Sophie's Path (22 page)

“I'll hold you to that.”

She leaned into the car and pulled out her purse, digging around till she found a scrap of paper and a pen. “Jeremy. You call me on my cell. Okay? I have it with me all the time, except when I'm in surgery. Anytime you feel... Whenever you need me, you call me. It was pure luck that I was at the Alliance today and was able to talk to you.”

“Yeah,” he said, stuffing his fists in his pockets. It was eighty degrees outside and he was wearing the sweatpants she'd bought him at the Goodwill.

Concern and compassion exploded in Sophie. She couldn't help putting her arms around his scrawny frame and giving him a hug. “I want you to be well, Jeremy. That's all.”

“I know, Sophie. Thanks.”

He broke away from her and shuffled into the house. The rickety steps barely moved under his weight.

Her heart melted all over again and what little hope had sprung to life inside her froze.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

J
ACK
SLID
HIS
car into the parking space two blocks from his office, directly across from the county library and around the corner from Maddie's café and Grandy's Groomers. He turned off the engine and punched out Sophie's phone number.

The call went to voice mail. Again.

“Hi, it's Jack. Just wanted to say good morning. It's a beautiful day and I was wondering if you'd be up for a run tonight around the lake. No rain predicted. That's a plus. Call me back. 'Kay?” He hung up and looked at Frenchie, who was staring at him from her doggie seat on the passenger's side of the car.

Jack shrugged. “So, she's busy. It's early. Not even seven thirty. I bet she's got an early surgery today.”

Frenchie didn't blink.

She recognized excuses when she heard them.

“You're too smart. Okay. Come here,” he said, gathering the dog, her leash and a new tote with her treats in his arms.

“I need a latte. Then we'll tackle the world.”

When he entered the café, Chloe Knowland greeted him with her usual pert smile.

“Hey, Jack! Hi, Frenchie.” Chloe reached out to pet the Yorkie-Poo.

“She's a cutie, isn't she?”

“Yep. Adorable. You want the regular?”

“Sure do. To go.”

Chloe began making a latte and then turned to the cupcake display case, pulled out a yellow cupcake and squirted vanilla bean whipped cream icing on top.

A voice behind him said, “Lucky dog.”

He turned slowly. Sophie. She gave him a smile so warm and powerful it could crack through a glacier. It certainly caused the earth to quake under his feet.

He managed to smile back.

“I'm just guessing that vanilla cupcake Chloe is wrapping up will find its way into Frenchie's mouth.”

“Sweets are bad for dogs,” he countered, with a mischievous gleam in his eye.

“But you don't abide by those rules, do you, Jack?”

He reached into his back pocket for his wallet. “Well, some rules are meant for breaking.” He chuckled and handed Chloe his money.

Sophie's grin was filled with self-satisfaction. “I was hoping you'd say that.”

“Is that right?”

She nodded and petted Frenchie. “Sorry I missed your call, but I was sitting by the window and saw you coming in. I thought I'd walk back with you to your office. I don't have a surgery till eight thirty. I got a little reprieve this morning.”

Jack took the latte and handed the cupcake box to Sophie. “Could you hold this till we're outside? I'll let Frenchie walk to the office.”

They left the café and Jack put Frenchie on the sidewalk.

Sophie looked at Jack. “I wanted to talk to you—but not on the phone.”

His breath caught. “This doesn't sound good.”

“It's private. So I wanted to talk to you, er, privately.”

Jack watched Frenchie as they walked. “Is this about our kiss? Because that's why I was calling you so much.”

“Actually, yes.” She nodded, but kept her gaze ahead. He wasn't sure how to read that.

Jack pulled up short, took her arm and turned her toward him. He needed to see her eyes. See if he'd been mistaken. A smile crept onto her lips, lighting the fire in her eyes that he'd seen during the storm. “And what did you want to tell me about that kiss?”

She hesitated. “I, uh—”

He cut her off. “Because I wanted to say that I hoped it was the first of many.”
Hundreds. Thousands
. He rushed on, “You weren't going to give me that, ‘Oh, it was all a mistake speech' were you?” He swallowed a burning lump in his throat. When had Sophie come to mean so much to him?

