none of those things happened.

"Finally, he grows some balls."

That was Leighanna's reaction. Trent's was a laugh. And Gemma… she just smiled with a blush taking to her cheeks that had everything to do with shyness and positive reaction to the boy beside her.

*LtB*

Gemma had a smile on her lips as she went to sleep that night. Regardless of how unsettled Agent Ramirez visiting was, she wasn't going to let herself be moved. And Elliot, his thoughtless comment about the two of them, it made her warm inside. And had Trent ribbing him for the rest of the night.

Before hanging up the phone from their nightly conversation, Gemma told Elliot that one day, she'd like to do more than just think with him too. She could practically feel his smile through the phone, with his quiet exhale that happened to be a little shaky. It made her feel good, getting that reaction out of him. And so once she pressed "end" on her phone, plugging it into the charger, she turned onto her side to stare out the window, letting the warmth of Elliot lull her into sleep.

Of course, sweet dreams don't always come when you want them too, and nightmares don't always know they're not invited. As Gemma was once against reminded that night.

It is cold out. Moving to pull her jacket around her, she finds it's in tatters. Looking down, she notices her shirt is ripped, as are her jeans. And there's blood running down into her shoes, making her socks feel sloshy against her toes. Looking up, she sees the alleyway as her surroundings. Panic instantly takes over, because she knows those guys are around here somewhere.

Looking left and right, everything is still and quiet and that makes her panic rise. But she sees that the alley is open and she's not willing to wait around for them to hurt her more. Running to the edge of the alleyway, toward the front with the shops, she reaches the opening, and runs into Elliot. Relief floods her system and she tries to cling to him. But he won't let her. Instead, his hands grip her arms, holding her body against his roughly. She tries to break away from him, terrified by how he's acting.

Before she can figure out what's going on, his mouth descends onto hers forcefully.

This kiss is not sweet. This kiss is not kind. It's forceful and angry and cold.

She's trying to break away again, but he grips her arms tighter. He's going to leave marks, and not the kind she wants. "Please, stop! Elliot!"

He pulls away from her, his blue eyes menacing. "You're worthless, Gemma. You know that, right? You know I'm only with you because of what happened. You know, I am with you out of guilt and that the idea of kissing you and wanting to is repulsive to me. But I know you want it, so I'll do it. I'll kiss you and when I walk away, it'll be that much sweeter to watch you break."

“Why are you doing this?” she cries against him.

“Because I’m tired of pretending.” He looks at her with a sneer, his eyes stone. “I mean I’ve thought about it, yeah. You put out so easily for those guys, maybe you’d do the same for me. Though you have feelings for me. Last thing I need or want to deal with is you being even clingier than you already are. Sorry, babe. This is not the true love you were hoping for. Maybe I’ll just get what I want and go. You up for that?”

She woke up after that. Tears stained her face as harsh sobs tore through her body. She brought a hand up to her chest, trying in vain to make the ache in her heart stop. But it wouldn't. It was deep seated and harsh. And it made her realize how foolish she'd been.

Elliot had kissed her and it had been beautiful. There was no panic. There was no worry. She was healed! Hallelujah! Only she wasn't even close. And worse, her dreams were making Elliot into a monster. She had thought with the arrival of the FBI agent things would start to get better, after all, more was being done, but her initial thoughts were correct; just as she was starting to get a grip on things, she was thrown right back into her nightmare. Curling onto her side, Gemma wished it were daylight. She needed to speak with someone before she fell apart completely. She needed to speak with someone before she started to know what her dreams were telling her was true.

*LtB*

He knew something was wrong the moment he saw Gemma the next morning sitting at the kitchen table. Her head was down, her eyes puffy. And her cell phone was resting in front of her.

He had tried calling her this morning, before he came over but she hadn't answered. He thought maybe she was sleeping in, but Gemma always heard her phone, and there were always a few sleep-slurred curses that flew from her mouth if she was pulled from sleep. But the phone rang and then went to voicemail. He opted to text and then wait for her to respond, because Gemma was terrible at
listening
to her messages, but she responded to every text that came through.

When he didn't hear back from her after an hour, he decided to drive over, his nerves on edge because he seemed to always be anxious when it came to Gemma now. He'd thought about calling her dad or even Leigh, but didn't want to panic anyone in case she really was just sleeping.

But when he arrived at the Grady household and it was Andrew that let him in, his face drawn as he moved to get ready for work, Elliot knew it wasn't nothing.

"Gemma?" He sat down unhurriedly, not wanting to startle her. But once he was settled, he could see she knew he was there. Her entire form seem to shift with his presence. Raising her eyes, Gemma smiled weakly, and Elliot could see how blood shot her eyes were, as well as see the streaks where tears had fallen down her face. "What's going on?"

"I had a nightmare. I just got off the phone with Dr. Archuleta," she mumbled to him, her eyes moving toward her phone and staring intently at it.

"What was it about?" he asked, though he could tell he'd never find out her whole truth. Gemma had become very guarded with her dreams, keeping them close to the vest, as it were. He knew she talked about them with their doctor, but more and more, she didn't fill him in. Elliot knew it had more to do with not wanting to burden him with them than anything else.

Now that they were together, Gemma had seemed to make it her personal mission to not let anything bring them down. She already felt indebted to him for being with her-a ridiculous notion since he was the lucky one here, so she did everything she could to keep her bad days from him. It was an impossible task, but he knew there was no stopping her or getting through to her. So he tried to support her the best way he could and be there for her however he could.

"Just… things. Remembering my attack, having things add to it that I wish I didn't have to see. Just things." She would never tell him how he had become the monster in her dreams because he
wasn't
a monster. And he didn't need to know her subconscious had made him one. Elliot already carried a heavy amount of guilt for her attack, the last thing Gemma wanted was to add to it. No, this was her battle to fight, she wouldn't place it on his head. "I'm okay now."