“No, Jack,” she said earnestly, touching his arm and not letting go. “I wasn't going to say anything like that at all. I wanted to apologize. I've been so busy for the past couple days that I've barely had time to text you back. I didn't want you to think I was avoiding you.”

“Really?” He felt his heart flip over. Joy? Was that what this feeling was? “Because I was worrying... I mean, wondering if you, well—”

Sophie rose up on her toes and kissed him. Brazenly. And right as Helen Knowland, the town's most active gossip, passed them on the sidewalk. Jack shut his eyes. Shut out the world. He didn't want to miss the taste of Sophie's lips on his. He wanted to hear the sound of her breathing. He wanted the kiss to go on forever. He wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her close. His emotions overwhelmed him. Frightened him a little in their power.

Sophie's kisses were like raindrops: gentle, endearing. Unforgettable.

Jack didn't want the reverie to end. Ever.

But she pulled away and he opened his eyes. Her eyes held endless caring. But was it love?

Love?

Did he just think that?

Jack Carter did not ponder the concept of romantic love. At least, he hadn't before Sophie. She'd made him think about a lot of things that had never been part of his consciousness. His was a world of business and investments. Security. Retirement planning. Graphs. Statistics. Premiums. Now he was aware of people's needs in a different way. The organizations he'd joined to find clients suddenly represented the children in the community who needed breakfasts where there were none. Playgrounds and parks where not enough existed. Educational programs and sports events that helped disabled children and adults feel productive and valued.

Sophie cared about so many people, yet somewhere in that enormous field of altruism, she held a special place for him. He almost felt he could bask in it. But maybe she was just taking pity on him.

Nah. Not after
that
kiss.

It was filled with wanting and eagerness.

“Jack,” she whispered against his lips. “Sorry about that. It was a test. I confess to using you as my guinea pig.”

“So, I'm just research?”

She grinned and put her arms around his neck. “No way. I was afraid that what I felt, what happened between us, came from getting caught up in the romance of Katia's wedding. I had to be sure.”

“And what's the diagnosis?”

“Positive. With only one cure.”

“What's that?”

“We need to see each other a lot more.”

“I like this,” he replied quickly, before she could change her mind. “How about tonight? We could run together. Supposed to be a pretty sunset.”

She smiled sweetly and all he could think about was taking her away—maybe in a little boat on the lake—for hours.

“I could make dinner, if you went shopping for us,” she suggested. “I have surgeries all day. I won't have time to break away.”

“Sure. What can I get?”

“Start with garlic.” She laughed. “I'll text you a list. Any dietary restrictions?”

“None,” he replied, releasing his hand from her back. “I've been known to grill a mean steak.”

“I was thinking about chicken, angel-hair pasta and homemade pesto.”

“Sounds incredible.”

“Oh, believe me. It is.” She looked off toward the courthouse clock tower and the hospital. “I have to run. Literally. Or I'll be late. Where shall I meet you?”

“My place? Six?”

“Six thirty. I have my running shoes in my car.” She gave him another quick kiss. “See you.” Then she turned and broke into a sprint as she raced toward the light at Main and Maple.

The entire block seemed empty without Sophie, as if oxygen had just left the air.

* * *

J
ACK
FINISHED
HIS
phone call with Katia, who was checking in for her daily report from Venice. A moment later, Melanie tapped on his door.

“I have to leave early tonight. My son's baseball game.”

“Oh, right. How're they doing?”

“Still winning. If this keeps up, his team could be city champs. Next summer we're hoping to send him to baseball camp, but it's expensive.”

Jack rubbed his chin. “But he's got real pitching talent. Let's talk about it. I want to help him, er, you, in any way I can.”

“Jack.” Melanie's voice hitched as her hand flew to her heart. “That would mean so much.”

Jack smiled. “It would mean more to me. I have plans tonight, but when is the next game?”

“Saturday morning. City Park.”

“I'll be there.”

She gave him a thumbs-up. “Great. I'll tell him. Well, I'm going to head out. Owen is still with his client.”

“'Kay,” Jack replied. Frenchie jumped into his lap, which was her signal that he'd given enough attention to someone else. Now it was her turn.

Jack finished a couple emails then stepped into the reception area, Frenchie right on his heels.

He went over to the windows and glanced out at the clock tower. Nearly closing time. He'd be seeing Sophie very soon.

He reached into his pocket for his cell phone and checked his texts. Nothing. She hadn't sent him the grocery list she'd promised. He figured she must be stuck in surgery.

Suddenly, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted her. Coming out of the Recovery Alliance. She was with a guy. Jeremy?

He went closer to the window for a better view.

Sophie never took her eyes from Jeremy's face. Even from half a block away, Jack could see she was imploring him with her words and gestures. Whatever point she was trying to make, she was doing it with a great deal of gravity and sincerity.

Jeremy walked away from her, but Sophie went after him and ushered him toward her parked car.

Jeremy pounded the roof of the car. She shouted something to him and he flung the door open and got in.

Sophie got in the driver's seat, then they drove away.

Clearly, Sophie's work as Jeremy's sponsor was difficult and stressful. It required not only her time but a great deal of her attention. He knew it was early in their relationship, but Jack couldn't help wondering: with all the commitments, people and priorities in Sophie's life, would she have time or even energy for him?

Jack had started to lose his heart to her. But what about Sophie? She'd said this morning that she wanted to spend more time with him. Was she being truthful? Or just kind, the way she was to Jeremy. As far as Jack could see, Sophie couldn't help but help others. If she perceived a need, she tried to fill it.

And Jack's need was to be loved by her.

But could she love him?

Would he see her tonight, after all? He glanced at his phone. No emails. No text. No grocery list. The depth of his disappointment surprised him.

He glanced back down Main Street. There was no sign of Sophie's car.

What road had her bleeding heart taken her down this time?

Jack shoved his hands in his pockets. Perhaps it was better if he didn't travel it with her.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

S
OPHIE
STOOD
ON
Jack's doorstep with three cloth bags filled with groceries, a bottle of Liz Crenshaw's Cabernet Sauvignon and a stuffed toy for Frenchie. She rang the doorbell and almost immediately heard footsteps before the door was jerked wide open.

Jack was in his running clothes, one sneaker on his right foot, one in his hand. He put his other hand on his hip and glared at her. “You were supposed to text me.”

“I did.” She matched his frown with one of her own. “You didn't get it?”

“Obviously not.”

Frenchie came to the door and barked at Jack.

“She doesn't like you arguing with me,” Sophie said with an amused smile.

“I'm not arguing,” he retorted.

Sophie felt terrible. After their last surgery, which had blessedly taken an hour less than planned, she'd found a message from Jeremy on her phone. He was deeply depressed and struggling. She'd left the hospital hurriedly to meet with him and calm him down, while simultaneously boosting his spirits. She'd texted Jack that she would be later than she'd planned and that, to make amends, she would do the shopping.

Sophie's feelings for Jack compounded her worry about Jeremy. In some ways, she felt as if they'd been brought together by cosmic forces. To an onlooker, nurse and patient meeting in the ER wasn't all that unusual. But in Sophie's mind, meeting anyone who made her feel as if her life had been completely disassembled and then put back together in an entirely new configuration was an utter impossibility. Sophie had never planned on falling in love.

Love didn't happen to her.

Yet here she was.

At the moment, though, based on Jack's stormy expression, he was anything but a man in love.

Something had happened to change him from the man she'd kissed on Maple Boulevard this morning to this guy who looked ready to take on the next MMA world champion.

Sophie knew it was best she meet his anger head on. “I can explain,” she said, pushing past him into the condo.

“Fine,” he replied, tossing his shoe into the corner. “I take it we're not going running.”

“I'm game if you are. I brought my stuff.”

“No,” he spat out. “I'd rather run alone.” He took off his other shoe and threw it down with the other sneaker.

Sophie put the bags down on the granite countertop. “Okay. Out with it. What's got you so riled up?”

“I saw you today.” He pointed his finger at her. “On the sidewalk in front of the Alliance with Jeremy. I know you feel responsible for him. A sense of duty. But I feel a bit lost here, Sophie. I don't know what to think. One minute you were kissing me and telling me you want to spend time with me and the next minute, you were standing me up.”

“It was a tech glitch, Jack. That's all. I did try to text you.”

He slashed the air with his hands. “Stop! Fine. I will give you that. But the real issue here is that I don't understand you.”

“Sorry?”

“You have to know that your dedication to the Alliance could cost you your job. I know Emory Wills. He's a control freak about his ‘rules,' both written and unwritten. If Emory finds out about you sponsoring Jeremy, he could easily fire you. But the bottom line is that with all your concerns, I just don't think you have room in your life for me.”

Sophie felt deflated. She sank onto a bar stool. “That's not true, Jack. I want there to be time for us. And I wish I could stop myself from over-scheduling. Rationally, I agree with what you're saying. I can't keep this up forever. But Jeremy needs me. He's so desperate. He's in so much pain.”

“I can only imagine.”

“Yes.” The night of the accident flashed through her mind then that image was replaced by Jeremy's tortured face. She remembered his fear-filled voice on the phone. “I don't have the answers, Jack. Sometimes, I feel like my efforts are a pinprick in the sky. Yet, on the other end of the line is a person asking for a kind word. A moment of my time to tell him he matters.”

“But it's dangerous for you.”

“I know it must be hard to understand my need to help Jeremy, but I feel that what I'm doing could make a difference.”

“How? Do you honestly believe he can be cured?”

“Eventually, that
is
what I'm hoping for, Jack.”

“Is that possible?”

Sophie took a deep breath. “In my world, just about anything is possible. I've held a human heart in my hand and watched it beat. I've held a preemie infant weighing less than two pounds and watched her not just live, but grow and thrive. I've seen patients beat every odd in modern cardiac medicine and live years longer than they should.”

“So this is a new challenge for you?”

She was thoughtful for a long minute. “It is.”

He folded his arms over his chest. “From what I see, he's the type of person who chooses to use drugs and then goes out into the world and hurts innocent people.”

“Jeremy has a disease. It's no different than leukemia,” she countered.

“Sure it is, Sophie. It involves choice.”

“Jack...” Sophie took a deep breath, hoping to gain some courage. “Aleah is the elephant in the room. I can't help thinking that every time you get upset about something with me, it's really about that night. About Aleah. Will you ever forgive me for what you think I did or didn't do?”

Jack's eyes filled with pain, and he took a long moment before he answered her. “Truthfully? I don't know.”

“Great.” Sophie's blood turned to ice. She hadn't expected that. She'd thought they'd gotten past that night.

She started to rise.

He reached out and touched her arm. “Please, Sophie. I understand that Greg Fulton killed Aleah. Not you. Not all the other addicts and diseased people struggling with addictions like you tell me. And are showing me. It's taken a lot for me to get there. It was Greg on that one particular night. Logic and fact tell me you did all you could for Aleah.”

“But...” she interrupted. Ever since their kiss, Sophie had been picturing a future with Jack. Now that vision was dashed. They were back at the beginning. “You can't forgive yourself.”

He lowered his eyes and Sophie felt the weight of his emotions as acutely as she did that of Jeremy's and every other patient she'd known. Her grandmother told her she empathized with other people so deeply that she took on their troubles. It was a curse, not a blessing.

Sophie placed her hand on Jack's shoulder. He covered her hand with his, but still didn't look at her.

“They say that the shadow of a person's death fades in time.”

“They do say that.”

“I wish it would,” he replied, meeting her gaze. His face was filled with questions and doubt.

Sophie's heart sank. “But we might never get past this. You won't let it go, will you, Jack?”

He ground his jaw, his eyes stern and unrelenting. Sophie thought she heard her heart break.

“I don't know how,” he croaked.

He hadn't said he loved her, yet that tiny clutch of emotion told her she still had a chance with him—if she fought for it.

For them.

And for the first time ever, Sophie wanted that chance. She wanted this man to believe in her. To support her. To be on her side. With a jolt, she realized that she needed Jack to be there for her. She had to convince him.

“Jack,” she said softly. “Jeremy is a danger only to himself. He doesn't drive a car. He doesn't even ride a bike. He uses drugs and alcohol to self-medicate. He comes from a good family in Phoenix, but he is so ashamed about what he's done to himself that he refuses to even call home. So he's not getting love and support.” The next words were so painful, they scratched her throat on their way out. “Jack, he's threatened to kill himself. I've done all I can think of to give him hope...something to hang on to...” Her eyes filled with tears. “But I don't know if it's making a difference.”

Jack slipped his fingers under her chin and lifted her face to his. “I'm sorry, Sophie. So sorry. What you're doing is noble, and I'm being arrogant.”

Jack slipped off the stool and put his arms around her shoulders. “I think I understand a bit better,” he said, kissing her forehead. “But will you listen to what I have to say now?”

“Yes,” she replied, liking the warmth of his arms around her and the safe feeling of her cheek against his chest. It was comfortable here, in his embrace. There were no lost souls or broken bodies for her to tend and mend. There was only this man and this moment with him. And it was enough.

“I think you've let this one assignment—and that's what Jeremy is—become your world. I've done a little research on my own about sponsors. Apparently, they have to learn to balance their own lives with their work. To be able to detach, get some distance. Jeremy is part of your work world. You forgot about our plans for tonight. You were late. You texted me, but did you pick up the phone and call when you didn't hear back from me? You took it upon yourself to go the grocery store, when I said I'd be happy to do that for us.”

He paused for a moment, rubbing her back and shoulders. “I'm not trying to sound petty, but I guess what I'm saying is that I want to be as important to you as this sponsorship and your other projects. I want a place in your life.”

She looked up into his compelling eyes. “You mean a great deal to me, Jack.”

“Sophie, you're the kind of woman I want to lasso the moon for. I want to be there for you. But I also want you there for me.”

“Jack, I can't tell you how much this means to me. Aside from my family, I've never had anyone, well, on my side.”

He held her at arm's length and peered at her quizzically. “Never? Not once?”

“Nope.” Then she sighed. “Not that I ever gave anyone a chance.”

“And why was that?” he asked, mirth dancing on his lips.

She let herself respond coyly. “Maybe I didn't see potential in any of them.”

“Hmm. So that's it? I have potential?”

“And you're a challenge.” She chuckled, sliding her fingertips under her eyes to wipe away the last tear. “You're the first garlic-free household I've ever visited.”

“Aw, c'mon,” he groaned as she rose off the stool and slid her arms around his waist again.

“See, you need my help,” she said. “I'll open new worlds to you once I'm let loose in this kitchen.”

Sophie knew they hadn't worked everything out yet, but for now she was content that they were making progress.

As Jack unloaded the groceries onto the counter, Sophie took out two wineglasses. Jack got the corkscrew and opened the bottle. Then he poured the wine while showing her where he kept a mismatched assortment of pots and pans.

She kidded him about proper cooking tools.

He picked up her hand and kissed it.

When she mashed the pine nuts in his blender, Jack grimaced, as if she'd defiled sacred territory.

Jack found a bottle of olive oil in his pantry. Unopened, of course.

As Sophie sautéed garlic, filling the kitchen with a heavenly aroma, she gave Jack directions for getting the pasta ready.

The rest of the evening passed sweetly. Sophie complimented Jack on his sous-chef skills and Jack told Sophie her cooking was the most delicious he'd ever tasted. Not once during dinner or at any time while sitting on Jack's deck with a glass of sauterne, gazing at the full moon and talking about their childhoods, did the thought of Jeremy or Aleah cross Sophie's mind.

When she returned home and dressed for bed, brushed her teeth and slathered lotion on her legs, all she could think about was Jack.

Nothing about her growing feelings for Jack was intoxicating or dramatic, like it had been with other guys. This was nothing like those flash-fire attractions that lasted for a few days or weeks before dying away.

And why was that?

For one thing, Jack seemed to be looking deeper than her heart-shaped face and flirty nature. He was seeing the real Sophie, the Sophie who intimidated most men once they got to know her. Sophie had rock-solid goals and intentions. She didn't need a man to pay her bills, be her social life or help her find a football team to root for. She'd created a life for herself on her own terms.

Still, she realized that getting Jack to support her beliefs and efforts in everything she did, including her work with Eleanor and Jeremy, was of great importance to her.

Whether Jack was up to that kind of challenge, only time would tell.

She hoped he would be.

She could almost feel her heart wince at how much she wanted Jack. She didn't need him, but she wanted him. The more time she spent with him, the more she liked about him.

Sophie had been making significant changes for months now. She'd pinned and repinned, nipped and clipped the pattern of her life, creating a new tapestry. She wanted it to be everlasting and glorious. And she wanted—oh, how she wanted—Jack sewn into it.